IMHO sorry to bust your bubble but a chunkie heel is waaaaaaaaaaay out for wear with a dress.
I don't understand why the hot pink sling backs are out? I think that they would be the perfect way to liven up your outfit. Matching your shoes to your handbag is outdated so you can comfortable wear the pink shoes with a black bag.
Could you post up pics of the dress so I can guide you better about accesorizing? Some bold jewelry would also bring the dress to life.
I know what you are saying about the boots but if you wore boots with the fishnets it would make the outfit much more fashionable without looking too *slutty*. I would even wear the fishnets with the hot pink slingbacks but that is my style, over the top. If you aren't 100% comfortable, I wouldn't wear it.
Did you ever think to pick up a pair of cute little heels to go with the dress? Animal print are VERY HOT this season. Stop by DSW and pick up a pair. I am certain you could find suitable shoes for under 40 bucks.