I damn near killed myself masturbating tonight

[puddlemonkey]

Jenny Craig Weight Loss Program

Is that what you're on?

 

[bw1]

Is that what you're on?

lol

 

[FriendlyCanadian]

bahahaha.

you must have really been beating the shit out of your monkey.

 

[puddlemonkey]

ok, you can stop making me relive this nightmare.

 

[FriendlyCanadian]

beat beat beat beat beat beat!!! arghhhearhhea crumpled pile on the ground..

wtf would you slouch forward anyways??

hahahahaha man was your dick chaffed from the friction of such a savage chair imploding cockbeating?

 

[EnderJE]

If we get you a stripper, do you promise to finish it off and kill yourself?

 

[FriendlyCanadian]

I'm going to refer to you as CICB .. from now on.

yes cicb.. the chair imploding cock beater.

 

[SpyWizard]

i know you are informed on masterbation and blindness..

I know you think you can do it up until you just need glasses and then stop..

but braille is hard to learn man..

 

[puddlemonkey]

wtf would you slouch forward anyways??

I was slouched in the chair but doing so leaning back putting too much stress on the back of the chair.

 

[puddlemonkey]

If we get you a stripper

meh, they don't do it for me, I've had too many in the past. I'm intrigued by these mythical, "good girls" I keep hearing about (only from women).