I feel like I almost died today. At 10AM I went out for a 45 mile bike ride...not really a big deal as I do that most every Saturday and sometimes again on Sunday. Usually I eat two meals before I go out or have one and a fairly large dinner the night before to top off my glycogen stores. I also add a scoop of Accelerade to each of my water bottles for another 40gm carbs. I usually end the ride feeling like I could have done another 20 miles easily.
Well, today didn't quite go as planned. I had next to nothing for dinner last night. This morning I had a bowl of cereal and some yogurt at 8:30am. The route is a simple out and back loop. The first 5 miles of the ride are mostly downhill which obviously means the last 5 miles are mostly uphill.
I got about 2/3 thru the ride and I'm realizing I'm not having a good day. I'm getting passed by people I can normally stomp pedaling with one leg. Even on the flat section it was all I could do to keep the pedals going around. I managed to draft behind two chicks for about 3-4 miles. They didn't really have great asses however the Buttman was desperate. I would've glued myself to Richard Simmons' onion if he had been there. Knowing the hills I have to climb to get back to my car I'm trying to conserve what nonexistent energy I have left.
The cardinal rule for fast recreational cyclsts (the leg shaving ones) is "never put your foot down during a ride....ever". Don't stop and rest...only punks get tired. Don't click out of your pedals at stop lights...do a trackstand and balance yourself like a real man. Chicks dig the trackstand. Just call me Girlie Man because I stopped twice on the hilly section even though I made it up at a pretty good clip. After that I was just an absolute zombie. On the final 2 miles which are virtually flat I stopped about every quarter mile and slumped over my handlebars completely exhausted. I didn't have the energy to do anything. One guy stopped to check on me and apparently I managed to say something legible. I was on the verge of hallucinating. I had to pee but there was nowhere private to go on this street. I seriously debated just peeing on myself standing right there.
On a few of those rest stops I think I actually went to sleep right there on my bicycle. The last time I stopped I was less than 150 yards from the finish. I could see the parking lot my car was in right in front of me and I was seriously contemplating thumbing a ride that little distance. You ever see the people wobbling like fools at the end of an Ironman or a marathon? I was about 5-10 minutes away from being that guy. Carbs are good. God bless the carb.
Well, today didn't quite go as planned. I had next to nothing for dinner last night. This morning I had a bowl of cereal and some yogurt at 8:30am. The route is a simple out and back loop. The first 5 miles of the ride are mostly downhill which obviously means the last 5 miles are mostly uphill.
I got about 2/3 thru the ride and I'm realizing I'm not having a good day. I'm getting passed by people I can normally stomp pedaling with one leg. Even on the flat section it was all I could do to keep the pedals going around. I managed to draft behind two chicks for about 3-4 miles. They didn't really have great asses however the Buttman was desperate. I would've glued myself to Richard Simmons' onion if he had been there. Knowing the hills I have to climb to get back to my car I'm trying to conserve what nonexistent energy I have left.
The cardinal rule for fast recreational cyclsts (the leg shaving ones) is "never put your foot down during a ride....ever". Don't stop and rest...only punks get tired. Don't click out of your pedals at stop lights...do a trackstand and balance yourself like a real man. Chicks dig the trackstand. Just call me Girlie Man because I stopped twice on the hilly section even though I made it up at a pretty good clip. After that I was just an absolute zombie. On the final 2 miles which are virtually flat I stopped about every quarter mile and slumped over my handlebars completely exhausted. I didn't have the energy to do anything. One guy stopped to check on me and apparently I managed to say something legible. I was on the verge of hallucinating. I had to pee but there was nowhere private to go on this street. I seriously debated just peeing on myself standing right there.
On a few of those rest stops I think I actually went to sleep right there on my bicycle. The last time I stopped I was less than 150 yards from the finish. I could see the parking lot my car was in right in front of me and I was seriously contemplating thumbing a ride that little distance. You ever see the people wobbling like fools at the end of an Ironman or a marathon? I was about 5-10 minutes away from being that guy. Carbs are good. God bless the carb.