Split up with the lady, now a hot blond wants me to spend the night.... advice?

[hardbdygrl]

soooo true val,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,me and my ex lived together for 6 months,,,,,,,,, wich were horrible 6 months,,, he told me he was moving out,,,,,,,,,,,,so i was devistated,,,,,,,but when the time came for him to move out,,,,,,,,,,,, i was fine,,,,,,, i thought i would just be just sitting there crying and begging him not to go,,,,,,,,,buuut it was the total oppisite,,,,,,,,,,,,,, i actually helped his ass move out and into his new place,,,,,, i was actually proud of my self for the way i handled the situatuion one day u will wake up and be over her,,,,,,,,,,,,,, i guess that just was my day to wake up

 

[Big Brother Val]

I wish she could talk to me like you do. I think most of our problems would be solved.

 

[badazzwhitedude]

Keep us posted on it bro'.

 

[Mr.Bo Janlges]

Hey Val, I just found this post.
I Don't think i have anything particularly useful to add, but i thought it might help to know that someone else is in the same situation you are.
I've been with this same girl now for quite some time now, i fell for her like you said "like a blind roofer". I love her with every part of me and treat her as best as i can, buy her flowers, take her out, etc..... She's moved in with me and we've gotten a puppy, i like to think of it as our little family.
But about 3 months ago she started growing distant, slowly at first but then suddenly she basically cut me off. No sex and nothing even close to that. I can handle the no sex part, she says that she's just not into it right now, and its not that she's getting it elsewhere, cause we spend so much time together that it would be pretty much impossible.
Well i know it sounds lame but the worst part is the loss of intimacy, she acts like i'm hardly even there.
Its been like this for over two months now, and i don't know how much more i can handle of it. She says she loves me, but she is'nt treating me right and she thinks i should move on, she claims not to be good enough for me.
I don't know how much longer i can take of this, its pretty painful when each and every day you face rejection from the girl you love.
I don't know if this helped, but all i know is that love is a strange and mysterious beast and that it makes us all do some pretty wierd things.

 

[Big Brother Val]

Mr. Bo Jangles... man... that's rough. I'm sorry to hear it. It's got to be hard to hear her say that you should move on. That's heartbreaking.

My lady never says I should move on, but when I'm so mad that I say I'm going to leave... she doesn't care. I tell her I don't think I'm good enough for her... and she never tries to tell me that I am. Our problem isn't loss of physical contact... it's loss of emotional contact.

I hope it works out for you. But obviously, I have no advice to offer, as I myself don't know how to handle a similar situation. Thanks for the support.

And Badazz... here's the update:

Last night after wrestling I get home, eat, and go to bed. My stuff still wasn't packed. Well... she's wearing something totally tight, sheer, and tiny. I pretended not to notice, and even rolled over on my side, facing away from her. She starts rubbing my back, then reaches around for the chest and arms... next thing I know she's kissin' on my neck and back.

Well... the Offspring song Self Esteem has a line that goes: "I know I should say know, but... it's kinda hard when she's ready to go." And she was all over me. So of course... I went along with it. Not sure if it was the smartest thing... but I love her... and love to do that with her.

So we do. Not one word is said by her. She doesn't say a thing. And I'll be willing to bet that today she acts like nothing ever happened as far as me saying I'm moving out. She'll act like everything is fine. It's like that's her way of making things better... which really doesn't work.

We do that well... we always have. What we don't do is communicate... and that's what I want. I don't know if what happened last night was a good sign, or a bad one.

I keep thinking if I allow her to turn me on like that... and get me to do that, even when I'm upset... it'll keep alive the notion that she can control me. But if I'm not going to be with her that long... I don't want to push her away and say no, because I may not get the chance to be intimate with the lady I love.

I've got a stress headache from hell right now...

 

[badazzwhitedude]

Don't know what to say bro'. It's a very starnge situation. Each time something like this happens to me and it doesn't work out, I always do something else to make myseld feel better. Shortly after it didn't work out me my girl, I started a Test/EQ cycle, which I am currently on. The only thing, is that at first, I seemed to have an enormous amount of rage. I was like a ticking time bomb ready to go off at any time, probably because it exacerbated the sitauation I was already in. I never felt such a strong feeling of rage in my life. And it was virtually all the time. I have calmed down quite a bit now, though.

Something I have planned on doing now, is to move and start my whole life all over again. You can see it in my location below my handle. I have picked San Diego for obvious reasons.

I will be on year 'round when I move there. I will do big cycles with high amounts of Test, EQ, Winny, etc., with incredible ease and for very cheap, as I will be my own source. I will bridge with Anavar and/or Primo between doing heavy cycles. I think I will feel better all the time because of this, no matter what happens. I will be in a much nicer place than where I am at now, as well as in a place where Testosterone virtually grows on trees. So I always make sure that I have other things to do in my life and look forward to. It helps a lot.

It can be a hard at times, but, as you already know, you have to have a life outside of your relationship, and show her you can have a good time w/o her and you have goals that do not involve her. And no matter what happens with you two, good or bad (hopefully good), you will acheive your goals whether she is with you or not.

I am like you in some ways. I usually attract a fair number of girls, and I appear to be pretty tough and I do of have an image, and I am quite proud of myself. And don't get me wrong, I can be pretty tough. But when it comes to my girl, and it is just us, I am a big softie.

 

[Big Brother Val]

I thought about moving. But with my wrestling, and family... I just can't right now.

She does confuse me. Makes me wonder what she's wearing right now while she works. Makes me wonder what she's going to say today, or not say.

The past few days I've been staying at the ring until late, so she's in bed by time I get home. I just wasn't expecting what she did last night.

So I'm mapping out my next cycle. Fina/EQ/Cyp... but if I am out on my own, money will be a huge issue.

We have a show on Saturday, where I get absolutely pummeled with a chair... so that will help.

I do hope everything works out for you, my man. Being my own source, and getting things for ultra cheap would be a really good thing for me right now. It'd help me focus on me, and keep my mind set on bodybuilding... rather than losing my confidence to my gal.

 

[badazzwhitedude]

I have some contacts to get into wrestling locally here, and was offered to be trained by someone who is a very good friend of mine and was a very popular wrestler here. I was gonna go for it, but since I decided to move, obviously it's not going to happen. I love wrestling man. WWF kicks ass and I never miss a single show.

 

[Big Brother Val]

Badazz... wrestling is a lot of fun. But it's a great deal of abuse on the body. I'm supposed to be wrestling in a charity even in November, where some wrestlers from the UPW (a wwf training camp) will be brought in, and we are supposed to wrestle one of their tag teams. Should be fun.

Rriis... I agree. It's odd... I didn't even realize I was losing confidence in myself until it was gone. It just kinda hit me. And what I'm trying to do now, is not only gain back my confidence... but do just what you are saying... stay out. Be gone more. Pay less attention to her. Stop the damn asskissing. As far as seeing other people... I have no real interest in that right now.

But it is hard to stay away too much... I do live with her. As of today anyway. Who knows what tomorrow will bring.

Thanks for the post.

 

[RADAR]

Hello again Val....let me ask you this have you ever considered counciling if you can't get her to go with you then go by yourself but both would be great sometimes a 3 rd party offers enlightment to the situtation and just maybe it will make her realize what she really wants!! Food for thought!!! RADAR