yet another dating question. WHAT WOULD YOU DO

[pursuit]

Be friends with the new one for a while longer and do fun things "as friends"

 

[the nature boy]

threesome

 

[pitbullstl]

Hi.

Suppose you've been seeing someone about...let's say 4 months. You're exclusive with each other, but not engaged yet...in fact, those conversations have not even yet occured. But it's an exclusive relationship.

You're pretty happy with each other - not yet sure if this person is someone you can be REALLY serious with, but, so far....so good.

Then....

someone comes into your life in a casual or friendship way. You know pretty soon after meeting this person that you truly connect with them, and you sense that the feeling is mutual.

Because of your relationship, you keep things on the "up and up"....but this other person is pretty freaking cool.

What do you do?

Do you start seeing them surreptitiously? Do you end the other relationship? Or do you ignore this new person, even at the risk of missing something which could be really wonderful?

If you feel that *connection*, you would be a fool to let it go unattended. I was involved with somone when I first met my wife, the immediate attraction was almost too overwhelming....the night I met her we almost didn't connect.....but then she opened her mouth.........I haven't looked back since.

 

[The Shadow]

Hi.

Suppose you've been seeing someone about...let's say 4 months. You're exclusive with each other, but not engaged yet...in fact, those conversations have not even yet occured. But it's an exclusive relationship.

You're pretty happy with each other - not yet sure if this person is someone you can be REALLY serious with, but, so far....so good.

Then....

someone comes into your life in a casual or friendship way. You know pretty soon after meeting this person that you truly connect with them, and you sense that the feeling is mutual.

Because of your relationship, you keep things on the "up and up"....but this other person is pretty freaking cool.

What do you do?

Do you start seeing them surreptitiously? Do you end the other relationship? Or do you ignore this new person, even at the risk of missing something which could be really wonderful?

\


Follow your heart and nothing else...

 

[ChefWide]

C'mon, matt.

NO what if's. None. Follow your gut, use your head, listen to your heart.

Easy... or not.

 

[KillahBee]

I gotta disagree with the "follow your heart" guys. Sure, I am a jaded young man, but if it's one thing I have learned in my young life - following your heart will get you in trouble. I'll say this, follow your heart, but use your head too (most people can't do both).

 

[Lift Chief]

I would begin a relationship with the other one and try to balance both (of course it's hard to do, but figure it out - girls are not smart). keep it up until you figure outif the other girl is the real thing it that initial spark was just the danger/mystique thing going on.

Exactly.

 

[pitbullstl]

I gotta disagree with the "follow your heart" guys. Sure, I am a jaded young man, but if it's one thing I have learned in my young life - following your heart will get you in trouble. I'll say this, follow your heart, but use your head too (most people can't do both).

I dated enough (read way too fucking many) women before I met my wife to be subjective enough to KNOW both in my heart, and my head.......that this was it. The bottom line is.......when you meet THE ONE....you will know....but it won't do you a bit of good, if you're not ready.

I know I convey this awseome life here on EF.....due in no small part to the success that is my marriage/family life, but it's all for real...I count myself as one of the truly lucky ones, but luck isn't everything all relationships require hard work and dedication. I learned how to apply this in my marriage by watching the wondeful example that is my grandparents, and parents relationships. When you are ready....you'll know, and hopefully then and only then...."the one" will still be out there. True love doesn't happen for everyone, or if it does you/her may not have been ready to embrace it at that time, for those that are....there is nothing greater.

 

[pitbullstl]

Exactly.

Where the hell have you been??

 

[velvett]

I dated enough (read way too fucking many) women before I met my wife to be subjective enough to KNOW both in my heart, and my head.......that this was it. The bottom line is.......when you meet THE ONE....you will know....but it won't do you a bit of good, if you're not ready.

I think the whole concept of "the one" only stands to be perceived as real when the relationship continues to be healthy and positive.

When the relationship starts to sour and dies "the one" becomes "that F-ing bastard" and "money grubing whore".

It's all about perception.