i dont mean to sound mushy but..
thanks everyone for your words, i been this way for as long as i can remeber its always been a situational thing i use to think i was just shy but now that i have more knowledge about myself under my belt i would like to pursue other avenues of releif and comfort about this "situational thing" maybe its from other issues imbalances or whatever but im gonna amke it number 1 priority in my life , you wanna hear something funny i never use to get into fights cause my flight mode would kick in fast then that led to panic thus easy victory for my oponent i would be literally paralized with anxiety and have lttle muscle control and strebght would fly out the window . but im not looking to be vengfull or revenge i just wanna attack oppertunities with vengance in my life to come. BELIEVE it or not i have NEVER EVER told a single sole on this ENTIRE planet about this problem i am having, sure people in my life assumed things about me but i never told them the way i felt. sometimes family members cannot be of aid as i learned that very quickly growing up, maybe thats why i keep everything to myself and dont share my feelings.
moose-
today ive had it bro i dont care what it takes i wanna feel normal i know youve given me advice b4 about this and believe me i didnt forget took it and stored it in the back of my mind, now its time for me to act.
i amaze myself in many ways for instance i will inject a foreign substance thats made in another country with no rules or guidlines for sanitation, to get better results with less effort in a gym, rather take a pill that meets all the guidlines and live in a world of non-worrying or panicing feelings ect..
i just wanna say thanks again everyone i will take heed to all your advices