What do you bring to the table?

[puddlemonkey]

So I found myself thinking about this the past few days as I continue to get pressure from my brother and sister in law about settling down. Not so much about myself, as I'm perfect , but rather the women I've dated the past 6 or 7 years. I went through them one by one and asked myself what would each girl bring to the table in a long term relationship? It seems like the same scenario time and time again. Maybe its the women I've associated myself with, but debt and mental instability came up repeatedly. And kids too, most women my age have a couple kids. Most of my friends refer to these women as DG (damaged goods), but personally I don't mind rug rats as long as mom can keep them under control. Am I suppose to be looking for anything in particular here? Is it wrong to view this in dollars and cents? Society tells us men to be good providers, which I can do, but when I'm brought up to see things in business terms its hard to want to adopt a bunch of dept I had nothing to do with. Where is the benefit to finding someone longterm? The only things I can see myself needing are better eating habits and a cleaner house. There are areas in my house I haven't dusted since '04. I just swept the kitchen and hardwoods yesterday and found some interesting things hiding in corners and behind appliances. And my eating habits, those seems to be worse when I am dating. Is it just me or when you guys date are you taking her out to restaurants 3-4 times a week? Do women even know how to cook now days, or is it just not as important as it use to be? Do you women ever ask yourself, "why would I make a good wife?" (no hate)


As for the rest of you, what the hell do you bring to the table? What makes you a good choice as a mate?

 

[binö]

this post is longer than all 22k of your mediocre posts combined.
and i bring a dashing sense of humor, good longevity gentetics, good convo and knowledge, a good smile and a decent twig and berries

 

[binö]

I also bring a morbid and partially homoerotic collection of gore-metal cds to the antique ivory table that my zillionaire brother gave to me

oollololololllolll

 

[puddlemonkey]

this post is longer than all 22k of your mediocre posts combined.

It just might be lol

 

[BlueBird]

I'm never getting married, so all I need do is please myself.

 

[Lestat]

large cock

 

[puddlemonkey]

large cock

pics please (no spartacus)

 

[puddlemonkey]

I also bring a morbid and partially homoerotic collection of gore-metal cds to the antique ivory table that my zillionaire brother gave to me

lol I don't like gore-metal, and I don't even own a kitchen table.

 

[puddlemonkey]

I'm never getting married, so all I need do is please myself.

Reasons?

 

[cindylou]

Hmmm - go to movies once a week, and only eat out once a week, and then rent a movie once a week or something. dont always eat out she probably appreciates it too because we are always watching our waistlines

i already make a good wife I think - but I think good qualities to look for in a woman is for her to be slightly conservative to others but not with you - frugal for the most part - every woman will have something she likes to buy to treat herself - but not stupid with money.

if you guys cant agree on money a marriage will never work so I think its a good idea to look at it in terms of dollars and cents.

I'm so rambling today my thoughts wont come together at all

 

[binö]

Reasons?

no suitors

 

[BlueBird]

Reasons?

Because I'm hi-strung and uncompromising...I know my flaws.

 

[BlueBird]

no suitors

Yep. Looking like Carla is painful

 

[puddlemonkey]

i already make a good wife I think - but I think good qualities to look for in a woman is for her to be slightly conservative to others but not with you - frugal for the most part - every woman will have something she likes to buy to treat herself - but not stupid with money.

That is pretty much every woman I've met though. Most openly admit it!


And I don't question you making a great wife

 

[puddlemonkey]

Because I'm hi-strung and uncompromising...I know my flaws.

Thats a plus right there.

 

[binö]

Yep. Looking like Carla is painful

even carla had drunken patrons try to tap it

 

[Razorguns]

Find a person that fits your standard.

Don't lower yourself to fit theirs.

Keep searching if you have to. I think there's like 6 billion people on the planet last time I counted.

r

 

[txbondsman]

if you asked my wife she'd say, he's a good Dad, but that's it.
But she's the one at home right now totally remodeling the house, rides around in a brand new Hummer, works 2 days a week, goes on vacation for weeks at a time, has no bills whatsoever, new clothes, house full of new furniture, jewelry, cooks occasionally, does only half the house work, rarely goes to the grocery, and she still is married to a guy who can't seem to get his shit together in her eyes...

humm..... so I guess I can't really think of anything. Somehow I have time to do all the above, run 2 businesses, coach baseball, do homework w/ our son, and play here, damn, I MUST be busy.....

 

[silverstar1025]

I don't think looking at someone's finances is fair. Lots of people have debt especially from student loans. What is importat is that they are ambitious, hard working, and have a good job. You don't want some lazy idiot that racks up debt.

As for me lets see the reasons my hubby loves me...

I work hard.
I have dreams.
I have a good job.
I am a good Mom.
I am not boring in the bedroom.
I am very giving and like to do sweet surprises for my family.
I am really good to talk to.
I like cars.

Do I need to continue?

 

[binö]

I don't think looking at someone's finances is fair. Lots of people have debt especially from student loans. What is importat is that they are ambitious, hard working, and have a good job. You don't want some lazy idiot that racks up debt.

As for me lets see the reasons my hubby loves me...

I work hard.
I have dreams.
I have a good job.
I am a good Mom.
I am not boring in the bedroom.
I am very giving and like to do sweet surprises for my family.
I am really good to talk to.
I like cars.
A fabulous pair of real (?) boobs.
A delictable pair of firm butt cheeks.

Do I need to continue?

fixed

 

[cindylou]

I don't think looking at someone's finances is fair. Lots of people have debt especially from student loans. What is importat is that they are ambitious, hard working, and have a good job. You don't want some lazy idiot that racks up debt.

As for me lets see the reasons my hubby loves me...

I work hard.
I have dreams.
I have a good job.
I am a good Mom.
I am not boring in the bedroom.
I am very giving and like to do sweet surprises for my family.
I am really good to talk to.
I like cars.

Do I need to continue?

if $$ is that important to Puddle - then he HAS to take it into consideration.

 

[puddlemonkey]

Find a person that fits your standard.

Don't lower yourself to fit theirs.

Keep searching if you have to. I think there's like 6 billion people on the planet last time I counted.

r

My father always says, "find your equal".

uh... dad, you've been alone for 20+ years.

 

[silverstar1025]

fixed

LMAO!! Well I was going for who I am as a person not my looks. Obviously hubby likes my body

 

[txbondsman]

I don't think looking at someone's finances is fair. Lots of people have debt especially from student loans. What is importat is that they are ambitious, hard working, and have a good job. You don't want some lazy idiot that racks up debt.

As for me lets see the reasons my hubby loves me...

I work hard.
I have dreams.
I have a good job.
I am a good Mom.
I am not boring in the bedroom.
I am very giving and like to do sweet surprises for my family.
I am really good to talk to.
I like cars.

Do I need to continue?

say somethiing else about sex, and include your tits in the story.....

 

[silverstar1025]

if $$ is that important to Puddle - then he HAS to take it into consideration.

Understandable, but like I said if they are hard working, etc then it shouldn't be a huge issue. Lots of people make the debt mistake when they are young or have to take loans to pay for school. It just depends on the situation. I mean if he met a college graduate that had a great job, but 20K in debt that she was working on paying off. He should not have a relationship because of it? It's not most fault that their parents didn't pay their way.

 

[silverstar1025]

say somethiing else about sex, and include your tits in the story.....

 

[cindylou]

Understandable, but like I said if they are hard working, etc then it shouldn't be a huge issue. Lots of people make the debt mistake when they are young or have to take loans to pay for school. It just depends on the situation. I mean if he met a college graduate that had a great job, but 20K in debt that she was working on paying off. He should not have a relationship because of it? It's not most fault that their parents didn't pay their way.

yeah student debt is totally understandable

 

[txbondsman]

whut!? I like your bewbs, I'm a bewb guy, what can I say!

 

[puddlemonkey]

if $$ is that important to Puddle - then he HAS to take it into consideration.

No, no, I wouldn't say its "important", but I don't see me excited to take on someones credit card debts because they couldn't control their spending. Or paying for a couple children because she made a horrible decision in picking the father of her children.

 

[binö]

i bring:
-a shitload of student debt
-a sense of entitlement
-an occiasonal bout with premature ejaculation
-a increasingly hairy back
-a bulbous pair of nutsicle
-an inflated sense of self-worth
-a never ending case of flatulence

 

[silverstar1025]

i bring:
-a shitload of student debt
-a sense of entitlement
-an occiasonal bout with premature ejaculation
-a increasingly hairy back
-a bulbous pair of nutsicle
-an inflated sense of self-worth
-a never ending case of flatulence

You are quite the catch!

 

[puddlemonkey]

i bring:
-a shitload of student debt
-a sense of entitlement
-an occiasonal bout with premature ejaculation
-a increasingly hairy back
-a bulbous pair of nutsicle
-an inflated sense of self-worth
-a never ending case of flatulence

So... you busy later?

 

[dps1822]

Hmmm thats a tough one...everyone has different tastes or some people mind things others dont like kids for instance. I have four...they all dont live with me but I am responsible for 4. The two older ones live with my parents because when i had them their father was a dead beat and my parents wanted me to finish college so since they cared for them while I was in school and working they got used to being there and have been ever since. The 4yr old is bi-polar like his dad and its hard for me to handle him so he lives with his dad and his grandma. I only have the two year old who is a helluva a kid he's funny.

I am a damn good cook...being that I am mexican they breed us to be slaves. LOL ok thats a joke but no seriously I cook,clean, iron do all that good stuff. I am however not subservient, I speak my mind if I feel the need too. I dont complain about much I have been through some shitty ass relationships and learned my lessons from there on when to pick your battles. Don't care if you have a night out with the guys just as long as you come home. LOL I have a buisness degree in marketing...it hasn't done much for me here in the city that I live in because its not a huge city, So i am back in school to earn my nursing degree. I don't depend on anyone, I am a team player, I'm fun to hang out with, I LOVE sports goooo RED SOX!!! hmmmm dont know what else to mention...man you have me nervous like I am on a first date. LOL

 

[bw1]

I'm never getting married, so all I need do is please myself.

 

[cindylou]

No, no, I wouldn't say its "important", but I don't see me excited to take on someones credit card debts because they couldn't control their spending. Or paying for a couple children because she made a horrible decision in picking the father of her children.

i agree with ya there - but as you get older the women are going to have kids from previous relationships.

but yeah on the credit cards. And maybe she had an emergency or something or maybe just wanted to take vacations or whatever - she can still pay them off.

but if she is using them to purchase one time wear only clothes for dates because she cant be seen in the same thing twice, RUN. That shit is only for debit cards. If she cant understand that.....i dunno ! lol

 

[binö]

So... you busy later?

 

[puddlemonkey]

i bring:
-a shitload of student debt
-a sense of entitlement
-an occiasonal bout with premature ejaculation
-a increasingly hairy back
-a bulbous pair of nutsicle
-an inflated sense of self-worth
-a never ending case of flatulence

I have noticed this with a few women. Everything seems to be... What are you buying me today? Where are you taking me today? What are you doing for me today? And we're not talking 10's either, it'll be like a 7 with a kid.

 

[binö]

I have noticed this with a few women. Everything seems to be... What are you buying me today? Where are you taking me today? What are you doing for me today? And we're not talking 10's either, it'll be like a 7 with a kid.

lol
mememememememmemeememeemmemeemmmemmemme!!!!
if it wasn't for having a sex drive i'd never communicate with wemmin outside my family

 

[dps1822]

I have noticed this with a few women. Everything seems to be... What are you buying me today? Where are you taking me today? What are you doing for me today? And we're not talking 10's either, it'll be like a 7 with a kid.

See i HATE women like that...no offense but I always say If you can't do for you then why should you expect anyone to do for you.

 

[silverstar1025]

lol
mememememememmemeememeemmemeemmmemmemme!!!!
if it wasn't for having a sex drive i'd never communicate with wemmin outside my family

lol well you could get hookers like Wulfgar or fleshlight like Puddle.

 

[binö]

lol well you could get hookers like Wulfgar or fleshlight like Puddle.

not a big fan of hookers
not fun knowing that they just are there cause of your coin.
much better when you earned it yourself

 

[puddlemonkey]

I am a damn good cook...being that I am mexican they breed us to be slaves. LOL ok thats a joke but no seriously I cook,clean, iron do all that good stuff. I am however not subservient, I speak my mind if I feel the need too. I dont complain about much I have been through some shitty ass relationships and learned my lessons from there on when to pick your battles. Don't care if you have a night out with the guys just as long as you come home. LOL I have a buisness degree in marketing...it hasn't done much for me here in the city that I live in because its not a huge city, So i am back in school to earn my nursing degree. I don't depend on anyone, I am a team player, I'm fun to hang out with, I LOVE sports goooo RED SOX!!! hmmmm dont know what else to mention...man you have me nervous like I am on a first date. LOL

You might want to keep that quiet for awhile, early enough in a relationship and that could be grounds for dumping to some guys.

 

[puddlemonkey]

i agree with ya there - but as you get older the women are going to have kids from previous relationships.

That seems to be an issue. Its usually one of two things, either the ex is nowhere to be found and the kids run rampant and she has zero control of them, or the ex is in the picture and the kids behave well but the ex is a pain in the ass and is always trying to cause problems with the new boyfriend.

 

[silverstar1025]

That seems to be an issue. Its usually one of two things, either the ex is nowhere to be found and the kids run rampant and she has zero control of them, or the ex is in the picture and the kids behave well but the ex is a pain in the ass and is always trying to cause problems with the new boyfriend.

Just turn

 

[BlueBird]

WTH? Did I miss the RWFC meeting?

 

[samoth]

As for the rest of you, what the hell do you bring to the table? What makes you a good choice as a mate?

I'm still trying to figure this one out... not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

By the way, excellent thread, Puddles. I read it twice thinking, "wtf, he couldn't have actually written all of that out, could he?"

 

[puddlemonkey]

WTH? Did I miss the RWFC meeting?

lol no, info is being sent to you in the mail regarding time and place.

 

[thelion2005]

So I found myself thinking about this the past few days as I continue to get pressure from my brother and sister in law about settling down. Not so much about myself, as I'm perfect , but rather the women I've dated the past 6 or 7 years. I went through them one by one and asked myself what would each girl bring to the table in a long term relationship? It seems like the same scenario time and time again. Maybe its the women I've associated myself with, but debt and mental instability came up repeatedly. And kids too, most women my age have a couple kids. Most of my friends refer to these women as DG (damaged goods), but personally I don't mind rug rats as long as mom can keep them under control. Am I suppose to be looking for anything in particular here? Is it wrong to view this in dollars and cents? Society tells us men to be good providers, which I can do, but when I'm brought up to see things in business terms its hard to want to adopt a bunch of dept I had nothing to do with. Where is the benefit to finding someone longterm? The only things I can see myself needing are better eating habits and a cleaner house. There are areas in my house I haven't dusted since '04. I just swept the kitchen and hardwoods yesterday and found some interesting things hiding in corners and behind appliances. And my eating habits, those seems to be worse when I am dating. Is it just me or when you guys date are you taking her out to restaurants 3-4 times a week? Do women even know how to cook now days, or is it just not as important as it use to be? Do you women ever ask yourself, "why would I make a good wife?" (no hate)


As for the rest of you, what the hell do you bring to the table? What makes you a good choice as a mate?

Money, position, virility, experience and wisdom.

I have the greatest luck with 20-29 year olds who are damaged by relationships with boys their own age. It doesn't last though ... I'm too old and really no fun. I'm devoting all my time to the new daughter and I'm overdue for a new romance.

 

[Bikini Mod]

Excellent thread...

Well I was one of those women who had a TRUCKLOAD of debt. Nope, not due to frivolous spending (what's that?) it was due to the divorce/custody nightmare with my INCREDIBLY POOR CHOICE of who I married and whom subsequently fathered my only children. (Which you all are well aware of by now).

I do completely understand your point of view. Hell, I knew how hard it was to find someone of substance (once I was ready) because regardless of all of my highly desirable qualities, that one HYUGE negative pretty much overshadowed the good stuff. Not to mention the fact that I haven't been healthy for a long time and highly doubt I ever will be again.

Anyways, what do I bring to the table?

I am smart, funny, creative, loyal, talented, proud, trustworhty, loving, kind, will kick your ass when you need it and hold your hand when you need that. I can cook and bake and clean but I told men upfront - I won't so don't ask. I am incredibly frugal as I was raised poor and was helping my parents run their business by 17.

When I feel well enough to get my freak on I enjoy my partner almost too much... (this has become a flaw as I deteriorate).

I work hard to be attractive for myself and for my partner. I have a great sense of style and flair and want always to be visually pleasing. For MOST MEN this is fairly important. If I haven't let myself go by 40 something, I certainly don't feel the need to start.

There is NO NEED to feel pressured to find a partner that is suitable.

Just think on it like this:

1. You HAVE to really Really REALLY like her, in other words you gotta enjoy her company in THE ABSENCE OF SEX.

2. You HAVE to have common life goals.

3. You should be kind, supportive to one another. It has to go both ways or it won't work.

4. If you rock each other's worlds sexually that is a bonus, but not mandatory. You can "learn" to rock each other's worlds over time as you get to know one another better. With a woman you need to start with her head and she must be visually (then mentally) appealing to you.

Ya'll have seen my husband and every day he gets a new ache or pain and he busts his ass every fucking day to deliver what he has promised me. He NEVER checked out on me, even when I checked out. I will never forsake him for this. <---- for this is a characteristic that is truly rare indeed. For me, there can be no other man.

I can't speak for him, but I believe this bolded statement is one of the qualities that I possess that he values most.

My husband is kind, loving, pure genius, charming, has character and integrity that is unparalelled and MY GOD does he know how to rock my world.... too well, in fact.

 

[puddlemonkey]

I'm devoting all my time to the new daughter and I'm overdue for a new romance.

How's that going by the way? I remember the original thread awhile back. Has the rest of the family started accepting her more, or is it still an issue?

 

[ceo]

It sucks, but you do have to go through a bunch of crazy bitches to find one good one. Gotta expand your options.

I view this like choosing a car to buy. There's some decent domestic models, but they usually never last. You can find some that are even VERY fun to drive (Vette, Viper, etc.), but when you're choosing one for the long term reliability factor...you go with an import.

Helps to find one with a good profession and higher education (doctor type - probably not lawyer).

Where are you finding all these wimmins? Why are you still looking there? I mean, of course IF you're really thinking about settling down someday. This is the first sign of any inclination I've seen from you ever in regards to the thought of possibly "settling down."

 

[puddlemonkey]

By the way, excellent thread, Puddles. I read it twice thinking, "wtf, he couldn't have actually written all of that out, could he?"

Its kinda jumbled, too many thoughts going through my head and I was typing it out. That and the phone kept ringing

 

[ceo]

As for what I bring to the table...shiiiiiat negro, that list is so long it would eat up too much bandwidth here and admin would delete your thread.

 

[puddlemonkey]

Well I was one of those women who had a TRUCKLOAD of debt. Nope, not due to frivolous spending (what's that?) it was due to the divorce/custody nightmare with my INCREDIBLY POOR CHOICE of who I married and whom subsequently fathered my only children. (Which you all are well aware of by now).

Thats another place debt will come from I didn't think about before. Divorce!

I can cook and bake and clean but I told men upfront - I won't so don't ask.

Ok, someone's going to ask so it might as well be me.... why?

 

[puddlemonkey]

I view this like choosing a car to buy. There's some decent domestic models, but they usually never last. You can find some that are even VERY fun to drive (Vette, Viper, etc.), but when you're choosing one for the long term reliability factor...you go with an import.

I'm usually first in line to rip on our women here, they can't all be bad can they?

This is the first sign of any inclination I've seen from you ever in regards to the thought of possibly "settling down."

It comes from the constant pressure of my brother, his wife and my mother. My father doesn't care if I marry or not. If anything he'd probably advise against it. My brother usually right about everything. Yes everything, been that way all our lives, pisses me off. But on this subject I don't think he realizes what I'm up against. He got lucky and has been with the same girl since they were ages 12 and 15. Not to mention they have no kids to deal with and she makes 6 figures. Those women aren't exactly a dime a dozen.

 

[Bikini Mod]

Thats another place debt will come from I didn't think about before. Divorce!



Ok, someone's going to ask so it might as well be me.... why?

Legitimate question.

With my first marriage I busted MY ASS, we are talking belly to the floor scrubbing on it while three little kids were tearing up the other end of the house. My kids were so spoiled that they would refuse to eat storebought cookies! Does that tell you anything about my abilities as one that can cook and clean?

I was raised to believe that a woman's value is dependent upon her ability to keep house, cook/bake and raise children... well for all of my work I got bubkus.

I was then lost as I NEVER wanted to remarry... I didn't have a clue what other value a "good wife" could have and I sure the shit was not about to go back to playing slave labor. On my own I cooked/cleaned and paid my own bills. So why then would I put up with a man's BS so I could have to cook clean more and get to keep less of the money I earned, not to mention give up my sexual freedom?

I then came to find that my value had naught to do with cooking OR cleaning as one can be paid to do that, nor did my value begin and end with what was between my legs.

My value came from my intellect and my heart (character)... those decided what type of mother/wife I was. So I would only give my time to those men who valued what I had to offer.

As I chose to date only men that were financially successful the issues of cooking/cleaning NEVER came up. LOL Not to mention, I would not be a good match for a man who WANTED his wife to perform these tasks.

It is all about knowing yourself and finding out your preference and what makes you happy... then not compromising that.

The Old Grump actually brags about how "I don't do shit"... heheheee every now and again some bubba gump in a bar will say, "Yea my old lady don't do shit neether." So I tell them how much shit I DONT do. They say, "Really, you don't even cook or clean... ever?" I say, "Nope." Then he is stunned when my husband tells him who does it. So then I correct that good ole boy (with a smile of course as Southern women have been known to do) by saying, "What you MEANT to say was that your old lady just don't get paid for all the shit she does!"

 

[ceo]

I'm usually first in line to rip on our women here, they can't all be bad can they?

Pretty much, yes. From my experiences, and most guys I know too. The really good, reliable domestic models are out there...but very rare, and usually require more maintenance.

It comes from the constant pressure of my brother, his wife and my mother. My father doesn't care if I marry or not. If anything he'd probably advise against it. My brother usually right about everything. Yes everything, been that way all our lives, pisses me off. But on this subject I don't think he realizes what I'm up against. He got lucky and has been with the same girl since they were ages 12 and 15. Not to mention they have no kids to deal with and she makes 6 figures. Those women aren't exactly a dime a dozen.

True. That's why I said doctors!!!!!

 

[habitualhealth]

I have noticed this with a few women. Everything seems to be... What are you buying me today? Where are you taking me today? What are you doing for me today? And we're not talking 10's either, it'll be like a 7 with a kid.

what are you buying me today? were are you taking me today? what are you doing for me today?



...good thing i'm an 11 with a kid huh?

 

[Paul7]

http://www.theanimationartgallery.com/getrandimg.php?gid=3012&group=chargroup

 

[puddlemonkey]

what are you buying me today? were are you taking me today? what are you doing for me today?



...good thing i'm an 11 with a kid huh?

I was thinking 12. But you're right, you do have that annoying habit of talking.

 

[habitualhealth]

there's not enough bandwidth for me to accurately answer this question....

 

[puddlemonkey]

http://www.theanimationartgallery.com/getrandimg.php?gid=3012&group=chargroup

Someone should put that on a shirt.

 

[habitualhealth]

As for what I bring to the table...shiiiiiat negro, that list is so long it would eat up too much bandwidth here and admin would delete your thread.

damn i should really start reading other peeps posts.





.....eh, nah

 

[puddlemonkey]

there's not enough bandwidth for me to accurately answer this question....

Not with your huge ass sig there isn't.

 

[velvett]

I seek, specify, order and have the table delivered.

So I bring the table.

 

[habitualhealth]

Not with your huge ass sig there isn't.

i learned it from watching you.

 

[puddlemonkey]

My value came from my intellect and my heart (character)... those decided what type of mother/wife I was. So I would only give my time to those men who valued what I had to offer.

As I chose to date only men that were financially successful the issues of cooking/cleaning NEVER came up. LOL Not to mention, I would not be a good match for a man who WANTED his wife to perform these tasks.

I'm half tempted to spam the board so you have to clean up after me

 

[puddlemonkey]

i learned it from watching you.

I was trying to teach you to be witty. But its ok, Rome wasn't built in a day.

 

[habitualhealth]

I seek, specify, order and have the table delivered.

So I bring the table.

you're pretty much the shat.

 

[Bikini Mod]

I'm half tempted to spam the board so you have to clean up after me

I don't have "mod powers" on THIS board.... so I am thinkin that job would fall to Stilleto.

Something tells me that this isn't the most desirable course of action for a man in your position.

 

[habitualhealth]

I was thinking 12. But you're right, you do have that annoying habit of talking.

aww i think it's time you replace jon with yourself in the club.

 

[gotmilk]

I brought some lobster tails with steamed shrimp, fresh pasta mixed with steamed vegetables to the table tonight.

One of my cats brought a broken whisker

 

[puddlemonkey]

I don't have "mod powers" on THIS board.... so I am thinkin that job would fall to Stilleto.

Something tells me that this isn't the most desirable course of action for a man in your position.

Definitely not gonna do it then. She wouldn't even clean it up I bet, she'd probably make me go back and do it

 

[Smurfy]

Any man I get with will have to bring cake to the table.

 

[puddlemonkey]

aww i think it's time you replace jon with yourself in the club.

I've already made jon cry once this week, I just can't away what little joy he has left.

 

[Bikini Mod]

Definitely not gonna do it then. She wouldn't even clean it up I bet, she'd probably make me go back and do it

Pretty much.

 

[puddlemonkey]

Any man I get with will have to bring cake to the table.

 

[Smurfy]

fuck that looks good

 

[Bikini Mod]

Any man I get with will have to bring cake to the table.

Will this do?

 

[Stefka]

I'm smart, funny, hard working, adventurous, low maintenance and pretty.

But I would be a crappy wife.

I am terrified of children.
I am going to be working insane hours for like the next 20 years.
I need a lot of alone time.
I can never stay in one place.
I have a lot of over-achiever goals that take precedence over relationship stuff.

 

[puddlemonkey]

But I would be a crappy wife.

I am terrified of children.
I am going to be working insane hours for like the next 20 years.
I need a lot of alone time.
I can never stay in one place.
I have a lot of over-achiever goals that take precedence over relationship stuff.

Some of those are huge pluses!

 

[Bikini Mod]

Some of those are huge pluses!

Actually yes, I do agree. It is all about what one is looking for in a mate.

Not all men WANT a cookie cutter "June Cleaver."

 

[samoth]

I'm smart, funny, hard working, adventurous, low maintenance and pretty.

But I would be a crappy wife.

I am terrified of children.
I am going to be working insane hours for like the next 20 years.
I need a lot of alone time.
I can never stay in one place.
I have a lot of over-achiever goals that take precedence over relationship stuff.

 

[Stefka]

Actually yes, I do agree. It is all about what one is looking for in a mate.

Not all men WANT a cookie cutter "June Cleaver."

Agreed, but I think a lot of men want their careers (and themselves) to be the main priority a the relationship. I've worked really hard and I'm actually looking forward to my career, and it is going to come first for a few years (or decades).
I just dont know if I would really bring anything to the table because I'm just never going to be home.

 

[Stefka]

 

[silverstar1025]

Have you guys already hooked up or just an e-romance?

 

[Bikini Mod]

Agreed, but I think a lot of men want their careers (and themselves) to be the main priority a the relationship. I've worked really hard and I'm actually looking forward to my career, and it is going to come first for a few years (or decades).
I just dont know if I would really bring anything to the table because I'm just never going to be home.

You are very self-aware, that is an excellent quality. Being home is not necessarily something that all men want or need.

 

[Stefka]

Have you guys already hooked up or just an e-romance?

Aren't we nosey

 

[jackangel]

they've already done mathematics together.

 

[silverstar1025]

Aren't we nosey

lol sorry just curious. You guys are like the lovebirds of ef

 

[GoldenDelicious]

there are a lot of issues in this post, and so im going to chop it up. hopefully after thinking about it for a bit, youll snap out of the coma youve been living in for the past 30 odd years (no offense)

So I found myself thinking about this the past few days as I continue to get pressure from my brother and sister in law about settling down. Not so much about myself, as I'm perfect , but rather the women I've dated the past 6 or 7 years.

a really important thing to ask yourself is WHY your sister/bro are pressuring you. do they really care about your happiness, or are they jsut a bit worried about you and just want you to do whatever society has taught you (however irrational) so that youre *safe* ...yet not neccessarily happy - so taht their worry goes away? (its usually a mix of both, but still, its an important idea for your autonomy)

I went through them one by one and asked myself what would each girl bring to the table in a long term relationship? It seems like the same scenario time and time again. Maybe its the women I've associated myself with, but debt and mental instability came up repeatedly. And kids too, most women my age have a couple kids.

it seems to me that youre a classic beta male provider/nurturer figure, and hence, you attract women who want a protector/provider. a logical extension of that is that the women who need the most protection/nurturing are the ones who are going to be most drawn to a man like that.

Most of my friends refer to these women as DG (damaged goods), but personally I don't mind rug rats as long as mom can keep them under control.

waht your friends think is irrelevent. the question you should ask yourself is, if you had teh choice, what would YOU choose - a woman who was single, without kids, without debt etc or a woman like the ones yours describing? do you truly have no preference, or is this "i dont mind" stuff jsut a story youre telling yourself, to convince yourself that you "really dont mind" ...when you do

Am I suppose to be looking for anything in particular here?

yeah. youre meant to be looking for this thing called "whatever YOU fucking want"

Is it wrong to view this in dollars and cents?

i wouldnt be asking if it was wrong, id be asking if it was clever, or logical. if you wrote up a list of all the attributes of a woman that YOU personally liked/wanted, how high on the list would "dollars and cents" stuff be? then the next question is - if there are many other important attributes...why are you focussing so hard on the financials? yorue looking for a simple solution to a complex problem

Society tells us men to be good providers, which I can do, but when I'm brought up to see things in business terms its hard to want to adopt a bunch of dept I had nothing to do with.

SOME parts of society tell men to be good providers. religion tells you that, and politicians tell you that, and your family tells you that, because for the most part, we're raised by women (few of whom know how to train an alpha male) and also, because the "provider/nurterer" role is SAFE. no one fears beta males. theyre benign by definition. they dont upset the status quo.

are you happy with this place in society? are you happy being treated this way by women (which at worst is being viewed as a meal ticket)?. is this what you would have CHOSEN for yourself if all other options were on the table?

Where is the benefit to finding someone longterm?

peopel generally benefit from being in a relationship. a little social interaction everyday is neccessary for good health. company keeps you in a good mood etc.

The only things I can see myself needing are better eating habits and a cleaner house. There are areas in my house I haven't dusted since '04. I just swept the kitchen and hardwoods yesterday and found some interesting things hiding in corners and behind appliances. And my eating habits, those seems to be worse when I am dating. Is it just me or when you guys date are you taking her out to restaurants 3-4 times a week? Do women even know how to cook now days, or is it just not as important as it use to be?

why is it a womans place to cook? the traditional "man provides, woman nurtures" model is dying. women are earning as much as men, so it follows then, that men whould be assuming more traditionally female roles (cooking, cleaning).

maybe the solution to your problem is to simply...stop being a lazy bastard, have some personal cleanliness standards, and do some cleaning by yourself.

As for the rest of you, what the hell do you bring to the table? What makes you a good choice as a mate?

me? im a terrible choice as a mate (at the moment), but:

im intelligent
im handsome
i have good social status (and rising)
i am very aware socially and hence a great social viber
i have a good sense of humour (which adds to my social compatibility)
im healthy

...and all that other provider stuff but its offset by the fact that i have a LOT of sexual choce at the moment, and so its risky for girls to be in relationships with me, because i can quite happily give them the boot and find a replacement in about...half a day.

so yah. some stuff to think about.

 

[puddlemonkey]

youre meant to be looking for this thing called "whatever YOU fucking want"

If thats the case I think I'm good sleeping with miscellaneous women and then when I get too old to score anymore I'll just get hookers.

What I want in a woman I don't think exists.

parts of society tell men to be good providers. religion tells you that, and politicians tell you that, and your family tells you that, because for the most part, we're raised by women

Them scandalous bishes!

why is it a womans place to cook?

Are you trying to get me killed? I never said that. At least not so bluntly. lol

the traditional "man provides, woman nurtures" model is dying. women are earning as much as men, so it follows then, that men whould be assuming more traditionally female roles (cooking, cleaning).

Thats all fine and dandy, but many women still expect the guy to fix the cars, mow the lawn, take out the trash, etc. Why should it be a one way street?

maybe the solution to your problem is to simply...stop being a lazy bastard, have some personal cleanliness standards, and do some cleaning by yourself.

Lazy? I own a 5 bedroom house on a acre of land. The simple fact that the house is still standing makes me think I'm doing pretty well! And I have to look after my rental too. I've been called a lot of things but never lazy! I'm a busy boy

 

[Pamela]

I try to put myself in the other persons shoes and think of how it would make them feel!

 

[puddlemonkey]

I try to put myself in the other persons shoes and think of how it would make them feel!

 

[GoldenDelicious]

If thats the case I think I'm good sleeping with miscellaneous women and then when I get too old to score anymore I'll just get hookers.

if thats what you want, then do it! (i know a lot of men who do this. usually they find a lady whose company they like at the same time, and have a loose/open relationship (ie a friendship taht turns into a sexship) but this way of doing stuff is viable

What I want in a woman I don't think exists.

write a list down of what you want, then get a woman that ticks off as many of those attributes as possible.

Them scandalous bishes!

therye not scandalous, theyre jsut women

Are you trying to get me killed? I never said that. At least not so bluntly. lol

who is going to kill you? some chick who doesnt like the idea that she has to reciprocate? if *im* using 90% of my time and effort to support a girl, then i want *her* to use 90% of her time to support me equally. if its *my* place to work and bring home the bacon, then its *her* place to shut up, cook, keep the house clean, and otherwise make both of our lives better

reciprocation is the glue that holds relationships together. if people dont reciprocate, relationships get very unhealthy. if a girl is too stupid, or brainwashed by femenism, or whatever bullshit that she doesnt understand this simple idea, then she has no business being in a relationship.

Thats all fine and dandy, but many women still expect the guy to fix the cars, mow the lawn, take out the trash, etc. Why should it be a one way street?

unless these things are part of your unspoken reciprocal relationship, then who gives a shit what they expect.

in todays society, women can get a job every bit as high paying as a man, and therefore, pay other people to do those things for them. car broken? take it to the mechanic. lawn need mowing? call a gardener. trash heavy? use smaller trashbags.

you get what you give, and tahts that.

Lazy? I own a 5 bedroom house on a acre of land. The simple fact that the house is still standing makes me think I'm doing pretty well! And I have to look after my rental too. I've been called a lot of things but never lazy! I'm a busy boy

youre one guy living in a house. doesnt matter how big the place is, its still only one persons mess.

 

[puddlemonkey]

youre one guy living in a house. doesnt matter how big the place is, its still only one persons mess.

I'm more than happy to invite you to do my acre of yard work if you'd like. Until you own a large lot you cannot comment on the subject!

 

[GoldenDelicious]

buy a goat. never mow anythign again.

 

[puddlemonkey]

buy a goat. never mow anythign again.

Funny you mention that. My father stopped by my house one day while I was at work and left a section of the classifieds on my door. He circled an ad that said, "free goat". I actually thought about it lol.

 

[FriendlyCanadian]

I bring an immense amount of awesomeness to any table

 

[puddlemonkey]

I bring an immense amount of awesomeness to any table

When are you gonna show us some of that awesomeness?