The Mirror DOES Lie To Me....

[Friscochick]

Like Frisco said, can W6 or someone else give some suggestions as to how to handle the obsessive nature of the sport?

Quoting W6 here:

"Along the same theme of obsessions. I was thinking of some of the recent threads of how some of you have run yourself into the ground with training obsessively in hopes of a positive outcome. However, the outcome was......NEGATIVE...."

I know I had a negative experience with overtraining and injuring myself, but it's such a learning process we have to go through to figure out what's right for each of us independently. I would NOT go so far as to say that the outcome was negative! Frustrating, yes, but in the bigger scope of things I've made more positive changes to my body than negatives. I now know what the word "overtraining" means and will avoid it from now on. It caused a physical setback which in turn caused emotional turmoil.

Does obsessing make life less or more complicated? Obviously it makes life more complicated, but if I skip a work out, if I eat that cookie, if I fail to look in that mirror and see reality, then I will fail. Each little thing adds up, it's all cumulative. Just one turns into two and before you know it, everything's out of wack. Without the constant badgering going on inside my own head, I'd go off track, this I know from past experience.

I do this for ME. Not for other people and not because I care about how others view me. Everyone that I care about loved me when I was fat, and I don't care what strangers think of me. I'm not in it to compete, I simply want to feel good about what I see in the damn mirror and in order for that to happen, it takes some serious dedication to change the body I've had for so long. After nearly 2 yrs of working at it, I'm not tired of it at all, I love it, I enjoy the way I feel by eating clean and excercising and I plan to continue this way. I know that when I take a week off, I don't feel well, I'm sluggish, my mind isn't as focussed, and I gain weight rather quickly. If I take one week off from strict eating (not pigging out, but more like 2 or 3 cheat meals a week instead of just one) and lifting, I gain a quick 5 lbs. and it's not all water unfortunately. I don't obsess over the numbers on the scale but I do use them to see my progress. I've been hovering between 140 and 145 since last summer but the bf keeps dropping, clothes keep getting bigger, so I know I'm on the right track. Right now the scale is saying 150.6 and I'm retaining some water (a few days ago it was at 154.5 but I used a diruetic to help manage some the PMS bloat and more will come off naturally in a few days). So, in the past month I've probably added about 5 lbs of fat due to injury and illness making me stop lifting...I'm back in the gym for the 2nd week now and today was the first day I felt like I was getting back to the former me and I walked out smiling and called my husband to share the good news.

Fawnmarie...I hear ya on the missing cooking part! I'm an awesome cook and now I eat grilled chicken and burgers and canned salmon and chicken most of the time. Grrrrrrrr! I just got back from spending a week at my best friend's house and she asked me to cook some of my old dishes for her and her family. It was soooo enjoyable! Both the cooking and seeing everyone enjoy my food. I grew up surrounded by Italians in New York and food was a major part of daily life. I guess it was about 2 months ago that I decided to try to get more creative in my healthy cooking and although it's not as enjoyable as the old days, I've figured ways to find a middleground, make up some new dishes and still keep the meals healthy. I've even figured out how to make Chinese chicken fried rice in a healthy way using brown rice. Just mess around with the stuff you know you can have, mix up ingreedients, look for new stuff at the grocery store, you might be surprised.

hmmm.. good post P baby! Question, what do you use for the bloating? i'M CURIOUS TO KNOW SINCE I HAVE THIS SAME PROBLEM! That would be a great help!

Frisco

 

[Puddles]

Frisco, normally I don't use anything for bloating as I know it'll go away in a few days. This month was an exception and it became uncomfortable to simply make a fist, so I took a prescription diuretic that my father gave me. He's got serious health issues that dictate the use of diuretics. Dandelion root is supposed to be good for keeping your water retention in check, and I know that asparagus is a good diuretic. I used the Dandelion root when I was on cycle and never experienced any serious bloating.

W6, I agree that there are more serious issues in the world than the ones we're complaining about and I know how fortunate I am but I am an American, therefore I have had the opportunity to better my life and I choose to do so but sometimes I'm gonna get pissy about it when I'm struggling, especially now when I'm PMS'ing. My current emotions are way outta wack and I will go from smiling and cheerful to near sobbing or strong anger at the drop of a hat. I deal with this monthly and it really sucks. I'm usually a very positive person and I tend to keep my pissy moods to myself but this thread is a good place to do some venting and sharing with other women who are either feeling the same way or who have some good ideas on how to help. It helps to know that you're not alone.

As for “getting over something and moving on,” that's easy to do in some situations such as a job loss, a car accident, a failed test, but not this one. It's a constant battle and it will be for the rest of our lives. It may not be an important battle to anyone else, but it is to us.

 

[Friscochick]

Frisco, normally I don't use anything for bloating as I know it'll go away in a few days. This month was an exception and it became uncomfortable to simply make a fist, so I took a prescription diuretic that my father gave me. He's got serious health issues that dictate the use of diuretics. Dandelion root is supposed to be good for keeping your water retention in check, and I know that asparagus is a good diuretic. I used the Dandelion root when I was on cycle and never experienced any serious bloating.

W6, I agree that there are more serious issues in the world than the ones we're complaining about and I know how fortunate I am but I am an American, therefore I have had the opportunity to better my life and I choose to do so but sometimes I'm gonna get pissy about it when I'm struggling, especially now when I'm PMS'ing. My current emotions are way outta wack and I will go from smiling and cheerful to near sobbing or strong anger at the drop of a hat. I deal with this monthly and it really sucks. I'm usually a very positive person and I tend to keep my pissy moods to myself but this thread is a good place to do some venting and sharing with other women who are either feeling the same way or who have some good ideas on how to help. It helps to know that you're not alone.

As for “getting over something and moving on,” that's easy to do in some situations such as a job loss, a car accident, a failed test, but not this one. It's a constant battle and it will be for the rest of our lives. It may not be an important battle to anyone else, but it is to us.

You are soooo right my love! So where do you get dandelionroot?? Never heard of taking it??

 

[newgirl-chargeback]

MrsPuddles you wrote:

"As for “getting over something and moving on,” that's easy to do in some situations such as a job loss, a car accident, a failed test, but not this one. It's a constant battle and it will be for the rest of our lives. It may not be an important battle to anyone else, but it is to us."


I happen to agree. And I agree with W6 as well. While other countries do have situations of grave nature and I am sympathetic and compassionate to those and while I am the first to agree that we as Americans are spoiled and take what we have for granted....I also will not downplay the stress to achieve and be and succeed that has driven this country for centuries. It is inherent to our culture and our way of life -- it is WHAT we know.

Part of me accepts W6 comments and nods my head in agreement. But the cold harsh reality is, we are all working toward fitness and physical perfection (each person of course going towards their own genetic perfection).....and to say it is not a big deal takes the wind out of the sail, so to speak.

To say we have other more important worries while true, is almost irrelevant. I sincerely doubt there is ONE person on this board who can honestly say, it is no big deal -- "just another lift I could not do today at the gym" or "just another 5 lbs of love handles to work off". It is most certainly ludricous.

If that were the case, there would be no competitive spirit -- there would be no reason for it -- whether in a competition or against oneself.

We do what we do not for the nobility of being just healthy.....there is a visual factor attached. And since we are visually stimulated as a culture...at times it can affect even the most worldly and well rounded individual.

To work sooo hard at something and to have all the work produce no results -- whether in school, at work, in relationships OR even in one's appearance or fitness goals -- is frustrating no matter how you slice it. There is not a person on this board who has not pushed his/her limits to achieve their own level of greatness.

We are just venting. Now -- do I go to bed depressed and feel like I do not want to get out of bed -- NOT ME. There is not a morning that I wake up and thank god that I am awake (especially after my brush on 9/11). Does it annoy me when I cannot squat what I want YEP....or where the jeans I like -- YEP -- or get my delts to pop -- YEP. Does it define who I am , NOPE.

 

[Friscochick]

We are just venting. Now -- do I go to bed depressed and feel like I do not want to get out of bed -- NOT ME. There is not a morning that I wake up and thank god that I am awake (especially after my brush on 9/11). Does it annoy me when I cannot squat what I want YEP....or where the jeans I like -- YEP -- or get my delts to pop -- YEP. Does it define who I am , NOPE. [/B][/QUOTE]

haha like that! Short but sweet! ok guys i need to know where to get a good diaretic or something to help with bloat, besides dandelion , is there anything else.. and where can i get this stuff? I'm eager!

 

[newgirl-chargeback]

Dandelion root can be found at any health food store or drug store. For it to be effective you really need to drink tons of water too.....otherwise it does nothing.

I get only minimal relief from it (I have not had a period in months so it is not PMS bloat I suffer from).

 

[Friscochick]

Dandelion root can be found at any health food store or drug store. For it to be effective you really need to drink tons of water too.....otherwise it does nothing.

I get only minimal relief from it (I have not had a period in months so it is not PMS bloat I suffer from).

Thanks for the advice

 

[valerie]

Hi all interesting discussion here.

I too use to obsess on all this shit.

Life is too short to postpone happiness. I can assure you that it can not be found anywhere but in the present.

I have been down to single digit bodyfat, was I any happier -nope not one bit.

Eventually every one of you will find this for yourselves.

So look straight into the present moment and live for that. There is no where else.-valerie

 

[newgirl-chargeback]

WOW.....very truly WOW.

 

[MS]

Although what valerie and W6 have said is 100% the truth, it does not necessarily help folks who are not practiced at living in the here and now, or who have already developed compulsive or obsessive habits. I dunno how you can break those thought processes once thery're formed. It takes at least as much dedication and willpower (and knowledge and assistance) as dieting and getting to the gym every day. I was MUCH less happy when I was in the single digit %BF than I am now, and this realization is incredibly empowering when you come to accept that most folks are attracted to you for your personality rather than your body. To be healthy, happy and helpful are personality traits that cost you nothing (and pay off in the long run) and can be life-long gifts. To be lean, sexy and muscular is a transient state, and won't last for life unless you're planning on a young death. Set realistic goals for your body AND mind.

The poorest of the down trodden of the world prolly don't have easy access to mirrors, scales, glossy fashion mags, and they often walk around completely covered in baggy clothing 24/7. Western culture is not like that. But I find the best attitude I can adopt whenever I feel myself potentially getting stressed about something (anything really, my work, my body, my relationships, money...) is to ask myself "is this a life threatening situation which deserves a stress response"? The answer is ALMOST always no, and putting things in that perspective knocks evrything else into place and allows me to sleep well at night, which is when I grow new muscle and exercise my brain on a different level. Motivation and stress are not the same. I can be highly motivated to climb to the top of a steep hill with a heavy pack on my back, and this type of exertion undeniably elicits an acute stress response which is necessary to get up that hill. But it does not cause chronic mental or physical stress, and when I reach the top of that hill I can breathe a sigh of relief and move on to the next challenge without dwelling on how hard THAT hill was to climb, or how hard the NEXT hill will be to climb.

A book I highly recommend on this topic is: Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers: An Updated Guide to Stress, Stress-Related Diseases, and Coping by Robert M. Sapolsky.


Don't hold the title of some of his other books against this author ("The Trouble With Testosterone" wouldn't be a best seller on the anabolic's board, although it might strike a cord with a lot of the women around here LOL).