i've used every damn thing there is....xanax and valium are NOT long-term solutions, not at all. i rotate the following pretty regularly:
valerian (get the concentrated extract)
kava kava (again, get the extract)
L-theanine (absolutely harmless and really takes the edge off)
5-HTP (buy it anywhere)
baclophen (releases GH too)
GABA (also releases GH alot)
phenibut (in the GHB family, but nice every now and then)
and i personally find that 1 or 2 beers helps things along a great deal. i rarely drink too much, and research shows one or two is healthy.