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My brother died today.

hardrock

hardrock

Go fuck your own face!
Platinum
This is the hardest thing I've ever had to write.

My mom found him face down in his room at 4 pm today.

She checked on him at 9 am and again at noon and he was sound asleep snoring. He had been saying how he couldn't sleep well lately so she let him sleep. Came home at 4 only to find him dead.

He had a drinking problem and had been taking Flexeril for a bad back. The police also found 2 empty bottles or Tylenol in his room that were recently purchased. There was a hard white substance he had puked up on the floor that I cleaned up. I figure it was the Tylenol.

It was either an accidental overdose or suicide. I can't believe he's gone. It's like a bad dream and I'm gonna wake up and it will all be ok. But it's not.

I was with him on New years and he was in the best of spirits. He was never sad. He was also very private so if there was something he probably wouldn't have said anything anyway.

he left behind 2 wonderful kids, my mom, my sis, and myself. I don't know how to deal with this. You'd think I'd be used to it by now having 4 friends die this year along with my grandma. Poor dude. I hope he wasn't in pain or scared.

You will be missed my brother. I love you!


I have his favorite hat on and his lat tin of chew in my back pocket.


R.I.P. Victor Alan Ross
 
That is extremely rough, I have had lot's of good friends pass but never close family.

My condolences to you and your family, I'm truely sorry even though we don't know each other.

Wes
 
omg.....im so sorry to hear that hardrock. fight through it man. im very sorry for u. fuck i hate life sometimes seriously
 
hardrock said:
This is the hardest thing I've ever had to write.
R.I.P. Victor Alan Ross
Click to expand...
Jesus Man! I'm so sorry to hear that. I can't imagine what you are going through. My prayers are with you & your family.
Hang in there.
 
He had a rough life. His dad basically disowned him at 15 in which my mom let him live with us. He's not really my brother but has been part of the family for 16 years. His mom died when he was 10 and he has had problems ever since.

He was going to get laid off at the end of the month due to his employer finding out he had a felony on his record he had lied about. He was also possibly facing prision again for not fulfilling his probation agreement.

In spite of all this I can't believe he would leave his kids behind. Especially with their wacko mom. He got divorced 2 years ago and moved back in with my mom. He had a good job and knew he could get another.

My mom is a wreck thinking she could have done something or should have got home earlier. I too blame myself for not just popping in and waking him up by calling him fatboy just to fuck with him.

I miss him so much already I can't stand it.

The worst part is that his biological father who doesen't speak to him will get the body and decide what to do with it. he'll probably have him cremated just cause he's too cheap to have a funeral. Fuckin asshole. My family wants to take care of everything, but being the asshole he is probably wont have it.
 
perkele said:
Sorry to hear.

Remember that you have a lot of friends here if you ever need to talk.
Click to expand...


I know bro. As sad as it sound I cam right to my pc to write about it here when I got home.

I had to stop at the gas station on the way home and couldn't even stop crying for that.

I hate this! Why did he have to die. Only 31 too.
 
My condolences bro.
 
:wilted: :wilted: :wilted: My sympathies to you and your family. I can't imagine such an experience and am truly sorry for your loss :wilted: :wilted: :wilted:
 
Sorry to hear that man.
Be strong throughout this thing, the people he has left will need the support.
2 empty bottles of tylenol and alcohol?...it might not have been an accident
 
My condolences & prayers for your family. It sounds like you all were his rock of stability through all of his challenges in life.
 
My condolences to you and your family

I'm truely sorry
 
I wouldn't know how to handle that many losses in a year, especially family.
You'll make it through though, so will the family. You'll come out tougher because of this. Hopefully this upcoming year brings you more joy than last year. Good luck bro.
 
You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I hope this is not too long or inappropriate in any way, but it speaks of remembrance and the wonderful memories of those we keep close to our hearts. Peace be with you.

At the rising of the sun and at its going down,
We remember them.

At the blowing of the wind and in the chill of Winter, We remember them.

At the opening of buds and in the rebirth of Spring,
We remember them.

At the blueness of the skies and in the warmth of Summer,
We remember them.

At the rustling of leaves and the beauty of Autumn,
We remember them.

At the beginning of the year and when it ends,
We remember them.

As long as we live, they too will live;
for they are now a part of us, as we remember them.

When we are weary and in need of strength,
We remember them.

When we are lost and sick at heart,
We remember them.

When we have joys we yearn to share,
We remember them.

When we have decisions that are difficult to make,
We remember them

When we have achievements that are based on theirs,
We remember them.

As long as we live, they too shall live,
for they are a part of us, as we remember them.
 
I'm very sorry to hear that my good brother.
 
Oh, man. Words just don't work sometimes.

Think about his good qualities. Sounds like that won't be hard to do.

Doesn't matter what I think, but for what it's worth it doesn't sound like he bailed out on you or his kids. It does sound like an accident. That still sucks, but now it's time to think of those kids... they're going to need you to be there. That doesn't mean you have to "be a man" and bottle it all up inside -- it's okay to let them know you miss their dad too.

It'll help them to know that.
 
Very sorry hardrock.

I lost my brother about 6 years ago. I still miss him, but it does get better.

Hang in there.
 
My deepest and most sincere condolences to you and your family. I can't imagine dealing with this, my brother is one of my very best friends. I wish you every possible comfort in dealing with this tragedy.

Scotsman
 
I'm so sorry to hear this man, I didn't know him, and don't know you that well, but reading this really bummed me out... I am sure you were a great bro to him and he knew he was loved.
 
Damn....so sorry bro. I can't imagine losing my little brother. Stay strong my man, you and your family are in my prayers.
 
So sorry to hear that bro. Things happen that are just out of your control Just enjoy every minute that comes.
 
Thank you everyone. His biological brother just left and he doesent even seem as shook as I am. He didn't have a whole lot of contact with him tho.

I spoke with his father tonight. Him and my family are gonna do the whole funeral thing together. That makes me happy. We are going to look at funeral homes tomorrow. All of us.

Thanks again everyone! K to all as soon as I have time or emotions to worry about that shit.

I love you guys! You are like my best friends I've never met!
 
My condolenses to you and your family. It's been over 6 months since I lost my brother and I still am not dealing with it very well. Expect a hard road, but remember your family. You all will need each other.
 
i was just going to say that I thought eldandy went though this awhile ago and he might be someone you can really talk to about your pain......I'm so sorry to hear about your loss...sounds like it was an accident but I know that dosen't make it any easier to deal with.....please take care of yourself and know that we are all here for you to talk to and to vent......My prayers are with you and your family Hard rock!
 
i'm so saddened of your brothers death my friend. If I had the power to bring him back to you I would. Give my prayers to you and your family during this troubled time.
 
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your Family during these trying times. Four years ago I lost my Mom.The poem below was the one thing that helped me understand,I hope it helps You and your Family as well.

xxxxxxxxx,Shannon

To my dearest family, some things I'd like to say...

but first of all, to let you know, that I arrived okay.

I'm writing this from heaven. Here I dwell with God above.

Here, there's no more tears of sadness; here is just eternal love.



Please do not be unhappy just because I'm out of sight.

Remember that I'm with you every morning, noon and night.

That day I had to leave you when my life on earth was through,

God picked me up and hugged me and He said, "I welcome you."



It's good to have you back again; you were missed while you were gone.

As for your dearest family, they'll be here later on.

I need you here badly; you're part of my plan.

There's so much that we have to do, to help our mortal man."



God gave me a list of things, that he wished for me to do.

And foremost on the list, was to watch and care for you.

And when you lie in bed at night, the day's chores put to flight.

God and I are closest to you....in the middle of the night.



When you think of my life on earth, and all those loving years

because you are only human, they are bound to bring you tears.

But do not be afraid to cry; it does relieve the pain.

Remember there would be no flowers, unless there was some rain.



I wish that I could tell you all that God has planned.

But if I were to tell you, you wouldn't understand.

But one thing is for certain, though my life on earth is o'er.

I'm closer to you now, than I ever was before.



There are many rocky roads ahead of you and many hills to climb;

but together we can do it by taking one day at a time.

It was always my philosophy and I'd like it for you too...

that as you give unto the world, the world will give to you.



If you can help somebody who's in sorrow and pain,

then you can say to God at night......"My day was not in vain."

And now I am contented....that my life has been worthwhile,

knowing as I passed along the way, I made somebody smile.



So if you meet somebody who is sad and feeling low,

just lend a hand to pick him up, as on your way you go.

When you're walking down the street, and you've got me on your mind;

I'm walking in your footsteps only half a step behind.



And when it's time for you to go.... from that body to be free,

remember you're not going.....you're coming here to me.
 
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Psalm 23:4

Your brother and family are in my prayers.
 
Chills went up my spine reading your post, condolences my friend. Keep strong, time to look after the kids he left behind and comfort them.

Sorry for the loss.
 
hardrock said:
My family wants to take care of everything, but being the asshole he is probably wont have it.
Click to expand...

Call the guy and insist he let you do the right thing.

Hope things work out for you and your mom.
 
:rose:

sorry to hear that man. i cant think what you must be going threw, just keep strong and feel free to talk about it on E/F, im here most of the time if you need someone to listen bro. chin up man. thinking about u and your family
 
Sorry orb....i also lost a brother ,he was only 24 years old.
It was the hardest thing in my life that i've ever had to deal with and i can only say the pain eases with time.Its been about six years now and i still think about him every day.Stay strong maing.
 
hardrock said:
Thank you everyone. His biological brother just left and he doesent even seem as shook as I am. He didn't have a whole lot of contact with him tho.

I spoke with his father tonight. Him and my family are gonna do the whole funeral thing together. That makes me happy. We are going to look at funeral homes tomorrow. All of us.

Thanks again everyone! K to all as soon as I have time or emotions to worry about that shit.

I love you guys! You are like my best friends I've never met!
Click to expand...

Think not of it, sweet one, so;---
Give it not a tear;
Sigh thou mayst, and bid it go
Any---anywhere.

Do not lool so sad, sweet one,---
Sad and fadingly;
Shed one drop then,---it is gone---
O 'twas born to die!

Still so pale? then, dearest, weep;
Weep, I'll count the tears,
And each one shall be a bliss
For thee in after years.

Brighter has it left thine eyes
Than a sunny rill;
And thy whispering melodies
Are tenderer still.

Yet---as all things mourn awhile
At fleeting blisses,
E'en let us too! but be our dirge
A dirge of kisses.
 
My family is meeting with his father in an hour to set up funeral arrangements. His brother told me that when his dad found out his knees buckled. I actually spoke with him last night for the first time in 15 years.
 
hardrock said:
This is the hardest thing I've ever had to write.

My mom found him face down in his room at 4 pm today.

She checked on him at 9 am and again at noon and he was sound asleep snoring. He had been saying how he couldn't sleep well lately so she let him sleep. Came home at 4 only to find him dead.

He had a drinking problem and had been taking Flexeril for a bad back. The police also found 2 empty bottles or Tylenol in his room that were recently purchased. There was a hard white substance he had puked up on the floor that I cleaned up. I figure it was the Tylenol.

It was either an accidental overdose or suicide. I can't believe he's gone. It's like a bad dream and I'm gonna wake up and it will all be ok. But it's not.

I was with him on New years and he was in the best of spirits. He was never sad. He was also very private so if there was something he probably wouldn't have said anything anyway.

he left behind 2 wonderful kids, my mom, my sis, and myself. I don't know how to deal with this. You'd think I'd be used to it by now having 4 friends die this year along with my grandma. Poor dude. I hope he wasn't in pain or scared.

You will be missed my brother. I love you!


I have his favorite hat on and his lat tin of chew in my back pocket.


R.I.P. Victor Alan Ross
Click to expand...

Very sorry to hear about this. Hang in there. Chesty
 
Really sorry for your loss bor. This is a true tragedy.

My condolences. I don't know what I would do if I lost a sibling.
 
man, really sorry to hear about your loss. My prayers go out to you and your family during your time of need. God bless you and help you through the greiving process..
 
Just got back from the funeral arrangements. His dad tried to go the cheap route. We weren't having that shit!

I am soo fuggin exhausted I can barely walk. I can't believe how drained I am.

Gonna meet up with a friend who's brother was murdered a few years back later on. he's a good friend and is very supportive.
 
I am sorry for your terrible loss. I lost both my brother and sister to terminal illnesses when I was younger. At least I KNEW they were probably going to die. There are never any words to express enough sympathy and empathy for your tragedy. My husband is 31 - I couldn't imagine suddenly losing him.
 
Damn I am Truly Sorry and can only say I wish you and your family the best as I know there is nothing to say that can take the pain away,,,Just stay strong over there
 
it will get better over time
sounds like your bro lived a life of pain
the pain is gone
 
hardrock said:
This is the hardest thing I've ever had to write.

My mom found him face down in his room at 4 pm today.

She checked on him at 9 am and again at noon and he was sound asleep snoring. He had been saying how he couldn't sleep well lately so she let him sleep. Came home at 4 only to find him dead.

He had a drinking problem and had been taking Flexeril for a bad back. The police also found 2 empty bottles or Tylenol in his room that were recently purchased. There was a hard white substance he had puked up on the floor that I cleaned up. I figure it was the Tylenol.

It was either an accidental overdose or suicide. I can't believe he's gone. It's like a bad dream and I'm gonna wake up and it will all be ok. But it's not.

I was with him on New years and he was in the best of spirits. He was never sad. He was also very private so if there was something he probably wouldn't have said anything anyway.

he left behind 2 wonderful kids, my mom, my sis, and myself. I don't know how to deal with this. You'd think I'd be used to it by now having 4 friends die this year along with my grandma. Poor dude. I hope he wasn't in pain or scared.

You will be missed my brother. I love you!


I have his favorite hat on and his lat tin of chew in my back pocket.


R.I.P. Victor Alan Ross
Click to expand...

I don't even know what to say. I pictured it being my brother dealing with my death or the other way around and man it doesn't feel good at all. I wish I could hang out with you and hear all about your brother man. I'm sorry.
 
damn, i'm so sorry to hear. I myself don't have a brother, but I can imagine how hard it is. Do keep your head held high, i'm shure that he'd want you to.

Whiskey
 
Just came back from the viewing. he looked so much at peace. It was extremely emotional. I held his hand for a while and gave him a kiss on the forehead and told him goodbye and that I love him.

It turns out that he did take roughly 500 Tylenol maybe PMs too. Didn't see the bottles. What my mom heard as snoring was actually what they call a death moan or something along those lines. He was dead before she even got up.
 
hardrock said:
Just came back from the viewing. he looked so much at peace. It was extremely emotional. I held his hand for a while and gave him a kiss on the forehead and told him goodbye and that I love him.

It turns out that he did take roughly 500 Tylenol maybe PMs too. Didn't see the bottles. What my mom heard as snoring was actually what they call a death moan or something along those lines. He was dead before she even got up.
Click to expand...

my thoughts and prayers are with you & your family HR.
 
hardrock said:
Just came back from the viewing. he looked so much at peace. It was extremely emotional. I held his hand for a while and gave him a kiss on the forehead and told him goodbye and that I love him.

It turns out that he did take roughly 500 Tylenol maybe PMs too. Didn't see the bottles. What my mom heard as snoring was actually what they call a death moan or something along those lines. He was dead before she even got up.
Click to expand...
500??
 
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