lesson in life: love yourself, learn to love yourself...if you can.

[PolishHammer1977]

Stand tall & proud in triumph or defeat

 

[HighIntensity]

You've just admitted that you've been a fake shell for quite some time. You should not be surprised if you lack self-respect or "love for thy self" how could you love something that doesn't even exist. You've been lying to yourself and therefore lying to othersi.

Think about all the people you pushed away from the fabricated you trying to be a macho tough guy, always up, always perfect. Then also consider those that will never trust you because how will they know if it is really you or just another fake?

Maybe when you can accept who you think you really are you will know just how many people deal with the very same challenges in life.

Nothing could be farther from the truth, I do not come across as fake to people. I have tons of friends that would die for me and I am very loyal. This is just about me being scared of someone realizing how vunarable I really am below the amour.

 

[HighIntensity]

Many, many years ago I was about the happiest person just to be alone. Never really would allow myself to get attached or involved in a serious relationship.

Well eventually I met this girl who no mater how hard I tried I couldn’t help falling for and we ended up getting married about 10 years ago. I wouldn’t change a thing about my wife. She is extremely loyal and very supportive of everything I do. She doesn’t care about material things, hell if we have a little extra money she would rather spend it on the kids or me then herself. She let me make trips to Vegas with friends, has no problem when I hang out with friends or spend hours a week in the gym, and she looks good as well . I could go on and on about her, but I wont bore you all.

Even having said all that I honestly still get angry and distant towards her from time to time. I do this because sometimes I think I am putting to much of my happiness in her hands now and get a bit scared because I know if it ended tomorrow I would have a very hard time being happy with myself on my own like I use to be. She can tell when I get in these moods but has no idea why, I just tell her I am under a lot of stress. She will do all she can to make me happier but when I am in this type of mood it just pushes me away more. This stuff has come and gone sence we got married and can last a week or a month. Usually happens when thing are at their best, I just start waiting for something to go wrong.

I feel at a disadvantage in the relationship because she had a few serious relationships before meeting me and knows how it feels to have love and lost. I on the other hand never allowed myself to get attached, things seem to get too serious I would bail out.

If I had to do it over I would not have been this way, I would have experienced what it is like to have someone special break things off with me. I think it would have made me a better stronger person in my relationships later in life.

Live life and get all the experiences you can good and bad, you will meet the right person and be a better happier person in the long run with no regrets. Trust me I know this to be true.

great post bro, I have had a couple loves in my life leave, and it is the worst pain I man can feel imop.

 

[Fonz]

You've just admitted that you've been a fake shell for quite some time. You should not be surprised if you lack self-respect or "love for thy self" how could you love something that doesn't even exist. You've been lying to yourself and therefore lying to othersi.

Think about all the people you pushed away from the fabricated you trying to be a macho tough guy, always up, always perfect. Then also consider those that will never trust you because how will they know if it is really you or just another fake?

Maybe when you can accept who you think you really are you will know just how many people deal with the very same challenges in life.

That was a bit cold Velvett.

Why do I get the impression you feel threatened by a macho male persona?

Care to elucidate the choir?

Fonz

 

[Nathan]

That was a bit cold Velvett.

Why do I get the impression you feel threatened by a macho male persona?

Care to elucidate the choir?

Fonz

I'm not gonna make out with you, no matter what you say, or how fervently you PRETEND to ignore me.

 

[Imakarum_Mirabilis]

I don't think she's threatened by machismo.

I think she's tired of poseurs.

 

[lucidblue]

great post bro, I have had a couple loves in my life leave, and it is the worst pain I man can feel imop.

I've only really been in love with one guy and when he left it was some of the worst pain I've ever felt in my life.

 

[Nathan]

I've only really been in love with one guy and when he left it was some of the worst pain I've ever felt in my life.

Can I get a "hell yeah!"?

 

[buttplug]

So now that you know what the problem is, how do you plan on fixing it?

 

[velvett]

Nothing could be farther from the truth, I do not come across as fake to people. I have tons of friends that would die for me and I am very loyal. This is just about me being scared of someone realizing how vunarable I really am below the amour.

Then I am confused. Earlier you posted the following:

I have spent the last seven years of my life perfecting an image of how I would like people to perceive me. I have bought the best clothes, drive a nice car, basically transformed myself into what I think people enjoy. In creating this image I have taken great risks with my health and life.

Now you say you are not fake, which is it?