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Do men like to be hit on?

AFeedz said:
Agreed.

And the theory doesn't make sense anyways. You want something simple so you go after a married man? Sounds like a complicated situation to me. in what world is dating a married man ever simple and drama/issue-free for any real amount of time?

Plenty of single men will hit it and throw her to the side, if that's what she's looking for.
Click to expand...

now we are talking the same language! Great post
 
AFeedz said:
Agreed.

And the theory doesn't make sense anyways. You want something simple so you go after a married man? Sounds like a complicated situation to me. in what world is dating a married man ever simple and drama/issue-free for any real amount of time?

Plenty of single men will hit it and throw her to the side, if that's what she's looking for.
Click to expand...

Wait...are you saying you don't like married men??
 
blueta2 said:
now we are talking the same language! Great post
Click to expand...

I was never pro-cheating. I've never cheated, but have been cheated on.

I was just pointing out that it did work out for some people here, just for the sake of argument with SD.
 
I like when strange women press themselves tight against me, pull down their top to expose cleavage and say, "Want me to be your girlfriend? I'll do anything you want."
 
nydj66 said:
I like when strange women press themselves tight against me, pull down their top to expose cleavage and say, "Want me to be your girlfriend? I'll do anything you want."
Click to expand...

Fuck yea. I would let her be my gf for the night.
 
if by "hit on" you mean walking up to me, completely unsolicited, dropping to your knees, unzipping my fly, pulling out little digimon and blowing me??? then, yes...i'm a big proponent.
 
AFeedz said:
It's easy to start NSA, it just never stays that way.
Click to expand...

Ive had a NSA booty call that lasted on and off for over a decade, and some that lasted several years on their own, still nothing but NSA.
Once again, it might start NSA but never stay that way with you[i/], you got the magic vag or something.
 
-SD- said:
Ive had a NSA booty call that lasted on and off for over a decade, and some that lasted several years on their own, still nothing but NSA.
Once again, it might start NSA but never stay that way with you[i/], you got the magic vag or something.
Click to expand...


I've definitely been the one to catch feelings before too.
 
by the way, my last ex was a friend with benefits and we both developed feelings. FWB never works! Him and I were just too different, but the sex was the best we ever had and we cared a lot for each other, but in the end, it was not going to work.
I wish him well and love him...even though he was a mess.
 
oh ok....yeah NSA never works unless your void of all emotions and some people are. When I have sex with a guy, I have to really like him.
Though I've had a few one nighters, but it sucked
 
i know hey! Blue how have you been???
 
theoak01 said:
thats because they werent with me:qt::rose:
Click to expand...

perhaps, but I am pretty sensual, and most guys are not. Though you do have all that pent up energy from the fact that you and your wife are not sexual.


Ebony, yeah, you liked that pick up line? hahah
 
blueta2 said:
perhaps, but I am pretty sensual, and most guys are not. Though you do have all that pent up energy from the fact that you and your wife are not sexual.


Ebony, yeah, you liked that pick up line? hahah
Click to expand...

I don't know if I'm sensual; but I'm extremely creative...and daring.
 
blueta2 said:
Ebony, yeah, you liked that pick up line? hahah
Click to expand...

I do! Definitely go for it irl. I think its sexy, that a woman takes charge goes after what she likes. men just don't know how to say no most of the time anyways which might make it easier.
 
ok, so update! There is a guy I know, and we have mutual friends on FB.
I've never met him, but always thought he was cute...

Found out he's single again, as am I, so I msg'ed him because my friend and I are going to flip a home and he does that, So my move was to ask him about flipping.
He replied very polite, then I flirted a little, then he flirted a little, then, the flirting kept back and forth, so I said "txt me sometimes"
He was so into it.
This week we were txting and being sweet, then we agreed to chat on the tel, said he was going to call me 2 night ago, and never called???

Now what is that about?
 
maybe he read this thread and sees you are not into nsa

cause you're a hot lady so im lost otherwise
 
blueta2 said:
ok, so update! There is a guy I know, and we have mutual friends on FB.
I've never met him, but always thought he was cute...

Found out he's single again, as am I, so I msg'ed him because my friend and I are going to flip a home and he does that, So my move was to ask him about flipping.
He replied very polite, then I flirted a little, then he flirted a little, then, the flirting kept back and forth, so I said "txt me sometimes"
He was so into it.
This week we were txting and being sweet, then we agreed to chat on the tel, said he was going to call me 2 night ago, and never called???

Now what is that about?
Click to expand...


Did you suggest the phone chat or did he?
 
blueta2 said:
ok, so update! There is a guy I know, and we have mutual friends on FB.
I've never met him, but always thought he was cute...

Found out he's single again, as am I, so I msg'ed him because my friend and I are going to flip a home and he does that, So my move was to ask him about flipping.
He replied very polite, then I flirted a little, then he flirted a little, then, the flirting kept back and forth, so I said "txt me sometimes"
He was so into it.
This week we were txting and being sweet, then we agreed to chat on the tel, said he was going to call me 2 night ago, and never called???

Now what is that about?
Click to expand...

OMG you're missing all juicy details! HOW did you flirt? was it intense, uncomfortable level or lighthearted fun. so just just txting and FB so far? you get a good vibe from him? maybe he forgot to call or maybe he is a potential douche.

OMG, I feel like im in HS again!! :D
 
Meh. I doubt he thought through whether or not to call.

Girls are difficult because we think through all our actions in detail to a fault. If we're not calling when we said we would, it's a safe bet we have a good reason and we know what we're doing to whoever we aren't calling.

Guys are simple. If he didn't call at that moment and said he would, he was probably just busy or didn't feel like it right at that moment and really didn't think through how it might affect you or not. He probably didn't think twice about it because he'd figure there's no difference between calling you later or calling you at that moment.
 
cindylou said:
Did you suggest the phone chat or did he?
Click to expand...

well we were going back and forth with so many questions, so I said "maybe we should talk on the phone" and he replied only 2 hr later saying "are you still up, we can chat"

I fell asleep so next day said "we can chat tonight" and I said "sure txt me first and I will make sure I am free" and then nothing.....chirp chirp
 
*ebony* said:
OMG you're missing all juicy details! HOW did you flirt? was it intense, uncomfortable level or lighthearted fun. so just just txting and FB so far? you get a good vibe from him? maybe he forgot to call or maybe he is a potential douche.

OMG, I feel like im in HS again!! :D
Click to expand...

hahaha.....so nice of you to get excited for me :)

Well he asked what I was up to, told him I was in my pool, he said "need a pool boy". I said "sure"
He told me I live close to where his Mom lives and he said "I go visit her often too ;-) " with the wink
it was really easy, smooth and friendly.
The vibe was really cool.
Yes maybe he did forget, but I doubt it, I mean if a man likes a woman, he doesn't forget.
 
AFeedz said:
Meh. I doubt he thought through whether or not to call.

Girls are difficult because we think through all our actions in detail to a fault. If we're not calling when we said we would, it's a safe bet we have a good reason and we know what we're doing to whoever we aren't calling.

Guys are simple. If he didn't call at that moment and said he would, he was probably just busy or didn't feel like it right at that moment and really didn't think through how it might affect you or not. He probably didn't think twice about it because he'd figure there's no difference between calling you later or calling you at that moment.
Click to expand...

Could be and I am pretty zen and rational when it comes to this, but just seems odd.
If a guy like a girl, he will secure his place.

Maybe I am just being a girl ;-)
 
AFeedz said:
Guys are simple. If he didn't call at that moment and said he would, he was probably just busy or didn't feel like it right at that moment and really didn't think through how it might affect you or not. He probably didn't think twice about it because he'd figure there's no difference between calling you later or calling you at that moment.
Click to expand...


Unfortunately there's more than a kernel of truth to this statement. The contemporary male primate mind is easily sidetracked. The night he was supposed to call blue he was probably thinking there's something i was supposed to do tonight...but then some cleavage flashed on the tv screen or since this is Canada there might have been a Gordy Howe documentary on that he's seen 13 times but no matter. :whatever:
 
blueta2 said:
I hate games! He lost :-)
Click to expand...


yep, all that needs to be said. The problem is if you talk to him when he eventually calls, then you'll validate his games. And the dynamic is set for the duration of the relathionship. I really do beleive it starts that early.
 
I won't put too much stock in this. If he txt me back, I will be polite, but no chance I would talk to him on the tel.
Now, if I do get to flip a house, then yes, I will talk to him since he's an awesome renovator, so won't burn any bridges.
He's nice, he was just not into me
 
blueta2 said:
I won't put too much stock in this. If he txt me back, I will be polite, but no chance I would talk to him on the tel.
Now, if I do get to flip a house, then yes, I will talk to him since he's an awesome renovator, so won't burn any bridges.
He's nice, he was just not into me
Click to expand...

Well, it's been a few days now so who knows where this went...

But it's possible he's just shy or depressed. E-flirting is so much easier because you have time to think of a come-back. Moving to a real conversation is a big step up and there are plenty of people these days who are more comfortable with technology than with real people.

I am usually great in spontaneous conversations; but when I'm in a funk, it can seem like a lot of effort.
 
I never heard back from him, so whatever the reason, it's all good. Could be anything, but I know I am cool enough that if I tell someone i'm going to do something and can't, I let them know. He lost major points.

So there is this guy who found me on FB, because we have many mutual friends. We had some back and forth on msg'es this morning and he is going to try to promote my business (he works in radio) and we went on and on. I said "Ok well thanks, have a great day" and his reply was "Ok a loaded question, how about i take you our for a coffee, drink or water?"
My reply "I'll see, if I do, it's as a friend only because not ready to date really"
He said "cool, I suck at dating, but you seem so amazing, would love to meet you in person"
Then find out he lives 5 blocks away.

He's really good looking, so I'm assuming he's bad news and again, he hit on me!

Opinions?
 
5 blocks?......throw on a trench coat and heels with absolutely nothing but your birthday suit underneath, show up and ring the bell and when he answers flash him. You will dating him in no time.
 
blueta2 said:
I never heard back from him, so whatever the reason, it's all good. Could be anything, but I know I am cool enough that if I tell someone i'm going to do something and can't, I let them know. He lost major points.

So there is this guy who found me on FB, because we have many mutual friends. We had some back and forth on msg'es this morning and he is going to try to promote my business (he works in radio) and we went on and on. I said "Ok well thanks, have a great day" and his reply was "Ok a loaded question, how about i take you our for a coffee, drink or water?"
My reply "I'll see, if I do, it's as a friend only because not ready to date really"
He said "cool, I suck at dating, but you seem so amazing, would love to meet you in person"
Then find out he lives 5 blocks away.

He's really good looking, so I'm assuming he's bad news and again, he hit on me!

Opinions?
Click to expand...

why is it bad news that he's good looking?? or bad news that he hit on you.. just tell him you are into woman now and see if he continues the "friendship" thing..:rainbow:
 
blueta2 said:
I never heard back from him, so whatever the reason, it's all good. Could be anything, but I know I am cool enough that if I tell someone i'm going to do something and can't, I let them know. He lost major points.

So there is this guy who found me on FB, because we have many mutual friends. We had some back and forth on msg'es this morning and he is going to try to promote my business (he works in radio) and we went on and on. I said "Ok well thanks, have a great day" and his reply was "Ok a loaded question, how about i take you our for a coffee, drink or water?"
My reply "I'll see, if I do, it's as a friend only because not ready to date really"
He said "cool, I suck at dating, but you seem so amazing, would love to meet you in person"
Then find out he lives 5 blocks away.

He's really good looking, so I'm assuming he's bad news and again, he hit on me!

Opinions?
Click to expand...

give him a chance! Just dont' open up until he deserves it...have the qualifications in your head and don't be afraid to jump if he doesn't meet them. Only a certain awesome man of integrity can have your heart! :heart:
 
blueta2 said:
I never heard back from him, so whatever the reason, it's all good. Could be anything, but I know I am cool enough that if I tell someone i'm going to do something and can't, I let them know. He lost major points.

So there is this guy who found me on FB, because we have many mutual friends. We had some back and forth on msg'es this morning and he is going to try to promote my business (he works in radio) and we went on and on. I said "Ok well thanks, have a great day" and his reply was "Ok a loaded question, how about i take you our for a coffee, drink or water?"
My reply "I'll see, if I do, it's as a friend only because not ready to date really"
He said "cool, I suck at dating, but you seem so amazing, would love to meet you in person"
Then find out he lives 5 blocks away.

He's really good looking, so I'm assuming he's bad news and again, he hit on me!

Opinions?
Click to expand...


Gee, why on earth would you even give a good looking local guy a chance?:rolleyes: At least meet for a coffee and get a 'vibe' as to whether or not he might be a good person...it's just a beverage and conversation for God's sake.
 
redsamurai said:
5 blocks?......throw on a trench coat and heels with absolutely nothing but your birthday suit underneath, show up and ring the bell and when he answers flash him. You will dating him in no time.
Click to expand...

ummm, no! That's pretty desperate...hahah!

I work much slower than this
 
SpyWizard said:
why is it bad news that he's good looking?? or bad news that he hit on you.. just tell him you are into woman now and see if he continues the "friendship" thing..:rainbow:
Click to expand...

Cuz most good looking men are super insecure and like I said in the beginning of this thread, when they hit on me, they are usually bad news. If it's so easy to hit on me, then they hit on every girl
 
cindylou said:
give him a chance! Just dont' open up until he deserves it...have the qualifications in your head and don't be afraid to jump if he doesn't meet them. Only a certain awesome man of integrity can have your heart! :heart:
Click to expand...

I will see. We have many mutual friends it seems so will ask around about him even before I meet him.
I'm so done with bad men, I will need the FBI to interview my next potential BF ;-)
 
canadianhitman said:
Gee, why on earth would you even give a good looking local guy a chance?:rolleyes: At least meet for a coffee and get a 'vibe' as to whether or not he might be a good person...it's just a beverage and conversation for God's sake.
Click to expand...

I may....but it would be for wine, Pick would disown me if I drank coffee ;-)
 
blueta2 said:
ummm, no! That's pretty desperate...hahah!

I work much slower than this
Click to expand...


not desperate at all...it's taking control. :qt:

would be even more hilarious if as he's staring at you with his jaw on the floor you just tackle him back into his house/apt. Just be sure to reach back and close the door behind you so the cops don't get called by people walking by on the street. :lmao:
 
The only thing I see is that you said you were not ready to date really and you said that you just wanted to be friends. I hate using the word test, but it might be good test to see if he respects that boundary?

If you're not ready you're not ready. If you do end up liking him and wanting to give him a chance it may give the impression that you don't really mean what you say even though thats not the case.
 
redsamurai said:
not desperate at all...it's taking control. :qt:

would be even more hilarious if as he's staring at you with his jaw on the floor you just tackle him back into his house/apt. Just be sure to reach back and close the door behind you so the cops don't get called by people walking by on the street. :lmao:
Click to expand...

no way, no control here. This to me is loss of control banging someone you don't even know.
Control is having the respect of another, no?!

Would you really respect some women who did this? I mean yes, you would love it, but would you really respect her?
 
cindylou said:
The only thing I see is that you said you were not ready to date really and you said that you just wanted to be friends. I hate using the word test, but it might be good test to see if he respects that boundary?

If you're not ready you're not ready. If you do end up liking him and wanting to give him a chance it may give the impression that you don't really mean what you say even though thats not the case.
Click to expand...

hmmm, yes good point about the test.

Not ready yet for sure
 
blueta2 said:
no way, no control here. This to me is loss of control banging someone you don't even know.
Control is having the respect of another, no?!

Would you really respect some women who did this? I mean yes, you would love it, but would you really respect her?
Click to expand...


I guess it would depend. If i had an inkling she was doing this to any guy that passed her by on the street no....but it would be a gas you have to admit. I just want to find someone spontaneous and alive like that. Not necessarily the tackling and taking right there on the doorstep....although that would be sweet later on in the relationship. Just someone who likes to step out of the norm like that and go flash the guy then leave. :lmao: Everyone is so dirt nap boring anymore.
 
redsamurai said:
I guess it would depend. If i had an inkling she was doing this to any guy that passed her by on the street no....but it would be a gas you have to admit. I just want to find someone spontaneous and alive like that. Not necessarily the tackling and taking right there on the doorstep....although that would be sweet later on in the relationship. Just someone who likes to step out of the norm like that and go flash the guy then leave. :lmao: Everyone is so dirt nap boring anymore.
Click to expand...

I do this when I am already in a relationship
 
blueta2 said:
So there is this guy who found me on FB, because we have many mutual friends. We had some back and forth on msg'es this morning and he is going to try to promote my business (he works in radio) and we went on and on. I said "Ok well thanks, have a great day" and his reply was "Ok a loaded question, how about i take you our for a coffee, drink or water?"
My reply "I'll see, if I do, it's as a friend only because not ready to date really"
He said "cool, I suck at dating, but you seem so amazing, would love to meet you in person"
Then find out he lives 5 blocks away.

He's really good looking, so I'm assuming he's bad news and again, he hit on me!

Opinions?
Click to expand...

My opinion...

You should consider becoming the "other woman" for a handsome man from the States.
 
Lots of overthinking with this shit. If you like someone go out with them. If you stil like them, go out again.
Dont powertrip by stating upfront "Im not ready to date so youre just gonna be a friend". If you can sense his intentions are to date then just dont go out.
You dont know, you might like him, then you will look like an idiot when you act like you want to "date"
 
-SD- said:
Lots of overthinking with this shit. If you like someone go out with them. If you stil like them, go out again.
Dont powertrip by stating upfront "Im not ready to date so youre just gonna be a friend". If you can sense his intentions are to date then just dont go out.
You dont know, you might like him, then you will look like an idiot when you act like you want to "date"
Click to expand...

what???

No way its that simple bro. That would mean throw the test and questionnaire out the window
 
-SD- said:
Lots of overthinking with this shit. If you like someone go out with them. If you stil like them, go out again.
Dont powertrip by stating upfront "Im not ready to date so youre just gonna be a friend". If you can sense his intentions are to date then just dont go out.
You dont know, you might like him, then you will look like an idiot when you act like you want to "date"
Click to expand...

not that easy.....people over 40 are fucking complicated.

I also found out he's a heavy drinker, so I will not even meet him as a friend.
I will never have an addict or even a recovering addict around me again
 
True blue. Plus, your overthinking will protect you. Maybe one day you won't have to over think things but I think now its good to be vigilant. <3 Probably can't be helped...didn't you say you have PTSD? Yeah, you're gonna over think things. <3
 
Yes PTSD diagnosed in 2010. I never over thought anything years ago, but now, I do!

I'm actually starting a Mindful Meditation course next week with an awesome teacher who was (is) a psychologist for 30 yrs. I take the course, then get certified to teach it to my clients.
This form of meditation will help me not over think and listen more to my gut. My mind drowns out my instinct some days.
 
I don't really agree with you ladies. Overthinking can keep you closed off and you can miss out on the good things. Not to say you shouldn't proceed with some caution, but too much is nothing but fear.

I talked to Blue Shirt first, then we had some phone convos that went well. We had a great first date filled with some inappropriate behavior. (what can I say...I have never been kissed like that). I made no apologies and didn't worry he was thinking I was easy. I just went with my gut and did what I wanted with no apologies.

It's been 7 months now and I got a guy that makes me breakfast, washes my clothes, takes care of me when I'm sick, he even opens doors for me every time we go somewhere. I'm pretty happy


So to hell with over thinking. :)
 
just...v said:
I don't really agree with you ladies. Overthinking can keep you closed off and you can miss out on the good things. Not to say you shouldn't proceed with some caution, but too much is nothing but fear.

I talked to Blue Shirt first, then we had some phone convos that went well. We had a great first date filled with some inappropriate behavior. (what can I say...I have never been kissed like that). I made no apologies and didn't worry he was thinking I was easy. I just went with my gut and did what I wanted with no apologies.

It's been 7 months now and I got a guy that makes me breakfast, washes my clothes, takes care of me when I'm sick, he even opens doors for me every time we go somewhere. I'm pretty happy


So to hell with over thinking. :)
Click to expand...

No, you're right and blue is trying to do the same. I don't really know how to be any different though. It would take a lot of work for me to get out of my head and feel my way through life instead of thinking through it, probably why I fight tooth and nail to justify staying in my head like that. Lol.
 
cindylou said:
No, you're right and blue is trying to do the same. I don't really know how to be any different though. It would take a lot of work for me to get out of my head and feel my way through life instead of thinking through it, probably why I fight tooth and nail to justify staying in my head like that. Lol.
Click to expand...

It's not easy, I know. It took some nerve for me to walk up to my Tshirt guy. I just went with the flow and didn't have any expectations. That way I wouldn't be disappointed...and I wasn't.
 
And I think Blue made the right decision about the FB guy. I'm not saying not to pay attention to the red flags. They are there for a reason. I had a series of unfortunate first dates before I settled on Mr. Blue Shirt.
 
just...v said:
And I think Blue made the right decision about the FB guy. I'm not saying not to pay attention to the red flags. They are there for a reason. I had a series of unfortunate first dates before I settled on Mr. Blue Shirt.
Click to expand...


You have him washing your clothes? :faint:
 
My overthinking generally comes when I'm not listening to my gut and trying to rationalize what usually turns out to be a bad decision. Not always but often.
 
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