I think I need a girlfriend

[KillahBee]

these fucking keys man, they are just bringin me down when I'm out and about. i've been measuring the pros and cons and i really do think it's worth the pain and suffering to have a real live "key carrier" walk around with me. when i go out, my shit is tight. sexy ass shirt, chesticles exposed, nice little watch (not too flashy, but nothing you've seen before), shoes all polished and matching the belt perfectly. and naturally, the perfect pants. maybe they're chocolate brown pinstripe, maybe gun metal grey. either way, they fit the way pants were meant to fit a maing. throw a set of keys in the mix - with the fucking car key, fucking starter, fucking house key, fucking back door key (pick3), fucking parents' house key - and my shit gets all fucked up.

this is no way for a man to go thru life.

 

[-Ariel-]

Sounds Tight...
Yup.

Knock Em Dead Killa.

 

[-SD-]

lol @ 'rents house key

 

[nefertiti]

these fucking keys man, they are just bringin me down when I'm out and about. i've been measuring the pros and cons and i really do think it's worth the pain and suffering to have a real live "key carrier" walk around with me. when i go out, my shit is tight. sexy ass shirt, chesticles exposed, nice little watch (not too flashy, but nothing you've seen before), shoes all polished and matching the belt perfectly. and naturally, the perfect pants. maybe they're chocolate brown pinstripe, maybe gun metal grey. either way, they fit the way pants were meant to fit a maing. throw a set of keys in the mix - with the fucking car key, fucking starter, fucking house key, fucking back door key (pick3), fucking parents' house key - and my shit gets all fucked up.

this is no way for a man to go thru life.

You need a detachable key ring like this:

Keychains USA - Detachable Key Ring

On one ring, keep nothing but the car key. When you go out, split the two rings, keep the car key, clothes stay streamlined and pretty.

 

[KillahBee]

You need a detachable key ring like this:

Keychains USA - Detachable Key Ring

On one ring, keep nothing but the car key. When you go out, split the two rings, keep the car key, clothes stay streamlined and pretty.

yeah but that shit leaves me open for way too many opportunities for anarchy:

- get drunk, hand my detached hosue key to a stripper and tell her "we'll party *wink*wink* after you get off. wake up next morning with robbed house and crabs
- take the wrong fucking key off my chain resulting in me locking my keys in the car like an asshole
- when at a coke/K party, teeth grindin like a meth addict, i politely split my two keys up so that several guests can take bumps simultaneously. completely lost in the high, i wander into a bathroom by myself, wrap the seashell embroidered hand towels around my neck and auto erotic asphyxiate myself to thorough orgasm thinking about what i would do if i saw megan fox in a coffee shop

 

[nefertiti]

yeah but that shit leaves me open for way too many opportunities for anarchy:

- get drunk, hand my detached hosue key to a stripper and tell her "we'll party *wink*wink* after you get off. wake up next morning with robbed house and crabs
- take the wrong fucking key off my chain resulting in me locking my keys in the car like an asshole
- when at a coke/K party, teeth grindin like a meth addict, i politely split my two keys up so that several guests can take bumps simultaneously. completely lost in the high, i wander into a bathroom by myself, wrap the seashell embroidered hand towels around my neck and auto erotic asphyxiate myself to thorough orgasm thinking about what i would do if i saw megan fox in a coffee shop

lol, you have a point. Get a girlfriend.

 

[nefertiti]

On second thought, that's still less trouble than a girlfriend would get you into.

My vote is back with the key ring.

 

[KillahBee]

On second thought, that's still less trouble than a girlfriend would get you into.

My vote is back with the key ring.

goddamnit, you're right.

 

[ortiz34]

holy fuck you are funny

you also need help

 

[FISHTALES]

these fucking keys man, they are just bringin me down when I'm out and about. i've been measuring the pros and cons and i really do think it's worth the pain and suffering to have a real live "key carrier" walk around with me. when i go out, my shit is tight. sexy ass shirt, chesticles exposed, nice little watch (not too flashy, but nothing you've seen before), shoes all polished and matching the belt perfectly. and naturally, the perfect pants. maybe they're chocolate brown pinstripe, maybe gun metal grey. either way, they fit the way pants were meant to fit a maing. throw a set of keys in the mix - with the fucking car key, fucking starter, fucking house key, fucking back door key (pick3), fucking parents' house key - and my shit gets all fucked up.

this is no way for a man to go thru life.

Thought you meant a pistol.

 

[Lambruh]

- when at a coke/K party, teeth grindin like a meth addict, i politely split my two keys up so that several guests can take bumps simultaneously. completely lost in the high, i wander into a bathroom by myself, wrap the seashell embroidered hand towels around my neck and auto erotic asphyxiate myself to thorough orgasm thinking about what i would do if i saw megan fox in a coffee shop

not only is this reality, but it's fuckin hilarious

you're on a roll today

 

[PICK3]

these fucking keys man, they are just bringin me down when I'm out and about. i've been measuring the pros and cons and i really do think it's worth the pain and suffering to have a real live "key carrier" walk around with me. when i go out, my shit is tight. sexy ass shirt, chesticles exposed, nice little watch (not too flashy, but nothing you've seen before), shoes all polished and matching the belt perfectly. and naturally, the perfect pants. maybe they're chocolate brown pinstripe, maybe gun metal grey. either way, they fit the way pants were meant to fit a maing. throw a set of keys in the mix - with the fucking car key, fucking starter, fucking house key, fucking back door key (pick3), fucking parents' house key - and my shit gets all fucked up.

this is no way for a man to go thru life.

wtf???

&

Java packs an impressive array of keys, yet he doesn't have a gf.

just sayin'

 

[myway]

lmfao! I hate carrying keys,2.... but u just made it WAY complicated,lol.

 

[Scotsman]

these fucking keys man, they are just bringin me down when I'm out and about. i've been measuring the pros and cons and i really do think it's worth the pain and suffering to have a real live "key carrier" walk around with me. when i go out, my shit is tight. sexy ass shirt, chesticles exposed, nice little watch (not too flashy, but nothing you've seen before), shoes all polished and matching the belt perfectly. and naturally, the perfect pants. maybe they're chocolate brown pinstripe, maybe gun metal grey. either way, they fit the way pants were meant to fit a maing. throw a set of keys in the mix - with the fucking car key, fucking starter, fucking house key, fucking back door key (pick3), fucking parents' house key - and my shit gets all fucked up.

this is no way for a man to go thru life.

This is the single geighest post you have ever made.

And that's one hell of an accomplishment considering your posting history.

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[musclemom]

Don't know what to tell you, keys and wallets are the bane of modern existance, that's why women carry purses. Maybe you need a purse?

 

[jnevin]

yeah but that shit leaves me open for way too many opportunities for anarchy:

- get drunk, hand my detached hosue key to a stripper and tell her "we'll party *wink*wink* after you get off. wake up next morning with robbed house and crabs
- take the wrong fucking key off my chain resulting in me locking my keys in the car like an asshole
- when at a coke/K party, teeth grindin like a meth addict, i politely split my two keys up so that several guests can take bumps simultaneously. completely lost in the high, i wander into a bathroom by myself, wrap the seashell embroidered hand towels around my neck and auto erotic asphyxiate myself to thorough orgasm thinking about what i would do if i saw megan fox in a coffee shop

Yeah, I audibly lol'd at this stupid shit. Mostly because the last 2 sound exactly like something I'd do. The wrong key one I'd see happening in slow motion and would follow with a Chris Farleyesque tantrum/ rampage resulting in torn pants and a posedown with a random homeless person.

cunt

 

[KillahBee]

This is the single geighest post you have ever made.

And that's one hell of an accomplishment considering your posting history.

Cheers,
Scotsman

I find that hard to believe, maing

 

[Scotsman]

I find that hard to believe, maing

Mind boggling isn't it?

Cheers,
Scotsman

 

[rnch]

these fucking keys man, they are just bringin me down when I'm out and about. i've been measuring the pros and cons and i really do think it's worth the pain and suffering to have a real live "key carrier" walk around with me. when i go out, my shit is tight. sexy ass shirt, chesticles exposed, nice little watch (not too flashy, but nothing you've seen before), shoes all polished and matching the belt perfectly. and naturally, the perfect pants. maybe they're chocolate brown pinstripe, maybe gun metal grey. either way, they fit the way pants were meant to fit a maing. throw a set of keys in the mix - with the fucking car key, fucking starter, fucking house key, fucking back door key (pick3), fucking parents' house key - and my shit gets all fucked up.

this is no way for a man to go thru life.

 

[Satva1100]

fuck keys. i leave em in the truck. i have a keyless entry code thing on the door so im good. fuck wallets too cash and id only

 

[KillahBee]

fuck keys. i leave em in the truck. i have a keyless entry code thing on the door so im good. fuck wallets too cash and id only

i'm with ya on the wallet thing. since i was a kid i aways carried just a little credit card wallet and then my money in my pocket (like my pops). what i've started doing when i go out is just take a few credit cards, atm card and license with me and then my thousands in singles.

for the dancing whores.