I need some help bro's, my wife had cheated on me.

[Spectre]

BTW: I am moving my assests out of the way while we are married and it's mine to do what I damn well please too with. Why even make a target for a fight? Lots of cash in a distant safe, nothing illegal. I am even going to go so far as to refi my properties and pull the equity out (I am on the loan and deeds only) and develope a bad case of gambling and few round trip tickets to Vegas, right? I need to guarantee my future, not hers. It will be gone along time before any possible court.

 

[alien amp pharm]

Fuck that shit man...Seriously Who in their RIGHT mind would WANT to stay married with someone that could do such a thing...You people can say what you want, but to me it's a Black or white issue...YOU do it your wrong END OF STORY.

Absolutely 100% correct!!!

Everyone I know that's been 'forgiven' for cheating has did it again sometime in the future. I'm not talking about 70% or 80%, etc. but EVERY SINGLE CHEATER I have encountered or have seen in other's relationships all did it again.

It takes a certain individual to cheat because it is a big deal. It effects so much and so many. Anyone willing to cross that line has already shown what kind of individual he/she is - a totally selfish one that may feel sorry for a while, but in reality DOES NOT CARE ABOUT OTHER'S FEELINGS.

You will have nothing but problems in the future if you continue to give this $!@# another chance. Trust me.

 

[big_bad_buff]

I honestly don't think she would, actually it's far easier to run than stay. But I'm picking up what your saying bro.

cheating is the worse thing you can do beside murder. sure you should forgive her most definitely, but the truth is, you can't and wont forget, this will always run through your mind. what is she doing when your not with her? can you trust her? your better off moving on bro.

 

[manny78]

What has happened to you is what I fear most.. not just the fact of having someone you love betray you like that.. but also spending time in jail.


I have a friend of mine that is quite a bit older then me. Well to make a long story short.. he busted his wife with another man. He waited until he caught them in the act to confront them. When he did this he had a 12 gauge shotgun in his hand. He put it to the guys head and made his wife watch as he proceeded to blow the dudes head off. He only served 9 years. (8 years and some change)

You see.. in a case like that.. it is a crime of passion, so he was charged with "Invoulantary Manslaughter"

his wife has to live the rest of her life knowing that because she was a slutwhore.. she cost a man his life.

Man that guy is my hero !!! But I would have done things differently. Just handcuffed the guy and tell my wife "look here's the deal, either you kill him with this knife and nothing happens to you, or I'll just blow your heads, your call baby"......


Spectre: to anser your question, 6 months is way too long. I mean people will usually forgive for the usual "one night mistake", but not for a 6 months of straight cheating. It's impossible to have a normal relationship again. Your trust for her will be next to zero, you'll spend the rest of your life suspecting your wife and the most important thing: you'll end up cheating her. Given the opportunity you would, just like any other cheated-forgiver-husband would. So why not just get the hell out of there ?

I mean, she's not worth your time and your love. But if you're staying in this relationship cause of the kids (common mistake) then be sure to have a girl on the side. You earned the right for.

Good luck.

 

[TC2]

"(post #39)

I could never forgive or forget, I would of probably knocked her ass out aftershe told me the story of her "mistake"


Same here, dude simple fact is that YOU WILL NEVER FORGET OR BE ABLE TO COMPLETELY FORGIVE HER.

I don't care who you are, it will eventully eat at you. And in my experience if someone cheats once they'll do it again.

I don't care how "sorry" she is, she did this shit for 6 months, think about that for a min.

That means for 6 months she's has been coniving and planning how and when she was/is going to have sex with another man.

It may have even been in your house, your bed, Do you think she'd tell you the truth????

 

[MFMan]

Don't be stupid. If she did it once she will do it again. Get rid of her.

 

[Spectre]

You guys bring up many painfull points, 99% valid. The biggest thing I am strugling with is that I am trying to treat her as how I would expect to be treated.

I am not thinking clearly at all at this point really. I am not going to make any decissions at this momment that can effect a lifetime, especially with the little ones. I am going to have to let this settle out for awhile...

 

[TC2]

I feel for you dude, I really hate hearing about shit like this. I don't know why people just can't be good to each other.

 

[JohnyJuice]

You guys bring up many painfull points, 99% valid. The biggest thing I am strugling with is that I am trying to treat her as how I would expect to be treated.

I am not thinking clearly at all at this point really. I am not going to make any decissions at this momment that can effect a lifetime, especially with the little ones. I am going to have to let this settle out for awhile...

Just be careful you dont start making excuses for her and justifying her actions while you are thinking. People have a tendency to do this.

 

[TC2]

agreed, Don't think this shits your fault either.