So This is Why I havent been around...

[DiamondCutCows]

Well my wife of 4 years suddenly decided one day that she is too young (24) to be married and wants to start going clubbing and meeting new people.

We did get married very young, but Im mature enough for it, where she obviously is not.

Her reasoning is suspect if that. She told me she goes to lunch with a dude at work. I asked if he had her #, she said NO. Sure enough he calls five minutes later while she is in the shower and his # is already programmed in the phone.

Anyways, she has changed very much in the last few weeks and my marriage is over. I love nothing more than coming home to the same girl everynight and holding her while we sleep. Im just now trying to move on with my life...

FWIW, this has ruined my cycle. About a month ago I tore my deltoid and held weight (239) while I didnt lift, but in the last two weeks I have fallen down to 220ish. I cant eat or sleep, but I continue to hit the weights a few times a week.

She has been very mean to me also. She even admits that I did nothing to deserve this.

So why treat me like this???

Please dont move this MODS. C+C guys dont know me and wont give a crap...

 

[RADAR]

That sucks!
I have been wondering where you were!


RADAR

 

[Advisor_x]

Hold on bro....nothing more I can say.........

 

[~Lexy~]

Ohhh, That Is Real Sad. It Is The Bordom In The Relationship That Made Her Do It And She Seeks Adventure And Found It With Someone Else. Very Tough Situation. Try Working It Out Or Else Take A Break From Your Wife For A Little While, Give Her Time To Think. She Is Having Doubts About The Marriage B/c She Is Getting Attention From Others And Wonders If The Grass Is Greener On The Other Side, Which It Isn't Always.

 

[DIVISION]

Well my wife of 4 years suddenly decided one day that she is too young (24) to be married and wants to start going clubbing and meeting new people.

We did get married very young, but Im mature enough for it, where she obviously is not.

Her reasoning is suspect if that. She told me she goes to lunch with a dude at work. I asked if he had her #, she said NO. Sure enough he calls five minutes later while she is in the shower and his # is already programmed in the phone.

Anyways, she has changed very much in the last few weeks and my marriage is over. I love nothing more than coming home to the same girl everynight and holding her while we sleep. Im just now trying to move on with my life...

FWIW, this has ruined my cycle. About a month ago I tore my deltoid and held weight (239) while I didnt lift, but in the last two weeks I have fallen down to 220ish. I cant eat or sleep, but I continue to hit the weights a few times a week.

She has been very mean to me also. She even admits that I did nothing to deserve this.

So why treat me like this???

Please dont move this MODS. C+C guys dont know me and wont give a crap...

Here's my take on this, CowCutter.....


Anytime a woman cheats it's because she not being fullfilled in some way in her relationship. In this case, she feels that this guy at her work can give her something that you are not giving her. Her age is a big reason why she has decided to do this, women in their 20's aren't that mature relationship-wise and perhaps she feels that she is too young to settle down. That doesn't mean she didn't love you and have the best intentions when you first met. Things change, people change; her feelings for you have changed.

The reason she is being "mean" as you put it is because she feels some guilt because she's cheated and she doesn't like it, therefore her way of acting out is to be "mean" and treat you like shit. A woman in a relationship is like a soldier in war, it's kill or be killed and she has decided to kill you. There's nothing more for you to do and you don't owe her anything as she is the one who ended the relationship. In the future make sure any woman you commit to has some degree of maturity, or you may fall victim to the same fate.

One last thing: In relationships, women tend to be very self-protective, they think of their own emotions first and they will hurt you to avoid being hurt. Keep that in mind and you will be trouble free.



Sorry if this all seems blunt, but it's the only way I can be. I hope you understand.





DIV

 

[DiamondCutCows]

Here's my take on this, CowCutter.....


Anytime a woman cheats it's because she not being fullfilled in some way in her relationship. In this case, she feels that this guy at her work can give her something that you are not giving her. Her age is a big reason why she has decided to do this, women in their 20's aren't that mature relationship-wise and perhaps she feels that she is too young to settle down. That doesn't mean she didn't love you and have the best intentions when you first met. Things change, people change; her feelings for you have changed.

The reason she is being "mean" as you put it is because she feels some guilt because she's cheated and she doesn't like it, therefore her way of acting out is to be "mean" and treat you like shit. A woman in a relationship is like a soldier in war, it's kill or be killed and she has decided to kill you. There's nothing more for you to do and you don't owe her anything as she is the one who ended the relationship. In the future make sure any woman you commit to has some degree of maturity, or you may fall victim to the same fate.

One last thing: In relationships, women tend to be very self-protective, they think of their own emotions first and they will hurt you to avoid being hurt. Keep that in mind and you will be trouble free.



Sorry if this all seems blunt, but it's the only way I can be. I hope you understand.





DIV

Div, if you werent blunt, I'd be dissappointed. Its just strange to me. I basically fight girls off with a stick when I go out, so I feel Im attractive and I do treat her like a queen...You're right that I should be "trouble-free"

I just really love being married (If that makes any sense) and I really hate coming home to an empty apt. I cant explain it.

I feel like I should find a better girl ASAP so I dont have these lonely, depressing feelings, but I think I should be alone to straighten out my head/heart...

 

[~Lexy~]

Here's my take on this, CowCutter.....


Anytime a woman cheats it's because she not being fullfilled in some way in her relationship. In this case, she feels that this guy at her work can give her something that you are not giving her. Her age is a big reason why she has decided to do this, women in their 20's aren't that mature relationship-wise and perhaps she feels that she is too young to settle down. That doesn't mean she didn't love you and have the best intentions when you first met. Things change, people change; her feelings for you have changed.

The reason she is being "mean" as you put it is because she feels some guilt because she's cheated and she doesn't like it, therefore her way of acting out is to be "mean" and treat you like shit. A woman in a relationship is like a soldier in war, it's kill or be killed and she has decided to kill you. There's nothing more for you to do and you don't owe her anything as she is the one who ended the relationship. In the future make sure any woman you commit to has some degree of maturity, or you may fall victim to the same fate.

One last thing: In relationships, women tend to be very self-protective, they think of their own emotions first and they will hurt you to avoid being hurt. Keep that in mind and you will be trouble free.



Sorry if this all seems blunt, but it's the only way I can be. I hope you understand.





DIV

I agree with many points which you have raised in your post but I would not rule out a reconciliation between him and his wife. He shouldn't give up on the relationship so easily. In his situation I would go and talk to the guy who is making a move on his wife. Alert him to back off. There is a huge possibility that he doesn't know she is married.

 

[growthspurt]

I was wondering where you been hiding out Bro! Fucking women. I was married and had a kid young with my High school sweet-heart and I always thought I was more mature than her(she liked to pull alot of shit like your woman). We ended up getting divorced for more than a year but recently got back together. She finnally got her shit together and her priorities straight.
If it is meant to be, your girl will do the same. If not, Fuck Her! Keep your head up and keep on training! Watch you gear situation too(just in cse she is a little shit). Can't be too careful in situations like divorce or break-ups.
Feel free to drop me a pm if you ever need to B.S., I've been there Bro!

 

[DIVISION]

Div, if you werent blunt, I'd be dissappointed. Its just strange to me. I basically fight girls off with a stick when I go out, so I feel Im attractive and I do treat her like a queen...You're right that I should be "trouble-free"

I just really love being married (If that makes any sense) and I really hate coming home to an empty apt. I cant explain it.

I feel like I should find a better girl ASAP so I dont have these lonely, depressing feelings, but I think I should be alone to straighten out my head/heart...

Listen, bro.

Sounds to me like you were too nice and accommodating to your wife and she took it for granted. Women who are immature don't appreciate a nice guy and the way he treats her, thus they cheat. That goes along with the true saying that women love guys who treat them like shit. Immature women need the drama in order to validate themselves in a relationship.

I've seen this before in many relationships. It's up to you obviously whether you want to salvage your marriage, but for your own sense of pride I would drop the bitch like she's hot and enjoy being single again. I know you seem like the type of guy who feels somewhat incomplete without a woman, but trust me there are plenty of women who WILL appreciate the love and companionship you have to give.

Let her deal with the choice she's made and move on with your life. Things will never be the same, and there's no turning back. Trust me on that, man.

When you give a woman your heart and she tramples on it, there is no coming back from that type of betrayal.

I wish you the best and if you want to talk or have questions, by all means PM me.






DIV

 

[rodneyabs]

1. she's a lying whore. This affair has been going on behind your back for quite some time now, and it is NOT new.

2. you can do better

3. go to NoMarriage dot com. American women are lying, cheating, scandilous whores. They get rewarded for cheating (divorce settlement) and their role models are paris hilton and "desperate housewives". No wonder divorce is at record highs, and the women here suck.

 

[smaretick]

Sorry to hear about your troubles...hope things get better for you.

 

[~Lexy~]

1. she's a lying whore. This affair has been going on behind your back for quite some time now, and it is NOT new.

2. you can do better

3. go to NoMarriage dot com. American women are lying, cheating, scandilous whores. They get rewarded for cheating (divorce settlement) and their role models are paris hilton and "desperate housewives". No wonder divorce is at record highs, and the women here suck.

Not all American women are whores, I will pretend you made a spelling mistake this time.

 

[DIVISION]

I agree with many points which you have raised in your post but I would not rule out a reconciliation between him and his wife. He shouldn't give up on the relationship so easily.

I frankly don't care whether you agree with my points or not. I'm here to give him advice from a male's perspective on women and why they do what they do. She cheated and I think it's best he moves on.

Once a woman cheats, in my eyes she's tainted. I'd never get back with a woman who cheated on me. I just can't see her the same way again, either emotionally or physically......once another guy's pounded her, I don't consider her mine anymore.

That's just the way it is.






DIV

 

[DiamondCutCows]

I frankly don't care whether you agree with my points or not. I'm here to give him advice from a male's perspective on women and why they do what they do. She cheated and I think it's best he moves on.

Once a woman cheats, in my eyes she's tainted. I'd never get back with a woman who cheated on me. I just can't see her the same way again, either emotionally or physically......once another guy's pounded her, I don't consider her mine anymore.

That's just the way it is.






DIV

It hurts, but I think I agree.

 

[~Lexy~]

I frankly don't care whether you agree with my points or not. I'm here to give him advice from a male's perspective on women and why they do what they do. She cheated and I think it's best he moves on.

DIV

I am sorry but why so defensive about me agreeing with you? It is only a conversation and my post was not meant to be personally against anyone. Take a step back and reflect at your tone of writing please especially in this situation.
You have some anger issues inside of you and you need to adjust them to the appropriate person, time and place. Now lets start again: (me extanding hand)
-Hi I am Lexy, thanks for the green dots! and you are?

 

[DIVISION]

It hurts, but I think I agree.

.....and it will hurt for some time to come, CowCutter.

As you said before, you've got no problem attracting women, so I say go with it and just spend some time having fun with various women.

Being single is not so bad, bro. You have unlimited freedom and you can date as many women as you want.

This relationship as you knew it is over, it's been over for some time now, just that you were the last to know.







DIV

 

[mendo]

I agree with many points which you have raised in your post but I would not rule out a reconciliation between him and his wife. He shouldn't give up on the relationship so easily. In his situation I would go and talk to the guy who is making a move on his wife. Alert him to back off. There is a huge possibility that he doesn't know she is married.

Sure, this other dude should never have gone there...and should be made to see that. But fuck em - thats not the real problem here...its 100% the wife. Shes a backstabber, and I agree with DIV...there is no future with her...no trust...its over.

I lived through this same situation the Xmass before last, and I can tell you first hand...things will look up bro! Just focus on yourself and have fun for awhile, and stay positive during the hard times. Don't give anyone your heart till you'reready...and you know they are. I ended up a much stronger person after I had been through that. I see things differently now...and my only regret is the wasted time (6 years).

Peace.

 

[DIVISION]

Sure, this other dude should never have gone there...and should be made to see that. But fuck em - thats not the real problem here...its 100% the wife. Shes a backstabber, and I agree with DIV...there is no future with her...no trust...its over.

I lived through this same situation the Xmass before last, and I can tell you first hand...things will look up bro! Just focus on yourself and have fun for awhile, and stay positive during the hard times. Don't give anyone your heart till you'reready...and you know they are. I ended up a much stronger person after I had been through that. I see things differently now...and my only regret is the wasted time (6 years).

Peace.

eh Mendocito,

The thing I don't understand is how guys don't see the warning signs until it's too late? Six years in your case is a long time to know someone in a relationship and not see subtle changes in behaviour.

Explain.




DIV

 

[mendo]

eh Mendocito,

The thing I don't understand is how guys don't see the warning signs until it's too late? Six years in your case is a long time to know someone in a relationship and not see subtle changes in behaviour.

Explain.




DIV

Yep...that was one of my lessons. The changes came a couple months before the main events...but I was naive and blinded by an immature love. I guess I knew something was changing...but my eyes weren't truly open...not yet.

 

[Pamela]

Here's my take on this, CowCutter.....


Anytime a woman cheats it's because she not being fullfilled in some way in her relationship. In this case, she feels that this guy at her work can give her something that you are not giving her.
DIV

I agree with Div on this point.

 

[DIVISION]

Yep...that was one of my lessons. The changes came a couple months before the main events...but I was naive and blinded by an immature love. I guess I knew something was changing...but my eyes weren't truly open...not yet.

I think most guys don't have high enough standards with women they are looking at as "marriage material".

Some women just aren't the type you should marry, and it comes across in their behaviour and attitude. These things aren't really hard to read if you know what to look for.

Every guy has to have standards when it comes to women.





DIV

 

[DiamondCutCows]

I agree with Div on this point.

In our case, the only thing she doesnt get from me is a slap in the face. She is treated like gold by me.

Maybe she wants to be treated badly, who knows. Who cares. I just cant wait till I walk in my house and dont have an empty feeling.

I walk in and Im like "what now." Usually it would be "Hey Jess, wanna get a movie on-demand with dinner?"

Now its just me and Sportscenter...

My friends girl thinks I should be alone for a bit to "let my heart/nead heal" Any thoughts on that???

 

[mendo]

I think most guys don't have high enough standards with women they are looking at as "marriage material".

Some women just aren't the type you should marry, and it comes across in their behaviour and attitude. These things aren't really hard to read if you know what to look for.

Every guy has to have standards when it comes to women.





DIV

I agree. I also think age has alot to do with it. Not a persons biological age...but their mental age...where they're at in their head. Many women become more stable and honest as they get older and realize what they want long term. ...though not all by any means.

 

[mendo]

In our case, the only thing she doesnt get from me is a slap in the face. She is treated like gold by me.

Maybe she wants to be treated badly, who knows. Who cares. I just cant wait till I walk in my house and dont have an empty feeling.

I walk in and Im like "what now." Usually it would be "Hey Jess, wanna get a movie on-demand with dinner?"

Now its just me and Sportscenter...

My friends girl thinks I should be alone for a bit to "let my heart/nead heal" Any thoughts on that???

I hope this makes sense, but that empty feeling is all in your head bro. You don't need a woman to fill it. After years in a relationship...then a year with some shitty roomates...I wanted an empty house. Now I just like to have friends over or bring a date home...thats it for awhile for me.

 

[DiamondCutCows]

I agree. I also think age has alot to do with it. Not a persons biological age...but their mental age...where they're at in their head. Many women become more stable and honest as they get older and realize what they want long term. ...though not all by any means.

Sounds about right.

My mental age must be 30ish because I love married life the way it was before. Im a great husband and cant till I find a WOMAN who appreciates the fact that I pride myself on treating women greatly.

Though, it'll probably be quite a while before I give my heart away again

 

[nutsnack]

best way to get over an old girl .... get a new one

there's millions out there and that one obviously ain't for you so keep your head up and get another one!

 

[DIVISION]

I agree. I also think age has alot to do with it. Not a persons biological age...but their mental age...where they're at in their head. Many women become more stable and honest as they get older and realize what they want long term. ...though not all by any means.

That goes along with what I said about women in their 20's not being mature enough for marriage. In my experience, women in their 20's are still in "play mode" where everything is still a game without consequences. I think women in their 30's are stable and able to know what they want, thus it's easier to deal with them and have a level of mutual understanding.

That said, you then have the problem of whether you want a woman in her 30's if you are in your 20's......it's a trade-off. It all depends on how picky you are.



DIV

 

[mendo]

That goes along with what I said about women in their 20's not being mature enough for marriage. In my experience, women in their 20's are still in "play mode" where everything is still a game without consequences. I think women in their 30's are stable and able to know what they want, thus it's easier to deal with them and have a level of mutual understanding.

That said, you then have the problem of whether you want a woman in her 30's if you are in your 20's......it's a trade-off. It all depends on how picky you are.



DIV

Most definately. Although we are talking about relationships...and DCC...I think what you need right now is GIRLS. Maybe 2 or 3 of em... Just for fun.

 

[DiamondCutCows]

For some reason Im thinking "Wow life really is funny"


I really believed me and her would grow together, have kids move to FL or Dallas and happilly ever after.

I guess I'll take Dennis Leary's quote for real now!

"Life is hard, get a helmet"

 

[DIVISION]

I think what you need right now is GIRLS. Maybe 2 or 3 of em... Just for fun.

Exactly.

I think it's time for CowCutter to flip the switch to "MashMode".......

It's time for him to crush some serious gutz.....

Balls Deep.






DIV

 

[The Terminator]

I feel like I should find a better girl ASAP so I dont have these lonely, depressing feelings, but I think I should be alone to straighten out my head/heart...

That is possibly the best thing to do (of course NOT what I would do ...But I am absolutely retarded when it comes to 'relationships' so its best NOT to listen to what I say )

 

[DIVISION]

That is possibly the best thing to do (of course NOT what I would do ...But I am absolutely retarded when it comes to 'relationships' so its best NOT to listen to what I say )

Termie, you're not helping here.........






DIV

 

[The Terminator]

Termie, you're not helping here.........

I KNOW ANABOLICS

I DONT know how to keep a relationship
(but I'm learning...)

 

[Excidium28]

You need a rebound bro ASAP. If it was me, I'd beat that guys ass for breakin up a mirrage (it would make me feel better, im sure she's the one to blame).

 

[The Terminator]

You need a rebound bro ASAP. If it was me, I'd beat that guys ass for breakin up a mirrage (it would make me feel better, im sure she's the one to blame).

I like that idea too

 

[Excidium28]

While your at it, kick her out (or is she on the lease too?) if so than I would bring a cople girls home, just to hang out. Show her how fine of a ketch she's got (I read this in cosmo). Maybe leave a condom wraper by the bed. Dont come home for 2 nights, tell her ur workin late.

 

[DiamondCutCows]

While your at it, kick her out (or is she on the lease too?) if so than I would bring a cople girls home, just to hang out. Show her how fine of a ketch she's got (I read this in cosmo). Maybe leave a condom wraper by the bed. Dont come home for 2 nights, tell her ur workin late.

She is on the lease, but Im trying to work with her to leave. I dont speak with ANY of my family, so I really have nowhere that I can go.

If she just leaves than I can begin the rebound from all this. Its very hard getting over this with her laying there next to me acting like Im not here.

She seemed like she was crazy about me just a few weeks ago.

 

[Excidium28]

As far as being gone for 2 nights, I didnt mean family. Find some hoe and party, sleep at her place for 2 nights, maybe ex girlfriend? Do you still pay the same amount of attention to her as u use to before u found out she was having lunch with some dude from her work? How did your actions towards her change after u found this out? If it was me once some shit like that happens, I will never be able to trust that person ever again, so I would try and make their life as miserable as I can.

 

[mendo]

She is on the lease, but Im trying to work with her to leave. I dont speak with ANY of my family, so I really have nowhere that I can go.

If she just leaves than I can begin the rebound from all this. Its very hard getting over this with her laying there next to me acting like Im not here.

She seemed like she was crazy about me just a few weeks ago.

This is where nice guys can get screwed. Be careful. I had to endure a month before my ex moved out. All I can say is...don't get sucked into any games. You're not hers anymore, and you need to make sure she knows that. Keep your distance as much as possible.

Whatever you do...don't have sex with her...or let her convince you to take her back. Its over.


Thats my advice.

 

[Excidium28]

This is where nice guys can get screwed. Be careful. I had to endure a month before my ex moved out. All I can say is...don't get sucked into any games. You're not hers anymore, and you need to make sure she knows that. Keep your distance as much as possible.

Whatever you do...don't have sex with her...or let her convince you to take her back. Its over.

Thats my advice.

word

 

[sparetire]

Let me ask you this.. was your wife ever physically or sexually abused as a child? Or let me ask you this, how's the marriage of her parents? Is daddy still around ? Is he married to her mom still? A lot of girls will act out in chaotic ways reinacting trauma from their past. They do this to fullfill a need to "fix" something from the past. I bet you know the answer to this, and if not, I'd dig deeper. We all haven't had perfect childhoods, but man, when you screw with a girl , sexually, physically, mentally in their childhood, they sure as hell act out later in life. Most likely, I'd bet dad and mom had a divorce sometime and she's acting out now because she's getting to close to you and it feels uncomfortable, so she needs to cause chaos. If she doesn't want to go to marriage counseling and then probably therapy, she's not worth it. And yes, you probably did get married to young. Hope this sheds some light on it..

 

[DiamondCutCows]

Let me ask you this.. was your wife ever physically or sexually abused as a child? Or let me ask you this, how's the marriage of her parents? Is daddy still around ? Is he married to her mom still? A lot of girls will act out in chaotic ways reinacting trauma from their past. They do this to fullfill a need to "fix" something from the past. I bet you know the answer to this, and if not, I'd dig deeper. We all haven't had perfect childhoods, but man, when you screw with a girl , sexually, physically, mentally in their childhood, they sure as hell act out later in life. Most likely, I'd bet dad and mom had a divorce sometime and she's acting out now because she's getting to close to you and it feels uncomfortable, so she needs to cause chaos. If she doesn't want to go to marriage counseling and then probably therapy, she's not worth it. And yes, you probably did get married to young. Hope this sheds some light on it..

Interesting, she was raped at about 14-15yrs and her dad is a step dad. I'll agree that SHE got married to young though. I didnt. I enjoy being a husband and wish none of this nonsense ruined it for us.

I'll move on and be ok, eventually

 

[uglyass]

Hope it works out for you bro, you sound like a decent guy.

You'll train better when you're single anyway as you can stay in the gym all night!

UglyASS

 

[BIGJAKE]

Here's my take on this, CowCutter.....


Anytime a woman cheats it's because she not being fullfilled in some way in her relationship. In this case, she feels that this guy at her work can give her something that you are not giving her. Her age is a big reason why she has decided to do this, women in their 20's aren't that mature relationship-wise and perhaps she feels that she is too young to settle down. That doesn't mean she didn't love you and have the best intentions when you first met. Things change, people change; her feelings for you have changed.

The reason she is being "mean" as you put it is because she feels some guilt because she's cheated and she doesn't like it, therefore her way of acting out is to be "mean" and treat you like shit. A woman in a relationship is like a soldier in war, it's kill or be killed and she has decided to kill you. There's nothing more for you to do and you don't owe her anything as she is the one who ended the relationship. In the future make sure any woman you commit to has some degree of maturity, or you may fall victim to the same fate.

One last thing: In relationships, women tend to be very self-protective, they think of their own emotions first and they will hurt you to avoid being hurt. Keep that in mind and you will be trouble free.



Sorry if this all seems blunt, but it's the only way I can be. I hope you understand.





DIV

I would have to say Div. nailed it down here. Sorry to here of this Bro.

 

[CrazyK]

I frankly don't care whether you agree with my points or not. I'm here to give him advice from a male's perspective on women and why they do what they do. She cheated and I think it's best he moves on.

Once a woman cheats, in my eyes she's tainted. I'd never get back with a woman who cheated on me. I just can't see her the same way again, either emotionally or physically......once another guy's pounded her, I don't consider her mine anymore.

That's just the way it is.






DIV

I'd fucking slit a bitches throat if she cheated on me.

 

[CrazyK]

Interesting, she was raped at about 14-15yrs and her dad is a step dad. I'll agree that SHE got married to young though. I didnt. I enjoy being a husband and wish none of this nonsense ruined it for us.

I'll move on and be ok, eventually

Yeah bro, just move on. Sucks that she came from such a messed up upbringing, but stay away from those women man, they have deeper issues than you can ever imagine, and it's not your job to play psychiatrist.

 

[DIVISION]

I'd fucking slit a bitches throat if she cheated on me.

When they turn out the lights I'll be there in the dark, thuggin' eternal through my heart......

Hail Mary...






DIV

 

[Steve The Bluesman]

Well my wife of 4 years suddenly decided one day that she is too young (24) to be married and wants to start going clubbing and meeting new people.

We did get married very young, but Im mature enough for it, where she obviously is not.

Her reasoning is suspect if that. She told me she goes to lunch with a dude at work. I asked if he had her #, she said NO. Sure enough he calls five minutes later while she is in the shower and his # is already programmed in the phone.

Anyways, she has changed very much in the last few weeks and my marriage is over. I love nothing more than coming home to the same girl everynight and holding her while we sleep. Im just now trying to move on with my life...

FWIW, this has ruined my cycle. About a month ago I tore my deltoid and held weight (239) while I didnt lift, but in the last two weeks I have fallen down to 220ish. I cant eat or sleep, but I continue to hit the weights a few times a week.

She has been very mean to me also. She even admits that I did nothing to deserve this.

So why treat me like this???

Please dont move this MODS. C+C guys dont know me and wont give a crap...

Wow. You have an ugly few months to get through - but once you get past the mess, there will be light at the other end.

Forget revenge, forget the past, learn the lesson and become a better man for it.

Best of luck bro.


Bluesman

 

[sweed]

really sorry to hear all this bro... I am shocked to hear this from you telling me before about her. I hope everything goes well and when you're feelin better, take a trip down to my work (u remember where i work rght ) and party up to find some new friends. i hope you feel better soon. it always hurts for a little while, but then u get past that to see the real truth about people..

 

[krishna]

She betrayed you bro. Even if she wanted you back, best to move on. It will never be the same anyway. Four years is a long time, but do your best to start moving on; it's for the best. Who gives a shit why that bitch fucked you over, point is SHE DID! She isn't worth a second glance anymore. Just start ignoring her from here on out, that will hurt her the most, plus help you move on. Plenty of women out there bro, if you ask me, marriage is usually a mistake.

 

[PatBateman3]

Sorry to hear bro. I agree with Div's point about the age of the woman having something to do with behavior (and in your case the rape may play a card too). For the most part, he's right, women in their 20's are complete head-cases, have no clue what they want out of life, LOVE to play games, and love to party. There are always exceptions to the rule, I've found a couple great younger women to date who were mature just because their situations forced them to grow up at a very young age.

In terms of what to do know? I was engaged not to long ago and through a series of bad decisions by me (commitment-phobe related stuff), it ended. After that, I started going to the gym a lot more and became a machine on auto-pilot (with my emotions too, which is bad). I say, find something to throw all of your heart and energy into and it will distract you from the pain for right now while it's at its peak. Best of luck.

 

[WannaBeBig72]

Here's my take on this, CowCutter.....

Anytime a woman cheats it's because she not being fullfilled in some way in her relationship. In this case, she feels that this guy at her work can give her something that you are not giving her.


DIV

I think this is bullshit, and I don't think you can make this kind of judgement based on the limited info you're getting. Just because she is cheating doesn't mean that CowCutter isn't giving her something that she wants and that the guy she is cheating with is. Sometimes we read into things or try to make sense of something when there's really nothing to make sense of. It is what it is. She probably was too young for marriage. She realized this now at the age of 24 when her friends are running around, clubbing, dropping ecstacy and living the "wild" life. It sounds like she never had the opportunity to do this and now might need to get it out of her system (some people never have to..some people do...I happen to be one of the people that did need to get this out of my system). This is not something that ANY man can give her. She will eventually realize that the "crazy party" life is really pretty empty and that there are alot of people that will treat you like shit out there (male and female) and might eventually come to regret her decision to leave you. It's quite difficult to find a good healthy relationship. She will find this out in due time.

 

[split endz]

Sorry to hear bro. There's some good advice in this thread, but the thing is we are all different. What it takes for you to get through this depends on what makes you tick. Do you need some time alone for closure ?... probably. Should you bang some random ho's for revenge ?... Sometimes that helps, but if your mind is totally on her, it doesn't really mean much. I agree that you should try to get out & hang with other people as much as you can, but if you're not there mentally, it just doesn't seem to help me. If you can become involved mentally in anything, wheather it be workouts, sports, work, whatever, that is what you should do. If your body needs to mourn, it will mourn. Hard cold facts, but that's the way it has always been for me. I wish you well, and there is something about your tone in this thread that tells me you will be happy again soon, you sound strong inside. You also sound like a desireable catch to women, which makes things easier when you are ready to move on.

 

[DIVISION]

I think this is bullshit, and I don't think you can make this kind of judgement based on the limited info you're getting. Just because she is cheating doesn't mean that CowCutter isn't giving her something that she wants and that the guy she is cheating with is. Sometimes we read into things or try to make sense of something when there's really nothing to make sense of. It is what it is. She probably was too young for marriage. She realized this now at the age of 24 when her friends are running around, clubbing, dropping ecstacy and living the "wild" life. It sounds like she never had the opportunity to do this and now might need to get it out of her system (some people never have to..some people do...I happen to be one of the people that did need to get this out of my system). This is not something that ANY man can give her. She will eventually realize that the "crazy party" life is really pretty empty and that there are alot of people that will treat you like shit out there (male and female) and might eventually come to regret her decision to leave you. It's quite difficult to find a good healthy relationship. She will find this out in due time.

eh, Wannabe....call it what ya' want, I care less.......I don't need specifics to make basic judgement calls on human behaviour. Especially when it comes to relationships.

I already outline the probable reasons for her cheating behaviour.

There's no reason to delve back in to it.

I just hope he learns from this and is more discerning with the women he chooses in the future.

Women with a past history of abuse should raise warning flags ALWAYS.






DIV

 

[WannaBeBig72]

eh, Wannabe....call it what ya' want, I care less.......I don't need specifics to make basic judgement calls on human behaviour. Especially when it comes to relationships.

I already outline the probable reasons for her cheating behaviour.

There's no reason to delve back in to it.

I just hope he learns from this and is more discerning with the women he chooses in the future.

Women with a past history of abuse should raise warning flags ALWAYS.



DIV

Yes defenitely a red flag. Women like this often times have no idea what the fuck they want. They're confused. Sometimes it is "they want what they can't have". Or their self esteem is so low that they can't have any respect for the person that loves them or treats them right.

 

[Triple-G]

She will eventually realize that the "crazy party" life is really pretty empty and that there are alot of people that will treat you like shit out there (male and female) and might eventually come to regret her decision to leave you. It's quite difficult to find a good healthy relationship. She will find this out in due time.

but then it will be too late... didn't we have a story like this a couple of months ago with Lestat (sp?), his girl was a similar age and she left him because "she wanted to experience a bad first date" or so? i generally don't consider young girls (twentysomethings) to be marriage material anyway.

 

[Madcow2]

It's immaturity - there are tons of women out there who would do anything to find a good committed man that they are compatible with. Believe me, it's a valuable commodity and I've known a ton of smart successful attractive women who can't find a decent guy to save their lives.

It's nothing you did and nothing you could have foreseen other than realizing that people do a lot of changing in their late teens and early twenties so average risk is higher.

Sometimes the most valuable lessons in life are the hardest to learn and sometimes an incredible journey begins with a rough breaking. It's hard to see the light when you are in the middle of a dark tunnel, but it's there. Keep you head up. Keep your mind clear - getting some counseling or talking to someone is not a weak thing, it just flat out helps to be able to talk to someone who isn't invovlved with your problem and explaining things in plain english can make you see more clearly. And put on foot in front of the other. Life may rock your boat sometimes but make sure it takes a 100 year storm to sink you.

 

[PatBateman3]

but then it will be too late... didn't we have a story like this a couple of months ago with Lestat (sp?), his girl was a similar age and she left him because "she wanted to experience a bad first date" or so? i generally don't consider young girls (twentysomethings) to be marriage material anyway.

Yeah, when I went back and re-read the ages and time of marriage, I noticed she got married when she was 20. I wouldn't marry a 20 year old if you put a gun to my head. Not when I'm in my 20s, 30s, 40s, ever....There might be a few 20 year olds out there that are real, true marriage material, but finding them is near-impossible. Too much of a risk imho.

 

[DIVISION]

but then it will be too late... didn't we have a story like this a couple of months ago with Lestat (sp?), his girl was a similar age and she left him because "she wanted to experience a bad first date" or so? i generally don't consider young girls (twentysomethings) to be marriage material anyway.

Eh, TripleNugg.....don't bring Lestat in to this......

That crazy nugga is a whole 'nother story! There was more to his situation than a girl simply leaving for greener pastures. The dude was stalking her after she left......which leads me to believe that there was more to his behaviour which led her to leave in the first place.

Lestat is in another category. Trust me.






DIV

 

[DIVISION]

It's immaturity - there are tons of women out there who would do anything to find a good committed man that they are compatible with. Believe me, it's a valuable commodity and I've known a ton of smart successful attractive women who can't find a decent guy to save their lives.

There's a reason why they're still single. There is always a reason. Trust me, MadcowMania. Either mentally or physically there is something that is off.



DIV

 

[BOOEY]

Stay strong bro. Go pump some iron, then go pump some sluts. I would have kicked her out the day I found I out - lease or no lease.

 

[DIVISION]

I would have kicked her out the day I found I out - lease or no lease.

I agree with this.

Considering she committed adultery, I wonder how the divorce proceedings will go?



DIV

 

[lefler]

Something just like is happened between my sister and her husband. She was cheating on him with all kinds of younger guys then finally found one she liked. She was with him for a while (after she broke it off with her husband). He would go over to her house and see this guy playing with his daughter….drove him insane! Her husband was a wreck, but once he found a chick, it turned the tables. She wanted him back so bad and it was too late for him. However, it was her time to be miserable.

IMO you MUST make her life miserable also. It’s obvious you are hurting bad and she shouldn’t get away scott free with that. Find a chick to bring back and fuck the shit out of!!!

Right now she is sitting in the driver’s seat even though she is the whore! She has her new man, and her husband (which I guarantee she still has feelings for) is just sitting around the apartment sulking…..just what she wants!!! She has COMPLETE control of the whole situation……

Throw a wrench in her game!!!!

 

[DIVISION]

Something just like is happened between my sister and her husband. She was cheating on him with all kinds of younger guys then finally found one she liked. She was with him for a while (after she broke it off with her husband). He would go over to her house and see this guy playing with his daughter….drove him insane! Her husband was a wreck, but once he found a chick, it turned the tables. She wanted him back so bad and it was too late for him. However, it was her time to be miserable.

IMO you MUST make her life miserable also. It’s obvious you are hurting bad and she shouldn’t get away scott free with that. Find a chick to bring back and fuck the shit out of!!!

Right now she is sitting in the driver’s seat even though she is the whore! She has her new man, and her husband (which I guarantee she still has feelings for) is just sitting around the apartment sulking…..just what she wants!!! She has COMPLETE control of the whole situation……

Throw a wrench in her game!!!!

I'm glad you have a grasp of the situation, Lefler....

Just too bad most guys don't understand how these thangs work.

Women and their games....to win the game, you have to be above the game.



DIV

 

[ortiz34]

Massachusetts is a no fault state, so you cannot file for divorce on grounds of adultry.

Pretty pathetic if you ask me.

 

[DIVISION]

Massachusetts is a no fault state, so you cannot file for divorce on grounds of adultry.

Pretty pathetic if you ask me.

How the fuck does that work out? If she cheats noone is at fault?

Explain.




DIV

 

[krishna]

It's a matter of self-respect now. If you go back with her, she will have stripped it from you. If it was true love, and meant to be, she would of never cheated on you in the first place. At least don't let her take your dignity. End it in your mind and it will help you. You may even find some release. At the same time, if you truely do this, she will see it and it will eat at her. Don't let that bother you, she deserves it. The second you give in, you're her ragdoll and you have no more dignity. You're in charge of your life now. Utilize your new found freedom to do what's best for you.

 

[mendo]

It's a matter of self-respect now. If you go back with her, she will have stripped it from you. If it was true love, and meant to be, she would of never cheated on you in the first place. At least don't let her take your dignity. End it in your mind and it will help you. You may even find some release. At the same time, if you truely do this, she will see it and it will eat at her. Don't let that bother you, she deserves it. The second you give in, you're her ragdoll and you have no more dignity. You're in charge of your life now. Utilize your new found freedom to do what's best for you.

Very good post. And I'll say it one last time...whats best for you - is pussy.

 

[Apexx]

DCC,
This thread has been up less than 12 hours and there are already four pages of responses. That alone shows you that we ALL support you here on elite.

Everyone is going to tell you to just move on......easier said than done right.
Whether you need to laugh or cry, we're all here for you.....now toughen up and go bang her best friend.

Apexx

 

[DIVISION]

It's a matter of self-respect now. If you go back with her, she will have stripped it from you. If it was true love, and meant to be, she would of never cheated on you in the first place. At least don't let her take your dignity. End it in your mind and it will help you. You may even find some release. At the same time, if you truely do this, she will see it and it will eat at her. Don't let that bother you, she deserves it. The second you give in, you're her ragdoll and you have no more dignity. You're in charge of your life now. Utilize your new found freedom to do what's best for you.

I agree.

That's why I said it's over........there's no turning back.




DIV

 

[satchboogie]

i feel your pain bro..

love is the strongest feeling...
when healthy, its like a permenant fix.
when not healthy, its like suicide...

stay strong bro is all i can say..

 

[sweed]

Massachusetts is a no fault state, so you cannot file for divorce on grounds of adultry.

Pretty pathetic if you ask me.

ya it is. i didn;t know that.
I hope u get on here soon bro to talk with us

 

[tiger88]

Please dont move this MODS. C+C guys dont know me and wont give a crap...

ya move this to the spanish forum

 

[DIVISION]

ya move this to the spanish forum

Mormon strippers in Scottsdale........only in Phoenix!

If I ever meet this bitch I'll shove that Book of Mormon up her twat.




DIV

 

[The_Chemist]

This is something that Ironmaster PM'd me. Ive posted this many times before, and it helped me through the toughest time of my life.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I've said this several times, so I'm not sure which post you mean. But, yes, I've been through life's ups and downs. My first marriage ended badly, I've had successes and failures in business, I've fought the battles of raising teenagers, lost loved ones......this shit just happens if you live long enough.
The one constant thing in my life has been the training. The gym is a place of truth and honor. The iron and steel is always there waiting for you, and always gives back exactly what you put in. The determination, sacrifice and hardwork required to be successful there will spill over into all your endeavors in life.
Yes, women and money and friends come and go, but a 45lb. plate always weighs 45lbs.
When things are in the shitter, I've always just renewed my dedication to training and the brotherhood we all share. And you know, things always get better.
My second wife is great.....shares my interest in enhanced training, cooks my food just right, is a great mom to our 5 sons, and is much younger and prettier than I deserve.......but if it went down the dumper tomorrow, I'm still going to the gym.
Hang in there, man, it'll be ok.

IM

 

[Meat_head]

I feel for you bro. I've been caught in a situation similar though not marriage thats a whole nother level. For me it felt like the pain gets worse every day. Believe me it gets better eventually. There is light up ahead. Go bang other chicks. Live it up. You be laughing when she comes back around for you and your not there.

 

[bw1]

Well my wife of 4 years suddenly decided one day that she is too young (24) to be married and wants to start going clubbing and meeting new people.

We did get married very young, but Im mature enough for it, where she obviously is not.

Her reasoning is suspect if that. She told me she goes to lunch with a dude at work. I asked if he had her #, she said NO. Sure enough he calls five minutes later while she is in the shower and his # is already programmed in the phone.

Anyways, she has changed very much in the last few weeks and my marriage is over. I love nothing more than coming home to the same girl everynight and holding her while we sleep. Im just now trying to move on with my life...

FWIW, this has ruined my cycle. About a month ago I tore my deltoid and held weight (239) while I didnt lift, but in the last two weeks I have fallen down to 220ish. I cant eat or sleep, but I continue to hit the weights a few times a week.

She has been very mean to me also. She even admits that I did nothing to deserve this.

So why treat me like this???

Please dont move this MODS. C+C guys dont know me and wont give a crap...

That suck bro, at least there's no kids involved. I know it's hard but, move on you'll be glad you did.

 

[ortiz34]

No fault state means you CANNOT file for divorce on grounds of adultry. There is probably only 4-5 states left that you can file for cheating.

I know this because I just got divorced in Massachueseets 14 days ago for the SAME reason this gentlemen is getting divorced.

To the original poster, this will be one of the toughest battles of your life, but you will become a stronger person. Like alot of fellow posters here have advised, pump some iron and pump some b%tches like there is no tommmorow.

 

[shamrock11]

Sorry about your bad luck. It's her loss man, move on. She cheated and lied, you'll never look at her the same and your relationship would never be as you know it now.

 

[PatBateman3]

Also, and this might not even help, but maybe you can take solace in knowing you had no control over this and did all that you could do. As long as there wasn't some reason pertaining to you why she did the things she did (i.e. had you been abusive, etc, which it seems you definitely were the opposite), then you really have nothing to be ashamed about or look back and honestly have to say, "I should have treated her differently." It was out of your control.

I myself had the complete opposite situation to yours. I wasted one of the best girls out there and not a day goes by where I wish I had acted differently, treated her better, given her the commitment she wanted. So just know that unlike some of us, you gave it your best shot.

 

[Slydog]

This is something that Ironmaster PM'd me. Ive posted this many times before, and it helped me through the toughest time of my life.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I've said this several times, so I'm not sure which post you mean. But, yes, I've been through life's ups and downs. My first marriage ended badly, I've had successes and failures in business, I've fought the battles of raising teenagers, lost loved ones......this shit just happens if you live long enough.
The one constant thing in my life has been the training. The gym is a place of truth and honor. The iron and steel is always there waiting for you, and always gives back exactly what you put in. The determination, sacrifice and hardwork required to be successful there will spill over into all your endeavors in life.
Yes, women and money and friends come and go, but a 45lb. plate always weighs 45lbs.
When things are in the shitter, I've always just renewed my dedication to training and the brotherhood we all share. And you know, things always get better.
My second wife is great.....shares my interest in enhanced training, cooks my food just right, is a great mom to our 5 sons, and is much younger and prettier than I deserve.......but if it went down the dumper tomorrow, I'm still going to the gym.
Hang in there, man, it'll be ok.

IM

Great post bro, this is so.. true. I was in a very similiar situation with a girl that I was with for 6yrs. I was certainly no angel but I always treated her with respect I was devoted to her and gave her everything I had. Then she took my heart stepped on it, spit on it, and left me for dead. At the time I was training for my first competition and needles to say for at least a week or two my training, diet and stress levels were out of control. I took all those feelings and emotions to the gym and let loose on the weights> I refocused and was determined to show her that while she can knock me down she can't knock me out. To make a long story short I won the show and haven't looked back since.
Show that bitch she just made the mistake of her life and move on. Attack the weights and get up on some strange bro you definitely deserve it.

 

[courtneybcca]

Once again division…. I read your first few posts on here and I couldn’t read anymore… yes there are lots of bad women but there are also lots of bad men…

You can not generalize all women.. I am in my early 20’s and I KNOW what I want… You have to look at each female separately.. I have been on my own since I was 14. I got married to my high school sweetheart in vegas and was working on getting it annulled days later... And I can admit that I had the grass is greener feeling and left him… I am just about to turn 23 and I know the EXACT man I want.. But in this case, he has left me… I guess karma is always the winner…

Men play the same games… And they also like the bad girls..

It is really sad to say but if you naturally an honest, open, and loving person… No matter if your male or female assholes will take advantage of your feelings and stomp on your heart…

Relationships SUCK… diamondcutcows I am sorry to have jacked your thread but I had to say something…

I really feel your pain because I am going through the same feelings right now.. I know how much you are hurting and it is a horrible thing… But at least you can say that you know what real love is. A lot of people are emotionally retarded and can’t open up their heart enough to allow themselves to feel.

I totally understand that you love this lady and you want the situation to stay the way it is.. But you are forced to face the reality of the situation. And No one can sugar coat it for you DATING SUCKS!!

This is something I learned in my psychology class that might help you see the scientific approach this..

There are the 5 steps of grieving process through a bad situation

1. denial - which you have already gone through that stage
2. anger - I think you have been though this one as well
3. bargining - you are probably between 3-4 trying to figure out this situation
4. depression – the obvious one
5. acceptance -- this is when you will accept the result and move on… which is the hardest phase.. But you are already half way through so you don’t have to much more to go…

Good LUCK…. Just remember that karma always comes around so she will get hers.. And you will some day find someone that is truly deserving of you.

 

[wutangnomo]

Time to start inviting female friends over to your place. Make sure to have raunchy dirty wild sex. Leave used condoms and womens panties scattered throughout.

 

[doublebicep]

I frankly don't care whether you agree with my points or not. I'm here to give him advice from a male's perspective on women and why they do what they do. She cheated and I think it's best he moves on.

Once a woman cheats, in my eyes she's tainted. I'd never get back with a woman who cheated on me. I just can't see her the same way again, either emotionally or physically......once another guy's pounded her, I don't consider her mine anymore.

That's just the way it is.






DIV

Yep, and think about how you could ever trust her again? Also, don't be surprise that once you do start to move on she comes running back to you. Be ready for that. Know up front, will you have her back or not?

 

[quizkid]

Cow,

You need to move on. It will hurt for years. It took me almost 10 years to fully get over how bad my first real love hurt me. I think she kind of enjoyed seeing me hurt.

Unfortunatley, you will probably treat the next couple girls like crap as a weird way of getting even.

It's a tough spot brother. All I can say is stay close with your true friends, train and don't feel sorry for yourself. There are alot of good people out there.

Start looking (not at the bars or gym either).

I found my wife of 7 years at a library.

good luck

chilly

 

[DIVISION]

Time to start inviting female friends over to your place. Make sure to have raunchy dirty wild sex. Leave used condoms and womens panties scattered throughout.

Now that's revenge.....do all this while she's still living there?

Damn, Wu-Wu.......you're an evil lil' bastard.



DIV

 

[DIVISION]

Yep, and think about how you could ever trust her again? Also, don't be surprise that once you do start to move on she comes running back to you. Be ready for that. Know up front, will you have her back or not?

The problem is, I'm not sure if he's strong enough to cut ties and wash his hands of the whole situation. Yes, she'll probably try to crawl back eventually, but I only hope he's strong willed enough to be resolute in his decicion, whatever that may be.

Like I said, once a woman cheats, I wouldn't be able to take her back under any circumstances. CowCutter seems like the type of guy who might take her back, but I hope he understand that he might be setting himself up for a bigger fall later down the line.




DIV

 

[Tweakle]

thats rough man. But it's a major problem with younger girls, especially ones who have slutty partygirl friends to influence them (and pursuade them they're missing out on something important by not spending their weekends dancing & having skinny little coked-up dudes hitting on them).

Sucks but learn from it, deal with the pain and them move on and have some fun. I like the idea of spending a little quality time with the guy she's fucking, it'll help get it out your system and you wont feel like a victim.

 

[maldorf]

I have been married 2x, my first wife was unfaitful to me. She lied to me for awhile about being home late from work, but finally admitted to what she had done when I found his phone number hidden in her car. I think she would have continued to lie to me if i had not found that number The guy turned out to be the brother of one of her best friends, a guy who I thought was a new friend.
We were going to try to work things out. One night she was late comming home again. I went to her friends house and caught her screwing him there in a rv parked in the driveway. Worst of all, she was wearing the nightgown given to her by her sister that she wore on our wedding night.
At first you might want to hurt the guy, I know I did, but I am glad I did nothing. Walking away from it makes you a real man. Doing jail time over beating up a deadbeat isnt worth it either!
Once a cheater, always a cheater. These people cannot be trusted, get out now while it will be fairly easy. I hope you dont have any kids or major assets to divide up, we did not.
I am glad that we divorced and that it is over. About 2 years later she called my father's house trying to find where I was, of course he did not tell her. It turns out she had moved in with the guy but things did not work out for them. She was trying to get me back.
I think the thing I miss the most about our marriage was her family, not her. I miss her mom,dad, and sister. These people were great, I am much better off now without her.
Things were pretty hard the first 5 months or so, but it does get easier. The day the divorce goes through is kinda rough too, it brings back all the pain. Once that has all passed, years of time pass and you almost forget how bad it was. I remarried 4 years later and am still married happily now for 9 years with 2 little girls.

 

[Popeye1]

That really sucks....I've been there. Try everything you can to hold the marriage together. You have to at least give it a shot. If that fails, hey, you're young enough.....get out of that mess and find a real woman. You'll never look back!

 

[CrazyK]

Once again division…. I read your first few posts on here and I couldn’t read anymore… yes there are lots of bad women but there are also lots of bad men…

You can not generalize all women.. I am in my early 20’s and I KNOW what I want… You have to look at each female separately.. I have been on my own since I was 14. I got married to my high school sweetheart in vegas and was working on getting it annulled days later... And I can admit that I had the grass is greener feeling and left him… I am just about to turn 23 and I know the EXACT man I want.. But in this case, he has left me… I guess karma is always the winner…

Men play the same games… And they also like the bad girls..

It is really sad to say but if you naturally an honest, open, and loving person… No matter if your male or female assholes will take advantage of your feelings and stomp on your heart…

Relationships SUCK… diamondcutcows I am sorry to have jacked your thread but I had to say something…

I really feel your pain because I am going through the same feelings right now.. I know how much you are hurting and it is a horrible thing… But at least you can say that you know what real love is. A lot of people are emotionally retarded and can’t open up their heart enough to allow themselves to feel.

I totally understand that you love this lady and you want the situation to stay the way it is.. But you are forced to face the reality of the situation. And No one can sugar coat it for you DATING SUCKS!!

This is something I learned in my psychology class that might help you see the scientific approach this..

There are the 5 steps of grieving process through a bad situation

1. denial - which you have already gone through that stage
2. anger - I think you have been though this one as well
3. bargining - you are probably between 3-4 trying to figure out this situation
4. depression – the obvious one
5. acceptance -- this is when you will accept the result and move on… which is the hardest phase.. But you are already half way through so you don’t have to much more to go…

Good LUCK…. Just remember that karma always comes around so she will get hers.. And you will some day find someone that is truly deserving of you.

Maybe not all, but a much bigger % of white american girls really have relationship issues. I've given up on them, and won't take any more chances. It's like they just have to have something to dramatize in there lives and/or tend to some weird ass drug/alcohol addiction.

 

[wutangnomo]

Now that's revenge.....do all this while she's still living there?

Damn, Wu-Wu.......you're an evil lil' bastard.



DIV

One thing that pisses me off more and more now is the weakness of men. Why do men put themselves through shit??? There are an infinite number of women out there it seems, yet men will want to be with the dirty rat bitch whore who screwed them over. Come on guys, have some dignity and pick up your balls already. We've all been hurt. We've all gone through our share of relationship woos. One thing I will NEVER allow is letting some selfish bitch walk away with my self-respect and dignity.

When a woman walks all over you and you continue to want her, that means shes got you by the balls and has stolen your very manhood. Don't be like that pathetic guy who will still marry the broad that lied about being abducted.

 

[doublebicep]

One thing that pisses me off more and more now is the weakness of men. Why do men put themselves through shit??? There are an infinite number of women out there it seems, yet men will want to be with the dirty rat bitch whore who screwed them over. Come on guys, have some dignity and pick up your balls already. We've all been hurt. We've all gone through our share of relationship woos. One thing I will NEVER allow is letting some selfish bitch walk away with my self-respect and dignity.

When a woman walks all over you and you continue to want her, that means shes got you by the balls and has stolen your very manhood. Don't be like that pathetic guy who will still marry the broad that lied about being abducted.

Well put wutangnomo.

 

[krishna]

Once again division…. I read your first few posts on here and I couldn’t read anymore… yes there are lots of bad women but there are also lots of bad men…

You can not generalize all women.. I am in my early 20’s and I KNOW what I want… You have to look at each female separately.. I have been on my own since I was 14. I got married to my high school sweetheart in vegas and was working on getting it annulled days later... And I can admit that I had the grass is greener feeling and left him… I am just about to turn 23 and I know the EXACT man I want.. But in this case, he has left me… I guess karma is always the winner…

Men play the same games… And they also like the bad girls..

It is really sad to say but if you naturally an honest, open, and loving person… No matter if your male or female assholes will take advantage of your feelings and stomp on your heart…

Relationships SUCK… diamondcutcows I am sorry to have jacked your thread but I had to say something…

I really feel your pain because I am going through the same feelings right now.. I know how much you are hurting and it is a horrible thing… But at least you can say that you know what real love is. A lot of people are emotionally retarded and can’t open up their heart enough to allow themselves to feel.

I totally understand that you love this lady and you want the situation to stay the way it is.. But you are forced to face the reality of the situation. And No one can sugar coat it for you DATING SUCKS!!

This is something I learned in my psychology class that might help you see the scientific approach this..

There are the 5 steps of grieving process through a bad situation

1. denial - which you have already gone through that stage
2. anger - I think you have been though this one as well
3. bargining - you are probably between 3-4 trying to figure out this situation
4. depression – the obvious one
5. acceptance -- this is when you will accept the result and move on… which is the hardest phase.. But you are already half way through so you don’t have to much more to go…

Good LUCK…. Just remember that karma always comes around so she will get hers.. And you will some day find someone that is truly deserving of you.

I bet you thought you THOUGHT you knew what you wanted when you were younger too. Things always change; people change. Marriage is expecially hard these days because it's so easy to get a divorce. You may know what you want now, but that doesn't mean it won't CHANGE in the future. Marriage is a joke these days. Time to be a player partner!

 

[Makavelli]

Sorry to hear that Diamond. You're a solid bro and I hope everything works out for the best. I had to break up with the love of my life last year because she was too immature. Wanted to go out partying etc. And she was 27! The break woke her up real quick. Soon she was begging to be with me again. I ignored her for months, but my feelings came back and now we're together again. I'm happy, she's grown up a lot and happy. So it will work out how it's supossed to. Even though it sucks right now.

 

[marshallmadman]

The best way to get over a woman is to get under another one. Be careful, though. Be careful of how you treat the next one. Little Marshall had a gurl really fuck him over a few years ago, and fucked his head up bad. A few months later Marshall meets the absolute girl of his dreams. Because he was still so fucked up over this other dumb bitch, he shit on the girl of his dreams a lot and lost her. Don't go doin' that. Keep it to strictly non-serious shit until you are sure that you got your head screwed on straight.

 

[krishna]

Once again division…. I read your first few posts on here and I couldn’t read anymore… yes there are lots of bad women but there are also lots of bad men…

You can not generalize all women.. I am in my early 20’s and I KNOW what I want… You have to look at each female separately.. I have been on my own since I was 14. I got married to my high school sweetheart in vegas and was working on getting it annulled days later... And I can admit that I had the grass is greener feeling and left him… I am just about to turn 23 and I know the EXACT man I want.. But in this case, he has left me… I guess karma is always the winner…

Men play the same games… And they also like the bad girls..

It is really sad to say but if you naturally an honest, open, and loving person… No matter if your male or female assholes will take advantage of your feelings and stomp on your heart…

Relationships SUCK… diamondcutcows I am sorry to have jacked your thread but I had to say something…

I really feel your pain because I am going through the same feelings right now.. I know how much you are hurting and it is a horrible thing… But at least you can say that you know what real love is. A lot of people are emotionally retarded and can’t open up their heart enough to allow themselves to feel.

I totally understand that you love this lady and you want the situation to stay the way it is.. But you are forced to face the reality of the situation. And No one can sugar coat it for you DATING SUCKS!!

This is something I learned in my psychology class that might help you see the scientific approach this..

There are the 5 steps of grieving process through a bad situation

1. denial - which you have already gone through that stage
2. anger - I think you have been though this one as well
3. bargining - you are probably between 3-4 trying to figure out this situation
4. depression – the obvious one
5. acceptance -- this is when you will accept the result and move on… which is the hardest phase.. But you are already half way through so you don’t have to much more to go…

Good LUCK…. Just remember that karma always comes around so she will get hers.. And you will some day find someone that is truly deserving of you.

I wasn't trying to flame you by the way. Your post was pretty good. Never hurts to mention the stages of loss and grieving. I'm actually on my last year of undergrad for my psychology and philosophy degrees.

 

[BOOEY]

Once a cheater, always a cheater. These people cannot be trusted

So true

 

[MUSTANG_18]

I don't think there is anything left to say that has not already been said. I am very sorry to hear this whole situation bud, you seem like a good guy with a solid head on your shoulders. I know it's hard now but time heals all wounds and the sun will always shine another day. Surround yourself with good friends, family and just try to go out and live life to the fullest.
BTW...Once a cheater, always a cheater! Keep that in mind when she comes crawling back (she will) I have found the saying "you don't know what you got until it's gone" to be very true on more then one occasion.

M18

 

[courtneybcca]

I wasn't trying to flame you by the way. Your post was pretty good. Never hurts to mention the stages of loss and grieving. I'm actually on my last year of undergrad for my psychology and philosophy degrees.

I didn't think you were flaming me at all...


At the time I knew the relationship was doomed because I felt like I was settling on him.. because I didn't want to be alone, and because I love him... people dont judge people if you have no idea of there history...

that boy is still in my life and I consider him family.. I was confused at the time about WHAT kind of Love I have for him... He will always be in my life and we will always be close but we should not be together...

and I do know what I want now... I have dated A LOT and found out exactly what I DONT WANT.. weeded my way down through the men and different personalities that way first.. so much so that I thought the man of my dreams didn't exist or COULDN't exist... I have now found one VERY CLOSE to my ideal with one exception... but I know no one is perfect.. so we will see.. But at least if it doesn't work out I know that men like this exist so it is not all for a loss... And I know that I still have the ability to love even though I have been hurt so many times...