GoldenDelicious
New member
brr i went back and had a read of your posts (didnt read them before) and not that ive done a complete mini mental test on you, but youre depressed. the occasional 'bi polar' effects you alluded to earlier (that i assumed were medically diagnosed on behalf of a nother perosn, dont ask me why) seem more to be blips of happiness in a state of overall depression rather than bi-polarism.
anyway i think you should go to your doctor, have a chat with him about getting on some meds, and then have a chat with a counsellor, to learn to identify the triggers of the particulars of your circumstances that lead to poor feeling, negative thought patterns etc so that you can have more influence on your emotional state
personally ive been depressed. not "i dont feel like going to the carnival just now, ill meet you later" type depressed, i mean "im not leaving this room for the next 12 to 16 weeks here take my phone and phone charger i dont need the fucken thing *SLAM*" until there were cobwebs on my doorknob type depressed, and really, i wish i had used drugs. they give you a boost in the right direction, then you get off them. i mean really, if the difference in being depressed for 6 months versus 3 months is taking a white pill everyday, then you take the bloody pill
dont neglect going to a counsellor and sorting your brain out though. you learn to pick whats going wrong (and in your case, it seems to be a lot of disempowerment, because you dont have control over your son, some dissapointment/failure stuff over your relationship) and do whats neccessary to get over/minimise that (have realistic expectations, have more control over socail boundaries etc so that you can possibly form new relationships/get some closure, taht sort of thing)
that getting hit by car thing is pretty intense btw. personally i just sat there willing myself to die
(closes eyes "die! diiieee!! die dammit mother bastard!!!" *kicks wall* "fuck!! owww!! fuuuuccckkkk!!!@!")
anyway i think you should go to your doctor, have a chat with him about getting on some meds, and then have a chat with a counsellor, to learn to identify the triggers of the particulars of your circumstances that lead to poor feeling, negative thought patterns etc so that you can have more influence on your emotional state
personally ive been depressed. not "i dont feel like going to the carnival just now, ill meet you later" type depressed, i mean "im not leaving this room for the next 12 to 16 weeks here take my phone and phone charger i dont need the fucken thing *SLAM*" until there were cobwebs on my doorknob type depressed, and really, i wish i had used drugs. they give you a boost in the right direction, then you get off them. i mean really, if the difference in being depressed for 6 months versus 3 months is taking a white pill everyday, then you take the bloody pill
dont neglect going to a counsellor and sorting your brain out though. you learn to pick whats going wrong (and in your case, it seems to be a lot of disempowerment, because you dont have control over your son, some dissapointment/failure stuff over your relationship) and do whats neccessary to get over/minimise that (have realistic expectations, have more control over socail boundaries etc so that you can possibly form new relationships/get some closure, taht sort of thing)
that getting hit by car thing is pretty intense btw. personally i just sat there willing myself to die

(closes eyes "die! diiieee!! die dammit mother bastard!!!" *kicks wall* "fuck!! owww!! fuuuuccckkkk!!!@!")