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Disturbing trend amongst alot of young guys i know that got married.....

Erzulie said:
my kids by FAR

i've let many of things go due to their best interest, relationships, jobs, etc

They had no choice in their existance, I brought them here and its my responsibility to take care of them

I don't make my SO feel neglected, never did.. but in instances where its my kids are him its a no brainer that i will chose my kids.

Why in the fuck does that make me a bad person? You fucking men want a woman that will be a mentor, to take care of your kids, have them love them and mentor them.. and the first fucking second you get put on the back shelf so that we can tend to them you get all bent out of shape.

Grow the fuck up already.

They are innocent and young, not able to fend for theirselves, molding to what it is that they are surronded by, absorbing everything like a sponge.

If im a horrible person then so fucking beit, im horrible. My X was completetly happy with how i respected and treated him, despite having two kids. There is a time for everything and when kids are in the equation you tend to cast all other issues aside and deal with them first.

If i'd do otherwise i'd be a horrible mom by all of your standards.. its a fucking lose / lose situation

I never said that you're horrible. I was just asking a question. We all have different views on life. You have yours, I have mine and that's fine. You views (whatever they are) don't make you a bad person, nor do mine make me a bad person. We agree to disagree, no need for the name calling or the holier then thou propaganda.

Relax...it's just the Internet.
 
At some point your children have to learn to be independent. I know women who still make Dr. appointments for their twenty year olds. The sooner they learn responsibility the better, I was left alone by my parents when they went on dates at age twelve and I never fucked anything up. If you expect responsibility from your children you may actually get it. By always sacrificing for your children you are making them dependent, that's why 25 year olds are still living at home.
 
JavaGuru said:
Dr. Phil Disgarees and I know you women consider him the end all and be all of relationship analysis. He thinks women always putting their children first is destructive; He claims women should put themselves before their children on occasion. I know you're trained otherwise but he is the soccer mom guru. BTW, the fact you're having "so so" relationships with men says a lot, IMO.


i never said i had a 'so so' relationship with men... i said i've seen it happen

by the fucking way, my children have in two years met one of my SO'S that i was very involved with. and it was near a year before that happend

so, go and judge your 'so so ' relationships and not mine. I respect my kids to the upmost.

maybe you had the 'perfect' family life, but i didn't and my goal is to make a life for my kids that i DIDN'T have.

Don't fucking judge me you don't fucking know me as i don't you. READ what i write not just inbetween the lines

m'fucking K
 
EnderJE said:
I never said that you're horrible. I was just asking a question. We all have different views on life. You have yours, I have mine and that's fine. You views (whatever they are) don't make you a bad person, nor do mine make me a bad person. We agree to disagree, no need for the name calling or the holier then thou propaganda.

Relax...it's just the Internet.


oh hun, that entire message wasn't for you.

most of these fuckers don't have kids therefore have no idea
 
JavaGuru said:
At some point your children have to learn to be independent. I know women who still make Dr. appointments for their twenty year olds. The sooner they learn responsibility the better, I was left alone by my parents when they went on dates at age twelve and I never fucked anything up. If you expect responsibility from your children you may actually get it. By always sacrificing for your children you are making them dependent, that's why 25 year olds are still living at home.

I still make fucking Dr's appts for my X..... so what does that say?

I never neglected him or his needs.. NEVER!

BUT when it all boils down to it, WE together brought these kids into this world therefore to neglect them for ANY reason is just selfish.
 
so you are saying i should put my kids second to some man?


It DOESNT make you a bad person.. but it will make you alone. And until your children are grown and out of the house.. you will never have a great relationship with a man IMHO. You sound like a very bitter and very angry woman.

Of course its just message board posts.. so they are VERY easy to read incorrectly

but hey what do I know.. Ive been married 3 times and have had more long term relationships than most people on this thread combined.

I "might" just know a thing or two.. but then again maybe Im just an asshole man. right?

Oh and by the way... the VAST majority of marraige counselers and psychologists would agree with me.
 
Erzulie said:
i never said i had a 'so so' relationship with men... i said i've seen it happen

by the fucking way, my children have in two years met one of my SO'S that i was very involved with. and it was near a year before that happend

so, go and judge your 'so so ' relationships and not mine. I respect my kids to the upmost.

maybe you had the 'perfect' family life, but i didn't and my goal is to make a life for my kids that i DIDN'T have.

Don't fucking judge me you don't fucking know me as i don't you. READ what i write not just inbetween the lines

m'fucking K

It's not judgement, just observation...90% of the women I've dated over the last five years have been single mothers. It's not easy and I see way too much overcompensation, even from the fathers. I've had fathers claim how they "wish" they could discipline their child but feel guilty because of the seperation. Guess what, the kid ends up in juvenille court because everyone puts him first and doesn't do what's right.
 
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