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At What Age...........

housemusik83

housemusik83

New member
Do most of you bros out there said to yourselves... " damn I am getting to that age, maybe i should start settling down, finding a wife, possibly thinking about kids" or maybe not to that extent.... (this questions i rather be answered by the married ones) LOL :p
 
I thought that at age 22. Was engaged. Seeing at that time my situation with my carrer and having a child with her had me thinking of maybe starting a family. Presently that has changed. Everyone at some point considers it. What a difference a time makes.
 
a lot of people would tell you that "age" should not be a motivating factor. . .and i somewhat agree. . .but realistically, age does matter to a certain extent if you think that you may want to have a family. . .we had our last child (my son) three days before my 41st birthday and, although it was the single best birthday of my entire life, as time progresses i'm sure that there may be times when i wish that i was a little younger. . .our situation wasn't a matter of when we started (we got married when i was 27 and she was 25), rather we had problems with fertility when we started trying to have kids (i was 30 and she was 28 when we started trying). . .

that said, we have been together for over 19 years now (16+ married). . .in retrospect, 27-ish was the right age for me. . .i really don't think that i would have been ready much before that age. . .everyone's different though. . .
 
I'm 25 in 2 weeks and im starting to think i dont want to still have kids around when im 40 or 50 you know, I have been together with my girl for over a year and probably the first one that i really fell in love with, before her i was bouncing around and always out every night, well now me and my girl been living together for a solid year and just bought big 4 bdrs house together and everything is great... she is expecting a ring pretty soon, but thats a huge thing for me... but then again im not 21 or 22 anymore... halfway through my 20's and coming to 30 fast!
 
It happened to me at around 29 and then when I turned 30 I got serious, then when I turned again, I'm still waiting for the divorce but the next one is here forever :)
 
I'm 32 and have been thinking taht for years. I actually got engaged on New Years. 4 months later, it was over. Wasn't meant to be I guess. Still looking for that one, but I'm having fun playing the field right now.
 
i wont get married till im 45'ish area .. to much fun being single
 
I got married and had kids younger because I thought that I'd like to have them leave the house when I'm 50. What I didn't realize is what I'd give up when I was in my mid20s.
 
I've had an interesting life but around 30 or so I thought it was about time to settle down. What happens is you'll fine you lost everyone your age to wives and kids or rehab. Night life becomes sort of boring and the crowd seems to be a little young for you. LOL>
 
housemusik83 said:
I'm 25 in 2 weeks and im starting to think i dont want to still have kids around when im 40 or 50 you know, I have been together with my girl for over a year and probably the first one that i really fell in love with, before her i was bouncing around and always out every night, well now me and my girl been living together for a solid year and just bought big 4 bdrs house together and everything is great... she is expecting a ring pretty soon, but thats a huge thing for me... but then again im not 21 or 22 anymore... halfway through my 20's and coming to 30 fast!
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I got married at 25 and divorced by 28....I'll be 37 in December and I don't predict marriage in the near future, never wanted kids.
 
housemusik83 said:
because you dont want it to happen or just "hasnt" happen yet as in you havent found the right woman?
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Bit of both I guess. I never particularly wanted to reproduce. And it would take a woman with the patience of a saint to put up with me, that's a pretty tall order.
 
i know what you mean bro, thats why i love my girl so much, i put her through so much shit, and sometimes treat her really bad but she still sticks with me and knows how to "deal" with my mental issues
 
housemusik83 said:
i know what you mean bro, thats why i love my girl so much, i put her through so much shit, and sometimes treat her really bad but she still sticks with me and knows how to "deal" with my mental issues
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how does she deal with the fact that you wear a thumb ring???


lolol just kidding bro :verygood:
 
housemusik83 said:
I'm 25 in 2 weeks and im starting to think i dont want to still have kids around when im 40 or 50 you know, I have been together with my girl for over a year and probably the first one that i really fell in love with, before her i was bouncing around and always out every night, well now me and my girl been living together for a solid year and just bought big 4 bdrs house together and everything is great... she is expecting a ring pretty soon, but thats a huge thing for me... but then again im not 21 or 22 anymore... halfway through my 20's and coming to 30 fast!
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Don't do it.
 
Neither my Old Grump and I were EVER going to remarry. So as luck would have it, we did it on our third date. We don't suggest that ya'll try this at home though.

I was married too young first time to a gaping asshole. I was barely 21 when we began dating, married 22. 13 years and 4 kids later I earned a beatdown so I finally sent his ass packing.

I am the Old Grump's SIXTH wife yet he claims regularly that I am the only woman he has ever loved. We were only supposed to have *an arrangement* but he wanted to make me his wife and I accepted his proposal. Even though we've been through a shitstorm of epic proportions our marriage has remained intact over 2 years now. He was 55 when we got married on Halloween 06 and I was 39.

My first husband was a lesson and my last husband is a gift.
 
BIKINIMOM said:
Neither my Old Grump and I were EVER going to remarry. So as luck would have it, we did it on our third date. We don't suggest that ya'll try this at home though.

I was married too young first time to a gaping asshole. I was barely 21 when we began dating, married 22. 13 years and 4 kids later I earned a beatdown so I finally sent his ass packing.

I am the Old Grump's SIXTH wife yet he claims regularly that I am the only woman he has ever loved. We were only supposed to have *an arrangement* but he wanted to make me his wife and I accepted his proposal. Even though we've been through a shitstorm of epic proportions our marriage has remained intact over 2 years now. He was 55 when we got married on Halloween 06 and I was 39.

My first husband was a lesson and my last husband is a gift.
Click to expand...

+1 well put....
 
May I ask why you are thinking to marry *this* girl? Surely it can't be because she puts up with you when you treat her poorly? And I am not ragging on you, brother. I just don't understand why any man would treat his lady poorly, especially if she is a good girl.
 
(note my mental issues) I guess its like this... I used to play hard to get with any girl, and pretty much thought i was better than all of them, becuase in short, i was... I never sweated a girl, never cared because there is about 1,000,000,000,000 girls out there why worry about 1, and that worked out better than good for me, because i would have any girl i ever wanted and than some ( plz dont take me for big conceited because im not)... But this one is different, she puts up with my shit, she cooks my 6 meals (well some days) she is on my level and she looks similar to me witch is a big plus, she is somewhat cool with my job and being out late and partying with me, she is cool with me joocing, and we have been living together for little over a year now, i never lasted this long with one girl, and we are both very faithful people... Im turning 25 soon and just saying, my parents been married for over 40 years and someday i would like to be able to say this... NOT saying marriage is going to happen soon, but if i would consider it with anybody it would defenently be her... (sorry about novel) and didnt want to sound like big head asshole, i do admit i am fucked up up there, but then again who really isnt? :)
 
housemusik83 said:
(note my mental issues) I guess its like this... I used to play hard to get with any girl, and pretty much thought i was better than all of them, becuase in short, i was... I never sweated a girl, never cared because there is about 1,000,000,000,000 girls out there why worry about 1, and that worked out better than good for me, because i would have any girl i ever wanted and than some ( plz dont take me for big conceited because im not)... But this one is different, she puts up with my shit, she cooks my 6 meals (well some days) she is on my level and she looks similar to me witch is a big plus, she is somewhat cool with my job and being out late and partying with me, she is cool with me joocing, and we have been living together for little over a year now, i never lasted this long with one girl, and we are both very faithful people... Im turning 25 soon and just saying, my parents been married for over 30 years and someday i would like to be able to say this... NOT saying marriage is going to happen soon, but if i would consider it with anybody it would defenently be her... (sorry about novel) and didnt want to sound like big head asshole, i do admit i am fucked up up there, but then again who really isnt? :)
Click to expand...
hook set, timr for her to reel you in... :biggrin:
 
it is fun being single and playing the field but it gets old, real old not having that one person there you know, the one that knows you better than anyone, the one that knows what you like to eat and drink, the one you share good laughs with
 
housemusik83 said:
(note my mental issues) I guess its like this... I used to play hard to get with any girl, and pretty much thought i was better than all of them, becuase in short, i was... I never sweated a girl, never cared because there is about 1,000,000,000,000 girls out there why worry about 1, and that worked out better than good for me, because i would have any girl i ever wanted and than some ( plz dont take me for big conceited because im not)... But this one is different, she puts up with my shit, she cooks my 6 meals (well some days) she is on my level and she looks similar to me witch is a big plus, she is somewhat cool with my job and being out late and partying with me, she is cool with me joocing, and we have been living together for little over a year now, i never lasted this long with one girl, and we are both very faithful people... Im turning 25 soon and just saying, my parents been married for over 40 years and someday i would like to be able to say this... NOT saying marriage is going to happen soon, but if i would consider it with anybody it would defenently be her... (sorry about novel) and didnt want to sound like big head asshole, i do admit i am fucked up up there, but then again who really isnt? :)
Click to expand...

Actually there's only about 3,300,000,000 give or take a hundred million. Just sayin...
 
Your attitude towards women is 100% DEAD ON. Too bad so many bright attractive women don't have the same opinion of themselves.

I also feel you on, "the crazy worklife"... not an easy thing for a partner to put up with if they aren't totally secure.

I hope it works out but please bear with a little unsolicited advice:

You get married IMHO for:

1. LIKE
2. RESPECT
3. COMMON LIFE GOALS

NOT LOVE... Love is what happens along the way. You say your parents have been married 40 years? Do they still genuinely like and respect one another? Are they still KIND to one another? If the answer is YES then you ask them what love is I am 100% sure that they will be able to define it. The rest of us are still on the path to hopefully finding out. :)
 
Well my parents never met before their wedding... my mom tells me today she didnt love my dad nor did she want to marry him and just recently fell... but you know 40 some years and 5 healthy boys later... so i know what you mean about love happening along the way :)
 
housemusik83 said:
Well my parents never met before their wedding... my mom tells me today she didnt love my dad nor did she want to marry him and just recently fell... but you know 40 some years and 5 healthy boys later... so i know what you mean about love happening along the way :)
Click to expand...

Ah so the marriage was arranged then? Talk about old-school.

Guess what? I didn't love my husband when I consented to marry him either. How could I? I barely knew him? I REALLY LIKED and RESPECTED HIM and we wanted the same things from life <--- that is why I married him. I didn't full on head-over-heels-I-don't-think-I-could-breathe-again-if-something-happened-to-him LOVE HIM until nearly a year in and even then those feelings are always evolving as life changes us.

People who say they marry for love (which is what I told myself about why I chose my exhusband) are misguided. They marry for sex but aren't capable of articulating that as our society ties one act to the other (love and marriage). So they think that the strong urges and feelings that have are "love"... no such animal.

Love is what people who have seen some life (I don't care what life has brought you, until you have grey hairs and wrinkles you really don't have the same perspectives) experience when they are older and are starting to feel life slipping from them... and they are still KIND to each other.

THAT IS LOVE... or at least that seems to be a more accurate definition from where I am standing. Maybe 20 years from now I may feel differently and that is why I advise people who have such questions to ask people like your parents as I am not best qualified to answer. I am thinkin they KNOW for sure. Me, I am still figurin it out. :)
 
BIKINIMOM said:
Ah so the marriage was arranged then? Talk about old-school.

Guess what? I didn't love my husband when I consented to marry him either. How could I? I barely knew him? I REALLY LIKED and RESPECTED HIM and we wanted the same things from life <--- that is why I married him. I didn't full on head-over-heels-I-don't-think-I-could-breathe-again-if-something-happened-to-him LOVE HIM until nearly a year in and even then those feelings are always evolving as life changes us.

People who say they marry for love (which is what I told myself about why I chose my exhusband) are misguided. They marry for sex but aren't capable of articulating that as our society ties one act to the other (love and marriage). So they think that the strong urges and feelings that have are "love"... no such animal.

Love is what people who have seen some life (I don't care what life has brought you, until you have grey hairs and wrinkles you really don't have the same perspectives) experience when they are older and are starting to feel life slipping from them... and they are still KIND to each other.

THAT IS LOVE... or at least that seems to be a more accurate definition from where I am standing. Maybe 20 years from now I may feel differently and that is why I advise people who have such questions to ask people like your parents as I am not best qualified to answer. I am thinkin they KNOW for sure. Me, I am still figurin it out. :)
Click to expand...

+1 glad we had this talk... you are very well spoken :)
 
housemusik83 said:
+1 glad we had this talk... you are very well spoken :)
Click to expand...

I'm glad if I helped. :)

My husband and I used to have a radiow show about dating and relationships and we co-authored a book bout the same topic. Funny title:

"TRUE LOVE and Flying Purple People Eaters, there just ain't no such animal" :lmao:

Common sense guide to internet dating and relationships.
 
I'm 30 and it's time to have a serious relationship. But marriage is a big NO. Dunno about kids.
 
BIKINIMOM said:
Ah so the marriage was arranged then? Talk about old-school.

Guess what? I didn't love my husband when I consented to marry him either. How could I? I barely knew him? I REALLY LIKED and RESPECTED HIM and we wanted the same things from life <--- that is why I married him. I didn't full on head-over-heels-I-don't-think-I-could-breathe-again-if-something-happened-to-him LOVE HIM until nearly a year in and even then those feelings are always evolving as life changes us.
People who say they marry for love (which is what I told myself about why I chose my exhusband) are misguided. They marry for sex but aren't capable of articulating that as our society ties one act to the other (love and marriage). So they think that the strong urges and feelings that have are "love"... no such animal.

Love is what people who have seen some life (I don't care what life has brought you, until you have grey hairs and wrinkles you really don't have the same perspectives) experience when they are older and are starting to feel life slipping from them... and they are still KIND to each other.

THAT IS LOVE... or at least that seems to be a more accurate definition from where I am standing. Maybe 20 years from now I may feel differently and that is why I advise people who have such questions to ask people like your parents as I am not best qualified to answer. I am thinkin they KNOW for sure. Me, I am still figurin it out. :)
Click to expand...

anyone who says they are in love. . .but lacks some historical perspective. . .is probably full of shit. . .they are merely mistaking lust for love. . .
 
digimon7068 said:
anyone who says they are in love. . .but lacks some historical perspective. . .is probably full of shit. . .they are merely mistaking lust for love. . .
Click to expand...

You my brother and I have the same thought. Marriage is a gift as are children. Those that are of any age that have questions should not breed.
 
housemusik83 said:
Do most of you bros out there said to yourselves... " damn I am getting to that age, maybe i should start settling down, finding a wife, possibly thinking about kids" or maybe not to that extent.... (this questions i rather be answered by the married ones) LOL :p
Click to expand...

don't know, at 37 and never married, my good friend (not GF) of 15 years told me that she was pregnant, that was a pretty good jump start. She was 32, divorced, no kids and I was single and no kids. we decided to go ahead and have the child and deal with the other stuff as it came up. Boy, there was ALOT of other stuff, most of it in court. But after 2 years of fighting in court, we decided to stop[ fighting and she moved in and we parented our son together. After 9 years of living together, we married last year, our son was 10 and was my best man. But, even at 37, I didn't have the feeling that I needed anything other than my good looks and some $$ to make me happy. Little did I know, nothing in the world compares to the love of a child.

Sometimes, inspite of myself, good things happened. And being it's Thanksgiving, for that I am thankful.
 
txbondsman said:
don't know, at 37 and never married, my good friend (not GF) of 15 years told me that she was pregnant, that was a pretty good jump start. She was 32, divorced, no kids and I was single and no kids. we decided to go ahead and have the child and deal with the other stuff as it came up. Boy, there was ALOT of other stuff, most of it in court. But after 2 years of fighting in court, we decided to stop[ fighting and she moved in and we parented our son together. After 9 years of living together, we married last year, our son was 10 and was my best man. But, even at 37, I didn't have the feeling that I needed anything other than my good looks and some $$ to make me happy. Little did I know, nothing in the world compares to the love of a child.

Sometimes, inspite of myself, good things happened. And being it's Thanksgiving, for that I am thankful.
Click to expand...

+1 good shit bro
 
BIKINIMOM said:
You say you aren't sure about wanting children (understandable). But you say that you NEVER want to marry.

The two statements are contradictory.
Click to expand...

Oh really, damn. HUMMM, maybe you need another chapter to your book, unmarried people w/ children.

btw, the "don't try this at home is MY line", I expect royalties now....
 
txbondsman said:
Oh really, damn. HUMMM, maybe you need another chapter to your book, unmarried people w/ children.

btw, the "don't try this at home is MY line", I expect royalties now....
Click to expand...

Why did you marry the mother of your son then? I am not asking you to justify your life choices, you know I lub you.. I just don't understand how someone would be ready to make a lifetime commitment to a child (who is incapable of committing back - no child ASKS to be born) but they would also say that they are incapable or unwilling to commit to an adult who is most certainly capable of giving their consent in return.

It doesn't seem to make sense to me.

A commitment to a child is MUCH more difficult by virtue of the fact that "the other half" does not commit back.
 
txbondsman said:
don't know, at 37 and never married, my good friend (not GF) of 15 years told me that she was pregnant, that was a pretty good jump start. She was 32, divorced, no kids and I was single and no kids. we decided to go ahead and have the child and deal with the other stuff as it came up. Boy, there was ALOT of other stuff, most of it in court. But after 2 years of fighting in court, we decided to stop[ fighting and she moved in and we parented our son together. After 9 years of living together, we married last year, our son was 10 and was my best man. But, even at 37, I didn't have the feeling that I needed anything other than my good looks and some $$ to make me happy. Little did I know, nothing in the world compares to the love of a child.

Sometimes, inspite of myself, good things happened. And being it's Thanksgiving, for that I am thankful.
Click to expand...
+10000

In all the time we have spent talking, I didn't know you are so damn smart, kind and a good guy.

I like to see we think along the same lines.
 
BIKINIMOM said:
Why did you marry the mother of your son then? I am not asking you to justify your life choices, you know I lub you.. I just don't understand how someone would be ready to make a lifetime commitment to a child (who is incapable of committing back - no child ASKS to be born) but they would also say that they are incapable or unwilling to commit to an adult who is most certainly capable of giving their consent in return.

It doesn't seem to make sense to me.

A commitment to a child is MUCH more difficult by virtue of the fact that "the other half" does not commit back.
Click to expand...

I wish you'ld write stuff on a 5th grade level, that way I MAY grasp part of it. My ADD kicked in after "why" but I'll try and answer. I was hoping not to be the selfish asshole I'd been for 46 years, just try and think of someone other than myself for once. Since he didn't ask to be born into this world, my actions were to cement any homelife and parent questions that he may have, other kids can be cruel. As far as his mother goes, you can love someone w/o liking them very much, and that comes and goes, but I do love her, she's just not very likeable at times, I would guess she'd say the same about me. But, all in all, I would do anything to make my son's life as normal and secure as I can, and I think that we've (she and I) have succeded so far. Do I like all the aspects of our relationship? NO. Would any other one be better, maybe, but the grass is always greener, then when you get over there, it's just more grass..... Is that what you meant?

Why don't you just write normal sometimes, and in littler amounts....
 
I dont think it is fair to children not having an idea who their maternal father and mother are... and in this country it seems like it is almost normal not knowing who your real father or mother is... sad
 
yeah, kids at 10 like my son, they start to know who's parents are together and whose aren't, who is the "real" dad and the guy his mommys married to, that sort of thing. We had a lady say something inappropriate in front of my son, he said something to his mom later about it. Right then I knew what was to be done, we were married not long after. like I said, we lived together for 9 years, I'd known her for 15, it was time...
 
dont ever do it...im 29 and going back to where i began 11 years ago...marriage is stupid...kids are chaos...
 
housemusik83 said:
Do most of you bros out there said to yourselves... " damn I am getting to that age, maybe i should start settling down, finding a wife, possibly thinking about kids" or maybe not to that extent.... (this questions i rather be answered by the married ones) LOL :p
Click to expand...

For men. It's the day hot 18 y/o girls stop finding you attractive and start referring to you as 'old'. For every man once they reach this milestone - they now feel old.

r
 
28 here have 2 kids got married when i was 24...Got seperated a year ago and now back together with my wife again
 
hahahaahah i got my 1 year old on just a cutter...

50mg/Tren eod
sus 250mg/ew



My 3 year old is bulking

5000mg Iranian Test/ew
150mg Anadrol/ed
 
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