Men & Cheating

[Cutiebaby]

Samoth said emos get mad when they don't get cheeted on.

One less time to cry and cut themselves.

Lmao. For some reason that makes sense!

 

[musclemom]

Word. To "stay in a relationship" purely for financial and other reasons, is stupid. You're basically lying to the other person by telling them that you love them, solely so you can get the rent paid.

oh, and Nomarriage.com

r

This is my last comment in this thread and I am seriously thinking about it being my last comment on adultery in general:

If it had just been MY ass, JUST me who would have been placed in financial jeopardy, I would have walked out on him in a minute.

It wasn't. I had a kid and my mother's finances were tied up with mine and my husband. I've known women who left and left their kids with the spouse and there was no fucking way I could do that and I couldn't screw my mom financially.

You have more freedom when you don't have people relying on you because their finances are tied up with yours and it's real easy when kids are something you can just walk away from. I had to be able to support my kid, I had to know my mom wasn't going to lose her investment (our house). My husband was a selfish, manipulative nut job who didn't care about anything but his wants, and he didn't care what the quality of our marriage was as long as he kept ME.

Life's real easy when you don't have any fucking responsibilities and the only one who has to face the consequence of your actions is YOU.

 

[heatherrae]

This is my last comment in this thread and I am seriously thinking about it being my last comment on adultery in general:

If it had just been MY ass, JUST me who would have been placed in financial jeopardy, I would have walked out on him in a minute.

It wasn't. I had a kid and my mother's finances were tied up with mine and my husband. I've known women who left and left their kids with the spouse and there was no fucking way I could do that and I couldn't screw my mom financially.

You have more freedom when you don't have people relying on you because their finances are tied up with yours and it's real easy when kids are something you can just walk away from. I had to be able to support my kid, I had to know my mom wasn't going to lose her investment (our house). My husband was a selfish, manipulative nut job who didn't care about anything but his wants, and he didn't care what the quality of our marriage was as long as he kept ME.

Life's real easy when you don't have any fucking responsibilities and the only one who has to face the consequence of your actions is YOU.

True. Also, some abusive men will intentionally make sure that you have NOTHING and no way to leave them. That is what my ex did. He was good at it. I doubt it was his first time.

 

[Smurfy]

Without a doubt - B.

Lying/cheating is not a gender-specific character flaw.

true

i have not read this thread but i think i may take the next 20 mins a peruse. is it entertaining? is there a lot of man and woman bashing going on?

 

[Smurfy]

I think the proper way to word it is....

from a hard wiring and evolutionary psychology standpoint, cheating (moreso from the male perspective) is in fact imbeded in our genetics. Males are conditioned to spread their seed as much as possible.For women, it's different in that they seek the most capable male to carry their seed due to limited fertility time as well as the great cost of resources and time it is to be pregnant. Therefore when they find another male more capable, they are more inclined to be with that male.

HOWEVER, as we have progressed and evolved..social conditioning can and has altered these. we are not slaves to this genetic programming. people with integrity and character can prevent this bullshit

i dont believe CHEATING is hardwired as much as I believe that we perhaps were not meant to be monogomous for life. i dont think its hardwired for us to get into a committed relationship and then cheat or be intimate behind that person;s back with others.

but i do believe that very few people will achieve monogamy for their lifetime. its rare.

 

[izap1]

Having sex is in human nature, period. Trust is also engrained in humans, I would imagine it aided in survival at some point. So the two qualities sometimes collide.

Actually, "trust" is totally a social concept. It is something that is learned. Kinda like ones "sense of honor". Sex is genetic.
Let's think about the word "trust". It has different meanings in different societies. People have different levels of trust and others are comfortable trusting while some aren't. It can become just as important as any genetic trait like sexual attraction but I really believe it is a learned behavior. Not a natural one.

"Trust" is a concept we invented and evolved ourselves. Sex is just priminal and natural.

 

[Smurfy]

if an infant doesnt develop a sense of trust of its mother, it would die FYI

 

[izap1]

if an infant doesnt develop a sense of trust of its mother, it would die FYI

oh please that infant would probably suck on any nipple that comes its way merely to please its physical needs. lol humans would do anything as their main goals are self-preservation and procreation

 

[velvett]

Actually, "trust" is totally a social concept. It is something that is learned. Kinda like ones "sense of honor". Sex is genetic.
Let's think about the word "trust". It has different meanings in different societies. People have different levels of trust and others are comfortable trusting while some aren't. It can become just as important as any genetic trait like sexual attraction but I really believe it is a learned behavior. Not a natural one.

"Trust" is a concept we invented and evolved ourselves. Sex is just priminal and natural.

Ever watch animal planet?

Meerkat Manor?

Learn about Alpha male, Alpha female?

Or Pack mentality?

We didn't create trust and it's ridiculous to think that we are expected to behave like evolved animals in all other aspects of our lives but make excuses for ourselves when it comes to sex so we don't have to take the blame for our own callous actions.

In the animal world if I am not the alpha female and I want to make the alpha male mine my course of action would be to destroy the alpha female (even if she is my own kin) and take her place as the new alpha female to have the male I wanted.

Interestingly enough that sort of behavior is viewable right here on EF (*SNARF*) and on the one hand we turn our noses up at the behavior and on the other we say oh it's ok, it's primal it what we're wired for.

 

[calveless wonder]

Ever watch animal planet?

Meerkat Manor?

Learn about Alpha male, Alpha female?

Or Pack mentality?

We didn't create trust and it's ridiculous to think that we are expected to behave like evolved animals in all other aspects of our lives but make excuses for ourselves when it comes to sex so we don't have to take the blame for our own callous actions.

In the animal world if I am not the alpha female and I want to make the alpha male mine my course of action would be to destroy the alpha female (even if she is my own kin) and take her place as the new alpha female to have the male I wanted.

Interestingly enough that sort of behavior is viewable right here on EF (*SNARF*) and on the one hand we turn our noses up at the behavior and on the other we say oh it's ok, it's primal it what we're wired for.

http://modstorage.goberserker.com/Grendo/Other/Snarf.jpg