F*ck Mother's Day

[jboy45]

I posted this in another thread about Mother's Day and thought it deserved its own:

Mom died three years ago. So sold my dignity for cheap on Saturday night/Sunday morning. My friend and I meet up every mother's day because we are both devoid of mother's and like to suffer together. He won a poker tournament that day and had $12k burning a hole through his pocket. This is how it went:

1. Did shots of whiskey until decision-making abilities were impaired
2. Booked plane flight on the redeye to Vegas
3. Missed plane flight
4. Went to Tootsie's(Strip Club) instead.
5. Spent $7000 on champagne, lap dances, and a private room.
6. In the private room, three strippers did a dildo show.
7. Friend banged two of the strippers while I got a blowjob from the third. (I have a girlfriend and didn't want to overdo it)
8. Didn't want to spent another $100 on a cab ride home so my friend arranged a ride back to my house from 2 of the strippers who we thought were Indian.
9. Got home and banged them in my living room.
10. We called them "dot heads" during coitus. They eventually told us they were actually Argentinian.
11. I told the girl that for $400/hr I will call her whatever I please. She agreed.
12. Hated life for about 3 hours.
13. Went to downtowner with the same friend and drank more champagne to celebrate our misery.
14. Went to Bahia Cabana after that to meet up with a college friend of mine and her sister.
15. The day eventually led into the girls' sister, my friend, and I playing fingercuffs in her hotel room. (I got the front of the equation)
16. Came home to wallow in the wake of my self-destruction
17. Smoked a joint.
18. Jerked off.

None of this is skewed or embellished at all. I can swear on my mother's grave. I'm not bragging in the least. Just want other people who are in my same situation to know that they aren't the only people who do stupid shit on mother's day.

 

[KillahBee]

I posted this in another thread about Mother's Day and thought it deserved its own:

Mom died three years ago. So sold my dignity for cheap on Saturday night/Sunday morning. My friend and I meet up every mother's day because we are both devoid of mother's and like to suffer together. He won a poker tournament that day and had $12k burning a hole through his pocket. This is how it went:

1. Did shots of whiskey until decision-making abilities were impaired
2. Booked plane flight on the redeye to Vegas
3. Missed plane flight
4. Went to Tootsie's(Strip Club) instead.
5. Spent $7000 on champagne, lap dances, and a private room.
6. In the private room, three strippers did a dildo show.
7. Friend banged two of the strippers while I got a blowjob from the third. (I have a girlfriend and didn't want to overdo it)
8. Didn't want to spent another $100 on a cab ride home so my friend arranged a ride back to my house from 2 of the strippers who we thought were Indian.
9. Got home and banged them in my living room.
10. We called them "dot heads" during coitus. They eventually told us they were actually Argentinian.
11. I told the girl that for $400/hr I will call her whatever I please. She agreed.
12. Hated life for about 3 hours.
13. Went to downtowner with the same friend and drank more champagne to celebrate our misery.
14. Went to Bahia Cabana after that to meet up with a college friend of mine and her sister.
15. The day eventually led into the girls' sister, my friend, and I playing fingercuffs in her hotel room. (I got the front of the equation)
16. Came home to wallow in the wake of my self-destruction
17. Smoked a joint.
18. Jerked off.

None of this is skewed or embellished at all. I can swear on my mother's grave. I'm not bragging in the least. Just want other people who are in my same situation to know that they aren't the only people who do stupid shit on mother's day.

My kind of guy. lmfao at #7, #9 and #11.

fucking awesome

 

[Smurfy]

I posted this in another thread about Mother's Day and thought it deserved its own:

Mom died three years ago. So sold my dignity for cheap on Saturday night/Sunday morning. My friend and I meet up every mother's day because we are both devoid of mother's and like to suffer together. He won a poker tournament that day and had $12k burning a hole through his pocket. This is how it went:

1. Did shots of whiskey until decision-making abilities were impaired
2. Booked plane flight on the redeye to Vegas
3. Missed plane flight
4. Went to Tootsie's(Strip Club) instead.
5. Spent $7000 on champagne, lap dances, and a private room.
6. In the private room, three strippers did a dildo show.
7. Friend banged two of the strippers while I got a blowjob from the third. (I have a girlfriend and didn't want to overdo it)
8. Didn't want to spent another $100 on a cab ride home so my friend arranged a ride back to my house from 2 of the strippers who we thought were Indian.
9. Got home and banged them in my living room.
10. We called them "dot heads" during coitus. They eventually told us they were actually Argentinian.
11. I told the girl that for $400/hr I will call her whatever I please. She agreed.
12. Hated life for about 3 hours.
13. Went to downtowner with the same friend and drank more champagne to celebrate our misery.
14. Went to Bahia Cabana after that to meet up with a college friend of mine and her sister.
15. The day eventually led into the girls' sister, my friend, and I playing fingercuffs in her hotel room. (I got the front of the equation)
16. Came home to wallow in the wake of my self-destruction
17. Smoked a joint.
18. Jerked off.

None of this is skewed or embellished at all. I can swear on my mother's grave. I'm not bragging in the least. Just want other people who are in my same situation to know that they aren't the only people who do stupid shit on mother's day.

Your mother would be proud?

 

[musclemom]

You do realize that you could have easily saved yourself over $7,000, with essentially the same overall results, if you'd only done steps 1, 17 and 18, correct?

Take a little motherly advice, talk to a professional about your unresolved issues of pain vis a vis your mother's death. She'd be deeply saddened by your behavior. Nobody wants their son getting fucked up and pissing money away on cheesy whores.

 

[jboy45]

I didn't spend a dollar. We spent his winnings. Sometimes its easier this way musclemom. And I'm absolutely sure that my mother would be immensely disappointed in me.

 

[puddlemonkey]

Your friend is a retard.

 

[jboy45]

whiskey plays tricks on people

 

[SpyWizard]

You do realize that you could have easily saved yourself over $7,000, with essentially the same overall results, if you'd only done steps 1, 17 and 18, correct?

Take a little motherly advice, talk to a professional about your unresolved issues of pain vis a vis your mother's death. She'd be deeply saddened by your behavior. Nobody wants their son getting fucked up and pissing money away on cheesy whores.

MM and i don't agree on much since our lives are so different, but i lost my mom 1 1/2 yrs ago, and she is spot on regarding this.. I'm still dealing with the loss she was a big part of my life even though she lived so far away. Often just talking to someone, and telling her story to others, who she was will often help..

If not now, take it from those of us who have live through this, you don't have to do it alone.. and if you try, you will eventually have to share it with others eventually because that's all that seems to help..

good luck.. and i hope you washed good..

 

[jboy45]

I spent a half hour of my life today in front of the mirror scrubbing my penis with body wash. I'm positive that i have some combination of sexually transmitted diseases. Fmylife.

 

[ortiz34]

wish you luck bro, sorry for your loss

Try to make your mom proud, she's watching ya