The Prodigal Son (of a b***h)

[The_Monster]

Well, its been over a year, but on the urging of the my ole' pal Lobo I thought Id stop in and see how everyone was doing.
(Dont let the "The_" fool you, its Monster )
I see loads of new names, and dont see quite a few of the old names, but a couple of you are still here...

I missed all of you guys, but Im sure you enjoyed the peace and quiet that comes from my absence. Such as:

*No bizarre threads that lead to eruptions of utter chaos.
*No self serving posts where I vainly attempt to evoke sympathy.
*No asteriks laden lists hoggin up board space.
*No stories of being repeatedly chased by a skunk during AM cardio (you gotta admit that was a good one though!).
*No more nude/sex pictures of me poping up on the board (lets not go into that... let bygones be bygones and all).
*No more daily updates of the drama that is my life.
*No more cleverly (in my opinion... but what do I know) titled threads.
*Just the general sense of tranquility that comes with my absence.

Well, its been a very, very eventful year and a half. Everything from shocking suprises to a cross country move to a very tragic death in the family to more twists and turns than a daytime soap opera. Things that you wouldnt even believe!
Well, its shot day, and if I dont do it while Im thinking of it I may forget all together. I'll check back in a while and see if any of the old gang are watching. Hello to all the new (to me at least) faces here. I look forward to having some fun and sharing my strange and insane (but Id like to think useful) insight with you all...

 

[The_Monster]

Heh heh, yeah... still silky smooth. (thats the other thing I should have listed as a benefit of my absence, no more threads on my "personal shaving " habits).
I actually ended up going all out and shaving everything! Arms, legs, you name it (not my head though. I let my hair grow back and bleached it blond, but my goatee I dye dark brown... nice contrast ). I was getting ready to do a show this past november and started shaving in July to try and get all the nicks and cuts out of the way. It was met with great enthusiasm by my "wives" and has become something I have to do (sometimes I do it twice a day to keep it extra smooth).

Im suprised there is still anything in that general vicinity to shave!?!? Ive been "on" coming up on 18 months now and aside from some initial atrophy, theyve basically held the current size for some time now. Ehh, theyre just decorative to me anyway...

 

[Temple]

Well look what the dog (it was you wasn't it Lobo) drug in.....

Ladiesl, if you don't already know Monster well, there just aren't words to describe. First of all he know what he is talking about and is just filled with all kinds of helpful advice.
Second, you read it right, he did say "wives" as in plural - and it all seems very normal....for Monster that is. He is a rare blend of wisdom and stand up comedy with a bit of new wave fashion thrown in - Ladies, this guy can talk "fuck me" boots with the best of us.
Stick around this time okay, sweetie.
Ladies...fasten your seatbelts...it's going to get interesting around here...

 

[KEL]

* fastens seatbelt and waits for a little fun*

 

[The_Monster]

Well the first thing you need to know is that Im notorious for rambling on and on to make a point, and terrible about digressing to another point alltogether before actually making the one I intended to. For some reason I have been tolerated by the moderators in regard to this...
I'll give a little bit about me. Just a little, but anything you want to ask feel free. Im also shockingly open about my life, but dont ask unless you actually want to know, because I WILL tell you

Im 30 years old, 5' 10".
I started bodybuilding around 6 years ago at 185lbs. Ive been as high as the 270's in a mad quest to reach 300lbs. Personal dramas/traumas saw me fall back down to 210lbs, and Im now floating around 240/250lbs.
I used to be a steel worker, but the wives were both making good money, so I stopped and concentrated fully on bodybuilding (and being a human sex-toy ). We moved across the country and started over and Im now working for an established supplement company (the name of which I am not at liberty to mention) as a regional marketing rep (what region? MYOFinB region... thats what region! ) Heh heh, really though its a great opprotunity and Im marketing a groundbreaking product (I wont go into details here, since George does sell his own line of supps... out of respect...).
Im an ISSA certified personal trainer , though most of the people I train I train for free (I love to help and see people reach their goals).

I use AAS. I have been "on" nonstop for almost 18 months now, rotating from enanthate to equipoise to sustanon now. I rarely use orals, because I abuse them if I have them (hey, know your demons to defeat them), so I tend to not buy any.

Hmm, what else... I dont know. Im sure someone will remind me... (unfortunatly)

My life is and always has been "colorful", I have loads of stories to share, and I dont mind sharing them. If I can help, I'll be glad to. Im very busy so if I dont reply to a post or email, dont be offended, I will as soon as I see it... more than anything else I like to have fun. At first youll like that, then youll probobly be wishing Id shut up.
I wont.
Im sorry.

 

[Bikini Mod]

BIG WET SLOPPY KISS!

Welcome back you fool!

 

[new@gettinbig]

Long time no see sweetie!!! Your posts are greatly missed........u plannin on hangin around at all? Or is this just a short stop on your journey of life?? Either way it is nice to hear from you and glad to see you are doing well.......hmmmmm nothing better than a nice shaved man

 

[litloak]

YIPPEE!!! Monster's back! I was just thinking about you a week or two ago and realized how much I missed your posts. GREAT to have you back!!

 

[Debu]

Nice to have you back!

...do you reallly have wifes vs. wife?

 

[MS]

Mmmmmmmm turtle cheesecake

Hi guy. Nice to have ya around.