Hey Daisy....

[gypsy]

Without searching through all the threads.... a while ago you had set up a web site with weekly pics of your progress toward a competition. Are you still doing that? I lost the web site and haven't seen anything about it recently.

 

[Daisy_Girl]

Nope, not going to compete. I did a lot of soul searching and realized that it is NOT in my best interests (psychologically) to compete. Which is a bummer, since it really limits my fitness modelling. But a month into the prep, mentally I was destroyed. I have struggled with body image issues my whole life. ANd BF pointed out to me, after watching me break down everyday because I was "too fat" that he couldn't watch me do this....that maybe being judged on my body was NOT what was good for me.

But honestly, since making that decision, I have been MUCH happier with my body and my self-image. I very rarely focus on the things I am NOT, or what it "WRONG" with me. I had to totally re-evaluate my training, my diet, my goals. But now I am in a happier, more content place. I still have far to go - physically and mentally - but I am happier with the journey now.

Thanks for asking! We missed you 'round here!

 

[velvett]

I had to totally re-evaluate my training, my diet, my goals. But now I am in a happier, more content place. I still have far to go - physically and mentally - but I am happier with the journey now.

Awesome.

 

[jenscats5]

That is awesome!! Glad to hear it DG....

 

[gypsy]

Wow - that makes a whole lot of sense. I bet a lot of us on here have problems with our body image and esteem, since we are more focused on our bodies than most people out there. The thought has crossed my mind, to compete - but I have a feeling I'd have the same types of issues. I already struggle with body image immensely..... I've been following your diet since January 1. I love it, and I've done wonderfully on it - but once I hit a certain point and I started to plateau a little, I kind of lost some motivation. So now I follow religiously during the week, and gorge all weekend long. By Friday mornings I am exactly the same weight every week now. Good, in that I can enjoy food on the weekend and still maintain a low BF. Bad, because I've stopped advancing. Whereas I was feeling like a rock star while I was losing the weight, now I feel too fat because I'm no longer losing. I knew all al ong that it would have to stop at some point, but it doesn't stop the disappointment when it does. Guess I had that dream that I'd finally get my dream body, but I keep getting constant reminders that it's going to be too difficult to get it. Whoops, I turned this thread from you to me - sorry! I'm very glad that you feel good right now, and that you were able to come to your realization before you stressed yourself too much. Your a smart chick to be able to look inside and know these things about yourself.

 

[Daisy_Girl]

Wow - that makes a whole lot of sense. I bet a lot of us on here have problems with our body image and esteem, since we are more focused on our bodies than most people out there. The thought has crossed my mind, to compete - but I have a feeling I'd have the same types of issues. I already struggle with body image immensely..... I've been following your diet since January 1. I love it, and I've done wonderfully on it - but once I hit a certain point and I started to plateau a little, I kind of lost some motivation. So now I follow religiously during the week, and gorge all weekend long. By Friday mornings I am exactly the same weight every week now. Good, in that I can enjoy food on the weekend and still maintain a low BF. Bad, because I've stopped advancing. Whereas I was feeling like a rock star while I was losing the weight, now I feel too fat because I'm no longer losing. I knew all al ong that it would have to stop at some point, but it doesn't stop the disappointment when it does. Guess I had that dream that I'd finally get my dream body, but I keep getting constant reminders that it's going to be too difficult to get it. Whoops, I turned this thread from you to me - sorry! I'm very glad that you feel good right now, and that you were able to come to your realization before you stressed yourself too much. Your a smart chick to be able to look inside and know these things about yourself.

lol....it doesn't have to be about me.

I think you are right about most people on here focus on their bodies more than many others. If you are involved in fitness - to any degree - you are often hyper-aware of your body and how it "stacks up" to those around you and those in magazines. And 95% of the time, you feel as if you come up inferior. This is tough to get past. It is NOT bad to focus on your body, or to shoot for the stars, expect more of yourself - these are all good things. BUT, when you cannot separate your self-esteem fom your BF% or weight, then there is an issue. We are all so much more than a number.

I read somewhere you should never compare yourself to the people at the gym - compare yourself to people OUTSIDE the gym (general population). And most of the time, no matter the shape of your body, you will come out feeling better about yourself.

Maybe you would benefit from taking a little break from dieting. Like take a week, eat whatever, then hop back on the diet. Sometimes we need a little "breather" to help us re-focus.

Or make the weekly diet less restricting so you don't feel like going "all out" all weekend. Plan more treats in during the week.

 

[gypsy]

I've been contemplating doing just that - taking a week off. It's very hard for me to do it though, I'm such a creature of habit! It would be fun to take the week off, but it would also be a week ridden with guilt. I know what your saying - compare yourself to the general population and MAN I look pretty good! Then I watch to much TV, or look at magazines....and that is what I start comparing myself to. It doesn't help that my BF looks at wwwaaayyy too much porn for my taste, and its always tiny skinny chicks. I'm always told that self esteem has to come from within, but that's a hard concept to apply when there are things constantly fighting it in the opposite direction. Either way, I do think I'll take that week off here soon. I'm going to Mexico for 8 days in October, and want to go all out with the dieting and exercise 2 months before. I guess I can let it go just a tiny bit for now. I can't add treats in during the week, my brain tells me that if I have one single thing that isn't in my regimen that I've ruined the entire days work. I know, I'm psycho - but I can't help it!