Need advice...found another womans phone number in my hubbys jeans

[Citruscide]

Please ONLY serious replys if you dont mind......

As I was folding my husband jeans a piece of paper fell out the pocket...when I opened it, I found a womans name w/her number and her work number on it (also an email address - but I can hardly make it out)

I researched as much as I could on the pc and found out that SHE is the exact same age as me - she lives 2 hours away in a city that my husband frequently travels for work.....

I asked him very nicely about the number and he said he had NO IDEA where the number came from...he said he must have picked it up on accident at a store or job or something...I acted like I believed him and told him that I trusted him - and I threw the number in the garbage....only to go and dig it out when he went outside.....

Now I dont know where to go from here....I dont want to call b/c IF there is something going on, then she would probly just lie....I would feel like an insecure stupid little wife calling....I would love to drive and just SEE if this is someone my husband would be interested in (see if shes pretty)....I dont know what to do He doesnt know Im even looking into this anymore....I can check his cell bill - but it wont be here for another 3 or 4 weeks and I would go crazy till then....HELP!!!!

Honestly - I have questioned his fidelity a time or two, but lately he has given me NO reason and Ive actually trusted him more than ever, but you never know???

If he has a number in his pocket, either she gave it to him, or he asked for it... I haven't gotten a number since I have been with my girl... I have no desire to be with anyone else. I did (before we cleaned my room) have a TON of numbers laying all over the floor... I think she believed I had recently gotten them... but what she didn't realize at the time is that I was a pack-rat and had about 100 numbers laying around from the time I worked in the club... I think she realizes that now.

Trust is a hard thing to get, and almost impossible to regain... you'll have to look deep at this yourself and ask yourself what YOU really believe... forget what everyone else is saying, forget what he is saying... LOOK INSIDE YOU... there is where you'll find the answer... I know it sounds sappy, but in the end, you can only trust yourself... no one else.

C

 

[runner]

you say he's a flirt....he's obviously lying about the number, but what if he IS just flirting with her and not going any further. how would you feel about that and what would you do?

 

[polarpixie]

Polar - I was actually shocked when I found the number.....I mean there was a time in the past my first thought would have been "he's fucking her" but not now...things seem to me as if they couldnt be any better.....there is only one thing - he is the biggest flirt or whatever, he loves the attention

Oh...Married to the Flirt. I've heard of those before. Hehe. Well, luvs, I'd suggest you just talk to your hubby. If he really was hanging to that number only for kicks, then ever found out that you went behind his back investigating things, that's gonna cause some real trouble. If he was tempted by the idea of cheating with this girl, you need to talk to him, find out what's going thru his head, and squelch those thoughts before they turn into real action. But you've gotta do this calmly and in a non-accusing tone, just act real hurt (u prolly don't even have to act) that he didn't throw that number right out.

 

[fistfullofsteel]

polar, i just wanted to say that i don't read your respones. i just like to stare at your av. i wanted to ask you if you ever done 3rd entry or thought about it?

 

[CdnChick26]

Luvs, sorry to hear about your situation...I don't post here much, but I couldn't help myself this time.

Your husband's lame excuse that he didn't know where the number came from reminds EXACTLY of something my ex boyfriend would have said. He was a cheater. He was outgoing, a flirt, and very sneaky (or so he though) Not only was I with a cheater, I am also a private investigator.

You seem worried about calling this woman in case she denies everything or tries to protect your husband. From my experience as a p.i., a large number of these women don't even know the guy they are sleeping with is married. When they find out, they are just as pissed as the wife and by no means want to protect him. They totally side with the wife and want revenge.

I don't think you should bother making a special trip to see what this woman looks like. Even you see her and think she's not your husband's type, you could be wrong. When men get all riled up and horny a lot of times they'll just hook up with whoever. I think you should definitely call first...using the ideas that were mentioned earlier.

Anyway, good luck with everything. I know how difficult this can be...

 

[polarpixie]

polar, i just wanted to say that i don't read your respones. i just like to stare at your av. i wanted to ask you if you ever done 3rd entry or thought about it?

ffs.....NO!!!! However, I did offer to change my avatar if it is that much of a distraction to you. and start reading my responses, I usually make really good points.

 

[fistfullofsteel]

absolutely not, if anything, we want more sexiness from you

more sexiness.

 

[alexiarenee]

He's definitley lying to you.
He may be lying to her, too.....She may not know he is married, so if you were to call her and say you were his wife she might be surprised and be honest with you. She'd be upset with him, too.
I have been in this situation, however on the other end.
I got a phone call from a g/f...we ended up talking for an hour or two and since then I have never spoken to her b/f.....
He had been lying to the both of us.
Luckily, I had only invested 2 weeks into that.

 

[alexiarenee]

Luvs, sorry to hear about your situation...I don't post here much, but I couldn't help myself this time.

Your husband's lame excuse that he didn't know where the number came from reminds EXACTLY of something my ex boyfriend would have said. He was a cheater. He was outgoing, a flirt, and very sneaky (or so he though) Not only was I with a cheater, I am also a private investigator.

You seem worried about calling this woman in case she denies everything or tries to protect your husband. From my experience as a p.i., a large number of these women don't even know the guy they are sleeping with is married. When they find out, they are just as pissed as the wife and by no means want to protect him. They totally side with the wife and want revenge.

I don't think you should bother making a special trip to see what this woman looks like. Even you see her and think she's not your husband's type, you could be wrong. When men get all riled up and horny a lot of times they'll just hook up with whoever. I think you should definitely call first...using the ideas that were mentioned earlier.

Anyway, good luck with everything. I know how difficult this can be...

Very true.
You never really know who he will cheat with.....
My b/f cheated on me with someone he didnt even find very attractive..his excuse? "She was nice and appreciated me"
WTF?

 

[luvs2workout]

I CALLED HER - SHE ADMITTED IT - THEY HAVE BEEN TALKING FOR A FEW MONTHS - SHE SAID NO SEX!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I AM GOING INSANE TO SAY THE VERY LEAST