Thanks lanky for all the info. Theres alot to read and digest there, I was just checkin in quickly today so I'll have a proper read of it later and come back with any Q's.
Just to clarify something for everyone, I'm not 20, I'm actually in my 30's, so well past puberty (unfortunately!). This is why I feel I need to 'catch up' cos if I was born with the right amount of T I would be ahead of where I am now.
chazk - I'm not scared that my E levels increasing would cause me to be more female per say. What I am concerned about is I don't want to bump my T up and then find that it has some kind of rebound effect which means I end up with more E and therefore lose all the muscle I've gained and then some. I already have the facial hair,muscle tone,jaw structure etc. I just want bigger muscles, I always have. Just like most guys who start training because they're skinny, I just want to add some more size. I love to lift...jesh I even plan my holidays around my gym schedual, its just that I have this added complication.
I'm concerned health-wise in terms of cancer etc caused by the fact I still have some female tissue i.e ovaries/cervix hidden in there and what the hormones will do long term. Which is why I want to research as much as I can to weigh it all up.
My Endo Doc is good and has been helpful in discussing my concerns, but he is chiefly concerned with making sure that the dose I am on is high enough to cause the masculinization but will also cause minimum risk (cancer, blood pressure, Polycythemia). He would see any increase for muscle building as 'cosmetic' and not medical, alot of non-lifters don't really get the whole muscle building thing do they. Also if he thinks I'm abusing the meds he might stop them, FTM treatment by the professionals is not always the best and I'd like to keep him onside.
I think this is a usful thread because there are lots of FTMs out there who lift, but most would prob not post on these kind of forums for fear of abuse. As for myself, well whatever it takes for me to find out what I need to know and if it helps to enlighten a few people in the process so much the better.
Opps gotta go..I'm late now..