Thoughts on relationship(help)

[chris302001]

As long as they're open relationships....

LOL, and she brings other chicks in.........

 

[calveless wonder]

Don't be in a relationship.

Bang anyone you want.

 

[velvett]

Recently I have found myself in a relationship and most parts of it are great. Previously I have been hooking up with hot younger ladies for sex though, which was great. I want both, the qualities the wiser, more mature lady offers but the hot sex from the younger hammers. Any advice on how to handle this?

Find a "mature" woman that enjoys the same kind of sex as you and likes to keep her figure.

Or learn to compromise and decide what will mean the most to you after you've been with someone for 10-15 years.

 

[Bikini Mod]

I'm misrepresenting myself here I think. Actually I would like to be with her long term, just not now. I mean if she wants to hang out now that is great but I have so many other goals I am trying to achieve that I don't want the weight of a full relationship. That is why I was talking about leaving the sex out, to keep it simple. Sex usually translates to love and I'm not looking for that now, I want friendship, companionship, support both ways, and advice(not responsibility and reliability).

Honestly, with all due respect, I call bullshit.

If you wanted to end up with her then other women would have ZERO appeal to you.

I think you don't know WHAT you want (no harm there, that is part of life).

You sound like you want a fuck buddy and there ain't nuthin wrong with that, however, you can not ask a woman to step back from what she THINKS is a committed relationship to fuck buddies with the promise that MAYBE you will want to commit to her later on.

A man will NEVER respect a fuck buddy the way that he would a woman that he wants to elevate to the status of life partner. Why should he? If she allows herself to be treated that way then he will never EVER see her any other way then just as the cow who gave away the milk for free. If she is happy with being viewed that way by a man who *supposedly* respects her, then that is good for her too.... no?

Just be honest with her and tell her straight up the way you told us here, "I do want to be with you longterm someday but NOT NOW. NOW I just want to fuck you when we are both up for it but then WE CAN BOTH fuck other people when we really don't feel like fucking one another or when the thought of fucking someone else is more appealing to either one of us."

^^^ Dunno bout you, but that wouldn't sound appealing to a woman who wanted more than *just fucking* from her man. If she IS down for that, then as I said - YOU BOTH WIN.

I mean, she gets to view the relationship through the same eyes, doesn't she?

 

[ricco561]

Honestly, with all due respect, I call bullshit.

If you wanted to end up with her then other women would have ZERO appeal to you.

I think you don't know WHAT you want (no harm there, that is part of life).

You sound like you want a fuck buddy and there ain't nuthin wrong with that, however, you can not ask a woman to step back from what she THINKS is a committed relationship to fuck buddies with the promise that MAYBE you will want to commit to her later on.

A man will NEVER respect a fuck buddy the way that he would a woman that he wants to elevate to the status of life partner. Why should he? If she allows herself to be treated that way then he will never EVER see her any other way then just as the cow who gave away the milk for free. If she is happy with being viewed that way by a man who *supposedly* respects her, then that is good for her too.... no?

Just be honest with her and tell her straight up the way you told us here, "I do want to be with you longterm someday but NOT NOW. NOW I just want to fuck you when we are both up for it but then WE CAN BOTH fuck other people when we really don't feel like fucking one another or when the thought of fucking someone else is more appealing to either one of us."

^^^ Dunno bout you, but that wouldn't sound appealing to a woman who wanted more than *just fucking* from her man. If she IS down for that, then as I said - YOU BOTH WIN.

I mean, she gets to view the relationship through the same eyes, doesn't she?

You make fuckbuddy sound like it's a dirty thing.

 

[Bikini Mod]

You make fuckbuddy sound like it's a dirty thing.

Not at all. There is a time and a place for every sort of situation but any woman who thinks that a man who views her as a fuck buddy will EVER view her as anything other than that is bigtime fooling herself.

"I am woman, hear me roar. I pay my own way and can take care of myself."

Mhm...

If your man won't commit to you then guess what? You (as a lady) aren't exactly who you thought you were to your man.

(I know that I will get a whole shitstorm of heat for that point of view but hey, I am a big girl and I can take it.)

As long as everyone is a consenting adult then who are we to judge? But if a man isn't completely upfront with his intentions then that is plain wrong.

Being a fuckbuddy is also very beneficial for the woman. She doesn't have to put up listening to his whiny bullshit drama EVER. She just gets pleased and leaves when SHE gets off. But if she doesn't know from the word jump that that is all the relationship is ever going to be then that isn't fair. If she is told and continues to lie to herself well then, she just isn't very bright... is she?

Any woman who is merely a fuckbuddy (no matter how she sugarcoats it for herself or how he sugarcoats it for her) and thinks that that man will ever view her or respect her as anything more is well, delusional. And any woman who would WANT to commit to a man who is merely her fuckbuddy thinks even less of herself than HE thinks of her.

Men don't work that way and I am not saying they should. A man should never lower his standards, just as a woman shouldn't.