T-Cake's 2006 Log

[T-Cake]

Awww, I love you girls!!! That just made me feel a lot better.

You're right, Jen -- I do have great support here and from my family and from curgeo and Ulter especially... I need it so badly right now, and everyone has just been great with me.

Argh -- just hit send too early! I had to edit this!!!

Miss24K -- I you still. Thanks for sayin' I'm part of 'da fam' Feels pretty good to be a part of something.

I've just been too consumed the last couple days to be on here and update my log, so maybe I'll take the time to do that now. I missed my upper body lift tonight because my mom came by unexpectedly at 5pm... talked with me until 7pm... and then we finally finished dinner by 9pm. *sigh* Gym closes at 10 and upper body takes me FOREVER... I'm just annoyed I didn't get it in.. but I did get my cardio in this morning, so at least that was done.

T-Cake's MEGA NUTRITION UPDATE

Saturday, June 17, 2006

Exercise & Lifting:
* Had weigh-in in the morning, so didn't do cardio and lifting until midday.
* Lower body lift and ab work first and then 60 minute outside walk around 11am.

Food Log

B @ WWers meeting -- 8:30am
TJ's "Handful of Almonds" Pouch
2 scoops ISO-AGB in 1 L Crystal Light

L Post-workout @ 12:30pm -- Panera Bread
Asian Sesame Chicken Salad w/ extra chicken breast
1/2 small red apple

S @ 4pm
1 T TJ's Creamy ANPB

D @ 6:30pm
8 oz ground lean turkey w/ 1/2 c. salsa mixed in and taco seasoning
3/4 sliced mushrooms
2 Don Marco "Healthy" Tortillas
1/2 c. fat free cheddar cheese
1/2 c. red seedless grapes

S @ Night
2 scoops ISO-AGB in 1 L Crystal Light

TOTALS
1694 calories
45% p / 19% c / 36% f

Sunday, June 18, 2006

Exercise & Lifting:
* No lift today.
* 60 min. outside hilly walk but NOT empty stomach today -- had Father's Day brunch in the morning earlier than expected so I had to do this midday.

Food Log:

Brunch @ 11:30am -- Chinese Buffet Restaurant
UGH!!! Talk about REALLY DIFFICULT to make good choices!
2 servings (about 1.5 c) chicken and broccoli
1 serving black pepper chicken (0.75 cups) with onions
1 c. string beans, fat added in cooking
3 pieces sushi, small slices, no sauce
2 kiwi fruit

S @ 4pm, post-workout
2 T TJ's Creamy ANPB

D @ 7pm
8 oz ground turkey with salsa and mushrooms (leftover from Sat.)
1/3 c. fat free cheddar cheese shredded on top
1 c. red seedless grapes

S @ night
TWO ISO-AGB shakes, 2 scoops of ISO in 1 L of Crystal Light each
That brunch REALLY shot up my fat content and here was no pure protein source in sight, so I had to make up for it big time!

TOTALS
1632 calories
39% p / 25% c / 35% f

Monday, June 19, 2006

Exercise & Lifting:
* 60 min. outside hilly walk at NOON on an empty stomach -- grrr! Busy morning and slept it unplanned; had to walk LATE so I didn't get to eat til LATE too!
* NO LIFT TODAY! Mom sucked up all my evening time, including all the evening gym hours, so I missed upper body. I'm sad and mad about this Oh well, out of my control, right?

Food Log:

B/L @ 2pm:
2 scoops ISO-ABG in 1 L Crystal Light
1 6 oz. salmon fillet with sauce I made from 1/3 c. ff mayo, 2 T grated parmesan cheese, 2 T chopped onion, cilantro and 1/2 T Worcestershire sauce (spread sauce on top of thawed fish and bake 20 min. at 450)
1 pint of blueberries (MMM! I was hungry!)

S @ 4pm
TJs "Handful of Almonds" Pouch
1/2 c. red seedless grapes

D @ 7pm -- Coney Island
3 cups salad greens (maybe 4...)
1/2 c. sliced beets
10 medium olives, pitted
1/4 c. feta cheese
7 oz grilled chicken breast
1/4 c. oil-free salad dressing, Greek
1/4 of large pita bread

S @ 11pm
2 scoops ISO-AGB in 1 L of Crystal Light

TOTALS
1666 calories
44% p / 25% c / 30% f

Overall, I'm hangin' in there by a thread seeing that every day is unpredictable and I've got a zillion things I'm trying to handle emotionally and physically at this point. Still annoyed that I missed lift tonight... but what can I do besides make up for it on Wednesday? I'll just have to lift upper and lower on Wednesday to make up for it all. I have the time to do it, so why not? Or should I just forego the upper and do it on Friday when I'm due for it again? Argh! Goodnight!

 

[mermaid]

Wow, T-Cake

Sometimes it's easier to love someone from a distance. Like Curgeo said, it's not your job to fix your mother.

I wish you nothing but luck on the next journey in your life

 

[T-Cake]

Wow, T-Cake

Sometimes it's easier to love someone from a distance. Like Curgeo said, it's not your job to fix your mother.

I wish you nothing but luck on the next journey in your life

You know, Merm, that is a perfect summary and you're right. It is NOT my job to fix my mom. I just need to keep reminding myself of that. Thanks, hun.

 

[sbt2082]

Hi hun!!! Just wanted to come say hi and see how you were doing... keep that head up and keep on smiling no matter what sweetie

 

[T-Cake]

Hi hun!!! Just wanted to come say hi and see how you were doing... keep that head up and keep on smiling no matter what sweetie

Thanks duckie babe! I'm tryin' to make this all wor.k!

Dad and stepmom are coming over in the morning to help me pack boxes, thank goodness. I'm just terrible when I feel overwhelmed like this -- I feel like I got nothing done today because I slept in til 10am... and didn't walk til noon... and it took me an hour on the phone just to cancel all my utilities. Argh! I have a hair appointment tomorrow so at least I can go get prettied up a little bit! Nice little break from all this!

I don't know why I'm so afraid to just pack all my stuff up and hang at dad's house until the weekend. Just nerves, I suppose.

 

[Gymgurl]

Got to look good for that man of yours!

 

[jenscats5]

Awww, I love you girls!!! That just made me feel a lot better.

You're right, Jen -- I do have great support here and from my family and from curgeo and Ulter especially... I need it so badly right now, and everyone has just been great with me.


Overall, I'm hangin' in there by a thread seeing that every day is unpredictable and I've got a zillion things I'm trying to handle emotionally and physically at this point. Still annoyed that I missed lift tonight... but what can I do besides make up for it on Wednesday? I'll just have to lift upper and lower on Wednesday to make up for it all. I have the time to do it, so why not? Or should I just forego the upper and do it on Friday when I'm due for it again? Argh! Goodnight!

You have a LOT going on right now!! So it's understandable if you miss a workout or 2....it's NOT a big deal....do what you can, when you can and once your move is complete - you can settle into a routine.....

Hang in there girl, know that you are loved & that there are people who love you - focus on that & don't let the negative-nillys bring you down or allow them to project their insecurities & negativity onto you - you are worth MORE than that!!

 

[treilin]

Thank you for your kind words, hun. It's really hard on me to think of my life without my mom -- but as of late, she causes me more grief and pain than good memories. Even just meeting her for dinner always turns into a discussion of how negative I am... or how I complain too much... or how I can't do this or that.

I hate being told I can't do something. Just drives me crazy -- and she's the queen of shooting me down.

I just found out my brother actually went to her house while I was on the phone with her because he heard her screaming at me and he went to her to say, "WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT HER LIKE THAT? Are you just trying to hurt her feelings?" and I guess my mom admitted to him that yes, she was.

And no, she still doesn't support my move or my relationships or interests -- she is happy playing the martyr in life and perservering through a life of shit and misfortune -- but me, on the other hand, I'm on the up and up. I've slimmed down, I feel awesome, I'm super happy, I'm more secure than ever... and I finally have the courage and confidence to live my life for ME!!!

Also forgot to mention to you all that after I hung up, my daddy came around the table and hugged me and told me how proud he was of me because he knew that was the hardest thing I'd done in my whole life. That felt good.

Thanks for reading all my crap... I appreciate the support, even when it's not training related.

Hmmm Girlie
I'm just now catching up on your log after the weekend...
Mom's are funny creatures. One minute they are supportive the next they are cutting you down. I think some of it has to do with the baby boomer age group.... I mean it wasn't until really the next generation before women really started standing on their own two feet and were not quite as submissive. It's almost a jealousy that they see what we are capable of and doing and they wish they were as strong as we are and not relying on someone else to take care of them. They have some self harboring feelings that they didn't get to live their lives like we are to the fullest. You need to love her enough but love yourself even more to know what is right and what is wrong. You have to cut some ties with her and do what you have to do. I did. I moved out of state, joined the military, got divorced, much more... all against what my parent's thought was 'best' for me. If I lived a life they wanted me to lead I would have been barefoot, with kids cooking meals, and having no education. AGAIN, you have to do what your heart is leading you to do. No matter what anyone tells you you have to live your life with the pro's and cons, possible discouragements, but endless rewards of maturing, wisdom, that help create you and distinguish you from every other follower in society. This helps you to take that next leap of faith and with every obstacle you take on and surpass that makes you so much stronger and helps you to feel liberated and knowing that you make your life, you lead your life, and noone will keep you down. If she wants to scream and throw a tantrum like a child understand what her mentality is, and then calmly tell her that you can see her side but this is a decision you are making and she can either support you, or she can make it hard and just lose her daughter. Throw it back onto her shoulders that she is the one throwing the wrench into works and if she doesn't remove it then she will have to live with her selfishness and misery that you will be hurt that she she won't be able to share in the happiness in your life but you will remember her.
You have to be strong follow your heart and your mind!!!

 

[*Bunny*]

Sometimes it's easier to love someone from a distance.

amen to that ...


heehe

thanks for the cute pic GF ... chin Up & smile ...

 

[Roonytunes]

Wow, T-Cake

Sometimes it's easier to love someone from a distance. Like Curgeo said, it's not your job to fix your mother.

I wish you nothing but luck on the next journey in your life

^^^^^^
Listen to Mermie! She is a wise woman...and I totally concur with her.

I'm late in your log, but just wanted to let you know that I went through a very similar phase with my family. I didn't think we would ever recover, but we now have a semi-decent relationship 8 years later. Ultimately, it's about taking care of YOU and YOUR needs. As long as it feels right in your heart, do what YOU need to do.