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should i stop my run, going through a break up

alltraps

alltraps

New member
to make a long story short, i just broke up, not my choice, with the girl i thought i was going to marry. the reason for the breakup doesnt matter cuz she doesnt think we can work it out. im fucked, i cant sleep, eat or train. its been a week, and i feel worse today then i did the first night. i miss her like mad, and keep thinking there is hope. but she doesnt think so. we had problems that she doesnt think we can overcome, and its easier to run from them then face them. i would do anything to make it work, but im affraid its not up to me at all. so ive lost 12 lbs in a week from not eating. i missed some shots and havent been taking my arals like i should, im a mess. and probably need proffesional help. im in week 6 of 16. should i stop alltogether?
im not sure when i;ll feel better and focused to eat and train. i dont think it will be anytime soon. i never loved anyone before, so i dont know how long this healing process takes. some tell me months, some years. what do yuo guys think? i dont want to take shit and not use it. i just lost all motivation to train and eat. its like bodybuilding doesnt matter anymore. all that matters is her.
 
12 lbs in a fucking week!!?!
All that hard work down the shitter!?!
All the money for the gear wasted...
 
you;re right but the matters to tend to, i have no control over. so there is nothing i can do. i just wonder how long before im ok and myself again. thats what scares me. what if it takes months? what then? i dont train all that time and shrink to nothing? what if i never want to train again period? all these paranoid thoughts are in my head. i just cant imagine life without this girl. she really was the one for me. i feel so lost. i know i sound pothetic, but love did some shit to me that i thought was not possible
 
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What he said! PM if you need anything or just wanna chat,Take care of YOURSELF or have your friends make you feel better

cobra1414 said:
I would stop and run pct.

Get your life back on track and when you're ready to juice again, the gear will always be waiting for you.

Sounds like you've definitely got more important matters to tend to right now.

Good luck!
Click to expand...
 
just be strong bro..id hang in there..im going through the same crap now, been dating this girl for 4 years and we are going through a break up..we have been on and off for months now and i dont think its ever going to workout.. working out training, eating right and keeping my mind of my job is what makes me stronger, especially when u are use to someone living with you. but just keep focused on your goals in life and dont let a woman ruin it for you. even though im sure u love her. sorry to hear that bro, i know how u must feel
 
I know how it feels bro, ive been "there".. i really hope it works out for you.. put AAS and bodybuilding aside for a time, that would be my choice.. as long,all i can do is to give you some karma, here you go
 
thanks for the replies. i still dont know what to do. i just want to be better NOW. i try to workout, but i have no strenght or anything. i just sit there looking in the mirror. everyone at the gym knows there is something wrong with me. i dont tell them, but they know. i guess i just look pothetic.
 
Ulcasterdropout said:
12 lbs in a fucking week!!?!
All that hard work down the shitter!?!
All the money for the gear wasted...
Click to expand...

i know, i shrank. i was 266,and dropped to 254 so fast, i could feel it, i was scared to step on a scale. this was, up to this point, one of my best and most focused runs ever. iwas gonna hit 275. not anymore
 
Hard to say what you should do. On one hand, you're certainly not going to make much in the way of gains with the suppressed appetite...but on the other hand, maybe the AAS are saving you from losing some lean mass (negative nitrogen balance from not eating plus the elevated cortisol levels that come from extreme stress). If you can force yourself to at least drink a lot of whey (buy a couple of cases cans and bottles...I know right now you probably have a hard time motivating yourself to even use the blender to mix up powders) and can force yourself to go to the gym, I think it might be worth it to stay on til' the natrual end of your cycle. After all, you're already depressed....adding Clomid to that mix might be a disaster.
 
alltraps said:
you;re right but the matters to tend to, i have no control over. so there is nothing i can do. i just wonder how long before im ok and myself again. thats what scares me. what if it takes months? what then? i dont train all that time and shrink to nothing? what if i never want to train again period? all these paranoid thoughts are in my head. i just cant imagine life without this girl. she really was the one for me. i feel so lost. i know i sound pothetic, but love did some shit to me that i thought was not possible
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Dont worry bro, it get's better. Take it from a now old married guy, I lost a few, and most were actually my fault, hurt like hell, but a couple of weeks later I was getting horny again. take it easy, take your pct, you'll be back training in no time.
 
canadianhitman said:
Hard to say what you should do. On one hand, you're certainly not going to make much in the way of gains with the suppressed appetite...but on the other hand, maybe the AAS are saving you from losing some lean mass (negative nitrogen balance from not eating plus the elevated cortisol levels that come from extreme stress). If you can force yourself to at least drink a lot of whey (buy a couple of cases cans and bottles...I know right now you probably have a hard time motivating yourself to even use the blender to mix up powders) and can force yourself to go to the gym, I think it might be worth it to stay on til' the natrual end of your cycle. After all, you're already depressed....adding Clomid to that mix might be a disaster.
Click to expand...

this was my whole concern with coming off now. and yes, even mixing shakes seem like a struggle. thanks for the help. you gave me advice on my similar thread on the chat forum. thanks again
 
alltraps said:
to make a long story short, i just broke up, not my choice, with the girl i thought i was going to marry. the reason for the breakup doesnt matter cuz she doesnt think we can work it out. im fucked, i cant sleep, eat or train. its been a week, and i feel worse today then i did the first night. i miss her like mad, and keep thinking there is hope. but she doesnt think so. we had problems that she doesnt think we can overcome, and its easier to run from them then face them. i would do anything to make it work, but im affraid its not up to me at all. so ive lost 12 lbs in a week from not eating. i missed some shots and havent been taking my arals like i should, im a mess. and probably need proffesional help. im in week 6 of 16. should i stop alltogether?
im not sure when i;ll feel better and focused to eat and train. i dont think it will be anytime soon. i never loved anyone before, so i dont know how long this healing process takes. some tell me months, some years. what do yuo guys think? i dont want to take shit and not use it. i just lost all motivation to train and eat. its like bodybuilding doesnt matter anymore. all that matters is her.
Click to expand...

I say stop the cycle completely and do PCT, but don't run clomid (it makes a lot of ppl. emotional) - run some nolvadex and arimidex (low dose) for PCT.

I hope everything works out for you, just make sure you're doing the right thing and god bless.

Mr.X
 
Bro i cant say i know enough about gear to give you any advice on weather to stop or not.

But ive been through the same thing before, and i can tell you when your feeling like shit the worst thing you can do is nothing. If you do nothing youll be living in side your head. Which is probably a pretty shitty place to be right now. If you keep thinking about it and keep trying to think your way out of feeling bad, you might end up feeling worse. Your best bet is to focus hard on everything else that isnt the problem. Work, school, working out, friends. And when you start thinking about how bad it seems, think about something else.
 
I would probably go down to an HRT dose of test and maybe some proviron or even igf-1.
 
Good call on the no PCT!

Mr.X said:
I say stop the cycle completely and do PCT, but don't run clomid (it makes a lot of ppl. emotional) - run some nolvadex and arimidex (low dose) for PCT.

I hope everything works out for you, just make sure you're doing the right thing and god bless.

Mr.X
Click to expand...
 
it has only been a week. life goes on all traps. if it doesn't kill you, it'll make you stronger. one door closes, another one opens. and so on, and so on, and so on. part of growing up...

hell ya finish the cycle! concentrate on what you love during this tough time. it'll take your mind off things. HER loss! (the bitch)
 
I say you continue and finish strong man!! Take some aggression out on the weights, you need something to get your mind off of her I think working out is the best thing to take your mind off a girl. I'm sorry for your lose, I had the same thing happen to me a few months back I couldn't eat or sleep all I thought about was her so I hit the weights harder and now I'm much more happy and looking back i couldn't believe how stupid I was for caring so much because life goes on and the single life is fun!!!!!!!!!


I don't mean to come off as an asshole but i've been through it and you need to just get over her and find someone else. If she don't want you don't beg find yourself someone else.
 
No phucking way!!!! Get a hold of yourself. You go put your schedule of shots together. Write out a new training split, get in the gym and quit whinning on the board. You will be over this mania in 2 weeks. You can certainly get to the other side of 2 weeks can't you? The whole mess will work itself out one way or the other so just put your head down and plough forward. Nothing feels better than being on and nothing is more depressing than coming off. SO YOU STAY ON. I ain't playin with you, get back on schedule. RIGHT NOW! Go get a syringe out and get to work. And don't bring your sorry ass back here until you do.
 
Same thing happened to me bro, with a girl i thought i was going to marry that i loved with all my heart. Nothing mattered to me at that point, i WANTED to train but every time i got in gym i just loooked at all the people and thought "what the fuc* are they doing here " this is pointless bunch of bs" . Well i was on a cycle at the time and decided to stay on. I didnt work out for a while. Then once i regained my composure ( to a degree) i came off when i was more emotionally stable. I WOULD NEVER COME OF ANY CYCLE IN THIS POSSITION EVER!...knowing how bad this hurt me i might of done something i could nto regret at this time, or who knows what. I wont lie to you bro, if you realy realy love her its gona be fucked up for a while, but it will get all GOOD BROTHA :) So take some 1st hand advice, relax, eat some good food, take some needed time off , stay on(i would just stay on 500 -750 or so mgs of test), and when all is cool get back in there swinging. Bro you are now in the 1st stage and i am now in the last stage(im back on coming back hard from the bitch who ruined a full year of progress for me) i will get biger than i ever have been and cutter than i ever have been. And you mark my words will be back here in a while writing that you are now getting bigge rthan ever and everything is good and laughing about this day!
 
Pierdol suke, polka czy amerykanka z ciekawosci? Pewnie Polka
 
I went thru a similiar situation recently. Working out got me thru it...otherwise I would sit on the computer all day thinking about her. I feel for you, brother, but you need a diversion....better you choose the gym than the bottle.
 
alltraps said:
to make a long story short, i just broke up, not my choice, with the girl i thought i was going to marry. the reason for the breakup doesnt matter cuz she doesnt think we can work it out. im fucked, i cant sleep, eat or train. its been a week, and i feel worse today then i did the first night. i miss her like mad, and keep thinking there is hope. but she doesnt think so. we had problems that she doesnt think we can overcome, and its easier to run from them then face them. i would do anything to make it work, but im affraid its not up to me at all. so ive lost 12 lbs in a week from not eating. i missed some shots and havent been taking my arals like i should, im a mess. and probably need proffesional help. im in week 6 of 16. should i stop alltogether?
im not sure when i;ll feel better and focused to eat and train. i dont think it will be anytime soon. i never loved anyone before, so i dont know how long this healing process takes. some tell me months, some years. what do yuo guys think? i dont want to take shit and not use it. i just lost all motivation to train and eat. its like bodybuilding doesnt matter anymore. all that matters is her.
Click to expand...

Let her be for awhile, let her miss you alittle. If she doesn't think it will work then let her be. If you have given it your best then there is nothing you can do to change her mind. Girls come and go. I have had two girls that I thought I would be set with, but you know what they didn't work out. I learned alot after my first fucked up relationship. I have been through some Messed up relationships too but hey thats life. I am with a different girl now that has been the best to me. Anyhow don't stop your life. I say tomorrow is a new day. New Beginning. Get back into the gym focus on you. I know its easier said then done. But you can't keep beating on a dead dog. Be strong. Good Luck. Hope things work out for you.
 
Muwilem do alltraps Ulter, domyslilem ssie ze muwi po polsku bo flage ma polska
 
i would stop the cycle and run the pct without the clomid. clomid makes me want to commit suicide half the time. nothing you need right now. i got divorced one year ago and refocusing myself on powerlifting was what helped me persevere through the emotional breakdowns. and as far as when you will be over her, only time will tell. i miss the woman i married every day. but i have someone i dearly love now and who loves and treats me with respect. i wouldn't trade that for anything. you may never be completely over her, but it does get easier with time. nobody says you have to ever get over her. but you can't let this situation ruin your life. take a week or two off and run the pct. when you feel the fire burning inside of you, you'll know you are ready to get back to your iron lifestyle

take time and reflect on the good times you two shared together, if it was meant to be, maybe she'll come around later. but remember you must give her a reason for her to want to come back. why would anyone want to be around a depressed/unmotivated loser? regain your confidence in life and in yourself. make yourself desirable to her and other people as well. this is also good for yourself as it will aid your recovery from this depression and make you regain your confidence in yourself much faster. there's much more you can do bro, and i wish you luck. nobody deserves to have their heart broke. if you need to talk, drop me a pm. i've did alot of research in this area. it's tough but you have to be tougher. stay strong brother
 
"Devastation" deserves some serious K for that post. VERY strong advice bro.

-e
 
I really feel for you alltraps. The exact same thing happened to me 3 months ago. My girlfriend and I had been together for years and talked about marriage. This is the woman I planned on getting old and having my kids with! It's been the most painful experience of my entire life and am afraid to get attached to someone now because of it. I really do understand what you're going through and I will be more than happy to talk to you via PM's about this. You shouldn't keep it bottled up, you have to let it out sometime and to just one person makes a difference. Been there - done that.

Now as far as my advice to you. Make some changes. Get your hair cut differently, get your teeth whitened, get a tan. Just make some changes to your body. It'll make you feel a little bit better. Get proud of yourself! Dress in some nicer clothes and go to a nice restaurant with a good friend. Don't hide in your room and shrink. Get someone to workout with you. They'll keep you motivated and on track! Start planning things and occupy your time!!!!! DON'T SIT AROUND! Make something of yourself!

I only tell you this because I've been through it. This is what made a difference for me. It's only been 3 months and I'm doing alot better. It will take time. I'm dating around some and with time you should do the same. Get in the gym and make a new you. Hold your head up and stay proud. You've been there to help me in my threads so I'm returning the favor. PM me if you like. Take it easy.

Chris
 
Ulter said:
No phucking way!!!! Get a hold of yourself. You go put your schedule of shots together. Write out a new training split, get in the gym and quit whinning on the board. You will be over this mania in 2 weeks. You can certainly get to the other side of 2 weeks can't you? The whole mess will work itself out one way or the other so just put your head down and plough forward. Nothing feels better than being on and nothing is more depressing than coming off. SO YOU STAY ON. I ain't playin with you, get back on schedule. RIGHT NOW! Go get a syringe out and get to work. And don't bring your sorry ass back here until you do.
Click to expand...

LOL...this is why I check the boards at midnight when ive got nothing else to do. Funny shit ulter!
 
PolfaJelfa said:
Muwilem do alltraps Ulter, domyslilem ssie ze muwi po polsku bo flage ma polska
Click to expand...

nie polka, canadyjka. korwa popierdolona.

im still undecided on what i am giong to do. i dontwant to shrink, which is what i am doing and im on a lot of shit, icant imagine what would happen if i stopped completely. but for some reason, size and training doesnt matter to me right now. she matters, and thats all i cant think of. i try to block her out, think of other interests like my car, training, poker etc, but it all somehow loops back to her. she was such a big part of my life that everything i did, she was involved in. when i go to the gym, im scared shitless to see her there, as she trains there too. i know she went there once this week, and saw my car in the parking lot, she didnt go in. she said she saw me walking out and started to cry her eyes out. the thing that keeps me fucked is that i have hope, she gives me hope. she knows im the one, and wants to work things out, but a part of her sais we cant get past what happened, no matter what we do. i just feel like thats her runing away, while i was willing to do anything. i know its not the end of the world, and things like the tsunami disaster make me feel like a fucking retard for being like this. but its my life here, and it feels like its taken away from me. i make no sence here, but im really depressed about this, i wish i could just take a magical pill to get over this, to be strong, and confident and secure and rational. somone please invent one. i will pay millions just for one dose.
 
Your first love is always the hardest one to get over but believe me you will. You need to distract yourself right now. Be around friends if you can go on vacation or just do some new or different things... Do whatever it takes to get your mind off of her for even a moment. Once you are able to do this for a few seconds the next time will be a minute etc.. and it will just get better. I know it feels like your life is over but IT ISN'T.. Whatever happened to break you guys up happened for a reason now it is time to move on. My first love I really never got over.... So no one can really give you a time limit.... I know in my situation that I will always have a love for him I just know we are not meant to be together.... NOW turn that frown upside down and go do something to distract yourself!!!
 
i feel for you bro, what you are going thru is one of the most miserable experiences a human being can have. i bet that 90% of the people here have had a similar experience, and i'm not trying to minimize what's happening to you. i'm jus putting it in perspective that the fact is it happens to anyone who extends his/herself to another person by developing those kind of emotions. jus hang in there, time is on your side.
 
khemix said:
I really feel for you alltraps. The exact same thing happened to me 3 months ago. My girlfriend and I had been together for years and talked about marriage. This is the woman I planned on getting old and having my kids with! It's been the most painful experience of my entire life and am afraid to get attached to someone now because of it. I really do understand what you're going through and I will be more than happy to talk to you via PM's about this. You shouldn't keep it bottled up, you have to let it out sometime and to just one person makes a difference. Been there - done that.

Now as far as my advice to you. Make some changes. Get your hair cut differently, get your teeth whitened, get a tan. Just make some changes to your body. It'll make you feel a little bit better. Get proud of yourself! Dress in some nicer clothes and go to a nice restaurant with a good friend. Don't hide in your room and shrink. Get someone to workout with you. They'll keep you motivated and on track! Start planning things and occupy your time!!!!! DON'T SIT AROUND! Make something of yourself!

I only tell you this because I've been through it. This is what made a difference for me. It's only been 3 months and I'm doing alot better. It will take time. I'm dating around some and with time you should do the same. Get in the gym and make a new you. Hold your head up and stay proud. You've been there to help me in my threads so I'm returning the favor. PM me if you like. Take it easy.

Chris
Click to expand...

Great advice. I've been through it too and was PCT (on clomid) at the time, that was a real fucker but as khemix states don't sit around thinking it over and over, get out and look after yourself. Make some changes and move on to the next chapter.

There's some real solid supportive bro's on here, it's good to see that. If you'd like to send me a PM to talk things over feel free - this sort of things happens to the best of us. Head-up mate :)
 
Dude, We all went through it. Its tuff but it all works out. One day you will meet the right one. Other people can't make you happy, only you can make yourself happy. Focus on your goals. Take some time, get some direction, and get back at it.
Good luck bro.
 
Fuck dood .. I know where you are coming from. Its freakin true what they say bro. Girls fall faster ... but guys fall harder!

If there is one thing I can teach you bro ... its that life is truely nothing more than a series of ups and downs! Thats it. One minute you are up, next you are down. The series just repeats throughout life bro. I went through what you are going through now about 3 yrs ago. It was my first girl, we were together about 3.5 years, and it ended. It was the most devasting thing to ever happen to me, and I never thought that I would get over it. Finally a year later I started to get over it ..then I lost my sister to a drunk driver. Completely devasted again, just after I started to get my life back on track. When I started to come around, I found more problems with work and my health, and then girls again. What I am trying to get at .. is that you are more than likely going to run into the kind of heartache again bro sometime in your life. The first time it happens is the worst, but you get better at dealing with things, and learn from it each time.

Now with your girl .. you two are freshly broken up! You have to find out if you are REALLY done for good or not. My mistake was I kept trying to patch things up for about a year it dragged on .. till I finally realised that I was more miserable when I was with her, becasue things were never the same agian. Its just a big graph bro. You are at the bottom right now, but it will rise again. Once you know that its done .. my advice is .. you must REALIZE this ... and move on ASAP.

Its hard as fuck bro, I know, but you have to look at the shit you DO HAVE. Family, friends, health. One thing that happened to me, is that I realised a lot of things that I STOPPED doing because of my girl. I stopped going snowboarding with my friends and mountain biking, and stuff like that .. and I started to get back into it. Hang out with some good friends to keep your mind off it. Blow off some steam however you need to. I was a mess, I ended up getting pretty wasted many of nights, which didnt really help my situation, but it felt theraputic to me at the same time, lol. Spend some time with your family bro. Take them out for a nice brunch somewhere or something. You will really start to appreciate them more in times like this.

Now as far your timing goes. It seems that you are caught with your pants down, being mid-cycle and all. If you do come off, you can experience a very shitty crash, (which could be 10 fold given the state that you are in). You have to realise this if you plan to come off. I would tend to agree with people here, in that coming off could be a bad idea right now.

Remember this .. "Confidence is the key to success". That goes for everything in life. From work, to girls, to wealth, you name it. YOu just have to get a grip on the big picture here. Realise that she is more than likely going through the same hell you are right now. I was a piece of shit for a long time, then I turned it around as others suggested. Started hitting the gym HARD. Probably the best in my life! I did a complete 360. Started eating great, resting, started looking and feeling good. Started to get some of my confidence back. Spent lots of time with my family and friends. Even spent some time with my grandfather and people like that who I normally dont spend time with. You will come around bro, I have no doubt about that. Its just a matter of when you decide to get your shit together, and get on with life. You can drag this on for years if you want. But one thing I have learned is that ... the sooner you realise things are done ... the sooner you can move on.

Something that you probalby dont want to here is this ... YOur first girl that you really love, is a hard one to forget. I admitt... I still think about mine, and we still talk, and I still have feelings for her. But not in that sense. I would never go back to her. Its just that she was such a big part of my life at one time, its hard to just forget that. I have been through many girls since that, and have found another amazing one now. Dont worry bro. And dont think what a lot of folks think... "I am too old to be single again". Not the case at all bro. Have fun with it. You will start meeting some really cool people. But like I say .. you have to realise this, and start getting over things first. Some people can do this faster than others. Good luck to ya bro, and do what ya gotta do to get through this. Go over to Needsize's house and beat on him for a while. Might blow some steam off for ya! lol. I agree what was mentioned earlier that the worse thing that you can do is live inside your head bro. Your thoughts will be the end of you. I am my own worst enemey in this sense. Get out and do some things bro and have some fun.

Good luck,
Mavy
 
mavy, i do realize that its over. but its so fucking hard to swallow. i strongly believe that we could have worked this all out, but she chose to run away, as its easier then building it back up. this hurts, cuz this is the same girl that told me she would move to the moon with me, if i wanted to. she would die for. now, she wont even fight for what we had. and i am having a hard time accepting that. i was willing to DO anything to help her, and help me, but she just wants to run and uses her age as an excuse for EVERYTHING. im sick of the excuses. i had some closure on friday when she told me that she finaly realized why we had to end it, because up to then, it was just that she was 21 and wasnt sure about her life. she admited that she couldnt face me everyday knowing what she had and couldnt live with herself knowing how much she hurt me. i was hurt, and needed her, and she couldnt give me love cuz she didnt love herself. i wanted to help, but she just wants to run. today, this morning she wrote me an email with a poem, again going back to the excuse that is 21 and confused. so i give up. shes just using every excuse she can think of. i know she went out last night,and the poem had really poor grammer and spelling, and she is not like that, so i think she was drunk or something. she would never ever be drunk till 8 in the morning, but i guess that changed. what kills me is that it hasnt even been a week and shes already out getting drunk and stupid. i feel like i meant nothing to her and she doesnt respect me at all. maybe next peom she;ll send me will be about the new guy is in love with. im waiting for a week for that one. FUCK im pothetic
 
Going out and getting drunk could be her way of coping.

You gotta PM me and let me know the hell happened between you two. This is driving me nuts. Just know that your bros on he internet are thinking about you in real life.
 
stab her with a hiv infected needle and then force her family members to bit a piece off of her....i find serenity in torture
 
21 is too young to be married alltraps. she is still a little girl. you probably would have split up anyhow. consider it a blessing in disguise.
 
hikneeken said:
stab her with a hiv infected needle and then force her family members to bit a piece off of her....i find serenity in torture
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Go away. :chomp:
 
i didnt want to marry her right away, but we knew once she finished shcool, we were going to. it was so clear. everyone that knew us, knew how perfect we were for each other. but when we had problems, she ran, and now shes running again. and i cant understand why she would. after all we had.
 
Quit thinking she's the only one for you. If she was, it wouldn't be so difficult. There is no one magic person, destined to make you happy. I used to be fucked in the head like that. It's psychological and you probably should get help if you are that bad. I just got a self-help book which was enough to open my eyes. People who, as children, lose a parent or have a parent who is unavailable (alcoholic/divorced, whatever) are always trying to reconnect to that one special person (the bliss they experienced sucking their mommie's tittie) who, in reality, doesn't exist. Then they overwhelm every new lover with these obsessive desires to reconnect to what they didn't get as children. Any little slight, they perceive as rejection until their overwhelming fear of rejection becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy. They push the person away. Even when things are going great they will unconsciously start a fight with their lover because they are fixated with the struggle rather than their actual goal of finding that one perfect person (which does not exist).
Trust me, I've seen it in my cousins. One has a wife who he left twice and divorced for cheating on him twice (that he knows of). But he keeps going back with her. Why? Because he can't live with the rejection and must prove to himself that he is worthy of her. He can get a lot of girls too. His brother wants nothing to do with the girlfriend and newborn baby waiting at home for him, instead he'd rather sit in a corner bar and try to pick up some other girl. What decent girl will want that kind of baggage? But, you see, they will never be happy because they are programmed psychologically (as a result of their upbringing) not to be.
If you want the name of the self-help book, PM me.
 
bbkingpinn said:
Quit thinking she's the only one for you. If she was, it wouldn't be so difficult. There is no one magic person, destined to make you happy. I used to be fucked in the head like that. It's psychological and you probably should get help if you are that bad. I just got a self-help book which was enough to open my eyes. People who, as children, lose a parent or have a parent who is unavailable (alcoholic/divorced, whatever) are always trying to reconnect to that one special person (the bliss they experienced sucking their mommie's tittie) who, in reality, doesn't exist. Then they overwhelm every new lover with these obsessive desires to reconnect to what they didn't get as children. Any little slight, they perceive as rejection until their overwhelming fear of rejection becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy. They push the person away. Even when things are going great they will unconsciously start a fight with their lover because they are fixated with the struggle rather than their actual goal of finding that one perfect person (which does not exist).
Trust me, I've seen it in my cousins. One has a wife who he left twice and divorced for cheating on him twice (that he knows of). But he keeps going back with her. Why? Because he can't live with the rejection and must prove to himself that he is worthy of her. He can get a lot of girls too. His brother wants nothing to do with the girlfriend and newborn baby waiting at home for him, instead he'd rather sit in a corner bar and try to pick up some other girl. What decent girl will want that kind of baggage? But, you see, they will never be happy because they are programmed psychologically (as a result of their upbringing) not to be.
If you want the name of the self-help book, PM me.
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i swear to GOD, this makes sence to me. her family hasnt been there for her at all. in fact , most of the issues she has been talking to me for the last two years have been how fucked up her family is. wow, i am in disbelief how much this makes sence. she was so up and down all the time, one minute bugging me to piick out baby names and talking about where we;re going to get married, to the next minute saying she is so not content with her life and needs braces and go back to school, even though she is beautiful, and already finished shcool and has a fucking career. she just wants to run to fullfill some magical thing tahts she thinks is missing from her life. knowing this, still doesnt help the pain and hurt. i wanted to help her so much, i feel like she really needs me, but pushed me away. often she told me i was the only good and secure thing in her life, and she even though she isnt sure about anything, shes sure about me. but im the only thing she ever pushed away when things didnt go her way or she was depressed. i dont understand why anyone would do that.
 
alltraps said:
i swear to GOD, this makes sence to me. her family hasnt been there for her at all. in fact , most of the issues she has been talking to me for the last two years have been how fucked up her family is. wow, i am in disbelief how much this makes sence. she was so up and down all the time, one minute bugging me to piick out baby names and talking about where we;re going to get married, to the next minute saying she is so not content with her life and needs braces and go back to school, even though she is beautiful, and already finished shcool and has a fucking career. she just wants to run to fullfill some magical thing tahts she thinks is missing from her life. knowing this, still doesnt help the pain and hurt. i wanted to help her so much, i feel like she really needs me, but pushed me away. often she told me i was the only good and secure thing in her life, and she even though she isnt sure about anything, shes sure about me. but im the only thing she ever pushed away when things didnt go her way or she was depressed. i dont understand why anyone would do that.
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You need to take a look at yourself, bro. You're the one who seems to be hurting the most. Why can't YOU walk away? She is no doubt f--k'd up in the head. But you seem to be bearing the brunt of it. You're letting her fuck you up in the head and, believe me, even if you accept it's over, she may keep coming back and you may keep taking her back because you think you can make it work -- that she the one for you -- the only one for you. I'm going to PM you the name of the book, bro. The book made me a much stronger person -- ("Know thyself!" Plato/Socrates "He who conquers others is strong; he who conquers himself is mighty!" Sun Tzu) Rejection is painful but much more painful for others that REFUSE to accept it. That's why I included the example of my divorced cousin.
 
bbkingpinn said:
You need to take a look at yourself, bro. You're the one who seems to be hurting the most. Why can't YOU walk away? She is no doubt f--k'd up in the head. But you seem to be bearing the brunt of it. You're letting her fuck you up in the head and, believe me, even if you accept it's over, she may keep coming back and you may keep taking her back because you think you can make it work -- that she the one for you -- the only one for you. I'm going to PM you the name of the book, bro. The book made me a much stronger person -- ("Know thyself!" Plato/Socrates "He who conquers others is strong; he who conquers himself is mighty!" Sun Tzu) Rejection is painful but much more painful for others that REFUSE to accept it. That's why I included the example of my divorced cousin.
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again, you're righ about everything you say. i give her power over me, i accept her calls and reply to emails. i dont have the courage to walk away in fear of completely losing her. its pothetic and desperate but thats what i am right now. i cant be mad at her, or hate her. i know she didnt do anything on purpose to hurt me, shes just fucked up about life. thats why its hard for me to hate her. she simply doesnt know what she wants, and if she does want this, she doesnt know what to do to make it better. and it is ALL up to her to make this better. she just choses the easy way out, cuz then she doesnt have to deal with seeing the pain in my eyes. meanwhile, i want to be there for her and help her with everything. i always told her, no matter how hard life will be, take confort in knowing i am always going to be there to help
 
You are trying to be her savior. There's a chapter in the book about that. I PM'd you the details so I hope you get the book -- don't order online if possible but call the local Border's or whatever and see if they carry it. You don't need to be waiting for the mail for the book while at the same time trying to deal with all the shit this girl is putting you through.
 
Just a little view from the estrogen side of the table, with some maturity associated with it. This is a blanket statement and I know there are exceptions (cuz I've seen some amazing ones on this board!), but from my observations and my own experiences during that time of my life, women below 25, and often up to 30 just are not sure of what they want. They waffle between relying on someone all the time or having a boyfriend all the time, partying, going on whatever peer pressure says they should do, etc, and taking stabs at be independent. To be honest I can't even explain why, but I think particularly women experience confusion on what exactly society expects of them and what they should expect from society. If they come from screwy family backgrounds, its even worse.

You are young and so is she - you don't need to get married right now so don't feel the pressure to do it. Maybe she needs to work out her demons on her own and only time will help her deal w/ it. Who knows. But like my dad says, 'pay attention to what YOU are doing". I know it is hella hard to focus when your emotions are shot. I didn't catch what you are cycling, but I'd also pay attention to what you are cycling if you continue with the cycle - I know a few good men who have turned into assholes on tren and didn't realize it until after the fact. But I also think that if you stop the cycle you'll get the hormone swings that you really don't need right now.

I think bbkingpin hit it pretty good above.

Good luck to ya!
 
sassy has given the best explaination....this is not the first time ive heard this from adults over 30......

its funny cause thats how i was when i was a teenager.....drugs..all that shit......now i just want peace, steroids, food, gym, a good, patient women....

hang in there traps
 
im hanging, thats the problem. if she actualy told me that is completely over, it would be much easier but she has not done so. she sais shes not sure she can handle the pressure of making things right. so i have hope. i wish i could just say fuck it and go without blinking an eye, but thats just not me. i believe you have to fight for something if you want it bad enough, but shes not fighting, so i look like a desperate fool. i know i sound like a broken record, but i am just that, broken. i do need to be strong and not feel like i need her to live. i have been single more then i have been in relationships, BY CHOICE, so once i get over this down, i;ll be ok. i just dont know when that will happen, and i dont want to waste my time and health waiting for the inevidable
 
you know, you have a decision in this also, don't let someone rule over you like that, it makes you a servant, not a bf.
 
HumanTarget said:
you know, you have a decision in this also, don't let someone rule over you like that, it makes you a servant, not a bf.
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i know, by emailing her and calling her, and going to her house when she asks me to, gives her all power over me. she knows that when she feels insecure she can call me and i will always be there for her, cuz i have been. i dont think its intentional on her part, but makes her feel good about herself, and makes me feel worse.
 
alltraps said:
im hanging, thats the problem. if she actualy told me that is completely over, it would be much easier but she has not done so. she sais shes not sure she can handle the pressure of making things right. so i have hope. i wish i could just say fuck it and go without blinking an eye, but thats just not me. i believe you have to fight for something if you want it bad enough, but shes not fighting, so i look like a desperate fool. i know i sound like a broken record, but i am just that, broken. i do need to be strong and not feel like i need her to live. i have been single more then i have been in relationships, BY CHOICE, so once i get over this down, i;ll be ok. i just dont know when that will happen, and i dont want to waste my time and health waiting for the inevidable
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i know this is easier said then done bro....but dont crawl back to her...tell her that you're ok with it being over...act like its not that big of a deal....i garentee you'll get her response quicker....you'll find out if she really cares.....and i garentee she does....its hard bt it works bro.....

sometimes women(and men) just dont realize what they had untill it waaayyy too late....
 
Whatever you do, DO NOT take clomid. If you feel bad now you'll fell worse on that shit.

It's your choice whether you stay on or off but my advice would be get a hold of yourself and give yourself a shake, a big shake. Then get back in that gym, put the headphones on and play some hard fast music and get your workout done like a man. Like I said though, only you can choose to do that bro. You can though, it's all in the mind. Do it.

Girls don't like you running to them anyway bro, get on with your life and whats to be will be.

Good luck

UglyASS
 
If you stop the cycle atleast continue hitting the gym. Ive been through the same thing and if I stayed in the gym working out instead of stopping I would have felt so much better.
 
alltraps said:
i know, by emailing her and calling her, and going to her house when she asks me to, gives her all power over me. she knows that when she feels insecure she can call me and i will always be there for her, cuz i have been. i dont think its intentional on her part, but makes her feel good about herself, and makes me feel worse.
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Bro, a short lesson is that you are obsessing about her which is in your mind. Since you cannot control the obsessive thoughts, you have to take control of your actions. NO PHONE CALLS, NO E-MAILS, NO GOING TO HER HOUSE. You can control your actions. It's a vicious cycle, your actions feed your obsessive thoughts so by stopping the only thing you can control right now -- your actions -- you can break the cycle. Put a sticky note on your phone, on your PC, on the steering wheel of your car. STOP. No phone calls, no emails, no trips.

Call a friend, go to Hooters, have a beer or a root beer, some hot wings or buffalo shrimp. Go have fun! She is not better than you! She is not better than you! She is not better than you! Keep saying it, because it's true. She is not better than you! FUCK HER! Plain and simple. Jerk off for a while. (Just don't fantasize about her.) Go to a strip club, a very high class one (if you're near big city), just to remind youself how many hot women there are in the world (the strippers are just the tip of the iceberg!) :) There are so many good looking women out there without attitudes or mental problems. Take a few credits at local college to see who you might meet.
MOVE ON, bro.
 
Ulter said:
No phucking way!!!! Get a hold of yourself. You go put your schedule of shots together. Write out a new training split, get in the gym and quit whinning on the board. You will be over this mania in 2 weeks. You can certainly get to the other side of 2 weeks can't you? The whole mess will work itself out one way or the other so just put your head down and plough forward. Nothing feels better than being on and nothing is more depressing than coming off. SO YOU STAY ON. I ain't playin with you, get back on schedule. RIGHT NOW! Go get a syringe out and get to work. And don't bring your sorry ass back here until you do.
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Gotta agree with Ulter on this one.

Getting off cycle would only make you more depressed and emotional, after all, that is what usually happens right?

You don't seem too stable as it is so stopping your cycle might not be the wisest decision to make at this point in time.

Where the hell is Needsize to slap some sense into you??
 
fuck bro, i know how you feel and it is absolute shit... no matter how much these fkers tell you to stop thinking bout her and shit, you still will... the only thing that i found that somewhat eased the pain, is having sex with someone else, i wish i had done it sooner... go try and bang and many girls as possible and try not to see her... as hard as it is, TRY as HARD as possible not to see or call her. bro if its doomed for sure, save yourself before you feel to bad..... after you lose the 20lbs mark you will feel like absolute shit. save yourself. do what you can to cut her out your mind and go skrew someone. if shes already made up her mind, all your doing with calling and seeing her is driving her more and ore away, whether she admits it or not. i found someone else, and realized what a bitch i was with before. you WILL recover, its just up to you how long that will take.
 
dude, just dont piss her off. by what you are saying about the closeness of your relationship she prob. knows about your juicing. first thing she will be doing is telling on you like two 1st graders on the playground. a breakup hurts dude, if it was your fault why the relationship didnt go--you will always feel a bit of guilt. but, you will make it bro, best of luck to you!
 
Djicy said:
How old are you ALLTRAPS?
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im 28

shortstack, im not that type, i dont sleep around. i was raised to save yourself for that one person. i know its so old school, but it kinda stuck with me. i know if i went and did that, i would just start crying like a girl and wouldnt be able to go through with it. i hate strip clubs too. i hate sluts, strippers and all that shit. im pretty wierd when it comes to this shit, but these are my values, and were hers too. i cant change, and dont want to. i am not giong to call her anymore, or email her back.

i went to the gym just now, saw a few friends and they helped me work out a bit. it wasnt a record breaking workout, but it was something. i still couldnt get her out of my head.

i gotta get selfish and make myself happy, instead of trying to help her. she obviously doenst want to help me, and is running instead of dealing with my insecurity, which she caused me to have. i honestly dont think i could have done anything different. she fucked up and as much as i want to blame myself, it was her. she just ran from our problems, which caused even more serious problems, the ones she doesnt want to face right now and by leaving, she doesnt have to. i have to accept that, and see that she is being selfish, only looking out for herself, so i have to be the same.
 
if you guys dont mind, i would like to keep this thread going, and write my feelings whenever i need to. reading over what i have wrote and what you guys wrote, i think will help me.
 
alltraps said:
im 28

shortstack, im not that type, i dont sleep around. i was raised to save yourself for that one person. i know its so old school, but it kinda stuck with me. i know if i went and did that, i would just start crying like a girl and wouldnt be able to go through with it. i hate strip clubs too. i hate sluts, strippers and all that shit. im pretty wierd when it comes to this shit, but these are my values, and were hers too. i cant change, and dont want to. i am not giong to call her anymore, or email her back.

i went to the gym just now, saw a few friends and they helped me work out a bit. it wasnt a record breaking workout, but it was something. i still couldnt get her out of my head.

i gotta get selfish and make myself happy, instead of trying to help her. she obviously doenst want to help me, and is running instead of dealing with my insecurity, which she caused me to have. i honestly dont think i could have done anything different. she fucked up and as much as i want to blame myself, it was her. she just ran from our problems, which caused even more serious problems, the ones she doesnt want to face right now and by leaving, she doesnt have to. i have to accept that, and see that she is being selfish, only looking out for herself, so i have to be the same.
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i understand, thats some awsome values my man... hard ones, but good ones. remember, there are many fish in the sea like her. there are many girls that will share the same values, and when your not expecting it, down the road, a girls gonna come around and share the same values as you and make you as, or more happy than this one has. best of luck, be strong.
 
i always say that in life your supposed to meet women/men and go out with them, love them, hate them, fuck them, and break up with them etc...so u learn from these "signifigant others" and move on and look for a different person that privides the good qualities the prior did but doesnt have the bad ones....

...you said this is your first love....if shes got issues go find the one that doesnt..shes around just look or dont look...she'll turn up
 
alltraps said:
you;re right but the matters to tend to, i have no control over. so there is nothing i can do. i just wonder how long before im ok and myself again. thats what scares me. what if it takes months? what then? i dont train all that time and shrink to nothing? what if i never want to train again period? all these paranoid thoughts are in my head. i just cant imagine life without this girl. she really was the one for me. i feel so lost. i know i sound pothetic, but love did some shit to me that i thought was not possible
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Best prescription for a break-up is to read some Ayn Rand. Fountainhead is a good start if you are new.
 
i went to needsizes house for a bit. hes been there for me through this whole thing. him and his wife are good good friends, good listeners, and basicaly let me bitch as long as i want. i feel better at this moment. she didnt email me or call me. i dont know what to think of that. shes either actualy giving me the space i asked for , or shes fine and doenst need me. i cant analyze right now, but im ok as long as i dont see, or hear from her, or about her.
the reality that she really doesnt want to make it work is setting in and i am starting to accept it. i have to, i have no control. i am not going to be desperate and call and beg anymore. im better then that. i loved her and now at least i know she didnt love me. knowing is half the battle
 
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alltraps did make it into the gym today, and managed to squat 405lbs for 5 rock bottom reps, pretty good considering, and he WILL be there tomorrow, hear that bro????
And dont forget you are always welcome at our house, the wife, baby, and handicapped dog all love to have you over
 
Synpax said:
Best prescription for a break-up is to read some Ayn Rand. Fountainhead is a good start if you are new.
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one of my favorite books of all time.
 
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needsize said:
alltraps did make it into the gym today, and managed to squat 405lbs for 5 rock bottom reps, pretty good considering, and he WILL be there tomorrow, hear that bro????
And dont forget you are always welcome at our house, the wife, baby, and handicapped dog all love to have you over
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thanks man, you have no idea how much i appreciate what youve done for me. out of all my friends, you;ve been the most solid and helpfull. i hope one day I DONT HAVE TO help you with anything close to this, but if need be, im there
 
Synpax said:
Best prescription for a break-up is to read some Ayn Rand. Fountainhead is a good start if you are new.
Click to expand...

what kind of books are these? i never read, maybe i should to take my mind off this.
 
HEJ KURWA MAC! Fuc* that shi%* man. Man when i read this i feel like bitc* slaping you in the fuc*** face. You sound like a pussy.. A sorry ass pussy. Come to think of it you sound just like me 2 yrs ago.....its ok man...Listen i ll be honest with you..when i read this shit you posted i litterally swear to god thought i was reading EXACTLY my actions 2 yrs ago and the whole situation.....SHE TELLS YOU SHE IS ONLY 21 (OR IN MY CASE 19) AND LET ME GUESS SHE IS "THE FUCKED UP ONE" ITS NOT YOUR FAULT SHE TELLS YOU ( AND IT ISNT) SHE MAKE SSOME STUPID ASS EXCUSES THAT SHE IS CONFUSED ,, BLA BLA , BLA BLA BLA , YOUNG, BLA BLA,,, BLA,, THAT SHES BEEN HRT BE4 ,,BLA BLA BLA BLA,,. Oh and the bes tthing that i read that made me crack up is the poem, haha thats a bunch of BS.lol......she writing you apoem but....hahah.........also 1 more thing is this girl as you wrote probibaly told you even 3 week sbe4 of the plans you guys were to have...i bet 2 months earlier you were discussing geting maried or some shit....

Shit man i think im getting soem good therapy in myself......(MY cunt bitc* ho **** **** ***** ***** **** slut and i were discussing everything from amriage to moving , to future, education together, plans for houses, etc .she coudl not live without me more than 2 minutes...bla bla bla bla.... meeting the extended family 2 weeks earlier...then ...boom i get the same LOAD OF POINTLESSS CRAP ONLY A SLUT WOULD SAY.......bla this im crazy,, i go tproblems,, blabla.....i never got a real explanation.............well it turns out bitch met some fag(not realy a fag) and all tha tshit tha ti thought ther ewas no other person and she tooo..out th ewindow in 2 weeks.........just 1 day after not pickin gup phone and worying me wha thapened for 1 week tells me this BS......

LOL....check this.......karma to me is BS...but...then again the "treat others as you want to be treaated or else" the world does even actions out.......2 months ago i find out this girl is PREGNANT AT 20, lost her job,guy doesent want to marry her, , parents pist, freinds gone, ALL HER PLANS FOR A COOLLEGE EDUCATION GONE OR REALY DELAYED.. what a diference 1.5 yrs makes......now im not an sob i loved this bitch and still love eh rbut am no tin love an dwill nto be with her.....i wish he rwell and for ehr life to be the best it can........i hope sh eis happy....but jsut goes to show you ...wha tcomes aroudn goes around...
Meanwhile im getting back up on my feat and am almost toataly over this shit now....im so happy i found out this true nature of th egirl be4 we had a family god forbid and children ...then it would of realy screwed up my life mayeb past repair..!!!!!!!!!!!



GOD BLESS YOU BRO....

I think i feel bette rmyself..lol..time for GYM
 
alltraps said:
what kind of books are these? i never read, maybe i should to take my mind off this.
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the fountainhead is a classic written in the 40s (i think) by ayn rand, who was ahead or her time for extolling the virtues of selfishness, without being evil. there is a name for this, can't think of it.

the fountainhead is a great read for a man: it is the story of the rise and fall of two architects:

peter cushing: the ivy league educated, handsome, well connected, charming golden boy who quickly rises to the top of his profession coasting on his charm and plagarism who ultimately exposed and humiliated.

and howard roark: an unconvential architect who designed buildings people originally laughed at, but refused to pander to popular taste. eventually his designs caught on and he became respected and renowned. he stuck to what he believed in and achieved incredible success.
 
PolfaJelfa said:
HEJ KURWA MAC! Fuc* that shi%* man. Man when i read this i feel like bitc* slaping you in the fuc*** face. You sound like a pussy.. A sorry ass pussy. Come to think of it you sound just like me 2 yrs ago.....its ok man...Listen i ll be honest with you..when i read this shit you posted i litterally swear to god thought i was reading EXACTLY my actions 2 yrs ago and the whole situation.....SHE TELLS YOU SHE IS ONLY 21 (OR IN MY CASE 19) AND LET ME GUESS SHE IS "THE FUCKED UP ONE" ITS NOT YOUR FAULT SHE TELLS YOU ( AND IT ISNT) SHE MAKE SSOME STUPID ASS EXCUSES THAT SHE IS CONFUSED ,, BLA BLA , BLA BLA BLA , YOUNG, BLA BLA,,, BLA,, THAT SHES BEEN HRT BE4 ,,BLA BLA BLA BLA,,. Oh and the bes tthing that i read that made me crack up is the poem, haha thats a bunch of BS.lol......she writing you apoem but....hahah.........also 1 more thing is this girl as you wrote probibaly told you even 3 week sbe4 of the plans you guys were to have...i bet 2 months earlier you were discussing geting maried or some shit....

Shit man i think im getting soem good therapy in myself......(MY cunt bitc* ho **** **** ***** ***** **** slut and i were discussing everything from amriage to moving , to future, education together, plans for houses, etc .she coudl not live without me more than 2 minutes...bla bla bla bla.... meeting the extended family 2 weeks earlier...then ...boom i get the same LOAD OF POINTLESSS CRAP ONLY A SLUT WOULD SAY.......bla this im crazy,, i go tproblems,, blabla.....i never got a real explanation.............well it turns out bitch met some fag(not realy a fag) and all tha tshit tha ti thought ther ewas no other person and she tooo..out th ewindow in 2 weeks.........just 1 day after not pickin gup phone and worying me wha thapened for 1 week tells me this BS......

LOL....check this.......karma to me is BS...but...then again the "treat others as you want to be treaated or else" the world does even actions out.......2 months ago i find out this girl is PREGNANT AT 20, lost her job,guy doesent want to marry her, , parents pist, freinds gone, ALL HER PLANS FOR A COOLLEGE EDUCATION GONE OR REALY DELAYED.. what a diference 1.5 yrs makes......now im not an sob i loved this bitch and still love eh rbut am no tin love an dwill nto be with her.....i wish he rwell and for ehr life to be the best it can........i hope sh eis happy....but jsut goes to show you ...wha tcomes aroudn goes around...
Meanwhile im getting back up on my feat and am almost toataly over this shit now....im so happy i found out this true nature of th egirl be4 we had a family god forbid and children ...then it would of realy screwed up my life mayeb past repair..!!!!!!!!!!!



GOD BLESS YOU BRO....

I think i feel bette rmyself..lol..time for GYM
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sounds similar, i dont hate her, i realy do think she is confused and running from the problems instead of facing them. maybe one day she wont be able to run anymore and will get a wake up call when everything comes crashing on her. i dont know if she is talking to a new guy, if she is, that would show me she has NO RESPECT. i dont belive she is thoough. i dont want to know either, it would fucking kill me. it hasnt even been a week yet. but its none of my business what she does, i do wish her all the best and hope she doesnt fuck up her life with doing stupid shit. she is easily influanced by friends and peers and that worries me. she has such a bright future ahead, as long as she doesnt fuck it up and end up like her friends. they are all fucked with NO direction in life at all
 
women get so fucked between 18-24 its scary, they change so much, you dont even recognize them after. so the person you meet when they are 19 is not even close to the same person at 24. they keep using the excuse that they are confused and youug, which is so bullshit, they just refuse to realize this is life and they are an adut now, and cant run from problems forever
 
I wish you the best bro, i didnt wish my bitch any bad either i just found out 2 months ago.

I would want to sure know if there is someone else...becous ebeleive me im 99% sure there is...be a man not a pussy...ask her strait up......if she says ther eis say thank you good bye and thats it.....i know it not that easy..but...If she is like that you dont deserve it...that means you MEAN SHIT TO HER

Anyways good luck im off to gym,
 
PolfaJelfa said:
I wish you the best bro, i didnt wish my bitch any bad either i just found out 2 months ago.

I would want to sure know if there is someone else...becous ebeleive me im 99% sure there is...be a man not a pussy...ask her strait up......if she says ther eis say thank you good bye and thats it.....i know it not that easy..but...If she is like that you dont deserve it...that means you MEAN SHIT TO HER

Anyways good luck im off to gym,
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im not gonna ask her, i cant talk to her, its part of getting over her. if i talk to her, im back at square one. she doenst want me to call or write, so im done with that. i just dont want to find out from someone else.
 
PolfaJelfa said:
Same thing happened to me bro, with a girl i thought i was going to marry that i loved with all my heart. Nothing mattered to me at that point, i WANTED to train but every time i got in gym i just loooked at all the people and thought "what the fuc* are they doing here " this is pointless bunch of bs" . Well i was on a cycle at the time and decided to stay on. I didnt work out for a while. Then once i regained my composure ( to a degree) i came off when i was more emotionally stable. I WOULD NEVER COME OF ANY CYCLE IN THIS POSSITION EVER!...knowing how bad this hurt me i might of done something i could nto regret at this time, or who knows what. I wont lie to you bro, if you realy realy love her its gona be fucked up for a while, but it will get all GOOD BROTHA :) So take some 1st hand advice, relax, eat some good food, take some needed time off , stay on(i would just stay on 500 -750 or so mgs of test), and when all is cool get back in there swinging. Bro you are now in the 1st stage and i am now in the last stage(im back on coming back hard from the bitch who ruined a full year of progress for me) i will get biger than i ever have been and cutter than i ever have been. And you mark my words will be back here in a while writing that you are now getting bigge rthan ever and everything is good and laughing about this day!
Click to expand...

THIS IS NO TIME FOR PCT TRUST ME... AGREED, YOU ARE TOO EMOTIONAL FOR PCT RIGHT NOW.. FIGHT THRU IT BRO, IT HAPPENED TO ME LAST MONTH, THE CLOMID ALMOST ENDED MY LIFE... I SENT YOU A PM..
BE STRONG TRAPMAN. TITAn
 
alltraps said:
what kind of books are these? i never read, maybe i should to take my mind off this.
Click to expand...
didnt i tell you to get a fucking book man in my PM... trust me it helps, when you're off in another world having a crazy adventure, the last thing on ur mind is that bitch who fucked you over. i'm still going thru it, i talked to her 2 days ago, and then nothing, i heard she found some dude ( a real geeky mf'er from what i hear) so i know it wont last, she needs another thug in her life. but anywho, read a book. fall asleep dreaming about whatever ur reading about it puts in a good mindset before you drift off. and start smiling and just saying "hello how are you today" to every pretty girl you pass on the street or in the store. you'll be suprised how many will return the favor and smile back , and even chat with you... you got game bro, it's just like a muscle, the more you use it the stronger it gets..
titan.
we're here for ya man.
 
my advice is this;

stay on the juice. do things that makes you happy. stop whining about some bitch, cause they sure arent worth it.

and let bitches be bitches. do to them what they do to us. exploit them. if you get a girl, then bone her - and dump her. if she likes your cock she'll come crawling back. if not, she ain't worth it. find a new one
 
Mr.X said:
I say stop the cycle completely and do PCT, but don't run clomid (it makes a lot of ppl. emotional) - run some nolvadex and arimidex (low dose) for PCT.

Mr.X
Click to expand...

what he said. If you decide to stop and dp PCT, DO NOT RUN CLOMID.
I did around a breakup and I was a crying fool which is very unlike me.

someone mentioned whey protein for keeping some gains. its also great for incresing serotonin levels so it acts as sort of a natural mood stabalizer which is good for you during this time.

when will u be over it? I hurt like hell for 3 or 4 months. every day you think about it and replay it in your head and it feels like it happened yesterday. people told me that I would be over it when I started having sex with other women. bullshit, I would just imagine they were her. it just takes time. with no contact, in 6 months or so you'll be you again. now, if I saw her in the street, I wouldnt even look twice.

-
good luck bro.
 
geoboy said:
what he said. If you decide to stop and dp PCT, DO NOT RUN CLOMID.
I did around a breakup and I was a crying fool which is very unlike me.

someone mentioned whey protein for keeping some gains. its also great for incresing serotonin levels so it acts as sort of a natural mood stabalizer which is good for you during this time.

when will u be over it? I hurt like hell for 3 or 4 months. every day you think about it and replay it in your head and it feels like it happened yesterday. people told me that I would be over it when I started having sex with other women. bullshit, I would just imagine they were her. it just takes time. with no contact, in 6 months or so you'll be you again. now, if I saw her in the street, I wouldnt even look twice.

-
good luck bro.
Click to expand...

fuck, i had insane dreams about her last night, so fucking vivid, it was so real. then i wake up and cant sleep.
i have to see her in july at a friends wedding. i know its long time from now, but obviously shes gonna bring a date, and thats gonna kill me.

i got up this morning again, feeling like my heart is gonna explode, i dont think this is normal. i might have to go see a doctor. i keep having conversations in my head with her, things i feel i have to tell her. but its nothing i havent told her before, same shit. i cant stop it. i have to go to work right now, and its not good cuz im alone all day. this is when i go crazy. another day i guess. i said last night that im fianly realizing thats its over and she wants nothing from me, but this morning, that realization is not so clear. i still feel hope, and i shouldnt, cuz hope just leads you down roads you dont want to go, they lear to more pain and suffering.

by all means, if you guys are sick of my whinning, please dont read this, right now, im doing this for my healing. it helps me to write what i feel. if mods want to move this to some other forum, like the outdoors forum, please do so,. just not the chat forum.
 
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I just want to chime in with the "life goes on" replies..This goes without saying, everyone knows that in time you will get over it, and get on with your life, and in most cases you will be happier down the road because of it.

I only say this becuase you don't want to be one of those fucking morons that lets one bad time destroy their lives...bailing out of college or work, drinking too much, bailing on your friends and family, you know - things you REALLY can't recover from.

I am an old married guy too - I have lost big and have won big when it comes to this stuff. You will be alright in the end.

Stop the cycle, but don't stop your work. Focus on your workouts, slog through them no matter how weak and lousy you feel - you will feel better when you leave the gym. (A lot better than sitting in front of the tube zoning out and reliving nonsense). Make your short term goals and concentrate on them - in time you will be alright.

Later,


Bluesman
 
alltraps said:
thanks man, you have no idea how much i appreciate what youve done for me. out of all my friends, you;ve been the most solid and helpfull. i hope one day I DONT HAVE TO help you with anything close to this, but if need be, im there
Click to expand...

not a problem, I'm glad that in some small way I can help. I've been there a few times, and I remember how much it hurts, a little too vividly!
As for your cycle, you are losing size too fast right now, DONT come off or you will lose it all, stay on, your head gets a little more into it every day, so you will be able to salvage a lot from this. But if you go clean, you'll make an extra from Baywatch look huge by the time its over
 
I've been through it man... Stay AWAY from the anti-d's... I thought I needed them, and didnt take them, I got my shit worked out and now I feel stronger than ever... Mentally and physically. You will respect yourself much more knowing that you did it on your own. It may take 3 months or 2 years. But the point is you WILL get through it.

P.S. Please, no offense to anyone taking anti-d's... I mean NO disrespect. Just my personal opinions.
 
Well sounds like you are dealing relatively well & have a great support system around (e.g. needsize, etc.) Make you set & stick to the boundaries of where / how / if you communicate with her, and make sure those are clear between the two of you so don't continue to get mixed messages from her or continue to self-fuck your emotions.

Good luck. One day at a time. Hey by July you may be squatting 600 for 5 deep!
 
just got home from work. she called me a few times, 4 i think. she also called me last night at 2am. i didnt pick up any of the calls. she left one message saying she really needs to talk to me, and its killing me so much not to call her back. but i know shes just lonely and needs me right now, and as soon as i call her, she;ll be fine for a few days. i, on the other hand will go back to being fucked like on the first day. i feel fucking sad right now, that she needs me and i wont be there for her. but i gotta remind myself, that she is the one that doesnt want me in her life, not the other way around. she left me alone and hurt, when i needed her more then ever.
 
patsfan1379 said:
when you find "the one", then and only then can you put her before you. until then, f-it dude. be a man.:)
Click to expand...

i DID think she was the one, still do, thats why i did put her before me. i wanted to do everything in the best interest for OUR future. but she didnt. she wanted to do things for her, run away from me and the problems. i know i sound like a chick, but i feel like one and this is taking over my whole life.
 
alltraps said:
to make a long story short, i just broke up, not my choice, with the girl i thought i was going to marry. the reason for the breakup doesnt matter cuz she doesnt think we can work it out. im fucked, i cant sleep, eat or train. its been a week, and i feel worse today then i did the first night. i miss her like mad, and keep thinking there is hope. but she doesnt think so. we had problems that she doesnt think we can overcome, and its easier to run from them then face them. i would do anything to make it work, but im affraid its not up to me at all. so ive lost 12 lbs in a week from not eating. i missed some shots and havent been taking my arals like i should, im a mess. and probably need proffesional help. im in week 6 of 16. should i stop alltogether?
im not sure when i;ll feel better and focused to eat and train. i dont think it will be anytime soon. i never loved anyone before, so i dont know how long this healing process takes. some tell me months, some years. what do yuo guys think? i dont want to take shit and not use it. i just lost all motivation to train and eat. its like bodybuilding doesnt matter anymore. all that matters is her.
Click to expand...

Im kinda in a similar spot,only I was on the breaking up end,now thinking it was a fuck up, and I tell you man stay on,I dont know how pct effects you but if I got on pct right now id be crying into my pillow all fucking day and couldnt function period.

hopefully things work out for you ,your a good man

also bro if you want to train sometime drop me a pm,Im weak as fuck as I havent been in a month,but Ive always been weak anyway.
 
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alltraps said:
i DID think she was the one, still do, thats why i did put her before me. i wanted to do everything in the best interest for OUR future. but she didnt. she wanted to do things for her, run away from me and the problems. i know i sound like a chick, but i feel like one and this is taking over my whole life.
Click to expand...

if she is "the one" to you and you are not "the one" to her then she is not the one. if you let yourself get walked all over she will have no respect for you. And you will have no respect for yourself... If she really and truly wants you she will find you.
 
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