Cher36 2005

[Sassy69]

It does take soem time to get your mind in the right place and we know you can do it when you are really ready Then its just like riding a bike. But, hey, everyone falls off a bike now & again!

 

[jenscats5]

That's so true.

Also, I have packs and packs of DENTYNE FIRE in my office, car, gym, and kitchen.

Anytime I'm in the marketor drugstore I buy a bunch.

It's an oral thing - actually I think most eating other than for fuel is an emotional oral thing.

Thank you Ms. Freud....

Actually a lot of your food issues could be mental & in your head. Do you have health insurance?? A few visits with a psychologist might help you get over your food issues or at least be aware of where they are coming from.

 

[cher36]

I do have health insurance, not sure if it would cover that though.
I think it's just that i looooves me some chocolate and sugar. But then again, i went to a couple bday parties a month or so ago and didn't eat anything there. Now why is that? Sometimes i can and sometimes i can't.
I don't know.!!! I hate myself sometimes
I got so upset with a recent cheat that i actually tried to throw up. And couldn't.. I was so mad I've never done that before though. And I couldn't get anything up...all i got was major cramping under my tongue for some wierd reason.. and i thought "well that's what ya get for eating that..you'll have to live with it.
I'm finding more and more that i try to i guess cause failures..like with the eating...paying bills late, waiting till the last min. to do something important. It's almost as if I want to fail. I think i do need a shrink.
Anyway, i'm not gonna have a pity party.. I'm just going to try to keep logging and even if the choices suck, i'll be honest. It's embarassing to post it, but that will be part of the punishment. I am going to be extremely busy this wkend , but i will try my best to keep up.

 

[*Bunny*]

I got so upset with a recent cheat that i actually tried to throw up. And couldn't..

...Please do not do this again hun

 

[jenscats5]

I do have health insurance, not sure if it would cover that though.
I think it's just that i looooves me some chocolate and sugar. But then again, i went to a couple bday parties a month or so ago and didn't eat anything there. Now why is that? Sometimes i can and sometimes i can't.
I don't know.!!! I hate myself sometimes
I got so upset with a recent cheat that i actually tried to throw up. And couldn't.. I was so mad I've never done that before though. And I couldn't get anything up...all i got was major cramping under my tongue for some wierd reason.. and i thought "well that's what ya get for eating that..you'll have to live with it.
I'm finding more and more that i try to i guess cause failures..like with the eating...paying bills late, waiting till the last min. to do something important. It's almost as if I want to fail. I think i do need a shrink.
Anyway, i'm not gonna have a pity party.. I'm just going to try to keep logging and even if the choices suck, i'll be honest. It's embarassing to post it, but that will be part of the punishment. I am going to be extremely busy this wkend , but i will try my best to keep up.

I feel embarassed to post what I eat sometimes too -- cuz I love food!! And I'm not willing to give up certain things, so it'll take me prolly 2x as long to get to where I want. Oh well.

But if you're thinking of throwing up, trying & giving up & hating yourself -- there might be more to the issue than just not having willpower. There are psychologists who specialize in food issues, really. And call your ins. co & ask -- the worst they can do is say "No we don't cover that." You don't have to tell them you have food issues -- just ask what they cover for mental health.

And food shouldn't be a punishment/reward issue. Food is gas/oil/radiator fluid just like you put in your car. It's fuel, but it's also enjoyable.

Think about this: What type of an eater are you?? Do you like to pick all day?? Graze?? Eat large quantities/large meals? Think about it & try to find a "style" of eating you fall into, then develop your "healthy" eating plan towards that.

For example -- if you're a picker/grazer, you won't be happy only eating 3 meals a day. Lots of very small meals + snacks is the way to go.

You seem to like the junk food/snacks a lot. Start small & start by reading labels. For example, 1 serving of Doritos is 15 chips, while 1 serving of Goldfish is 70 fish. I'd rather satisfy my "emotional/mouth orgasm" by eating the Goldfish, cuz I get more & it takes longer to eat. Pretzels are better than potato chips. Homemade potato chips are better than those bought in a bag.

When you buy chips & snacks -- bring them home & divide the ENTIRE bag into individual serving sizes in sandwich Ziploc bags. That way you have a bunch of Ziploc bags. When you want a snack -- have 1. Buy some rich Chocolate bars -- Like Hershey's Special Dark. When you want chocolate -- have 1 or 2 blocks. Don't try to give up all the snacks overnight -- pare them down 1 by 1 -- baby steps. Also start replacing your favorite snacks with healthier options. Let me know what your favorite ones are & I can think of some ideas for you.

You DON'T have to give up everything overnight. You can do this -- we are here for you.

 

[courtneybcca]

Hun reading that you tried to throw up your food really hit a cord with me… If you want to talk about anything pm me and I will give you my phone number… I have been there. I am a recovering bulimic and anorexic. I started in elementary school, and only finally went into rehab last summer. I deal with it EVERYDAY and everyday is some sort of struggle!! There are probably other issues that you are having but you are trying to control them with your food… So when you are able to control your cravings you feel on top of the world. But when you are not able to, you feel like you have lost all control in your life.. You need to deal with that first before anything else. Realize that you WILL NOT loss weight throwing up your food.. Your body is WAY to smart for that. If you make yourself throw up your body goes into fight or flight mode, and anything you eat after that for a period of time your body will store it because it is afraid you will do it again… BELIEVE I KNOW!!! Most bulimics are either normal weight or a little over weight so don’t be fooled... IT DOESN’T WORK!!!

 

[Miss24k]

Also, I have packs and packs of DENTYNE FIRE in my office, car, gym, and kitchen.

LMAO me too, that's my favorite. I just bought 6 packs today, got to re-stock

 

[Miss24k]

I feel embarassed to post what I eat sometimes too -- cuz I love food!! And I'm not willing to give up certain things, so it'll take me prolly 2x as long to get to where I want. Oh well.

But if you're thinking of throwing up, trying & giving up & hating yourself -- there might be more to the issue than just not having willpower. There are psychologists who specialize in food issues, really. And call your ins. co & ask -- the worst they can do is say "No we don't cover that." You don't have to tell them you have food issues -- just ask what they cover for mental health.

And food shouldn't be a punishment/reward issue. Food is gas/oil/radiator fluid just like you put in your car. It's fuel, but it's also enjoyable.

Think about this: What type of an eater are you?? Do you like to pick all day?? Graze?? Eat large quantities/large meals? Think about it & try to find a "style" of eating you fall into, then develop your "healthy" eating plan towards that.

For example -- if you're a picker/grazer, you won't be happy only eating 3 meals a day. Lots of very small meals + snacks is the way to go.

You seem to like the junk food/snacks a lot. Start small & start by reading labels. For example, 1 serving of Doritos is 15 chips, while 1 serving of Goldfish is 70 fish. I'd rather satisfy my "emotional/mouth orgasm" by eating the Goldfish, cuz I get more & it takes longer to eat. Pretzels are better than potato chips. Homemade potato chips are better than those bought in a bag.

When you buy chips & snacks -- bring them home & divide the ENTIRE bag into individual serving sizes in sandwich Ziploc bags. That way you have a bunch of Ziploc bags. When you want a snack -- have 1. Buy some rich Chocolate bars -- Like Hershey's Special Dark. When you want chocolate -- have 1 or 2 blocks. Don't try to give up all the snacks overnight -- pare them down 1 by 1 -- baby steps. Also start replacing your favorite snacks with healthier options. Let me know what your favorite ones are & I can think of some ideas for you.

You DON'T have to give up everything overnight. You can do this -- we are here for you.

Well said Jens...

Huney don't you dare try that again, we're for you, and we're listening, psot up a thread if you're getting those feelings and we'll help you through it. But definiately do not try to make yourself throw up and hate yourself for it, it's a lifestyle, and if there's some things you don't want to give up you don't have to it's your choice.

You can make healthier treats. I know you said you like muffins, well use oat flour instead of white flour, use splenda instead of sugar, use carob or dark chocolate instead of milk chocolate.

 

[cher36]

You guys are so sweet...ya made me cry!! Thanks for the support and i will keep you updated.
Good for you courtney for overcoming your eating issues!!!!

 

[cher36]

meal 2: roast beef (deli) on 1 slice wheat bread w/ mustard,diet soda
Didn't eat enough at lunch because of being really busy, and ate a couple mini reese cups, and 1 mini reese egg. Should've stopped working and made a salad.
meal 3: 2 chicken drumsticks w/ shake and bake /skin removed, about 1 c. green beans, about 1/4-1/2 c. fruit salad.. apples,s.berries,banana slices,pears, cinnamon.
ate a freakin' grasshopper cookie after dinner. dang me!