Fiancee expects me to pay for her gas. Yes/no?

[rnch]

I wouldn't doubt it...

With all due respect, may I ask the thread starter why it is that he decided to marry this woman in the first place?

his only "serious" gf so far? i suspect he doesn't know the difference..(no offense, dude)

 

[bodybyjake]

I wouldn't doubt it...

With all due respect, may I ask the thread starter why it is that he decided to marry this woman in the first place?

we arent married yet.

 

[bodybyjake]

his only "serious" gf so far? i suspect he doesn't know the difference..(no offense, dude)

3rd serious one actually. 1st serious gf i had, was 8.5 yrs and bought a house with...

 

[Bikini Mod]

we arent married yet.

I realize that LOL what I was asking is why you decided to ask this particular woman to marry you?

 

[rnch]

we arent married yet.

keep it that way for the near future! ya'll should move in together and you should watch her habits and spending carefully....she is screaming "bad news" to me.

 

[Basikstylz]

I'm also going to go out on a limb here and recommend living together first before you get married too. I'm 31, married almost 3 years, been with her for 7 years. We lived together for 3 years before getting married. I wanted to make sure we were going to work as a couple before getting married. My parents have been married for almost 40 years and with todays current divorce rate I think thats amazing.

If you live together first you get to see how you will work as a couple but still have some sense of independence. You have to share bills and living expenses, groceries, food, cooking dinners, habits and routine, etc. If things didn't work after a year of living together you don't have to go through a divorce, you just go your separate ways. Almost all my girlfriends since college I chose to live with, I went through three of them before finding my wife and I am glad I loved with them all first.

The other thing is communication, you both need to communicate what your expectations are in the relationship for it to be healthy.

Before I decided to get married I read a book called "Smart Couples Finish Rich". Its not just about money its about having a rich relationship with your partner, but money is definitely a topic. Good book, I highly recommend it.

Good luck to you bro, definitely need to communicate more with her.

Funny thing is statisticly couples who co-habitate before marriage actually have a higher divorce rate than couples who don't. I don't know the stats off hand, but we just went over this in one of my classes recently.

I on the other hand agree with you. I think co-habitation before marriage is a good idea as long as you are man enough to accept and admit(to yourself) the truth that comes with it. If you try it and its not what you wanted/expected and it wont ever be you need to accept it and move on instead of becoming another statistic.

 

[Bikini Mod]

3rd serious one actually. 1st serious gf i had, was 8.5 yrs and bought a house with...

You bought a house with a woman that you were not legally married to?

That's interesting. You would trust her enough to combine real estate, entering into a legal contract for homeownership and not just rent an apartment but you didn't trust her enough to make her your wife...

but this woman is somehow worthy of that honor?

It doesn't make sense.

Remember, I am not taking cheap shots. I am just trying to help you gain clarity for yourself. I am afterall married to another man. LOL

 

[Bikini Mod]

Funny thing is statisticly couples who co-habitate before marriage actually have a higher divorce rate than couples who don't. I don't know the stats off hand, but we just went over this in one of my classes recently.

I on the other hand agree with you. I think co-habitation before marriage is a good idea as long as you are man enough to accept and admit(to yourself) the truth that comes with it. If you try it and its not what you wanted/expected and it wont ever be you need to accept it and move on instead of becoming another statistic.

I've been married twice (still married the 2nd go round LOL) And I did it one way - lived with my ex for nearly 2 years before we married, had an eleven year nightmare. Second time round we married on our third date. Yea, we are nuts, what can we say...

The second time round we knew a lot more about life and what it was that we wanted from it and from one another so when we clicked the choice was simple. He asked me and I said yes and then we got married.

It just seems that the Jake may have too big a heart (and too hard a pecker) and chooses women that don't value what he has to offer. This shit won't fly forever though as eventually men tend to get fed up when that sweet young thang they married *magically* tunns into a harpy who shrieks ever louder, "MORE MORE MORE!!! I WANT MORE GIVE IT TO ME NOW!!!" as she keeps stepping on the back of his neck.

... just sayin is all.

 

[bodybyjake]

You bought a house with a woman that you were not legally married to?

That's interesting. You would trust her enough to combine real estate, entering into a legal contract for homeownership and not just rent an apartment but you didn't trust her enough to make her your wife...

but this woman is somehow worthy of that honor?

It doesn't make sense.

Remember, I am not taking cheap shots. I am just trying to help you gain clarity for yourself. I am afterall married to another man. LOL

Well that relationship was great on paper - she had a great job, was way into fitness (woke up at 4am, made breakfast, packed lunches for both of us, etc) but she got mean and controlling 2 yrs after we moved in together.
It was going in the direction of marriage although both of us at that time
thought marriage was just a piece of paper..

this woman now was the sweetest for the longest time and still really is. just some of her attitudes towards things do not coincide with mine. we talked about things like that and agreed that we wouldnt see things the same way every time and just have to work through disagreements..

 

[canadianhitman]

This shit won't fly forever though as eventually men tend to get fed up when that sweet young thang they married *magically* tunns into a harpy who shrieks ever louder, "MORE MORE MORE!!! I WANT MORE GIVE IT TO ME NOW!!!" as she keeps stepping on the back of his neck.

... just sayin is all.

I wish I could hit you with green again...you're so on the money today.