Question for the ladies, it's seckshual in nature....

[cindylou]

They don't always want us in their heads, for one. Some woman push the "what are you thinking" question a bit far. If he is in a mood and doesn't want to say what his problem is then back off. It doesn't mean he's done something wrong or that it's you. He will come to you when he's ready.

The other thing is time to do the things they want to. The gym was a good example. Let them go without bitching about it. The one thing they did before you came around is the one thing their gonna want to do once you're a part of their life.

Sometimes it's time with their friends. Men seem to be more themselves with their friends when they aren't so much with us. What I mean is, some men seem to be a "best behavior" version of themselves when around their chick, so they need time to unwind with their friends.

 

[just...v]

One thing, thou. We women need to be real careful of those type of men that will take advantage. I've been guilty of letting this happen with the father of my children. I'd given and given until I had no sense of self. Getting it back literally meant destruction of the relationship. Sometimes it a very fine line to walk.

 

[cindylou]

One thing, thou. We women need to be real careful of those type of men that will take advantage. I've been guilty of letting this happen with the father of my children. I'd given and given until I had no sense of self. Getting it back literally meant destruction of the relationship. Sometimes it a very fine line to walk.

I wanted more time. Fuck his space. lol. When I stopped bitching about it was when I stopped caring. I remember making a decision to not care and just like that...I didn't.

 

[cindylou]

Its not like anyone is suggesting she let let her husband bang her while she lay there hating it. If you hate having sex w/ ur husband that's a bigger problem...

 

[billfred]

They don't always want us in their heads, for one. Some woman push the "what are you thinking" question a bit far. If he is in a mood and doesn't want to say what his problem is then back off. It doesn't mean he's done something wrong or that it's you. He will come to you when he's ready.

The other thing is time to do the things they want to. The gym was a good example. Let them go without bitching about it. The one thing they did before you came around is the one thing their gonna want to do once you're a part of their life.

Sometimes it's time with their friends. Men seem to be more themselves with their friends when they aren't so much with us. What I mean is, some men seem to be a "best behavior" version of themselves when around their chick, so they need time to unwind with their friends.

Men hate this question. I am always trying to make shit up when my wife ask me that. My favorite response is "If I wanted you to know that I would be talking, not thinking."

The two greatest gifts a woman can give a man are both free:

1) BJ
2 Silence

When they go together is is especially nice.

 

[AFeedz]

The two greatest gifts a woman can give a man are both free:

1) BJ
2 Silence

When they go together is is especially nice.

Don't they always go together? Unless you know women who can talk with a d*ck in their mouth, I guess. Thatd be kind of impressive.

 

[cindylou]

I'd rather be alone than with someone and still alone. I want someone I can talk to and who will talk back to me. If that's too much to ask out of a man then maybe I'll try a woman?

 

[billfred]

I'd rather be alone than with someone and still alone. I want someone I can talk to and who will talk back to me. If that's too much to ask out of a man then maybe I'll try a woman?

No but men don't talk out everything like a woman does.

I hate fighting - prefer to just stay pissed off until the issue dies.

I don't need to discuss every detail of my day. Actually, there is very little of my day I discuss.

Wife has learned to get all the talking out of her system before I get home.

My biggest pet peave is to come home and she get on the phone with one of her friends for 1 hour. Do that shit during the day when I am not around.

 

[billfred]

Don't they always go together? Unless you know women who can talk with a d*ck in their mouth, I guess. Thatd be kind of impressive.

Yes but sometimes you can just give silence.

Also, sometimes you can give the BJ with a big ol shut the hell up sandwich after. That is bliss.

 

[musclemom]

Most of you people are WAY over thinking this, he said it in his first post:

I get really excited by being able to excite her, it's fulfilling for me to get her orgasm. So..... the problem is when she isn't wanting sex, there will be no sex. No oral, no using hands, nada. She controls the sex in our house 100%. Why is it that she feels no obligation to have sex of SOME kind if it's been a week or more.

Now, see, if he'd just work out a "quickie/longie" deal, he'd be golden. But IrightI doesn't WANT a quickie/longie schedule, he wants wife to have orgasms too, and THAT's what's creating the friction. If you'd just be happy being aggressive, taking your pleasure and just fucking her without worrying about her orgasming, she'd probably be cool with that. But you have to turn it into being about HER pleasure. She doesn't need sex/orgasms as often as you do, she needs a cookie once a week. YOU need a cookie more often, so be the g'damned aggressor, say "Hey honey, you up for a quickie?" Fuck her and stop putting PRESSURE on her to be the initiator for sex, and STOP expecting her to feel sexy WHEN SHE DOESN'T.

Dude, you're a pain in the ass, seriously.

I've been through this with my own husband. Took a LOT of time to get it through his head, too. He's the same way, wanting me to be pleased and it just doesn't work that way. I actually start feeling stressed because he wants to please me and I'm not into it emotionally/hormonally, and then I get irritated because I wish he would JUST be aggressive about it and grab a quickie and stop turning everything into "I can't enjoy myself if you're not enjoying yourself." I don't need that kind of pressure. Look, I know men can't get this, but there are times women PREFER being there for him, with him, but don't need/want the sexual energy. Just get over it and accept it. We can be perfectly happy being present and with you and that's all we want and need.

It's not having sex that's the problem, its the fact you're expecting her to initiate and/or become sexually responsive that's the problem. Throw the idea of "quickies/longies" out to her (quickies being something you initiate, pretty much for your pleasure with no pressure for her to orgasm, longies being something she initiates or is mutual and everyone gets something) and see what she says.