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My boyfriend is getting fat........

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jennifer said:
I have been dating this guy for over 2 years now. And he's a really cool guy-------BUT he doesn't workout, and never really has. He had his shirt off last night, and WOW, what a pot belly.

Its not just the physical appearance that bugs me, its the difference in lifestyle that's getting to me. When I'm eating my chicken and rice, he's eating pizza.

I'm concerned about his health, and wonder what he's going to look like in 5 years.

I have talked to him about changing his ways for health reasons, but I haven't told him that he's getting pretty chubby.

Its starting to turn me off.....


Anyone been in this situation before?

You have come a long way Jen...didn't you lost all of your weight in the last two years or so? It seems you guy are going in two different directions. Maybe you should have an "intervention" with him about his body if it's bugging you that much. It may not have the best of outcomes but you will have this off your chest.

good luck,
insano
 
Every issue in our relationship is taken seriously. But I don't feel like he is taking this serious at all.

Its not like he has straight out said he dosn't care, but when it comes down to it theres no action on his part.
 
so are you saying you aren't going to punch or poke him?

at least talk?

you could always point out the fantastic specimin that is happyscrappy and tell him that if he can't reach that, then he is pathetic. I like that one b/c it makes me laugh.

magic vibrator my ass
 
you need to weigh how important it is to you... i could never date a girl who isn't into healthy eating... i could give a shit less about her working out or looking like a sex godess... but if she eats like shit, then eventually i am gonna eat like shit... and i have worked too hard to do that to myself... oh who am i kidding... if i knew anything about love i wouild be out there making it instead of typing in a chatroom about it. ugh...
 
Re: Re: My boyfriend is getting fat........

Captain_insano said:


You have come a long way Jen...didn't you lost all of your weight in the last two years or so? It seems you guy are going in two different directions. Maybe you should have an "intervention" with him about his body if it's bugging you that much. It may not have the best of outcomes but you will have this off your chest.

good luck,
insano

It took me 2 years to gain 70 pounds, and this last year I have lost 50. But I have always been into health. Even when I was gaining the weight, I ate healthy things (of course along with all the shit I ate)

He has NEVER worked out seriously in his LIFE, EVER. Thats just odd to me. So I know this is asking alot because he obviously dosn't think its a big deal.

We are going in different directions, and its very confusing. All I can think of is to get him on the healthy path with me, because I'm not going his path.
 
jennifer said:


See, I would never tell him to loose weight, because its NOT that important in our relationship for him to be lean, obviously, because he never has been.

But how do you get someone to care about their health? I figured that I would just lead by example and he would want to do it. I don't want to end up marrying a guy, and have him die of a heart attack at 40, when it could have been prevented.

Oh, and sex is not a part of our relationship, lol. He wants to wait until he's married. But you still need to be sexually attracted to someone for it to work in the long run thats true, very true.

I'm still attracted to him, but once he takes off his shirt, I'm like WOW, lol. I can't help it, but I start grabbing his man tits, its pretty funny, but NOT sexy.

LMFAO!!!! I almost fell off my chair after that comment......LOL

I don't think any male's advice will help you deal with this.

Well, at least you have the foresight to see this is a possible
long-term problem for the relationship.

Fonz
 
HappyScrappy said:
so are you saying you aren't going to punch or poke him?

at least talk?

you could always point out the fantastic specimin that is happyscrappy and tell him that if he can't reach that, then he is pathetic. I like that one b/c it makes me laugh.

magic vibrator my ass

I don't feel that teasing him is the answer :(

But I have told him that pretty soon he is going to have bigger boobs then me :D



saint808------thats what I'm trying to do. But I don't want to end a good relationship just because he's not willing to work out----but it may get to that point.



The Nature Boy-----I have expressed my feelings on this many many times, thats why I'm frustrated. Just seems like he dosn't care.
 
jennifer said:


The Nature Boy-----I have expressed my feelings on this many many times, thats why I'm frustrated. Just seems like he dosn't care.

Well what else can you do then? At some point it's really goint to start gnawing at you more and more. Then eventually, you're going to leave. That's how it goes. I've been on the other end where I got nagged about smoking weed (7 years or so ago) and I was like "yeah yeah yeah" and eventually she left. Boy did I feel like shit. But I changed my act after that. Sometimes I don't miss being in serious relationships, it's hard enough to deal with myself let along another person!!!!
 
Re: Re: Re: My boyfriend is getting fat........

jennifer said:




We are going in different directions, and its very confusing. All I can think of is to get him on the healthy path with me, because I'm not going his path.

You could try that...and since you love him i know that you will try. The only thing is...well..er..it's like the "thinfourm" with those poor anerexic girls...if they don't want to change they won't...the same with you bf...he may be going through everyday life feeling like life is great and i have a great gf...little does he know that you really want him to be more healthy...That is fine..i understand where you are coming from 100%...but just heed these words. "you can not change someone, they have to make the change.

Godspeed,
insano
 
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