The Lestat Chronicles (pt. 2)

[Lestat]

Ok another little ramble.

This one has nothing to do with EF directly this time, more about life in general.

I am always amazed at how much personal growth takes place over time. Myself, as with most people, are completely different now than they were 10 years ago. I'm not talking physically, although that can be dramatic, but mentally.

I remember growing up, my adolecent years were tough. Well, I thought they were. They weren't really, but I didn't know that then. Things felt tough.

I got bad grades. I got into stupid type of trouble (stealing shit for no reason, fucking around with people's shit, etc).

I used to continually live my life thinking to myself "If only I could go back and re-live those last couple of years, I'd be able to do so much better now"

I remember living with this feeling from around 4th to 8th grade. I wished there was a save button like in video games that I could just return to the place I had last saved and try again.

Then, in 9th grade, something changed. Something finally clicked. I realized, if I lived my life in a way I was proud of, I'd no longer want to go back and re live period of it. I started to get good grades (straight As) do things that I was proud of, like play sports, make good quality friends, etc.

I remember specifically at the end of my 9th grade year thinking to myself that there is no way I'd want to go back and re do that last year. Why? Well for one, I put a lot of hard work into it, but also, I was very happy with the results of that time, with my actions, behaviors, and even thought progression.

Since then, I've never wanted to go back and "re do" any part of my life. I live each day in a way that I know I can look back upon in the future and be proud of. I'm not perfect, never will be, still make mistakes, still have individual moments that I may not be the most proud of, but as a whole I live a life that I can look back upon know I did my very best for myself, and those that I love.

 

[cindylou]

You are lucky that you learned that in the 9th grade and not later.

 

[jh1]

I bet you parents want a 'redo' on the night you were conceived.

fack.

 

[redguru]

You have more angst than an emo kid on clomid.

 

[Lestat]

You have more angst than an emo kid on clomid.

I may have when I was 12 or 13, but I was luckily freed from that early on.

Now I just retrace the past for the purposes of understanding. I look around at other people and see many out there that are angry or sad, sometimes both, and wonder, how do people with the same privledges in life end up at such vastly different places? Is it as simple as mental attitude? perspective? the ability to look within oneself for answers? Or it is a brain chemistry thing?

 

[Lestat]

I bet you parents want a 'redo' on the night you were conceived.

fack.

i often wonder what place those types of comments come from. A reflection of yourself perhaps?

 

[Smurfy]

lestat do you have any siblings? and how did they turn out? similar to you?

 

[jh1]

i often wonder what place those types of comments come from. A reflection of yourself perhaps?

You 'often wonder' about that?

You're so deep Lestat.

'Perhaps'.... 'The Chronicles' ....

Shit nug.... PBS wants their dialog back.... stop trying so hard to be such a deep deep thinker....

 

[Nobledude]

Ok another little ramble.

This one has nothing to do with EF directly this time, more about life in general.

I am always amazed at how much personal growth takes place over time. Myself, as with most people, are completely different now than they were 10 years ago. I'm not talking physically, although that can be dramatic, but mentally.

I remember growing up, my adolecent years were tough. Well, I thought they were. They weren't really, but I didn't know that then. Things felt tough.

I got bad grades. I got into stupid type of trouble (stealing shit for no reason, fucking around with people's shit, etc).

I used to continually live my life thinking to myself "If only I could go back and re-live those last couple of years, I'd be able to do so much better now"

I remember living with this feeling from around 4th to 8th grade. I wished there was a save button like in video games that I could just return to the place I had last saved and try again.

Then, in 9th grade, something changed. Something finally clicked. I realized, if I lived my life in a way I was proud of, I'd no longer want to go back and re live period of it. I started to get good grades (straight As) do things that I was proud of, like play sports, make good quality friends, etc.

I remember specifically at the end of my 9th grade year thinking to myself that there is no way I'd want to go back and re do that last year. Why? Well for one, I put a lot of hard work into it, but also, I was very happy with the results of that time, with my actions, behaviors, and even thought progression.

Since then, I've never wanted to go back and "re do" any part of my life. I live each day in a way that I know I can look back upon in the future and be proud of. I'm not perfect, never will be, still make mistakes, still have individual moments that I may not be the most proud of, but as a whole I live a life that I can look back upon know I did my very best for myself, and those that I love.

when is the book coming out ?

 

[Lestat]

lestat do you have any siblings? and how did they turn out? similar to you?

two brothers.

We're all very different, but similar in some big ways.

They are 27 and 24 (I am 30).

We are different in the sense that I am the only one with a college degree (and I have two). I went away to school at 18, never moved back home (except for 2 summers). Youngest went to college at 18, struggled early, dropped out, hasn't gotten back and now works full time in retail. (graveyard shift though managing the nightly re-stock).

Middle one struggled most. Lived at home until 25. Some community college but never taken classes at a 4 year. Works in a pathology lab now. Intereting work, but entry level type stuff. Doesn't seem too satisfied.

I am not religious, the middle one is VERY devout. Jesus is a big part of his life and so is regular attendance at church. Youngest one is funny. He's 5'9" (both me and the other brother are 6'+) He has red hair (which he's losing at jh1 type rates) and freckles. Least athletic of the three, but was ok at band, though not great. Very cynical now. I think you and jackangel would get along with him well. I get along with him pretty good, although we don't see each other often.

Middle one and I fought non stop growing up. I was jealous of him, he was jealous of me. Jealous of the attention that each got from their parents. He of course thought my parents favored me. Jealous of privledges I had (I was 3+ years older!), of my friends, my grades, what I did in sports. He'd sleepwalk at night and take all of my trophies and what not you get from playing in sports and put them in his room.

It ended up that he would basically try to get me in trouble with my parents (thus making him look better) at every turn. This resulted in there being zero trust between he and I (and there still isn't). I always wanted a brother who was a confidant, someone I could address the challenges and struggles of being a kid with together. Instead I had a guy who was insanely jealousy of me to the point he'd lie or do anything to make my life hell. Not saying I didn't do the same to him though. He was teased and picked on. And if he was hoping for an older bro that would come to his defense in a moment when faced with the cruel world full of adolecent peers, I certainly failed at that.

We're all amicable now, but no one lives in the same city, although we are all in California.

 

[Lestat]

You 'often wonder' about that?

You're so deep Lestat.

'Perhaps'.... 'The Chronicles' ....

Shit nug.... PBS wants their dialog back.... stop trying so hard to be such a deep deep thinker....

continue to trivialize others all you want, if that is what makes you feel like a better man.

 

[jh1]

continue to trivialize others all you want, if that is what makes you feel like a better man.

LMFAo....


Holy shit bro.... uptight much?

 

[Smurfy]

interesting
i figured you'd have brothers who were more like you in a lot of ways

 

[Smurfy]

wait a minute
hold up
did you call me cynical?

 

[Smurfy]

do you ever say to your brother: "Hey, you'd think since you're such a devout Christian that Jesus or God would have helped you out along the way. instead, look at you. You're a pile of crap. God must hate you if he even exists that it. And look at me - I'm doing very well for myself. And i havent had to go to church at all in the last 20 yrs. So what's up with that you bible thumper?"

Cuz that would make this story more enjoyable for me

 

[jh1]

do you ever say to your brother: "Hey, you'd think since you're such a devout Christian that Jesus or God would have helped you out along the way. instead, look at you. You're a pile of crap. God must hate you if he even exists that it. And look at me - I'm doing very well for myself. And i havent had to go to church at all in the last 20 yrs. So what's up with that you bible thumper?"

Cuz that would make this story more enjoyable for me

Lestat did say that to his brother.

To which his brother replied:

"i often wonder what place those types of comments come from. A reflection of yourself perhaps?"

And his other brother chimed in with:

"Bad Bro Material"

 

[Lestat]

do you ever say to your brother: "Hey, you'd think since you're such a devout Christian that Jesus or God would have helped you out along the way. instead, look at you. You're a pile of crap. God must hate you if he even exists that it. And look at me - I'm doing very well for myself. And i havent had to go to church at all in the last 20 yrs. So what's up with that you bible thumper?"

Cuz that would make this story more enjoyable for me

No.

I don't think that would be a kind thing to say. I don't think it would help him in any way. I do discuss religion with him, at length, and my reasons for non belief and his resons for sustained belief. I don't ever make it personal though. I talk the same way with my parents. Its fun, interesting, and sheds a lot of light on each other's world perspectives. My mom has a hard time with it. She believes what she wants to and doesn't want to put a ton of critical thought into it. My dad is more like me, and its been interesting to see how his beliefs have evolved over the years.

Sorry, I didn't mean to call you cynical. My little brother is, and I think you and he would get along, I can't explain exactly why. I just had a feeling. Wasn't an insult.

My other brother isn't a pile of crap either. I have some cousins (one of which who comitted suicide recently) who would fit that term better, but even then I wouldn't apply it to them as they have yet to harm anyone else but themselves (and unfortunately their children) so far. I like to think everyone still has a chance, but for some its a lot less likely. My brother has just had a lot of issues. Mental illness for which he's seen a ton of shrinks and taken a dozen different meds. I am not sure how seriously my dad takes it, my mom is sympathetic though and they still talk daily.

Also, sadly, my brother really doesn't care so much. He feels he has a greater life ahead of him, and this one is hardly consequential to anyone, even himself. He basically think I should enjoy whatever things I enjoy now, because as an atheist, I've got an eternity of hell ahead of me.

 

[ceo]

And if he was hoping for an older bro that would come to his defense in a moment when faced with the cruel world full of adolecent peers, I certainly failed at that.

Way to go older brother. My next oldest brother didn't get along with any of the rest of us, and sounds quite a bit like your bro. But, if I was in trouble and he was there or heard about it, he would always come to my aid. That's what family does.

Once a group of older kids (maybe 5 of them about 5-7 yrs. older than me) jumped me while I was riding my bicycle. I was about 7 or so. They stole my watch (it was the only thing I had of any value except my bike and I don't know why they didn't take that). I went home and told my dad and brother what happened and my brother was the first one to jump. He grabbed a baseball bat and my dad and him drove down there.

My dad pulled up to this group of kids and got out telling them he wanted the watch back and they acted like they didn't know what he was talking about. My brother came around the front of the truck with bat in hand and they quickly handed over the watch explaining they were "just playing". None of them were harmed.

Family bro...family. Don't always like them or get along but when shit goes down, you're there for them.

 

[binö]

fuck i'd love to go back ten yrs and re-do some mistakes
i wish i could get over that feeling but i can't
if i could turn back time
if i could find a way

 

[Lestat]

Way to go older brother. My next oldest brother didn't get along with any of the rest of us, and sounds quite a bit like your bro. But, if I was in trouble and he was there or heard about it, he would always come to my aid. That's what family does.

Once a group of older kids (maybe 5 of them about 5-7 yrs. older than me) jumped me while I was riding my bicycle. I was about 7 or so. They stole my watch (it was the only thing I had of any value except my bike and I don't know why they didn't take that). I went home and told my dad and brother what happened and my brother was the first one to jump. He grabbed a baseball bat and my dad and him drove down there.

My dad pulled up to this group of kids and got out telling them he wanted the watch back and they acted like they didn't know what he was talking about. My brother came around the front of the truck with bat in hand and they quickly handed over the watch explaining they were "just playing". None of them were harmed.

Family bro...family. Don't always like them or get along but when shit goes down, you're there for them.

i agree with ya man. I see that now.

 

[ceo]

Way to go older brother. My next oldest brother didn't get along with any of the rest of us, and sounds quite a bit like your bro. But, if I was in trouble and he was there or heard about it, he would always come to my aid. That's what family does.

Once a group of older kids (maybe 5 of them about 5-7 yrs. older than me) jumped me while I was riding my bicycle. I was about 7 or so. They stole my watch (it was the only thing I had of any value except my bike and I don't know why they didn't take that). I went home and told my dad and brother what happened and my brother was the first one to jump. He grabbed a baseball bat and my dad and him drove down there.

My dad pulled up to this group of kids and got out telling them he wanted the watch back and they acted like they didn't know what he was talking about. My brother came around the front of the truck with bat in hand and they quickly handed over the watch explaining they were "just playing". None of them were harmed.

Family bro...family. Don't always like them or get along but when shit goes down, you're there for them.

oh...go re-live that.

also, bro, you know I love you...but this whole thread reaks of, "look at me, I'm so good, I'm better than most, I recognized early in life (earlier than most) the path to better living, blah, blah, etc."

Like you're looking for an e-pat-on-the-back, yet saying you deserve it because you're somehow a better person than the rest of the minions who weren't able to come to the same epiphany at the same moment or at any moment in their life so far. -See quote below and see how it reads...

I look around at other people and see many out there that are angry or sad, sometimes both, and wonder, how do people with the same privledges in life end up at such vastly different places? Is it as simple as mental attitude? perspective? the ability to look within oneself for answers? Or it is a brain chemistry thing?

Not trying to bash. Maybe this wasn't the way you intended it to sound/read, but that's how it came across to me.

 

[Lestat]

oh...go re-live that.

also, bro, you know I love you...but this whole thread reaks of, "look at me, I'm so good, I'm better than most, I recognized early in life (earlier than most) the path to better living, blah, blah, etc."

Like you're looking for an e-pat-on-the-back, yet saying you deserve it because you're somehow a better person than the rest of the minions who weren't able to come to the same epiphany at the same moment or at any moment in their life so far. -See quote below and see how it reads...



Not trying to bash. Maybe this wasn't the way you intended it to sound/read, but that's how it came across to me.

not how I am trying to come off bro. just talking through how I got to be where I'm at today.

I'm curious to see what growth will take place over the next 30 years of life.

 

[Lestat]

oh...go re-live that.

also, bro, you know I love you...but this whole thread reaks of, "look at me, I'm so good, I'm better than most, I recognized early in life (earlier than most) the path to better living, blah, blah, etc."

Like you're looking for an e-pat-on-the-back, yet saying you deserve it because you're somehow a better person than the rest of the minions who weren't able to come to the same epiphany at the same moment or at any moment in their life so far. -See quote below and see how it reads...



Not trying to bash. Maybe this wasn't the way you intended it to sound/read, but that's how it came across to me.

sucks though man, I think i come off that way in real life too. I am not quick to pass judgement on others though, and fully realize that there are a million different ways to live a happy life. What works for me doesn't work for everyone.

 

[nimbus]

'stat's a good bro bu fuck jh1 had me lol'ing for a good 30 seconds total in this thread

 

[all the whey]

You are lucky that you learned that in the 9th grade and not later.

So, in 9th grade he decide to be average and bang only average girls?

 

[all the whey]

I bet you parents want a 'redo' on the night you were conceived.

fack.

 

[all the whey]

fuck i'd love to go back ten yrs and re-do some mistakes
i wish i could get over that feeling but i can't
if i could turn back time
if i could find a way

So does this girl.

 

[binö]

bro i lol'ed at that for a few months.
untill you post up pics i'm thinking you're a bitch

 

[swole]

i often wonder how many people are more smug than lestat

yes!!! swole is an angry and ugly person!@!! he must be to be mean to ME!! ME !!! !out of all people!! the deepest reflector of all thinkers!!! the best hi-fiver of children who will be the best dad ever! ME!!!!!omfg@@@!

nobody is mean to a person who deep thinks thoughts such mine and posts about them. NOBODY!!! ME!?!?

[/smug]

 

[all the whey]

bro i lol'ed at that for a few months.
untill you post up pics i'm thinking you're a bitch

I said I would.

 

[Wulfgar]

this is nothing like the chronicles of riddick

 

[Lestat]

i often wonder how many people are more smug than lestat

yes!!! swole is an angry and ugly person!@!! he must be to be mean to ME!! ME !!! !out of all people!! the deepest reflector of all thinkers!!! the best hi-fiver of children who will be the best dad ever! ME!!!!!omfg@@@!

nobody is mean to a person who deep thinks thoughts such mine and posts about them. NOBODY!!! ME!?!?

[/smug]

lol. good example of how different things work for different people bro.

i guess smug is a good word, i come off as smug.

I won't say what you come off as, that wouldn't be smug of me, that'd just be mean.

 

[swole]

lol. good example of how different things work for different people bro.

i guess smug is a good word, i come off as smug.

I won't say what you come off as, that wouldn't be smug of me, that'd just be mean.

 

[Lestat]

lol.

did you see the south park episode on smugness?

 

[swole]

lol.

did you see the south park episode on smugness?

no time for tv. i was busy reflecting upon my life.

 

[swole]

 

[swole]

 

[all the whey]

lolololololololololo

 

[swole]

lolololololololololo

he is the best in his family!!

 

[swole]

oh...go re-live that.

also, bro, you know I love you...but this whole thread reaks of, "look at me, I'm so good, I'm better than most, I recognized early in life (earlier than most) the path to better living, blah, blah, etc."

Like you're looking for an e-pat-on-the-back, yet saying you deserve it because you're somehow a better person than the rest of the minions who weren't able to come to the same epiphany at the same moment or at any moment in their life so far. -See quote below and see how it reads...



Not trying to bash. Maybe this wasn't the way you intended it to sound/read, but that's how it came across to me.

 

[binö]

smuggyness has a "y" in it bro

 

[swole]

 

[swole]

 

[Lestat]

i hate having to wear shoes, ever

 

[swole]

i hate having to wear shoes, ever

i see a pair of neon green crocs in your future.

 

[Lestat]

i see a pair of neon green crocs in your future.

i'd get black. I almost did, but Nordstrom didn't have my size.

my roommate has 3 or 4 pairs of them, also made enough with their stock to buy his car cash. (14,000 or so).