Need advice, SO mads at me

[Jade19]

A good friend of mine was really upset today and threatening to commit suicide....it was bout 830 and my BF was gonna be home at 930, I knew he'd get mad at me but i went anyways, i didnt think id be gone for so long. I got home at 1120 and there was a note on the frig that said thanks for calling or being here bye...........

I havent called him yet because i know hes out drinking with his friends and i dont wanna get screamed at and have a worse night...... I know he wont be home til tomorrow so im just trying to take it easy.....

Am i wrong by not calling still??

 

[DIVISION]

A good friend of mine was really upset today and threatening to commit suicide....it was bout 830 and my BF was gonna be home at 930, I knew he'd get mad at me but i went anyways, i didnt think id be gone for so long. I got home at 1120 and there was a note on the frig that said thanks for calling or being here bye...........

I havent called him yet because i know hes out drinking with his friends and i dont wanna get screamed at and have a worse night...... I know he wont be home til tomorrow so im just trying to take it easy.....

Am i wrong by not calling still??

Well you should have called when you realized you were going to go to your friend's aid, and you didn't. Basically you made your bed, now you have to lay in it. I can't say whether you are "wrong" or not, it's your life. I just think that as much as women bitch about "communication" that it would be second nature for you to have the common courtesy to let your BF know you'd be out late attending to your friend.

You chose to ignore that and blow it off, so now you pay the price. Hopefully he's just out drinking with friends and not fucking a hot piece of ass on the side in the corner of a sleazy motel room.

Women......

You females do the most inane things, then come back later and ask "am I still wrong?".






DIV

 

[spongebob]

which thread are you gonna edit, make it quick before i bomb you for that.

 

[DIVISION]

which thread are you gonna edit, make it quick before i bomb you for that.

Bomb her anyway..........



DIV

 

[H_T_]

sounds like you and your friends have your shit together, Congrats!

 

[DIVISION]

sounds like you and your friends have your shit together, Congrats!

DIV

 

[H_T_]

advice: grow up. save the drama for Jerry Springer auditions. people who threaten suicide are psycho. people who cater to psychos are dumbasses. people like me who waste their time answering advice threads are jackasses, thinking that you may listen to a single word of good advice.

 

[DIVISION]

thinking that you may listen to a single word of good advice.

That's the worst part of it, bro.

Thinking that these idiot are actually smart enough to follow the advice.




DIV

 

[H_T_]

gotta love threads that contain :suicide, drinking, mad, etc., fine recipe there.

 

[dirty~d~]

From the woman's side, I would have to agree with Div that you should have at least called him to let him know that you needed to help a friend.

I was stood up a few months back... no show no call, sitting all by myself in the bar, dressed up... and I was fuming. The next day I found out a friend of his had an emergency. A quick call saying 'let's reschedule, I have to help someone.' would have been enough.

Communication... VERY important.

 

[spongebob]

i feel like bombing you for him.

first off, why didnt you just let him know. even after you got over there.

second, what is he, some jelous BF that dont trust you, for you to think he would get mad at you for helping a suicidal friend?

finally, are you screwing around?

 

[DIVISION]

From the woman's side, I would have to agree with Div that you should have at least called him to let him know that you needed to help a friend.

I was stood up a few months back... no show no call, sitting all by myself in the bar, dressed up... and I was fuming. The next day I found out a friend of his had an emergency. A quick call saying 'let's reschedule, I have to help someone.' would have been enough.

Communication... VERY important.

A fuming Dee is not something to fuck with.......



DIV

 

[Jade19]

From the woman's side, I would have to agree with Div that you should have at least called him to let him know that you needed to help a friend.

I was stood up a few months back... no show no call, sitting all by myself in the bar, dressed up... and I was fuming. The next day I found out a friend of his had an emergency. A quick call saying 'let's reschedule, I have to help someone.' would have been enough.

Communication... VERY important.

i agree with you totally but hes really controling and i make dumb decisions to try to avoid gettin b@#ched @. Its happens almost everyday, im talking about stuff like i will take out all the garbages before he gets home and he'll b@#ch about a piece of paper on the counter..........

 

[velvett]

Yes, you should have called after you came home and you should have called or left a big note as to where you were when you left. It's just common courtesy whether you're talking about a lover, friend, boss, employee or anyone that would have to wait around for you.

Even UPS leaves a note when they've arrived and left.

Just reverse the rolls as how you would feel if you were he and he was you.

 

[SoKlueles]

is Hardrock her bf?

 

[Jade19]

Yes, you should have called after you came home and you should have called or left a big note as to where you were when you left. It's just common courtesy whether you're talking about a lover, friend, boss, employee or anyone that would have to wait around for you.

Even UPS leaves a note when they've arrived and left.

Just reverse the rolls as how you would feel if you were he and he was you.

Your totally right, just showing respect is important, which i was too chicken sh@t to call. I went and picked him up hes passed out drunk now, but hes not mad anymore. We talked it out. Do any of you have a SO who yells a lot?

 

[SoKlueles]

Your totally right, just showing respect is important, which i was too chicken sh@t to call. I went and picked him up hes passed out drunk now, but hes not mad anymore. We talked it out. Do any of you have a SO who yells a lot?

yeah, but he only yells when hes losing his karma bookie thing or something about golf or such
Yelling isnt the way to go.....it really gets nothing said at all. You shouldnt let him run over you but i do agree on that......you should have called or left a note or something for him.

 

[Daisy_Girl]

Do any of you have a SO who yells a lot?

No. Because we respect each other. If either of us felt the need to belittle or yell at each other constantly, we wouldn't be together.



If I were "missing" for a few hours my husband would kick my ass (not literally). This would worry him sick - he would be picturing me dead in a ditch. I would be worried sick too if the situation were reversed.

You did not respect him by not telling him, and he is not respecting you, it seems, on a daily basis.

My thoughts, for what they are worth:

1) You are 100% wrong for not calling him or leaving a note and telling him what was going on. The fact that he would be mad at you for attending to a friend is a cause for concern. WTF? Are you a slave? But seriously, you should have called or left a note. This is the MATURE thing to do.

2) You still need to rethink this relationship - both of you. This does NOT sound like a loving, equal relationship. This sounds like a relationship based off of control and fear. Not a healthy mix.

 

[Jade19]

yeah, but he only yells when hes losing his karma bookie thing or something about golf or such
Yelling isnt the way to go.....it really gets nothing said at all. You shouldnt let him run over you but i do agree on that......you should have called or left a note or something for him.

Your right i shouldve.... i feel really bad about it. I dont know if anyone had parents who screamed at you your entire life, but i did. Unfortunatley i have this stupid fear/resentment against being yelled at. My parents were really bad, the cops would come to my house when i was younger and my dad would leave bruises behind. It could almost be described as a phobia which i try to work on because i know its for the best...........

 

[Y_lifter]

I hate Yelling People....

Yes, IMO you should have left a note as a courtesy..

I got the SO guilt trip about no notes until I learned this lesson
that some people worry and get pissed about it..

 

[velvett]

I dont know if anyone had parents who screamed at you your entire life, but i did. Unfortunatley i have this stupid fear/resentment against being yelled at....

I did.

You have to find a way to cope with this, sooner than later as it will effect many aspects of your life.

If I had to give you one suggestion it would be to be one step ahead of any potential confrontation, even if it's minor. So if you have done everything in your power that someone can't rationally be upset with you then you'll get the confidence to respond to anything that could unexpectedly come your way.

 

[Jade19]

Yes, Hardrock is my BF we've been together for almost 2 years (broke up for bout 2 or 3 months). Lived Together for about a year now.

I just get confused and frustrated. I lost my job (which paid really well) when i was pregnant with his kid, and hes hard on me for it. I got fired because of the doc appts i took days off for. He wants more spending cash and i have a new job but he wants me to pay him for the time i didnt have a job and he paid our bills. I have had a job since i was 14 years old, this was the longest time i have been unemployed since then........im almost 20 now. And he thinks I take it as a joke but i feel terrible for it. I started paying bills for myself at the age of 14 and it makes me proud/feel good about myself.

I Like to take care of myself, no one else can give me that gratification.

 

[SoKlueles]

jade you need to empty ur pm box i have a link to send u

 

[Gymgurl]

No. Because we respect each other. If either of us felt the need to belittle or yell at each other constantly, we wouldn't be together.



If I were "missing" for a few hours my husband would kick my ass (not literally). This would worry him sick - he would be picturing me dead in a ditch. I would be worried sick too if the situation were reversed.

You did not respect him by not telling him, and he is not respecting you, it seems, on a daily basis.

My thoughts, for what they are worth:

1) You are 100% wrong for not calling him or leaving a note and telling him what was going on. The fact that he would be mad at you for attending to a friend is a cause for concern. WTF? Are you a slave? But seriously, you should have called or left a note. This is the MATURE thing to do.

2) You still need to rethink this relationship - both of you. This does NOT sound like a loving, equal relationship. This sounds like a relationship based off of control and fear. Not a healthy mix.

I agree 100% with daisy....twoother things to consider....sounds like a alcohol problem maybe needs to be addressed and that it might be an abusive relationship....and if your not married then why not get the heck out

 

[DIVISION]

Yes, Hardrock is my BF we've been together for almost 2 years (broke up for bout 2 or 3 months). Lived Together for about a year now.

I just get confused and frustrated. I lost my job (which paid really well) when i was pregnant with his kid, and hes hard on me for it. I got fired because of the doc appts i took days off for. He wants more spending cash and i have a new job but he wants me to pay him for the time i didnt have a job and he paid our bills. I have had a job since i was 14 years old, this was the longest time i have been unemployed since then........im almost 20 now. And he thinks I take it as a joke but i feel terrible for it. I started paying bills for myself at the age of 14 and it makes me proud/feel good about myself.

I Like to take care of myself, no one else can give me that gratification.

Hardrock is a good bro. I'm suprised at these accusations. It sounds like there are alot of underlying issues here, more than can be dealt with here.

You're only 20, so why are you staying in the relationship if you seem so miserable?




DIV

 

[Lestat]

another EF couple airing the dirty laundry for all to see

 

[DIVISION]

another EF couple airing the dirty laundry for all to see

I know....it's getting pretty grimy here.

C&C drama.......




DIV

 

[Daisy_]

No. Because we respect each other. If either of us felt the need to belittle or yell at each other constantly, we wouldn't be together.



If I were "missing" for a few hours my husband would kick my ass (not literally). This would worry him sick - he would be picturing me dead in a ditch. I would be worried sick too if the situation were reversed.

You did not respect him by not telling him, and he is not respecting you, it seems, on a daily basis.

My thoughts, for what they are worth:

1) You are 100% wrong for not calling him or leaving a note and telling him what was going on. The fact that he would be mad at you for attending to a friend is a cause for concern. WTF? Are you a slave? But seriously, you should have called or left a note. This is the MATURE thing to do.

2) You still need to rethink this relationship - both of you. This does NOT sound like a loving, equal relationship. This sounds like a relationship based off of control and fear. Not a healthy mix.

Couldnt have said it better.

 

[chewyxrage]

Holy shit, you should find a different board to post this stuff on. I can't fathom why you post it on a board where your BF is a well known member

 

[Daisy_]

Holy shit, you should find a different board to post this stuff on. I can't fathom why you post it on a board where your BF is a well known member

Who is her bf?

 

[DIVISION]

Who is her bf?

hardrock.......

He's a veteran on EF.

I'm shocked at these accusations against the guy.

He's a good bro.





DIV

 

[Daisy_]

yikes. thats a little risky posting things about personal life like that.

 

[DIVISION]

yikes. thats a little risky posting things about personal life like that.

The damage is done.

People know.

Women.






DIV

 

[HumorMe]

i agree with you totally but hes really controling and i make dumb decisions to try to avoid gettin b@#ched @. Its happens almost everyday, im talking about stuff like i will take out all the garbages before he gets home and he'll b@#ch about a piece of paper on the counter..........

Fuck him. Let him do the chores around the house.

 

[slat1]

No. Because we respect each other. If either of us felt the need to belittle or yell at each other constantly, we wouldn't be together.



If I were "missing" for a few hours my husband would kick my ass (not literally). This would worry him sick - he would be picturing me dead in a ditch. I would be worried sick too if the situation were reversed.

You did not respect him by not telling him, and he is not respecting you, it seems, on a daily basis.

My thoughts, for what they are worth:

1) You are 100% wrong for not calling him or leaving a note and telling him what was going on. The fact that he would be mad at you for attending to a friend is a cause for concern. WTF? Are you a slave? But seriously, you should have called or left a note. This is the MATURE thing to do.

2) You still need to rethink this relationship - both of you. This does NOT sound like a loving, equal relationship. This sounds like a relationship based off of control and fear. Not a healthy mix.

Daisy is a very smart lady!

 

[Deterass]

Jerry!jerry!jerry!jerry!

 

[Daisy_]

Get on your knees get on your knees.................... (gets on knees)
bark like a dog... Bark like a dog ............................

Anyone who watches jerry knows what Im talking about.
When they want forgiveness to there mate... hehe rather funny.

 

[Daisy_]

Or... The chant...
"Go to Oprah""
""""

 

[velvett]

another EF couple airing the dirty laundry for all to see

Ok now that's funny.

 

[Daisy_]

Ok now that's funny.

.

 

[H_T_]

Get on your knees get on your knees.................... (gets on knees)
bark like a dog... Bark like a dog ............................

Anyone who watches jerry knows what Im talking about.
When they want forgiveness to there mate... hehe rather funny.

lmao, reminds me of Caddyshack, "i will teach you the meaning of the word respect".

 

[jaded]

A good friend of mine was really upset today and threatening to commit suicide....it was bout 830 and my BF was gonna be home at 930, I knew he'd get mad at me but i went anyways, i didnt think id be gone for so long. I got home at 1120 and there was a note on the frig that said thanks for calling or being here bye...........

I havent called him yet because i know hes out drinking with his friends and i dont wanna get screamed at and have a worse night...... I know he wont be home til tomorrow so im just trying to take it easy.....

Am i wrong by not calling still??

Yes, I think you should've called him out of courtesy to let him know. If you had expected your boyfriend to be around and he hadn't shown up hours later, hadn't called or anything, you'd probably be complaining that he was inconsiderate and disrespectful for not calling. Communication is key...

Also, I think you should reconsider whether or not you really want to be airing your dirty laundry and making complaints like this on a board where your boyfriend is also a well-known member. That's really not going to help your relationship and is disrespectful to your boyfriend... if he came on here, knowing that you also post on here, and started making all kinds of complaints about you, I doubt you would be very happy with him.

 

[spongebob]

so hardrock is your boyfriend?

he is going to so pimp slap your ass for this shit women.'

sounds like a crock of shit though.

 

[Lestat]

next thread will be about him laying the smack down and should she call the cops.

 

[spongebob]

like sand thru an hourglass, so are the days of our lifes

 

[hardrock]

Firsty of all Katie, I'd like to thank you for posting our personal issues on my home away from work and home. I'm sorry to everyone for this entire thread, but I do need to say some things.

A good friend of mine was really upset today and threatening to commit suicide....it was bout 830 and my BF was gonna be home at 930, I knew he'd get mad at me but i went anyways, i didnt think id be gone for so long. I got home at 1120 and there was a note on the frig that said thanks for calling or being here bye...........

I havent called him yet because i know hes out drinking with his friends and i dont wanna get screamed at and have a worse night...... I know he wont be home til tomorrow so im just trying to take it easy.....

Am i wrong by not calling still??

If I knew you were helping a friend in need I wouldn't give a fuck how late you were out AS LONG AS I KNEW WHERE YOU WERE.

I had no intentions of going out drinking lastnight. After pacing the apartment for 2 hours with full blown anxiety wondering what happened to you, I had to do something to take my mind off it. Maybe drinking wasn't the best answer, but thats the choice I made.

i agree with you totally but hes really controling and i make dumb decisions to try to avoid gettin b@#ched @. Its happens almost everyday, im talking about stuff like i will take out all the garbages before he gets home and he'll b@#ch about a piece of paper on the counter..........

What you call controlling I call babysitting. As far as bitching about a piece of paper, you gotta be kidding.

2) You still need to rethink this relationship - both of you. This does NOT sound like a loving, equal relationship. This sounds like a relationship based off of control and fear. Not a healthy mix.

I don't consider it controlling. I consider it frustration due to lack of common sense or even giving certain things any thought at all that she knows annoy me.

I just get confused and frustrated. I lost my job (which paid really well) when i was pregnant with his kid, and hes hard on me for it. I got fired because of the doc appts i took days off for. He wants more spending cash and i have a new job but he wants me to pay him for the time i didnt have a job and he paid our bills. I have had a job since i was 14 years old, this was the longest time i have been unemployed since then........im almost 20 now. And he thinks I take it as a joke but i feel terrible for it. I started paying bills for myself at the age of 14 and it makes me proud/feel good about myself.

I don't blame you for losing your job. I do blame you for waiting too long to get your unemployment shit together, thus not quaifying leaving me paying all the bills and broke. And I do expect you to pay me back for all the money I've paid for your half over this peroid. I had plans for this money. One of them being a nice vacation for both of us. If you win your unemployment appeal I would like most of it at one time. If not, well I'm pretty much fucked anyway.

In addition to this while I am working, you spend your time visiting and socializing with your friends instead of finding a real job. Yes you have gotten a job now(with your friends of course), but in the last month have yet to work more than 15 hours a week, or get paid.

Fuck him. Let him do the chores around the house.

Hey fuck you. How about that? If she don't work, she can at least clean.

Once again sorry for all of this everyone. I just couldn't let this shit sit. There are many other things I could bitch and moan about her and I'm sure her me, but these are thing I should be discussing with her. Not all of you.

Once again, I'm sorry

Hardrock

 

[Lestat]

MODS, how about deleting this thread out of respect for hardrock.. I don't think this is really appropriate.

With all the useless locking and moving and deleting going on, you'd think something like this woulda been handled hours ago.

 

[hardrock]

MODS, how about deleting this thread out of respect for hardrock.. I don't think this is really appropriate.

With all the useless locking and moving and deleting going on, you'd think something like this woulda been handled hours ago.

NO. Please do not delete or move this thread, I don't care if you lock it, but there are some things here that she and other need to hear/read.

 

[Lestat]

NO. Please do not delete or move this thread, I don't care if you lock it, but there are some things here that she and other need to hear/read.

gotcha

 

[spongebob]

lestat, shut up. i wanna see this shit play out. this is awesome.

hardrock, i bet your too controlling. even if she is clueless.

 

[jerseyart]

Hardrock.

Dude, dont sweat it maing. She only made herself look bad. Not going to talk trash about your lady, but I dont think many here would blame you for moving on.

She has some maturing to do.

 

[spongebob]

Hardrock.

Dude, dont sweat it maing. She only made herself look bad. Not going to talk trash about your lady, but I dont think many here would blame you for moving on.

She has some maturing to do.

i disagree. i think they both feed this disease of a relationship.

 

[jerseyart]

i disagree. i think they both feed this disease of a relationship.

LOL

Don't be a jerk

This shit is serious for them

 

[jaded]

i disagree. i think they both feed this disease of a relationship.

Whatever their issues are, it was immature and disrespectful of her to post about them on a public internet forum that they both frequent.

 

[spongebob]

LOL

Don't be a jerk

This shit is serious for them

im dead serious.

one thing i can not stand with utmost contempt is an abusive or controlling BF> not saying he is one, but this is not a one sided situation, that i would bet the bank on my friend.

 

[nycgirl]

Whatever their issues are, it was immature and disrespectful of her to post about them on a public internet forum that they both frequent.

She posted something similar on the Girl Talk forum. Maybe she thought some of the ladies were a little too hard on her and she would get more "supportive" responses on the C&C forum.

 

[spongebob]

Whatever their issues are, it was immature and disrespectful of her to post about them on a public internet forum that they both frequent.

regardless, thats not my call, its hers.

she may be looking for support in some way or she may think this will somehow change him or something. i will not trivialize that part of it. we all respond in different ways.

 

[jaded]

she may be looking for support in some way or she may think this will somehow change him or something. i will not trivialize that part of it. we all respond in different ways.

True...unfortunately, her response is indicative of her level of maturity and respect for her partner and their relationship.

She needs to find a better way to respond... if she is unhappy, she should leave. If she wants to work things out, this was not the way to go about it, LOL.

 

[awittyusername]

She posted something similar on the Girl Talk forum. Maybe she thought some of the ladies were a little too hard on her and she would get more "supportive" responses on the C&C forum.

Yes. I'd like to give props to all the guys for not automatically jumping on her side and kiss her ass.

I have been dealing with girls for along time....

There is a reason she didn't call him. (She didn't just forget)

There is a reason she put off her unemployment forms he wanted her to do. (She didn't just forget)

There is a reason she posted this thread here and girls forum. (She didn't just need opinions or accidently made a mistake)

There is a reason guys do the things we do also....We are dumb

 

[spongebob]

True...unfortunately, her response is indicative of her level of maturity and respect for her partner and their relationship.

She needs to find a better way to respond... if she is unhappy, she should leave. If she wants to work things out, this was not the way to go about it, LOL.

i agree 100%, her way of handling it is indictitive of the situation.

its a shame that females feel trapped in situations with abusive/controlling relations. its hard to understand that mentality. again, im speaking in general, not about them.

 

[jerseyart]

Yes. I'd like to give props to all the guys for not automatically jumping on her side and kiss her ass.

I have been dealing with girls for along time....

There is a reason she didn't call him. (She didn't just forget)

There is a reason she put off her unemployment forms he wanted her to do. (She didn't just forget)

There is a reason she posted this thread here and girls forum. (She didn't just need opinions or accidently made a mistake)

There is a reason guys do the things we do also....We are dumb

Best post.


I'd say a lot more, but none of my business. But nobody is that stupid

 

[hardrock]

I just want to add that I love her very much and would be miserable without her. Never have I loved a girl the way I love her.She tells me she feels the same way. We just have some comminucation issues and I also am under alot of sterss and probably take some od it out on her without noticing it somethime.

She is pretty mature for a 20 yr old. She is just still stuck in that part of your life where you always need to be with someone. Be it me or just friends, where I actually enjoy my alone time. While I only see most of my friends once or twice a month, it usually involves drinking, which doesn't help. We love each other very much. Just need to try harder on both parts.

 

[jaded]

I just want to add that I love her very much and would be miserable without her. Never have I loved a girl the way I love her.She tells me she feels the same way. We just have some comminucation issues and I also am under alot of sterss and probably take some od it out on her without noticing it somethime.

She is pretty mature for a 20 yr old. She is just still stuck in that part of your life where you always need to be with someone. Be it me or just friends, where I actually enjoy my alone time. While I only see most of my friends once or twice a month, it usually involves drinking, which doesn't help. We love each other very much. Just need to try harder on both parts.

Communication is so important in a relationship - but I'm sure you two already know that.

Good luck to the two of you.

 

[SoKlueles]

I just want to add that I love her very much and would be miserable without her. Never have I loved a girl the way I love her.She tells me she feels the same way. We just have some comminucation issues and I also am under alot of sterss and probably take some od it out on her without noticing it somethime.

She is pretty mature for a 20 yr old. She is just still stuck in that part of your life where you always need to be with someone. Be it me or just friends, where I actually enjoy my alone time. While I only see most of my friends once or twice a month, it usually involves drinking, which doesn't help. We love each other very much. Just need to try harder on both parts.

that was the sweetest thing i have ever read

work it out buddy and you guys will be happy

 

[spongebob]

I just want to add that I love her very much and would be miserable without her. Never have I loved a girl the way I love her.She tells me she feels the same way. We just have some comminucation issues and I also am under alot of sterss and probably take some od it out on her without noticing it somethime.

She is pretty mature for a 20 yr old. She is just still stuck in that part of your life where you always need to be with someone. Be it me or just friends, where I actually enjoy my alone time. While I only see most of my friends once or twice a month, it usually involves drinking, which doesn't help. We love each other very much. Just need to try harder on both parts.

well goodluck but its really not luck based.

and i know people will give me shit for this, because everyone seems to be taking his side. but honestly im not taking either side when i say this. i think you have more than just simple 'communication' problems.

but it really is none of my business. so good luck.

 

[Lestat]

yeah I'd say there are more issues there then just communiction... i think you'll see this trend continue.

 

[Lestat]

don't you guys have cellphones? Couldn't you have called her?

 

[Choderboy]

you can work it out

 

[Daisy_Girl]

I don't consider it controlling. I consider it frustration due to lack of common sense or even giving certain things any thought at all that she knows annoy me.

The way she made it sound, was that the BF (you) was a controlling jerk and she was the innocent. I apologize for my post sounding like you were 100% controlling, I should have clarified that you sounded controlling by what *she* had said so far.

If you are a controlling jerk - fuck you. If she is an immature lazy whiny baby - fuck her. lol

BUT, it does take 2 to tango. NOBODY can take advantage of you without your permission ....................

 

[jerseyart]

Communication is so important in a relationship - but I'm sure you two already know that.

Good luck to the two of you.: )

You talk to much.

Ill have to figure out some way to shut you up

 

[hardrock]

don't you guys have cellphones? Couldn't you have called her?

I do, and she doesn't. Even though she doesn't right now, it's not too hard to find a phone these days.

 

[bicepts101]

i must be reading this thread wrong....so the chicks freind was going to kill himself so she went to his aid and didnt tell her bf. whats the big deal?....just call him and tell him he'll understand.

 

[hanselthecaretaker]

i agree with you totally but hes really controling and i make dumb decisions to try to avoid gettin b@#ched @. Its happens almost everyday, im talking about stuff like i will take out all the garbages before he gets home and he'll b@#ch about a piece of paper on the counter..........

If he's controlling or overbearing, then that's bad news for the two of you and any type of healthy relationship you may be trying to build.

Does he get upset or hotheaded if you talk to other guys, say at a bar? Hopefully this, if an issue, is something that could be addressed and discussed in a civil manner.

 

[Roxy725]

wait...i'm confused.

 

[hanselthecaretaker]

another EF couple airing the dirty laundry for all to see

I make my living off the evening news
Just give me something-something I can use
People love it when you lose,
They love dirty laundry

Well, I coulda been an actor, but I wound up here
I just have to look good, I don’t have to be clear
Come and whisper in my ear
Give us dirty laundry

Kick ’em when they’re up
Kick ’em when they’re down
Kick ’em when they’re up
Kick ’em when they’re down
Kick ’em when they’re up
Kick ’em when they’re down
Kick ’em when they’re up
Kick ’em all around

We got the bubble-headed-bleach-blonde who
Comes on at five
She can tell you ’bout the plane crash with a gleam
In her eye
It’s interesting when people die-
Give us dirty laundry

Can we film the operation?
Is the head dead yet?
You know, the boys in the newsroom got a
Running bet
Get the widow on the set!
We need dirty laundry

You don’t really need to find out what’s going on
You don’t really want to know just how far it’s gone
Just leave well enough alone
Eat your dirty laundry

Kick ’em when they’re up
Kick ’em when they’re down
Kick ’em when they’re up
Kick ’em when they’re down

Kick ’em when they’re up
Kick ’em when they’re down
Kick ’em when they’re stiff
Kick ’em all around

Dirty little secrets
Dirty little lies
We got our dirty little fingers in everybody’s pie
We love to cut you down to size
We love dirty laundry

We can do the innuendo
We can dance and sing
When it’s said and done we haven’t told you a thing
We all know that crap is king
Give us dirty laundry!

Don Henley-Dirty Laundry


...Just because it's a cool song; no more, no less.

 

[hanselthecaretaker]

like sand thru an hourglass, so are the days of our lifes

must spread karma......

 

[hardrock]

If he's controlling or overbearing, then that's bad news for the two of you and any type of healthy relationship you may be trying to build.

Does he get upset or hotheaded if you talk to other guys, say at a bar? Hopefully this, if an issue, is something that could be addressed and discussed in a civil manner.

No I totally trust her. She has more guy friends than girls. I have met most of them and like them as well. I like the guys more than the girls. They seem to be better influences on her.


The main thing is we are both really trying to make this work, but we realize that if this keeps up, or relationship will end. One of the things she was working on is letting me know when she's gonna be late or where she went if I'm expecting to see her when I get home. It worried me and at the same time made me angry. The way I dealt with it was to go have some beers with the guys, which is one of the things that I'm supposed to be working on.

It's a lose lose situation. I really hope we can work things out.

 

[hanselthecaretaker]

Firsty of all Katie, I'd like to thank you for posting our personal issues on my home away from work and home. I'm sorry to everyone for this entire thread, but I do need to say some things.



If I knew you were helping a friend in need I wouldn't give a fuck how late you were out AS LONG AS I KNEW WHERE YOU WERE.

I had no intentions of going out drinking lastnight. After pacing the apartment for 2 hours with full blown anxiety wondering what happened to you, I had to do something to take my mind off it. Maybe drinking wasn't the best answer, but thats the choice I made.



What you call controlling I call babysitting. As far as bitching about a piece of paper, you gotta be kidding.



I don't consider it controlling. I consider it frustration due to lack of common sense or even giving certain things any thought at all that she knows annoy me.



I don't blame you for losing your job. I do blame you for waiting too long to get your unemployment shit together, thus not quaifying leaving me paying all the bills and broke. And I do expect you to pay me back for all the money I've paid for your half over this peroid. I had plans for this money. One of them being a nice vacation for both of us. If you win your unemployment appeal I would like most of it at one time. If not, well I'm pretty much fucked anyway.

In addition to this while I am working, you spend your time visiting and socializing with your friends instead of finding a real job. Yes you have gotten a job now(with your friends of course), but in the last month have yet to work more than 15 hours a week, or get paid.




Hey fuck you. How about that? If she don't work, she can at least clean.

Once again sorry for all of this everyone. I just couldn't let this shit sit. There are many other things I could bitch and moan about her and I'm sure her me, but these are thing I should be discussing with her. Not all of you.

Once again, I'm sorry

Hardrock

Well, I didn't get to this one til now. I'm not going to pick sides, that's for sure. It isn't my place, or anyone else's who isn't familiar with these two's situation.

We must be Switzerland, people.

 

[Jade19]

She posted something similar on the Girl Talk forum. Maybe she thought some of the ladies were a little too hard on her and she would get more "supportive" responses on the C&C forum.

I didnt think that any of the girls on girl talk forum were hard on me. All the ladies can read my thread on here too, (like yourself). I started this thread to get some advice unfortunatley my friends dont ever have anything good to say if i ask for advice, plus i like to vent. Support isnt what i was seeking I didnt think I'd get it because i felt bad for not calling it was unfair of me. I am an extremly open person.... I didnt think that it would be considered inmature to ask for input, a lot of people on elite ask for advice.

There are a lot more things that play into our relationship and its problems.

 

[jerseyart]

Kids do both of yourselves a favor and take this offline

 

[Jade19]

Yes. I'd like to give props to all the guys for not automatically jumping on her side and kiss her ass.

I have been dealing with girls for along time....

There is a reason she didn't call him. (She didn't just forget)

There is a reason she put off her unemployment forms he wanted her to do. (She didn't just forget)

There is a reason she posted this thread here and girls forum. (She didn't just need opinions or accidently made a mistake)

There is a reason guys do the things we do also....We are dumb

I dont want any guy or girl to kiss my ass i admitted i knew it was wrong, my original question was ......am i wrong for still not calling him? I meant after i got home and seen his note....

he was on my mind and i wanted to call but like i said i dont like getting yelled at, hes a screamer. I dont yell back , i cant even raise my voice w/o getting told to shut the f#$k up. You all might think im inmature and stuff now for posting personal things on here but WE HAVE COMMUNICATION PROBLEMS, which is obvious now to all of you

I did want opinions that was the whole point guys and girls, it was like should i call now, or let him vent and have him call me when hes ready ....anger issues.....


Im not lazy, i messed up on my paper work for U.I. - I dont like to have someone support me - but he doesnt think/know how much work i actually did to try to get a job. I couldnt even tell you how many places I applied at.
I was getting desperate and my friend got me a job.....

Dan,
As for me needing to be with someone all to time - im not - but in the last year a lot of ruff times have come about in my life and i like to go see my family and my close friends. You work ur A@# off every week and your gone a lot. I dont wanna be alone all the time ........

Sorry to everyone and to you dan for posting this i didnt think it would be considered disrespectful/inmature to ask for opinions

 

[Lestat]

Kids do both of yourselves a favor and take this offline

.

 

[awittyusername]

I dont want any guy or girl to kiss my ass i admitted i knew it was wrong, my original question was ......am i wrong for still not calling him? I meant after i got home and seen his note....

he was on my mind and i wanted to call but like i said i dont like getting yelled at, hes a screamer. I dont yell back , i cant even raise my voice w/o getting told to shut the f#$k up. You all might think im inmature and stuff now for posting personal things on here but WE HAVE COMMUNICATION PROBLEMS, which is obvious now to all of you

I did want opinions that was the whole point guys and girls, it was like should i call now, or let him vent and have him call me when hes ready ....anger issues.....


Im not lazy, i messed up on my paper work for U.I. - I dont like to have someone support me - but he doesnt think/know how much work i actually did to try to get a job. I couldnt even tell you how many places I applied at.
I was getting desperate and my friend got me a job.....

Dan,
As for me needing to be with someone all to time - im not - but in the last year a lot of ruff times have come about in my life and i like to go see my family and my close friends. You work ur A@# off every week and your gone a lot. I dont wanna be alone all the time ........

Sorry to everyone and to you dan for posting this i didnt think it would be considered disrespectful/inmature to ask for opinions

I wasn't saying you were looking to have your ass kissed. I was complimenting all the guys, because unsually in these situations (here and in real life) guys automatically take the girls side. Say things like..."You can do better than him...What a dick" etc

I am sorry my comments upset you. I was only talking about Guy/Girl relationships in general. I will stay out of it, and like the rest of the guys said...Don't discuss this here..do it at home.

Good luck guys