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Has a significant other ever disapproved of your body?

uamaverick

uamaverick

New member
I dated this one chick last year that hated my build. She said I had no neck, and made it very vocal that she didn't like the way I looked. She said my arms and chest were way too big. Long story short, of course I dumped her ass, LOL. Looking back on it, I don't think she even thought I was attractive. Makes me think why she was even with me in the first place.

It did fuck with my head though, and made me try to analyze whether or not my neck was too large for a few weeks.
 
Lmao, screw that cunt!! You should have told her that her vag looked like two pieces of raw carne asada slapped together.

Back to topic, No to answer your question. That girl was mean damn.
 
Back when I used to just go for all out mass in my early twenties I was told the same thing. I had holes in the neck of my shirts, lol.
That crazy bitch was actually right and I have had the poon chasing me ever since.
 
ceo said:
"Ooohhh, look at mee! I'm huuuuge!"
Click to expand...


LOL. I didn't even think I looked that big, honestly. The biggest I've ever been was 204 lbs @ about 11% BF. I was about 183 @ 7% BF when she was telling me all of that. It wasn't just a one time comment, either. She made it a point to let me know she didn't like the way I looked. I told her to GTFO soon after.
 
ceo said:
"Ooohhh, look at mee! I'm huuuuge!"
Click to expand...

lol, that is not necessarily a good look for picking up teh wiminz though. I guess if you can keep your BF% sooper dooper low, but that is hard unless you are about to compete or something.
 
Huh. I like more mass on a man. I don't wanna feel like I can break him. Most guys I go for aren't much taller than 6' and definitely over 200lbs.


And yes, the father of my children liked me to say real skinny. So after my second son I went up to a size 5. I was like 137lbs I'm just under 5'5". He called me "full moon" and made fun of me every time I ate.
 
my ex husband would give me shit if I went over 135 lbs at 5' 8" and call my chubby

a normal weight for me is more like 160 lbs..otherwise you can count my ribs on my back
I still have really serious issues wrapping my head around weight/body image issues and am intensely insecure
I'm even having a hard time with it pregnant..just watching the scale go up freaks me out
 
uamaverick said:
I dated this one chick last year that hated my build. She said I had no neck, and made it very vocal that she didn't like the way I looked. She said my arms and chest were way too big. Long story short, of course I dumped her ass, LOL. Looking back on it, I don't think she even thought I was attractive. Makes me think why she was even with me in the first place.

It did fuck with my head though, and made me try to analyze whether or not my neck was too large for a few weeks.
Click to expand...

At some point in your life you will realize that girls obsessed with your body are all shallow rhymes with hunts and not worth dealing with anyway.
 
shirlene29 said:
my ex husband would give me shit if I went over 135 lbs at 5' 8" and call my chubby

a normal weight for me is more like 160 lbs..otherwise you can count my ribs on my back
I still have really serious issues wrapping my head around weight/body image issues and am intensely insecure
I'm even having a hard time with it pregnant..just watching the scale go up freaks me out
Click to expand...

I swear..its always a man that's makes us that way too. If I didn't hear so much shit about what a woman is "supposed" to weigh and what she is "supposed" to look like. Just reading this thread gives me anxiety. I still have not recovered from the insecurity being pregnant brought out. I felt like I was a chubby middle school kid all over again..it was awful and it never really went away. Being pregnant made me crazy..and its sad that it's that way...

As we get older..all of us..men and women..really should be less concnered about what a person looks like and more on if you can talk to them and are they a good person. Yes..you have to be sexually attracted to them..but if a guy is going to look at my body in a critical manner in the beginning what potential would he have long term..none.

The fact that a guy that thinks someone is chubby at 135 and 5'8 makes me sick. It's like half of the male population expects us to starve...and then they bitch when we don't order anything at a restaurant. lol

uamav..this chick sounds insane. You look good to me :p I wouldn't complain! :D
 
cindylou said:
The fact that a guy that thinks someone is chubby at 135 and 5'8 makes me sick. It's like half of the male population expects us to starve...and then they bitch when we don't order anything at a restaurant. lol

uamav..this chick sounds insane. You look good to me :p I wouldn't complain! :D
Click to expand...

LOL, well I'm 1 for 1 at least.

I don't know many men who would turn down 135 lbs @ 5'8". That's pretty much right on track. Some of these guys sound like assholes.
 
Only complaint I've ever had was a desire for me to gain weight. Usually the guys I'm dating love my body
10x more than I do. My comfort weight is around 115, but most guys prefer me around 125.
 
LOL, I did?

wimminz just don't possess all the necessary qualities needed to turn me on, which limits my choices greatly :(

I just haven't met one that does yet, so i shouldn't really rule out the lezbeen possibility!!
 
cindylou said:
The fact that a guy that thinks someone is chubby at 135 and 5'8 makes me sick. It's like half of the male population expects us to starve...and then they bitch when we don't order anything at a restaurant. lol
Click to expand...

Cindy this doesnt relate to me specifically but maybe guys get spoiled initially by your bombshell appearance and when the lbs add on later it a bummer . I dunno just stabbing in the dark.

Like young men, then as they get older vast majority have "beer bellies" or w/e you get my point. Women socially dont voice their discomfort with their man being overweight as much as men typically do, IMO.

Personally a women with meat is SUPER sexy IMO. 125-140 PRIMO baby haha
 
AnnieFiedler said:
135 at 5'8 is not right on track, especially if the girl has muscle and isn't just skinny fat.
Click to expand...

Going by weight and height is not a great way to judge health or appearance. 135 and 5'8" is fine.
I'm 5'9" and 135 is not a bad weight for me at all. That's a size four for me. In fact, the only people who ever had anything to say about my weight in that range were women who would admiringly say, "oh you're so slim".
Depends on your goals. Powerlifting? Rhythmic gymnastics? Ballet? Volleyball? Different shapes abound for different sports, and 135 and 5'8" is completely normal.
I'm about ten pounds over that now, and am a size six.
I have large bones too- a 6 3/4 inch wrist.

Getting back on track, no one has ever complained about my appearance- but that is because there is no reason to. I haven't had any major troubles with maintaining my appearance.

Women do think they have to be thin though- my comfort weight would be 125- but I haven't been that in years, and my goal at that time was runway modeling, so I had to be thin then. I'm too old for that nonsense now.
 
LOLZ @ all the fat ass insecure fucks in this thread,LOLZ. WHen you've run through ass much poosie as I have you find that the only thing that matters in the end is if you consider the person a friend and can be yourself with them. If you can and the bish is 200 lbs, who cares, I need a companion, I get plenty ass round town. And I agree UA,you look like shit ya no neck fuck, I wouldn't fuck ya unless ya paid me. :)
 
LOL @ menz being at fault for a woman being insecure

Women care more about what other women think of them, than men. Men do not go around calling other men sluts. Men do not get overly catty at another guys outfits. Men do not get jealous when a good looking bro walks in the room. Men do not critique the size of another guys bulge "it's fake or its a pushup jockey".

So low self-esteem starts 30-40 years when a male spouse gives a woman some constructive critism on her appearance? nga plz

Women have a social value civil war between themselves, that is the base foundation to their insecurity.
 
Lambruh said:
LOL @ menz being at fault for a woman being insecure

Women care more about what other women think of them, than men. Men do not go around calling other men sluts. Men do not get overly catty at another guys outfits. Men do not get jealous when a good looking bro walks in the room. Men do not critique the size of another guys bulge "it's fake or its a pushup jockey".

So low self-esteem starts 30-40 years when a male spouse gives a woman some constructive critism on her appearance? nga plz

Women have a social value civil war between themselves, that is the base foundation to their insecurity.
Click to expand...



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZ25o7iYZ50
 
:)
Lambruh said:
LOL @ menz being at fault for a woman being insecure

Women care more about what other women think of them, than men. Men do not go around calling other men sluts. Men do not get overly catty at another guys outfits. Men do not get jealous when a good looking bro walks in the room. Men do not critique the size of another guys bulge "it's fake or its a pushup jockey".

So low self-esteem starts 30-40 years when a male spouse gives a woman some constructive critism on her appearance? nga plz

Women have a social value civil war between themselves, that is the base foundation to their insecurity.
Click to expand...
I agree with all except the fact that my bulge has been critiqued all over this board by more men than women. I know it's not fair to be so sexy and have a big fat cock, but God give you nuggas brains, he gave me a 9 inch equalizer :)
 
trex74 said:
Going by weight and height is not a great way to judge health or appearance. 135 and 5'8" is fine.
I'm 5'9" and 135 is not a bad weight for me at all. That's a size four for me. In fact, the only people who ever had anything to say about my weight in that range were women who would admiringly say, "oh you're so slim".
Depends on your goals. Powerlifting? Rhythmic gymnastics? Ballet? Volleyball? Different shapes abound for different sports, and 135 and 5'8" is completely normal.
I'm about ten pounds over that now, and am a size six.
I have large bones too- a 6 3/4 inch wrist.

Getting back on track, no one has ever complained about my appearance- but that is because there is no reason to. I haven't had any major troubles with maintaining my appearance.

Women do think they have to be thin though- my comfort weight would be 125- but I haven't been that in years, and my goal at that time was runway modeling, so I had to be thin then. I'm too old for that nonsense now.
Click to expand...

I never meant a woman couldnt or shouldn't be 135 at that height. I just meant that a woman could also weigh more and be just as on track. Diff body types, diff goals, etc. it's silly for someone to put any one weight in a box and say that's the right one.
 
pretty much every girl i've dated says they don't like me when i'm too big or that they don't want me to get too big.

by most accounts, i'm not, but given my small bone structure and oversized traps when i'm eating and training hard for awhile, i just start to look awkward.
 
cindylou said:
I swear..its always a man that's makes us that way too. If I didn't hear so much shit about what a woman is "supposed" to weigh and what she is "supposed" to look like. Just reading this thread gives me anxiety. I still have not recovered from the insecurity being pregnant brought out. I felt like I was a chubby middle school kid all over again..it was awful and it never really went away. Being pregnant made me crazy..and its sad that it's that way...

As we get older..all of us..men and women..really should be less concnered about what a person looks like and more on if you can talk to them and are they a good person. Yes..you have to be sexually attracted to them..but if a guy is going to look at my body in a critical manner in the beginning what potential would he have long term..none.

The fact that a guy that thinks someone is chubby at 135 and 5'8 makes me sick. It's like half of the male population expects us to starve...and then they bitch when we don't order anything at a restaurant. lol

uamav..this chick sounds insane. You look good to me :p I wouldn't complain! :D
Click to expand...

manhater alert!!
 
I did. ask Cindy, probably because of comments like that I weighed in the low 80's in my early twenties.

They have no concept of what a woman should weigh when they make comments like that, lol.
 
guys know exactly what women should look like, because millions of years of evolution have refined our preferences. Trust us, we think anorexic chicks are gross too. but for the most part, skinny is healthy. sorry
 
trex74 said:
Going by weight and height is not a great way to judge health or appearance. 135 and 5'8" is fine.
I'm 5'9" and 135 is not a bad weight for me at all. That's a size four for me. In fact, the only people who ever had anything to say about my weight in that range were women who would admiringly say, "oh you're so slim".
Depends on your goals. Powerlifting? Rhythmic gymnastics? Ballet? Volleyball? Different shapes abound for different sports, and 135 and 5'8" is completely normal.
I'm about ten pounds over that now, and am a size six.
I have large bones too- a 6 3/4 inch wrist.

Getting back on track, no one has ever complained about my appearance- but that is because there is no reason to. I haven't had any major troubles with maintaining my appearance.

Women do think they have to be thin though- my comfort weight would be 125- but I haven't been that in years, and my goal at that time was runway modeling, so I had to be thin then. I'm too old for that nonsense now.
Click to expand...

I don't know if there's any truth to that wrist measuring test for determining body frame. I did it a few yrs ago and i was considered small frame. I just measured my wrist now and it 5.7in. im 5'6 1/2 so thats considered small frame. I have broad shoulders and wide back, def big boned looking.

I'd really like to find out my body type/structure but the description just doesn't match. I look very skeletonish at 135lbs and im not even 5'8. you'd be able to count my ribs standing up.
 
A woman can break up with a bro, in the same day have sex and maybe even start a relationship with any other man she wants, no matter if she's 80lbs or 150lbs.

With that type of zero competition to reproduce (meaning of life). Women actually think MEN are the reason for wimminz ego/esteem? There is barely any competition for women to attract a men, so there's barely any point to look better than the next woman. So why are they so feisty at each other?

Men, depending exert 10x the energy to get laid than women and we STILL don't care as much about our physical appearance as women do. It's just how they're wired
 
Lambruh said:
A woman can break up with a bro, in the same day have sex and maybe even start a relationship with any other man she wants, no matter if she's 80lbs or 150lbs.

With that type of zero competition to reproduce (meaning of life). Women actually think MEN are the reason for wimminz ego/esteem? There is barely any competition for women to attract a men, so there's barely any point to look better than the next woman. So why are they so feisty at each other?

Men, depending exert 10x the energy to get laid than women and we STILL don't care as much about our physical appearance as women do. It's just how they're wired
Click to expand...

that's not entirely true.

the ultimate goal of a woman, from a hard wiring perspective, is to reproduce with the most "suitable" man. Now a days that translate into security and/or power. In the beginning of civilization, that usually meant the one with the strongest genes to have an offspring that could survive and also one who could provide for the family.

the segment of men who make up that population is very small, but realistically most women are competing against each other to attract that type of mate.

Much like money, 10% of the population controls 90% of the vagina
 
But how easy is it for a woman to fuck a bro caked up, than it is for a bro to fuck a female neurologist?

All i'm trying to say is men, no matter how rich/good looking/good morals, those dudes are still not nearly as picky when teh tang is in teh face. There's no need for the cat fights to boil over into pointing fingers at the bro's.

How many times when your with a girl does she critique something so physically idiotic about herself or another chick and you go "HUH?, most of these things we don't even notice
 
Lambruh said:
But how easy is it for a woman to fuck a bro caked up, than it is for a bro to fuck a female neurologist?

All i'm trying to say is men, no matter how rich/good looking/good morals, those dudes are still not nearly as picky when teh tang is in teh face. There's no need for the cat fights to boil over into pointing fingers at the bro's.

How many times when your with a girl does she critique something so physically idiotic about herself or another chick and you go "HUH?, most of these things we don't even notice
Click to expand...

oh yeah, completely.

females as a whole are more vulnerable to insecurities than men, at least physically. Most men respond to competition by trying to become better themselves. Women on the other hand tend to respond to competition by trying to disparage/discredit their competitors.

I mean, how many genuinely confident women do you come across? Not many. It's almost always insecurity masked by bitchiness.
Men in general are the more confident gender due to their social roles. To be a provider and to get ahead, you have to be confident otherwise you die.
 
Lambruh said:
LOL @ menz being at fault for a woman being insecure

Women care more about what other women think of them, than men. Men do not go around calling other men sluts. Men do not get overly catty at another guys outfits. Men do not get jealous when a good looking bro walks in the room. Men do not critique the size of another guys bulge "it's fake or its a pushup jockey".

So low self-esteem starts 30-40 years when a male spouse gives a woman some constructive critism on her appearance? nga plz

Women have a social value civil war between themselves, that is the base foundation to their insecurity.
Click to expand...

I do agree with most of this. A woman's worst enimies are usually women. But I do think that the significant other has a lot of power when it comes to building up or bringing down confidence. There is a difference between constructive criticism and being an ass.
 
zmclc4.jpg
 
I'm 5'8.5" and 250lbs in gym clothes. I'm not ripped by any means. In fact I have abit of a gut. Not a beer gut, but like strongman type of gut from thick abs with bodyfat. Sometimes I catch myself in the mirror at a public bathroom or something under really shitty light and think to myself no wonder girls don't bother looking at me.

Then I come to my senses and remember looking good for the ladies is not my goal. Getting big and strong is. I'm not going to base every thing I do on whether or not a girl will find me physically attractive.

I admit most girls like a lean, semi-muscled guy that is immaculately groomed. Basically the "metro" look.

Honestly when I see guys that look like that the first thing that comes to my mind is fag. Chest hair was considered sexy back in the day to alot of women. Nowadays it's looked down upon.

I can't stand "shaved" women. I'd rather hit an au natural girl than one that looks like a fuckin pre-teen.

I do believe that alot of guys workout and groom because they genuinely like it, but I'd bet dollars to donuts that if this wasn't what so many girls are into nowadays that they wouldn't waste the time to bother with it. I sure as hell am not gonna shave my chest hair and happy trail because a girl might not like it. Overly groomed people look androgynous to me.

Now I've steered abit away from the original intent of this topic, but if a girl I was dating ever told me my neck was too big or my legs were too thick I'd dump her on the spot. I could nitpick literally any women I see one way or another. Oh, your body is amazing, too bad you have old grandma hands. Oh your face is beautiful, too bad you have some cottage cheese under your ass. It's stupid. Noone is perfect. Even the most "perfect" looking people are generally mentally/emotionally faaaaaaar from perfect.

If you really want to look a specific way for yourself then that's great. If you do it to get the ladies or please others(90% of the people likely) then you're just doing it to please other people and not yourself. Basically if nobody gave a shit how groomed you were all of a sudden, or what clothes you wear, or how built you were, you would realize most of it's bullshit and wouldn't bother doing it.

I'm proud to be American, but this countries fascination with materialism, image and the socially/career successful is downright messed up. Not only that, but the complete 180 this country does with overt sexuality vs sexual repression is pretty fucking bizarre.

Anyhow...
 
Lambruh said:
A woman can break up with a bro, in the same day have sex and maybe even start a relationship with any other man she wants, no matter if she's 80lbs or 150lbs.

With that type of zero competition to reproduce (meaning of life). Women actually think MEN are the reason for wimminz ego/esteem? There is barely any competition for women to attract a men, so there's barely any point to look better than the next woman. So why are they so feisty at each other?

Men, depending exert 10x the energy to get laid than women and we STILL don't care as much about our physical appearance as women do. It's just how they're wired
Click to expand...

true...I shouldn't have blamed guys...its probably just our culture..bombarded with advertising that turns women into objects...we FEEL like objects instead of human beings...trying to be perfect 24/7...and feel like we are worth less when we are not "perfect"...and some of us really do feel our self worth drop when we are not in perfect shape with no lines..no wrinkles...because thats what we see..thats what you see too and I think men become disappointed or disatisfied with a real woman sometimes...

as far as women are concerned..never cared what another woman thought about me...I've never had one comment on my appearance to my face although I realize they do talk about me behind my back...lol :)
 
While I think our culture often puts out an unattainable image of the ideal woman, I hardly think all the blame for female insecurity can be placed on it. Women who are insecure about themselves would probably be insecure whether models in magazines were airbrushed and two pounds or if they were older and 150 pounds. If someone is insecure, they're always going to find something wrong with themselves even if the most promoted beauty ideal changed. We aren't the only country or culture that has women with eating disorders and whatnot.

Insecure women will be insecure women no matter what. Long story short, people need to not complain or worry about their every little imperfection. You would never go into a job interview and tell your potential boss and coworkers all the little things that are wrong with you, so why would a girl ever say those things to a boyfriend? It's annoying and he'd probably never notice otherwise. Women give men too much credit for how observant they are. Act and think you're beautiful and you will be.
 
AnnieFiedler said:
While I think our culture often puts out an unattainable image of the ideal woman, I hardly think all the blame for female insecurity can be placed on it. Women who are insecure about themselves would probably be insecure whether models in magazines were airbrushed and two pounds or if they were older and 150 pounds. If someone is insecure, they're always going to find something wrong with themselves even if the most promoted beauty ideal changed. We aren't the only country or culture that has women with eating disorders and whatnot.

Insecure women will be insecure women no matter what. Long story short, people need to not complain or worry about their every little imperfection. You would never go into a job interview and tell your potential boss and coworkers all the little things that are wrong with you, so why would a girl ever say those things to a boyfriend? It's annoying and he'd probably never notice otherwise. Women give men too much credit for how observant they are. Act and think you're beautiful and you will be.
Click to expand...

Good advice.

Though I think everyone goes through phases...not everyone is confident all the time with their appearance or their abilities to perform on the job or about anything. Anyone who is.. is faking it. Fake confidence is just that...fake.. and left unchecked turns into arrogance which is just a mask of an insecure person...that's usually the bitchy women I keep hearing about...lol. I agree complaining about it to a guy would get annoying..but that does not mean it's not bouncing around in the back of our head either...or at least mine. :) I tend to over think things though..lol

It's just who I am..I guess a guy can take me or leave me. Or as Dorthy Parker would say..as the usual order of things..both. :)
 
Id put a bitch through a brick wall if she ever gave me shit over how I looked.

j/k

actually ive had lots of complaints about my body.Not how I look. More of the fact that cause of my size I tend to lumber about when i move and when Im competing I dont have a whole lot of energy to do much else recreationally( go on beach walks, hiking, etc...)
so I suppose that is a complaint...
 
AnnieFiedler said:
While I think our culture often puts out an unattainable image of the ideal woman, I hardly think all the blame for female insecurity can be placed on it. Women who are insecure about themselves would probably be insecure whether models in magazines were airbrushed and two pounds or if they were older and 150 pounds. If someone is insecure, they're always going to find something wrong with themselves even if the most promoted beauty ideal changed. We aren't the only country or culture that has women with eating disorders and whatnot.

Insecure women will be insecure women no matter what. Long story short, people need to not complain or worry about their every little imperfection. You would never go into a job interview and tell your potential boss and coworkers all the little things that are wrong with you, so why would a girl ever say those things to a boyfriend? It's annoying and he'd probably never notice otherwise. Women give men too much credit for how observant they are. Act and think you're beautiful and you will be.
Click to expand...


Spot on

While I was in rehab for a few months i'd say 50% of the girls I talked to in there not only had a drug/alc addiction but most all had a slight connection to body dysmorphic disorder (ontop of a abused childhood, crazy bfs, lifestyle). Many claimed they abused drugs/alc because it numbed their mind of their racing obsessions with their self appearance of hating themself.

But in the end it's all addictive personalities + the potency of euphoria in the drug/behavior that = the addict

Whether I never picked up a drug in my life, i'd still be addicted to chewing gum or sex or work or something. My experiences growing up just wired me that way. Same thing you say about women, whether she see's a Victoria Secrets ad or not, the low self-esteem is still with her in some other fasion
 
uamaverick said:
I dated this one chick last year that hated my build. She said I had no neck, and made it very vocal that she didn't like the way I looked. She said my arms and chest were way too big. Long story short, of course I dumped her ass, LOL. Looking back on it, I don't think she even thought I was attractive. Makes me think why she was even with me in the first place.

It did fuck with my head though, and made me try to analyze whether or not my neck was too large for a few weeks.
Click to expand...

Good move, Bro!

The type of person to bash anything about you which you have a certain way because you want it, or if it's something you maybe don't want but can't help, that's a RED FLAG for a problem! Whether it's political beliefs, bicep size, or what you like to watch on TV, a GF/BF/wife/husband has to be OK with it, be willing to compromise, or forget it.

Charles
 
I've never had anyone over criticize me, some constructive criticism yes but never blunt complaining, I dont think I'd allow it to go on for a long time either... I'm not thin right now but I know and my husband knows(he's overweight too) and he knows I know so there is really no need to drill it in or bring it up all the time... of course if you see someone with unhealthy weight AND they continue to make poor lifestyle choices (over weight and constantly eating crap or going to buffets, etc) that I can understand why it's being brought up, but in uamavericks' case where he actually is fit and healthy bishes should not complaint they should consider themselves lucky and STFU or look for a man with a body type they like more....
 
uamaverick said:
I dated this one chick last year that hated my build. She said I had no neck, and made it very vocal that she didn't like the way I looked. She said my arms and chest were way too big. Long story short, of course I dumped her ass, LOL. Looking back on it, I don't think she even thought I was attractive. Makes me think why she was even with me in the first place.

It did fuck with my head though, and made me try to analyze whether or not my neck was too large for a few weeks.
Click to expand...

Ive dated a lady who didnt like me being 'inshape'. Said it made her feel insecure.
 
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