Please Scroll Down to See Forums Below Sorry, I didn't mean you personally were making fun of her.
Is everything forgivable?
- Thread starter blueta2
- Start date
Sorry, I didn't mean you personally were making fun of her.
oh ok I was like WTF I'm not being helpful but I'm not making fun
oh ok I was like WTF I'm not being helpful but I'm not making fun
Lolololololo! I shoulda made another paragraph. My bad.
blueta2
New member
I see QT's point; in a spiritual sense when one carries anger, there is a misery that comes along with it. I have a lot of good in my life now and I'm not miserable, but there is this hue of "pain" I carry which I know if I can release it, I probably would have much stronger personal relationships and maybe even have better energy.
In another sense, it's pretty hard to release it.
I tried to forgive the "hiv" ex. Two years after the fact, he came back to tell me he still loved me more than life. I don't want to get into all the details, but I had moved on, was SO over him but still wanted that apology. I felt if I got an apology, I would be able to move on.
When I went to therapy after all this, the therapist told him I had post traumatic stress disorder and to let go was going to take work. I put in the work, and moved on pretty well, but then there was always something to remind me.
Really, I think of my hiv ex and could care less, so yes it's been 12 yrs this June, and I don't love him, don't think about him or even care, but there are something called triggers with PSTD and when I get them, the pain is just as fresh.
Now, with the last ex, well he knew how badly I was hurt and what happened to me, so you would think any "normal" human would be sensitive to that.
He wasn't and I won't get into detail cause he posts here and I don't want to get banned, but he did so much harm to me, that the triggers from the past were brutal!
I was with a man for 2 yrs before hiv ex and the last ex. He was not a nice guy, but this guy saw me at a bar years after we ended it, bought me a drink, apologized for his actions and I hugged him, told him it was ok and we actually would email once a while to say hello.
I TOTALLY forgave him and never even once thought about his actions.
Hiv Ex and the last ex, never took responsibility for what they did, caused so much damage and I never got a sincere apology and I never will, so forgiving them has been really tough.
Like Cindy said, I made this thread because of something her and I talked about and it got me thinking. I want to forgive these people, They are people who are so damaged and I truly believe it wasn't personal what they did, so I need to dig deep into my Buddhist soul and let it go.
On many levels I loved these people in the past and it wasn't all bad. I had many good years and many good times with both of them, and I want to focus on that, but it's so hard for me to do.
It feels WRONG to hate, even though that hate and sustained me to change my life, now I don't need it anymore and am trying to let it go
In another sense, it's pretty hard to release it.
I tried to forgive the "hiv" ex. Two years after the fact, he came back to tell me he still loved me more than life. I don't want to get into all the details, but I had moved on, was SO over him but still wanted that apology. I felt if I got an apology, I would be able to move on.
When I went to therapy after all this, the therapist told him I had post traumatic stress disorder and to let go was going to take work. I put in the work, and moved on pretty well, but then there was always something to remind me.
Really, I think of my hiv ex and could care less, so yes it's been 12 yrs this June, and I don't love him, don't think about him or even care, but there are something called triggers with PSTD and when I get them, the pain is just as fresh.
Now, with the last ex, well he knew how badly I was hurt and what happened to me, so you would think any "normal" human would be sensitive to that.
He wasn't and I won't get into detail cause he posts here and I don't want to get banned, but he did so much harm to me, that the triggers from the past were brutal!
I was with a man for 2 yrs before hiv ex and the last ex. He was not a nice guy, but this guy saw me at a bar years after we ended it, bought me a drink, apologized for his actions and I hugged him, told him it was ok and we actually would email once a while to say hello.
I TOTALLY forgave him and never even once thought about his actions.
Hiv Ex and the last ex, never took responsibility for what they did, caused so much damage and I never got a sincere apology and I never will, so forgiving them has been really tough.
Like Cindy said, I made this thread because of something her and I talked about and it got me thinking. I want to forgive these people, They are people who are so damaged and I truly believe it wasn't personal what they did, so I need to dig deep into my Buddhist soul and let it go.
On many levels I loved these people in the past and it wasn't all bad. I had many good years and many good times with both of them, and I want to focus on that, but it's so hard for me to do.
It feels WRONG to hate, even though that hate and sustained me to change my life, now I don't need it anymore and am trying to let it go
PICK3
New member
oh ok I was like WTF I'm not being helpful but I'm not making fun
sum ngrs need to apologize to me for making fun
don't think they realize my feelings are fragile like a little China doll
just sayin'
your stories make "going it alone route" seem knot so bad
mrplunkey
New member
your stories make "going it alone route" seem knot so bad
odd, it's her photos that do it for me.
blueta2
New member
sum ngrs need to apologize to me for making fun
don't think they realize my feelings are fragile like a little China doll
just sayin'
your stories make "going it alone route" seem knot so bad
It's ok to be alone. I've had a lot of alone time.
It's tough out there to date and people are so set in their ways after 40, but for me, I am not the best judge of men. It's no secret.
I don't want to get into specifics but from my childhood trama the person has passed on so I was never able to hear an appology. I bet they didn't even know I would remember I was so young but I did. My point is if you are waiting for the other person to make a move admit a wrong you might wait forever but you have the ability in your own mind to move passed it.
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