Might have a 9 yr old daughter that I want to find

[SDRaver]

thanks PC

I just talked to Celene's mom for over an hour. That women has 3 girls and one of them is in the hospital because she is very sick. I don't want to cause any additional stress.
I told her that I trust her descisions and support her on them and she was happy with that. For the first time in her life Celene is finally stable and it needs to stay that way. the mother and I will keep in touch and will have everything about me there for Celene should she ask again.
After all these years the night before i talked to the mom she wrote in her journal that she finally gave up on me coming around. then one day later i make contact. Go figure
She's the mom and has been with Celene since the begining. So if anyone knows what's best for Celene it has to be her mom. Bottom line is she is well take care of and is loved and that's what matters. I finally have a name and a picture which is more than I ever had. I can rest a little easier now.

 

[PHATchik]

You're a hell of a guy. Don't let anyone ever tell you you're not.

 

[SDRaver]

Thanks PC again and again

Always there for me swettie Celene's mom said that if I was part responsible for her 36 hrs of labor and 43 stitches (ouch!) the least I could do was listen to what she has to say LOL. I agree.
finding out who my daughter is has opened a lot of doors for me within the last week. For the first time ever I forgave my mom for all the physical and mental abuse my stepfather gave me. And sometime soon I plan to talk to my father for the 1st time ever. This will alow me to also meet 2 sisters from my father's side that I've never met either.
This little girl who I've yet to meet has had nothing but a positive impact on my life and I'm sure it will continue to be that way. It's definitley a new type of motivation to be busting my ass to be sucessful in whatever it is I do.
Also if after 9 years Celene's mom can be a friend to me after all that time then I know I should be more understinding of people when they do something I don't exactly agree with or understand. She's a hell of a woman and won't even be 28 until the summer.

 

[PHATchik]

Good for you hun! That's awesome to hear. I hope it all goes well for you. I am sure that it will. That little girl is lucky to have a guy like you as her father no matter how long it takes you to meet her.

 

[SDRaver]

can't do much now, an update

well the last time I heard from Kaz, the mom she said she would send me a photo album of my daugthter for Fathers' day. Never heard from her since.
I waited a few weeks to call her back. When I did the phone number was disconnected. The new number is unlisted. All I know is that they live in Jacksonville.
I can't talk to Kaz's parent about it. Last I knew Kaz and her mom where not on speaking terms because of religious differences.
If they want to wait til she's 18 to tell Celine then I can't change that. I believe that Celine is my daughter but no DNA test has been done. I will be getting one before I head over to the Middle East in the near future. 100% proof is better for what than always a shadow of doubt.
I just didn't think it was right for Kaz to tell my mom so much aoubt Celine and say how she would send her all these pics, then nothing.
The stangest thing was Kaz and I were getting along so well and t talking all the time. It didin't matter if it was day or night. If she wanted to talk to me for 2 hours about Celine, I stopped everything I was doing.
Now I'm not saying that I expect anything to happen to me if another Gulf war kicks off. But if something did I'm sure that little girl would never hear about me.
Just don't understand how one minute I'm being thanked for living a succesful life. Or how nice it would be for me to be able to hang out with Celine at the beach all day. Then nothing.
I'm sure there's plenty of people of have an opinion on this. I've been told everything from "your nothing but a damn sperm donor" to "try not to miss out on any more". nothing would suprised me at this point so all replys or welcome.
I will say this. I know that the mom has every right to determine what Celine should or shouldn't know. I just feel that it's possible to play some role in her life eventually. I've offered everything from DNA tests to back child support, to even being stationed in that area to be closer.
Any thoughs from anybody?

 

[TxArmyGuy]

I personally would pursue this at all costs

Faimly is Faimly. You weren't given the chance to be there from day one, now you finally are trying to make things happen and someone is screwing you around again.

Get the paternity test
Pay Back Child support

For heavens sake talk to a lawyer. If I were you I would have gone out of my way to go see her by now. Tough shit if the stepdad dont like it...Thats your kid you have rights

 

[Lakerman]

Sorry to hear that. Good luck and keep us posted!

 

[CYBERNIGG]

I understand what your feeling. I have a 4 year old daughter out there. But, going the way I was in the past I felt that she would be better off without me. Now I wish I never would have done that. I got married and my wife is going to do everything she can to help me. I would like to talk to her at least once. Best of luck to you.

 

[SDRaver]

We'll see

It's not like I expect Celine to run up, give me a hug, call me daddy like nothing ever happened. She does have a father that cares about her enough to adopt her as his own.
If it came to actually seeing her face to face, I'd only hope that love me or hate me she would see for herself that I came looking for her. Hope that made sense. Any comments from the women of EF?

 

[SDRaver]

next step

i have an appt. with legal in less than an hour. will post what I was told as a result of the consultation.