Simpsons Quotes!!

[3Vandoo]

My dream is to own the Dallas Cowboys!

 

[3Vandoo]

call me daddy!

 

[the nature boy]

Kent Brockman "We're about to get our first pictures from inside the Spacecraft with average-naut Homer Simpson. Ahhh! Ladies and Gentlemen we've just lost the picture but what we've seen speaks for itself. The spacecraft has been taken over conquered, if you will, by a master race of space ants. It's hard to see from this vantage point whether the will consume the captive earthmen or merely en-slave them but the ants will soon be here. And I for one welcome our new insect overlords, I would like to remind them that as a trusted tv personality I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in there underground sugar caves"



Principal Skinner - "You may find his accent peculiar. Certain aspects of his culture may seem absurd, perhaps even offensive. But I urge you all to give little Adil the benefit of the doubt. In this way, and only in this way, can we hope to better understand our backward neighbours throughout the world."


Loinel Huttz:
Hutz: Yeah! That's why you're the Judge and I'm the.... law talking guy.
Judge: The Lawyer!
Hutz: Right.


Chief Wiggum - “Okay,folks, show’s over. Nothing to see here, show’s … Oh my god! A horribleplane crash! Hey, everybody, get a load of this flaming wreckage! Come on, crowd around, crowd around! Don’t be shy, crowd around!”

 

[Lao Tzu]

The sequence where homer tries to buy a gun is funny.


Gun Shop Owner: Well, you'll probably want the accessory kit. Holster...
Homer: Oh, yeah.
Gun Shop Owner: Bandoleer.
Homer: Baby.
Gun Shop Owner: Silencer.
Homer: Mmm-hmm.
Gun Shop Owner: Loudener.
Homer: [drooling noise]
Gun Shop Owner: Speed-cocker.
Homer: Ooh, I like the sound of that.
Gun Shop Owner: And this is for shooting down police helicopters.
Homer: Oh, I don't need anything like that... [paranoid]...yet. Just give me my gun. [grabs for gun]
Gun Shop Owner: Sorry, the law requires a five-day waiting period. We've got to run a background check.
Homer: Five days? But I'm mad now!
Homer: I'd kill you if I had my gun!
Gun Shop Owner: Yeah, well, you don't.
Homer: [walking out of store to his car] Lousy big shot, thinks
he's so big 'cause he's got a lot of guns, if he didn't
have any guns I'd show him a thing or two...[at home,
pacing the hallway in front of Lisa's bedroom]...let's see
him walk into my store and then we'll see who's worried about five-day waiting periods...
Lisa: Dad...it's three A.M! Can't you mutter in your room?
Homer: Marge kicked me out.
Lisa: [groans] All right. Go ahead.
Homer: Pushy kids think they can tell me what to do in my house, Why, I tell you these parents these days they don't know how to rear children...

 

[The Whole F/N Show]

"I'm normally not a praying man but if you're up there please, save me Superman." - Homer

"Leave a message after the beep but don't be a message monster hogging all my tape!" - Rainier Wolfcastle

"Why should these people be allowed to win mearly because fof the gifts God gave them? I say cheating is the gift man gives himself." - Mr. Burns

 

[str8cubano]

DUFFMAN:


Homer is on hunger strike, and Duff man see's the coruptivness of the isotopes manager, and doens't know wehter to listen to The isotopes guy or homer, then Duffman sais:

"Duffman.....Confused....what ...would Jesus DO?"

Then Duffman bodyslams the guy fromt he istopoes....whatever i can't say it right on the computer doens't sound funny...


HOmer:

"Beer, the cause, and solution too...all of life's problems:


Martin:

Hi Supernintendo Chalmers

 

[KING]

when Lisa and Bart try to escape and Homer traps them in and exclaims (in a hick's voice)

" get'em ma "

 

[smallmovesal]

DUFFMAN:


Martin:

Hi Supernintendo Chalmers

ok i'm a geek... i was pretty sure that was a ralphism. i love ralph

 

[sigweed]

at the autoshow:
Lisa: Hey wait a second, that's not a dummy!
German salesman: [yanks curtains shut] zis exzibit iz closed!

 

[TC2]

Ralph: "My cat's breath smells like cat food"