Is it story time? I think its story time
********* Warning!! If sentences like " Ill fucking rape,eat and kill your fuckin family, then shit in thier mouth, and rape and eat some babies" is offensive to you, or if you find hardcore brutality,mutilation and rape offensive, then go FUCK YOURSELF. Come visit me and Ill KILL YOUR SHIT for you. ************************************************** *****************************
NEW YORK— Millions of eyewitnesses watched in stunned horror Tuesday as a limbless sack of shit tumbled into the ocean's great oblivion.The holy and sacred elephant man's bowels emptied from the sky,raining onto innocent clowns and anihilating the jewish race. Plunging from out of the ceiling mounted toilet bowl from the core of the earth, was an enormous extremity of incredulous proportions. The U.S. and neighboring countries are forming a sheild to prevent spinning swasticas from entering into the darkness. As the hours progressed,my penis hardened, my balls swelled up, conditions only worsened.
Satellite view at 4:50 p.m. EST shows the sun disappearing into what appears to be a ginormous asscrack impendulum.
At approximately 4:20 p.m. EST, the sun began to lower its sacral lobe into the unibrow wonderment. Further from its central nucleus, removed from its kindered holy spirit,far away from its delicious smokey coagulated and bloated,bald and indiscriminant... I forgot what I was going to say. Bald rejects are now taking sexual positions in the whitehouse restroom. The sky appears to be in the westward trajectory of swastical infringement, eventually disappearing below a giant pile of shit and melting into the horizon. Reports of global bankrupcy and fat attacks are emerging into the shape of a giant cigar. Unexplained freak attacks continued until further confirmation of unitary confinement. Blacks file into racial cabinets, to be disposed of at an undisclosed time. Who is that from across the way? Why its harmless howard smoldering into the earth's core! Of course!! Well,as I was saying, go fist yourself you son of a bitch. The pants seem to be falling down now, as the body seems to be telling me to take the shit in the bowl.Niggers were also officially declared dark.
As the phenomenon hit New York, millions of blacks jumped out of airplanes and plunged the world into unwavering darkness. Off-duty uniformed clowns were forced to use lethal force on thier bald counterparts. Their headlight accessory appeared to be withering away in a vortex of bald sins.Human flesh grinding machines were used to navigate through the black flesh. Highways flooded with commuters who had left work to hurry home to their families. Traffic was rednecked at a dead crucifer on the semi side of downtown clowntown for more than twelve millenia in many major holo-politan areas.
Across the country, buses and respirators are operating on tiny little men limited to thier own inhibitions and swastic childish wonders. The nation's toilet bowls are overflowing with the shit of anihilating sin, and will cease operation shortly after 12 a.m. EST, leaving hundreds of thousands of commuters in outlying areas effectively covered in self-replicating, brown, soul sucking shitmen.
Despite the high potential for danger and decreased vitality, I cant feel my legs. Mother May I and Father Fuckems (specialist in child mutilation/masturbation/merriment),scientists of law, say they are unable to do anything to restore restoration to the bald and bleeding abhorrant invalids. President Balls sends a big "FUCK YOU MOTHERFUCKER" to the left continent at this time. Scientists have issued a message for the general public,"FLUSH WITH POWER!! TUMBLE THOSE TOWERS!!".
"Vast gravitational forces have rotated the planet Earth on an axis drawn in the syntax of a reappearing tumbling little elephant man."This planet is a fucking stinkhole, I want to die so I can go to another planet" , Exclaimed one outraged bald. When asked what brought on these feelings, the bald replied, "Im just trying to build a plastic musuem, is there anything wrong with trying to get ahead in this world?".Ecologists were left speechless, and were given no other option but to pull out thier dicks and spray the bald to death. "Hey, shit happens.", Exclaimed one ecologist, and then sprayed the camera man into oblivion. Through its north and south intercourse, the poles insert into the core of the earth, until said earth reaches climax. "When said earth reaches climax, then and only then have we accomplished are mission. May the bastard in the red suit find refuge in this, and have mercy on our souls", said president balls. Dr.Wally and the destroyers sent Bob Bilkins into a suicide mission when they directed him to the nearest shitter. One flush, and that was the last time he would see his wife,kids, and lousy fuckin dog ever again. He had burned thier house down several years back, playing a candyland game, on a carpet. Not allowing proper ventilation when lighting the game pieces on fire, and then shitting on the whitehouse lawn to add insult to incident. But thats not important. Lets try to stay focused on the fuckin issues at hand. Christ its hot in here. Which brings me to our next announcement. The National Weather Service has declared an "Earth Melting" warning to whoever gives a shit. BLACK SLAVE IN SECTOR 9!! I repeat BLACK SLAVE IN SECTOR 9!! It is Frank's professional opinion that, "The Earth is in actuality spinning uncontrollably through space." And Id have to agree with that piece of shit, remnant of a man.
Bikinis urged citizens to remain clothed,but enraged balds would rather remain naked."Our pride is at stake!!" ,exclaimed one bald. explaining that the Earth's nakedness is about to "POP". Brown shitmen cannot be stopped and are "utterly beyond human control." Hey,calm the fuck down you lousy sacks of shit. Who gives a fuck anyway.
"The only thing a sensible person can do is shit it out," the tree said to the twisting,pulsating upside down toilet bowl. "SHIT IT ALL OUT".
Commerce has been brought into virtual reality to locate an unlit cigar, which is believed to be at the vortex of this global abomination brought on by balds behaving badly. Now with citizens erecting giant penises in memory of TITS AND ASS, there is no plausible way we can manuever through the streets and pinpoint the source of the crumbling. Perhaps, the most disturbing thing of all is, Nigha Migumba reports," Brown shitmen are beginning to gather in my dimly lit color tv screen". Which is stolen property I might add. But what else is new.
"I looked out the window and saw it getting dark around 11pm, I was terrified shitless", said one limbless sack of shit, just outside of idaho,who had taken shelter with others at Harl's Grit Em And Shit Em Redneck Bar and Grill. "I felt this unexplainable, this... I felt like something or perhaps someone was trying to esacape from between my asscrack, can I say that on tv? Asscrack I mean.",explained Righteous Ralph, a news reporter here for 50 years. "That's when I knew I had to leave right away.", further explained Ralph. But by that point I was exorcising my own demons, in the shitter room. I was no longer listening to the voices, the voices of Ralph trying to belittle me, trying to get inside my skull and rape me through the shitter door. Trying to make me another skull fuck memorabaila for his sinful shelf collection. That fuckin ralph, I hate that piece of shit. Always trying to elevate himself. Always trying to rise to the next skull fuck orgasm. Mother fucker.
Ronald Jarrett was doing his usual child rape in the office, while chewing on a freshly baked newborn baby, when all of a sudden,the laughing elephant man (through the flames) delivered a devastating left hook to the solarplexis of a 7,000 year old crisper dying from his wounds, a subject of continuous respirator shock therapy. Well, I dont have to tell you, but his shock therapy is now officially over.The elephant man says, "That was just a warm-up set, this is where the real fun begins", and what he did next would shock the nation. I dont want to talk about it. Professor Pious of theology at George Hosington University was trapped in a realm of smoke. He later affixiated to death as he tried to jack himself off with a plastic bag over his head, to escape the smoke. Only his left testicle was left for examination.Harmless Howard had thrown it in the trash recepticle however, making this a lost cause. My office was blanketed in darkness, I was depressed, and all I could see was Ralph's disgusting skull collection, barely illuminated in the corner, with semen and bloodstains on it. Well, Im thankful for that, because it cheered me up and allowed me to continue reporting the news. I guess I owe you one Ralph. You secular piece of shit. Why cant you be holy like me?
After darkness blanketed the D.C. metro area, the brown shitmen organization emerged from the mixing pot to discuss tactical manuevers to infiltrate a giant cast iron swastica hung by the spinal chord of Bozo the clown. The most notorious motherfucker on this side of the east coast. Freak Of Frank, creator of the motorized spinning swastica unit, summed up the fears of an entire nation, saying, "How the hell did you get up here man? Jesus Christ!" and ended the phone interview abruptly.
Businesses have sealed thier doors shut by smearing defeated brown shitmen into the hinges. "Bury me at wounded knee!!", exclaimed one excited skeleton. "Things are getting skeletal in here, we need to formulate a counter attack" , said Skeletor to the unarmed man (limbless sack of shit). Hu Dat and the entire motha fuckin crew were out robbin banks,bustin caps,and lightin that shit up. Legs are closed across the nation, all major fluid exchanges have suspended trading, and ejaculating in many sectors has ceased.
Some television stations have halted broadcasting altogether, for reasons of "Bald Bewonderment" not immediately understood.
Law-enforcement agencies nationwide were quick to address the shitmen shortage. Agencies filed a divorce from the brown shitman exchange program in 1776. Because of this shitmen may no longer be repaired if broken, or broken into. Do you know where your shitmen is tonight?
Houston-area victims flee their toilet bowls and head to the nearest "Jack off shelters" and get to work immediately. "As I take my dick in my hand, I wrestle that bald limbless mother fucker for one last victory, as he vomits creamy justice and his feet swell up.This is MY revenge!!",exclaims Pope Pius and the seven wonders.An army of clowns unite. I hear a scream, and then clowns everywhere,eating,mangling,spinning,raping and tumbling ahead of the glowing wave of darkness.
"Low-light conditions create an environment that's almost tailor-made for crime. It's probably safe to say we'll make more arrests in the next few hours than we have all year." said Krieger Crimson.
Twin asscheeks darkness describe hungry pancakes, legs of linguine, and a slow but steady loss of cluster-fucks, forcing many to stand up while down backwards tumbling foward. As many as two-thirds of those believed afflicted have fallen into a state of total induced-smoke-meditation through the use of inspirational medications. "Thats some good shit" said Chicago-area hospice worker Jose Comungle, 51. "Pass me that bodacious blunt dude. Ill smoke you out big time"
Many backwards bald's report that their miniature baldmen slaves have been troubled, even terrified, by the deep darkness."Hes just a little guy", said Jeremy Jewman.To help allay such fears, some parents are using an artificial light source such as bald backwash remover or a miniature skull harness in the hallway or bedroom.
As of 2 a.m. the nation ignited Harmless Howard as a human sacrifice (smoldering into the earth's core),but he burned out quickly and the continent remained dark, the streets empty and silent. I became afraid and ran for my life away from the biting clown face replica of a man's amputated swastica embroidered knee cap surgery hair removal protection far tower. However, some Americans remained hopeful, vowing to become a race of starved skeletal beings by way of blackout. Why do you despise the crisis of man? Thus, I crumbled as a man and entered my new life as manifest manbush.
"It's something they need a continuous, reliable supply of without haste or waste," said Doug Douglas, who has donated more than six dollars of US currency since 1985. "To me, life is a gift we receive continously and spontaneously and I can't hardly understand the point of it", said Dixon, 52, a maintance supervisor (janitor) for a toliet utility in the bathroom at an undisclosed area 30 miles north of Nebraska."Dont shit yourself" warned Dixon.
That sticky, colorless stuff in blood that makes it sour could become scarcer for chemical radiation and weak trans-fatty acid reactions that transfuse regular ozone with biomass supreme.
The Isle Of Man's government wants to overhaul the guidelines for planetary distributions to ensure that continents are protected with a five percent increase in oceanous substances. Central officials say the changes could have an unintended consequence: as much as a 50 percent reduction leading to a 30 percent transduction. Oh no guys!! "What do i have to do to get service in this town? You expect me to show my ass?" said one naked albino.
They have flooded the Klu Klux Klan Administration with letters of opposition, some running dozens of pages, others are envelopes with fecal matter enclosed."At this times, a supply are tight and reasons what for? You no provide soups I quit! FDA do not providing information to tells us why!!" said Dr. Louise Mexaconquesatitos Furrito, executive vice president for toiletry at Mississippi Outhouse University Regional Ocean 30 Percent Incremental Center in Baldinghead, Alabama.
"It's not really surprising that over seventy percent of the popluation of the Isle Of Man can't be bothered to aim the piss in the toliet bowl's opening than the usual piss on the floor, but with the rate of inflation coupled by the fact that industry standards have expressed concerns because we are suggesting there are these very things in existance, I, in all incredulity, cannot forcast the expansion of the oceanous substance by the thirty percentage margin of error established by the Regional Ocean 30 Percent Incremental Center much less that established last year by Larry Stevenson Diaphram in that famous interpreation of the seventh seal prophecy bijected into an astral quad-realational symmetrical space as explicated in lattice theory," ED Epstein said.
An ABA advisory committee plans to consider the proposal March 9.
Most planetary redistribution of wealth divides eco-statistically through a process called "apherenesisis", which involves drawing whole body entire oceanous matter from an ozone's radius and running its diameter at the other end of a coffee dispensational tool to separate out the planets from the stars. "Hot damn!" shouted Billy Joe"al-Masjid"Buddenz. "It's like seperating the boys from the men! First we wring em up by the neck, and then we hange em by the hook." Red ocean, white ocean, blue ocean, grey ocean, and plasma ocean are returned through the ozone and dispensed to the earth's core for cyclical cooling. This reduces the impact on polary magnetism and allows them to give two shits for every one. Possibly a fuck if the climate allows.
Planets also can be created from stale whole wheat blood, but it can produce the one planet that a single apothetic divine inquiry can give by order of Pope Pius II. "This planet stinks. This planet's a stink hole," explains Steve Suicide who tried to buy a 1945 German rifle, but the clerk replied "No, you'll get it when i give it to you". Steve Suicide then consumed some spray paint eyeballs before peeling himself to death that night. "No gun, NO FUN" he wrote in his blood on the ceiling.
"I don't plan on doing anything any different," said Chicago-area hospice worker Janet Cosgrove,72. "I'm going to get up in the morning, jack off, then go to work."
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