Is this strange?

[Stefka]

These are conflicting. To be honest (without knowing you or your situation), in general, people LOVE to hate. Not just cause it's easy, but because it is a very strong emotion and sometimes, in our monotonous daily routines and generally boring lives, getting to experience a real and strong emotion is euphoric. Plus it gives us a purpose, something to think about, something to "do" or even "be".

Just something to think about.

I agree.
I loved him.
Bad bad bad things happend.
I almost lost my family and all of my friends because of him.
I am still repairing those relationships.
When I don't have to talk to him I can remain somewhat indifferent.
But when I have to speak to him I find myself laughing at his stupid stories and cursing him outright.
I was fine when I didn't have to talk to him at all.
And now, I'm going to have to continue talking to him through October.
He is a bad bad person, and I would just like to forget.
But now I have to deal with so much - including a very sweet girl who I dont want to see go through the same thing I went through.

 

[KillahBee]

I agree.
I loved him.
Bad bad bad things happend.
I almost lost my family and all of my friends because of him.
I am still repairing those relationships.
When I don't have to talk to him I can remain somewhat indifferent.
But when I have to speak to him I find myself laughing at his stupid stories and cursing him outright.
I was fine when I didn't have to talk to him at all.
And now, I'm going to have to continue talking to him through October.
He is a bad bad person, and I would just like to forget.
But now I have to deal with so much - including a very sweet girl who I dont want to see go through the same thing I went through.

As I said in the k message I sent you (and I realize this is an "easier said than done" thing, but it's more than possible and realistic) - the issue/challenge here isn't "him". It's your reactions / emotional responses / way of dealing with him. There will ALWAY be people we don't want to interact with or have around, some mroe difficult than others. All we can do is control ourselves - our responses, our way of dealing with the situation, our emotions.

I know it sounds too simple and all that, but if you actually buy into this way of thinking, life gets REAL easy. It takes work, but man, it's a breeze when it actually materializes.

Sorry, I'm all self-help guy right now.

 

[Stefka]

As I said in the k message I sent you (and I realize this is an "easier said than done" thing, but it's more than possible and realistic) - the issue/challenge here isn't "him". It's your reactions / emotional responses / way of dealing with him. There will ALWAY be people we don't want to interact with or have around, some mroe difficult than others. All we can do is control ourselves - our responses, our way of dealing with the situation, our emotions.

I know it sounds too simple and all that, but if you actually buy into this way of thinking, life gets REAL easy. It takes work, but man, it's a breeze when it actually materializes.

Sorry, I'm all self-help guy right now.

Hey dude, I need a self help guy at the moment.
Things are quite fucked up.
I'm not too worried about him.
I know these things will happen when I am back in that town...
I will kick the asshole
I will hug the girlfriend
I will get drunk with the asshole
I will tell off the asshole
I will feel bad about that (he really is that good)
I will buy the asshole a few drinks
I will keep the asshole out of jail
I will do the things that need to be done - with or without the asshole
I will play in the mountains
I will see other old friends
I will kick the asshole again
I will hug the girlfriend again
I will fly away from that town and (hopefully) never look back

How does that sound?

 

[KillahBee]

Sounds like I would expect it to.

As long as you know the deal and aren't gonna do anything that will piss you off later, it's all good IMO. It's all a foregone conclusion it seems, so what the hey. Life's all about experiences, right?

Do you see sexual attraction in the mix here?

 

[Stefka]

Sounds like I would expect it to.

As long as you know the deal and aren't gonna do anything that will piss you off later, it's all good IMO. It's all a foregone conclusion it seems, so what the hey. Life's all about experiences, right?

Do you see sexual attraction in the mix here?

He was great in bed.
But everything else about him just makes me sick.
There are at least 2 other people in that town that I would rather sleep with than him...but this is a strange town.
Please, everyone think good thoughts for me.
Is anyone else here attracted to trouble. I thought I had grown out of this shit.

 

[Stefka]

and I am usually the ice queen
I cant use that character with these kids
that makes things so much harder

 

[layinback]

He was great in bed.
But everything else about him just makes me sick.
There are at least 2 other people in that town that I would rather sleep with than him...but this is a strange town.
Please, everyone think good thoughts for me.
Is anyone else here attracted to trouble. I thought I had grown out of this shit.

you mentioned keeping him out of jail.....hmmmm. dynamite in the sack. got you at odds with friends and family ? look up "antisocial personality disorder" sociopathic men have a magnetic effect on women. especially women prone to be codependent. any little crevice in the ole self esteem department will be sniffed out and preyed upon. you have described, unintentionally of course, a sociopath or at least someone with traits. do he do drugs? hard time holding a job and paying debts? immature emotionally but intelligent? charismatic, charming?

 

[stilleto]

i smell a threesome.

its not strange that you've talked. you had history with him and have obviously moved on enough to be able to talk. that's GOOD.

 

[LuluDeren]

First, my condolences on the loss of your friend, there is nothing more sad than a suicide.

My opinion...unless this guy is Ted Bundy, don't visit your past problems upon the new gf. At the very least, it will appear as if you've never reconciled the situation, are living in the past, and, from the perspective of the new gf, simply intent on splitting the two of them up.

 

[Cutiebaby]

nothing good can possibly come from that.

I agree..
I mean the ex could end up jealous, or she could end up your best buddy and drive you insane by calling with every little things that he does asking "omg, did he do this and that when you were together?"!!!!
I think the best thing to do would keep a distance