Please Scroll Down to See Forums Below
napsgear
genezapharmateuticals
domestic-supply US-PHARMACIES UGL OZ
Raptor Labs UGFREAK OxygenPharm
napsgeargenezapharmateuticals domestic-supplyUS-PHARMACIES UGL OZUGFREAKRaptor LabsOxygenPharm

Check this out

chesty

chesty

Bodybuilding Competitor
Head Moderator
My best friend is also getting married and he wanted to check on his fiancee cause she started acting weird the last few days. She is pregnant and it is his baby, no questions there, but she has become very quiet almost to the point of ingnoring him. They used to talk on the phone all the time, and on ym when they were separated.

They had an engagement party Wed night and apparently all was cool thursday night when she went home. Friday, she had to go to the hospital, but he didn't know that. He was supposed to meet her at the airport for breakfast before she flew out to her home state to sign papers to sell her home.

So anyway, after he tried for 4 hours to get ahold of her, she calls and says she had to go to the emergency room for a nose bleed that would not stop and that she loves him and to call her when he gets the message. So he does, and they set up a lunch date. He cruises on over and receives another message that she has to go back for two more tests and to call her and that she wants to see him before he has to go and that she loves him.

Well, he tries for another five hours to get a hold of her and can't. He calls all of the hospitals in the area and none of them have had a patient with her name check in.

Then at about 1030 that night he gets a couple of txts and that is it. Then from that point forward, she hasn't replied to one of his txt, when they are on ym, she will just log out claiming it is the wireless. But when they would talk before on it, if she got logged out she would log back in or txt him what happened. She doesn't answer a single phone call or return his calls.

She has something to tell him about her, but wants to wait until she is ready and to trust her. So he does and says he will. But now he feels like he is being ignored and so forth. She says she is still marrying him and they are supposed to meet her parents and family in a couple of weeks.

So, he asks me to check her out and see if anything is up with her (con artist, what not) So, I do, he gives me the state she moved from and so I do a public records search for court cases in the superior court.

I find out that yes, she was married to the one guy she says is her ex and they got divorced 1 1/2 years ago.

But then, I find that she is still married to another guy, but has filed the papers in the same state she is from. I recognize the name she hyphenated to hers, because he was telling me how her emails had that name on them and she told him it was an old family joke.

I also find that she had filed a restraining order against the current guy for physical abuse just a few months prior to filing for the divorce which is still pending.

Now, my question is this, I believe she loves my friend and I know he loves her. Should I tell him this info or let her tell him. I know he doesn't like being lied to and it isn't like he just asked her to marry him, they are going to have a kid as well, so he can't just tell her to piss off for not being upfront with him.

I can understand her not wanting to say anything and hoping that it would have all been done soon and then she could have just stated she was married twice and not once. But why she just didn't say that to him at the beginning is bothersome and the fact that she lied about the email name when it was really her married name from the second marriage is where I have a problem. He doesn't like being lied to any more than I do.

I can understand getting divorced because of physical abuse and in the process meeting someone you do want to spend your life with and don't consider that cheating, but what I can't understand is why lie? If he is the one for you he will understand the process you are going through.

Now that she is pregnant she is in a real hurt locker, because he doesn't believe in birth's out of wedlock and wants to marry her before she starts showing. They have told everyone except her parents and their kids.

She had agreed to moving in in like 3 weeks (first weekend in June) and then getting married as soon afterwards as possible. If he pushes it who knows what she will do. But she needs to come clean with him and soon.

I don't know whether or not I should tell him or confront her without him knowing. I honestly believe that she does love him and wants to be with him for the rest of their lives, but things moved much quicker on the good side than she anticipated and is possibly freaking out.

What an f'd up sunday this became.
 
159755.jpg
 
Can you confront her and tell he you know her secrets? This way you give her a choice to tell him, or you tell him yourself. Either way, your friend should know this before the wedding...
 
Weeellllllllllll, what I would do, if I were you, is try & get ahold of this chick, yourself. Tell her, her beau is getting antsy & she better come clean, tout suite.
 
That is what I was thinking, but how could I do that without her knowing he put me up to it. Just on the off chance she is trying to be upfront and things just went much faster than she anticipated.

On his end he has told his whole family, friends etc that they are going to get married and she is having his baby (not why they are getting married, that was decided before hand)

I do have a way out I think possibly and without having to lie and get her to cough it up

part of her yahoo handle is her first name and the rest of it contain the letters MRK

We have been trying to figure that out and he never asked her as he didn't really pay attention to it since most people just pick something that works

But her maiden name starts with M, her first married name starts with R and her hyphenated second married name starts with K.

I am gonna hit her up on that tonight if she comes online and see if I can get her to come clean or if she will lie some more.
 
You know, I would not tell her that I know, nor would I tell your friend just yet. I would see if she volunteers the truth to him or whether she is going to make up another lie to mask the one she already told. If she lies to mask the lie she told before, I would fill him in on the truth.

Lying about still being married is a MAJOR lie!!!! Very unfair. I would call the whole thing off if I were him.

On two different occassions, I had men lie to me about how many children they had. One told me he had 2 when he had three. The other told me he had one when he had two. I forgave both of them, but they both ended up being liars on much larger levels. Fact is, that is a big red flag into their personality. Lying is just like waking up in the morning and taking a pee. No big deal. I have learned my lesson, and if I caught a guy in this kind of lie ever again, I wouldn't even give him the time of day to explain.

He should run, not walk, away from this girl.
 
and what would he do about his baby? I mean she lied to him or omitted the facts if you will, so unless he wants to be a part of the baby's life how in the hell would he get out of that one! She says she won't have an abortion that is out of the question.

She has promised to tell him everything as soon as she is ready to and has asked him to be patient with her. I can understand the abusive aspects of the relationship and maybe she is still afraid of the guy and maybe afraid that my friend would do the same.

But shit, she is gonna start showing in another month and she told him she doesn't want to get married while she is pregnant unless it is important to him to be married before the child is born. I personally would go for being married prior to since he asked and she said yes before they knew they were gonna have a baby.
 
She's a shady operator. He should even question whether the kid is his. Guys are too quick to dismiss what women do that's wrong. If the situation was reversed and it was the guy behaving this shady, no one would even be debating what she should do.
 
chesty said:
and what would he do about his baby? I mean she lied to him or omitted the facts if you will, so unless he wants to be a part of the baby's life how in the hell would he get out of that one! She says she won't have an abortion that is out of the question.

She has promised to tell him everything as soon as she is ready to and has asked him to be patient with her. I can understand the abusive aspects of the relationship and maybe she is still afraid of the guy and maybe afraid that my friend would do the same.

But shit, she is gonna start showing in another month and she told him she doesn't want to get married while she is pregnant unless it is important to him to be married before the child is born. I personally would go for being married prior to since he asked and she said yes before they knew they were gonna have a baby.
Click to expand...
Honestly, it is up to him whether he still wants to marry her or not. I don't think I would trust her, though. If they don't get married, and it were me in his situation, I would require a paternity test. If the results established I was the father, I would seek court ordered visitation with my child and pay my child support.
 
Damn. Better him than me.
 
chesty said:
and what would he do about his baby? I mean she lied to him or omitted the facts if you will, so unless he wants to be a part of the baby's life how in the hell would he get out of that one! She says she won't have an abortion that is out of the question.

She has promised to tell him everything as soon as she is ready to and has asked him to be patient with her. I can understand the abusive aspects of the relationship and maybe she is still afraid of the guy and maybe afraid that my friend would do the same.

But shit, she is gonna start showing in another month and she told him she doesn't want to get married while she is pregnant unless it is important to him to be married before the child is born. I personally would go for being married prior to since he asked and she said yes before they knew they were gonna have a baby.
Click to expand...


He should marry her while she's still married. If things don't work out he can claim the marriage isn't legal, cause she is already married and not have to get ass raped in court. Just looking at the positives. I know from personal experience once you start a lie it keeps rolling into a bigger one. Usually it is a lie in the beginning when things arent serious, so the intent isn't to hurt someone. i don't think she is being malicious, just scared now that things have gotten really serious.
 
I have talked to him about her before, I believe she is being truthful to him about everything except the still being married part and having already filed for divorce.

The kid is his as she was on her period apparently the first time they did it and then just a few days later as well just after it ended. Could she have nailed some dude in those 3 days, possibly, but not likely. He has a rare blood type and she is a universal donor so he says, so a paternity test wouldn't be tough. He wouldn't pay child support, she makes like 2 and half times what he does.
 
It just occured to me that after that whole lie about the hospital, how does he even know for sure shes preggo
 
If this is just something that has come up this weekend, then I'd give her a day or two, but this is obviously a big freekin deal. If she's putting him off, then very soon after a day or two, I think its only appropriate that your friend say "I need you to talk to me or I'll be looking into it myself..." Basically an ultimatum...

If she makes that much more than he does, it seems sort of strange that she would be stringign him along, but in general I just think its shitty when people don't tie up their loose ends before getting someone else involved.
 
chesty said:
I have talked to him about her before, I believe she is being truthful to him about everything except the still being married part and having already filed for divorce.

The kid is his as she was on her period apparently the first time they did it and then just a few days later as well just after it ended. Could she have nailed some dude in those 3 days, possibly, but not likely. He has a rare blood type and she is a universal donor so he says, so a paternity test wouldn't be tough. He wouldn't pay child support, she makes like 2 and half times what he does.
Click to expand...
He would still have to pay child support. =-)

So, they did it once when her period was just over a few days and then they did it again just a few days after her period. Normally, we women ovulate during the middle part of our cycle, not just after our periods.
 
yes, I know that, but my ex could get pregnant on her period. Well, her mom is supposed to be calling him this week and they are supposed to get together with her family, father, mother, etc to celebrate the whole getting married thing, it will have been a month and she might be showing, if she isn't showing in a couple of months then I would say he is getting strung along. She is a small thing and would show rather quickly.
 
okay, so I was talking to her and i asked her about her screen name and she said it was partially her last name, so I told her I got the r and the m but couldn't figure out the k (the dude she is still married too). She just said it was a personal thing, so I left it at that.
 
chesty said:
yes, I know that, but my ex could get pregnant on her period. Well, her mom is supposed to be calling him this week and they are supposed to get together with her family, father, mother, etc to celebrate the whole getting married thing, it will have been a month and she might be showing, if she isn't showing in a couple of months then I would say he is getting strung along. She is a small thing and would show rather quickly.
Click to expand...
I think it is impossible to get pregnant on your period. ??? You have shed the lining to which an egg would implant, and eggs don't come down at that time. ??? This girl sounds entirely FOS
 
Here is a conversation he just had with her and then a few minutes later while they were talking about the wedding she just abruptly logged off again.

Her: are you in a rush when it comes to us?
Him: meaning?
Her: exactly what I mean and said
Her: no answer?
Him: I would like to have you up here with me so that I can be a full part of your life and our baby's. I can't be that with you so far away and I am willing to live with you until the wedding we agreed to May 5th 2007.
Her: might be sooner, if that's okay?
Him: You moving in?
Him: Yes, that would be okay
Her: I still have alot of thinking and figuring out to do, just be patient with me
Him: Okay, I am patient, may not seem like it, but what would be sooner if that is okay with me?
Her: just don't push me or smoother me, not right now, too much going on....I know that may not sound right, but it;s the only way I can express what I"m feeling right now
Him: Am i smothering you or pushing you?
Her: I knew you wouldn't get it...Oh Forget it....
Him: explain it to me, I am trying okay?
Her: Forget it, just be patient w/me please...things will happen as they should
Him: okay, I will be patient with you.
Him: I'm sorry you have so much going on, I will do my best and if I seem to slip let me know and let me know how you feel so I can do the right things for you.
Her: thank you...I just need time to sort things out and make things work, I appreciate you wanting to help, but I can do it myself, if I need help, I will ask, promise
Him: okay
Him: If you want to move in sooner or get married sooner I am ready whenever you are and it is okay, just let me know and I will have things ready for you.
Him: just letting you know it is okay like you asked me a few minutes ago
Her: ok

I call your attention to the bolded lines. Now, did she just ask him he was in a rush concerning them? and he responded that he thought she should be up here with him so he can be a part of their life full time
and didn't she say that it could be sooner if that was okay with him?

And then is it me or did she just fly off on a tangent 180 fucking degrees to what she just said?

No wonder this poor guy is confused. He told me she thought he was being insecure because he felt like she was not wanting to talk to him. It was mothers day and her and the kids hung out all day, movie, dinner etc, but she apparently never informed him that they were going to do this and that she was going to hang with them. So her lack of communication translates to being insecure?

I'm lost, is anyone else? I might be telling him to run for the fucking moon.
 
you sure that the baby is your friends??


Dunno.....the hospital thing is weird
 
Wow. You're friend is a punk (no offense). He should ask her for his balls back and run. He could tell her "Honey, I'm just throwing this out there, don't get upset...but do you think I could have my balls back for a while. It's been a while since I saw them, and I'd just like to hold them for a little while.

Her: What

Him: I was just kidding.I love you. Keep them as long as you like
 
That is what I was thinking, but you know what they say about love? It is blind and will cause a man to do some pretty stupid shit, including surrendering his balls for that little wet hole.

He is sure. He will know shortly anyway, the first time he goes to the doctors office with her and they do the blood tests. Apparently she can only have babies with someone who has negative type blood or she has to get shots to prevent her from dying. There are not that many people in the world with negative type blood and the chance of her nailing some other dude in the 3 days after her period to when he nailed her again, is pretty remote. He could've knocked her up while she was on her period.

Balls, I still got mine. I give you one chance, you get to lie to me once or omit the truth, after that your fucking done. You get no chances if you chet on me, don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out of my house.
 
Dude, this guy is DELUSIONAL!!!! He couldn't have knocked her up on her period, and it is so obvious that she is fucking around that it is just crazy. Whenever people are that inconvenient to reach and are acting that shady, it's normally because they are fucking around. She is most likely stringing him along in case her first choice of partner falls through. So, unless he happy to be the second string bf, he should move along.
 
Even if all the rest didn't exist this is a girl who has already been married twice, and accepted a third proposal without even being out of the second marriage (which she didnt bother mentioning to her new fiancee). There is nothing more to think about. He's an idiot if he doesn't move on.
 
I would agree, but it is his life and I can only tell him what I think and try to support him in his roles.

On the period thing, it does happen, my sister got pregnant twice when she was on her period. I would say though that it is rare.

I hope things happen soon for this guy, I hate seeing him so beside himself and feeling like he has to walk on eggshells. I think the litmus test will be if 1. her mom actually calls and talks to him, 2. If he actually meets her parents in two weeks as planned along with the rest of the family. I a sure her mom knows she is still married and getting divorced, I can't see her not telling him even if her daughter asked her not to say anything. I wonder if that is what she is waiting for? For her mom to spill it.

at any rate my boy needs his set back, that I agree with.
 
Phenom78 said:
Even if all the rest didn't exist this is a girl who has already been married twice, and accepted a third proposal without even being out of the second marriage (which she didnt bother mentioning to her new fiancee). There is nothing more to think about. He's an idiot if he doesn't move on.
Click to expand...
EXACTLY!
 
planning to get married beore living together plus only talking via IM?? Recipe for a disaster already. People amaze me that they think they know someone just by talking IM, sharing some nights together, and never actually living together.
 
I never believed in living together anyway, so if it was me that wouldn't be how I would base my decision to marry. I lived with someone once and it failed, I didn't live with them and it failed, dated them both long term and they both failed.

I think in todays society there is much more to consider
 
Okay, here is something else he just sent me. There are so many red flags it isn't even funny.

She asked him if he expected her to contribute to the household support and then informed him that he should know her alimony will end once they get married! How the fuck can you get alimony if you are already married? Unless she is referring to her current soon to be ex and the money he might be sending her already. In that case sh isn't lying just not telling the truth about which ex it is coming from.

This shit gets better and better. I am going to write a book on this when it is all over!
 
why are they having serious talks about their future over instant messenger?
 
chesty said:
She asked him if he expected her to contribute to the household support and then informed him that he should know her alimony will end once they get married! How the fuck can you get alimony if you are already married?
Click to expand...

I think that was to cover her tracks since you/he only know about the first husband as of now (so she thinks). I started reading your post giving her the benny of the doubt but i'm liking this less and less. On the off chance that you are wrong, come at her like "I'm just looking out for my friend" and "I just don't trust you women".
Really bad sign to be keeping something this big from him this late in the game.
 
got me, but he gotta she better shit or get off the pot for his sake. I would say if she isn't moving up to be with him in the next couple of weeks he should rethink the whole thing.
 
No, you are hoping for the wrong outcome. Hopefully, she will show her true colors and won't move up there and marry him or she will ruin his life. Getting married won't change her or the situation, except for making it harder for him to extricate himself from the whole mess.
 
true. On the off chance she is sincere and is going to tell him everything, is there a way he could confront her without putting her on the defensive? I would hate to see him push it and lose out and she is sincere and just got her timing screwed up. I do know she left and is divorcing the guy because of physical abuse and while that doesn't excuse her current behavior, I can understand some of it from being a cop. I dont' want to see him ruin his life either way.
 
Okay, so now he asks the questions in a roundabout way of when she is moving up to be with him etc.

Her first reply was she will be moving in with him in June and it was stated as fact so he tells me. This sounds to me like a do or die thing, if she trips on that I say run like a bitch in heat!

On the baby, she wants to wait to tell the kids until after the first tri mester just in case something happens. I can see this as it would probably upset the kids more than the adults, but it leaves it open so that after she is moved in, she conveniently, but with tears has a miscarriage. See where I am going with this? He might be getting his ass set up. He has shit for finances, but his heart is what I am worried about more than anything else.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

B
Napsgear Which NapsGear domain is legit?
Replies
21
Views
766
the_alcatraz
the_alcatraz
M
LOG JOURNAL MUSCLEMATRIX ENTRY 1
Replies
0
Views
111
moonshadow_shadowmoon
M
N
best bread options
Replies
21
Views
3K
Noah Wixx
Noah Wixx
B
Scam or who Raptor labs?
Replies
21
Views
3K
the_alcatraz
the_alcatraz
Noah Wixx
Approved US-PHARMACIES TD/Review
Replies
11
Views
1K
ballin2504
ballin2504
Top Bottom