Please Scroll Down to See Forums Below 
First of all, I want to apologize to all the good bro's I've teased for being afraid to buy supplies in Tijuana. I've been crossing the border at least twice a year for the past ten years, and have never had any problems whatsoever. This led me to assume that bro's who got hassled by the federales or got caught at customs were somehow negligent. Now I know better.
Bear in mind, I'm a middle-aged guy and look like it, and this usually confers some degree of respectibility. Customs never gives me a second look.
I was going to spend Thanksgiving with friends in San Diego, so I decided to take the opportunity to make a quick run for the border first thing in the morning, be in and out and avoid the crowds. I figured 90minutes tops. Including clearing customs.
I didn't have time to shop for prices, so I purchased three bottles of Denkal var at the granero closest to the border. Popped all the little peach pills in zip lock and hid it on my body. I then walked up the street to my favorite farmacia and found that the had 2% Nizoral (lemyken brand) for less then $5. so I stocked up and bought 6. I also bought six boxes each of clomid and tamoxifin. (BTW was disappointed to see that the nolvadex brand of tam was going for nearly $1/tab. I asked if the had anything cheaper and they came up with a brand in a red/white box where the 20mb tabs were about .40/tab.)
That's an awful lot of tabs to pop, so I decided to hold off and do it at the bus station. As I was approaching Revolucion, a young fed stopped me and demanded to look in my bag, then got irate because I don't speak english. An english speaking fed arrived soon and I explained that the bag contained nothing but shampoo and drugs to help my non-existant wife get pregnant. The bag was admittedly pretty full of stuff, which prompted them to keep shouting "too many, too many!"
When I go to TJ, I always carry cash in my sock, but by this time I had already spent nearly $300 on var and $120 on farmacia goodies, so I didn't bother sticking what little money I had left in my sock.
I was extremely polite, but stood firm that the drugs they had found in the bag were not narcotics or otherwise illegal to possess. (I was confident they couldn't find the var. ) Anyway, when it became obvious I wan't going to be shaken down, they put me in their car and drove around for about 30 minutes, (seemed like hours), then pulled into an alley and did a thorough body search. They even made me drop trow, (no cavity search)but I figured they were just trying to intimidate me. They kept saying they were going to take me to see a judge, and I kept say, fine, let's go, I've done nothing illegal here. Then two, count 'em, two, more police cars pulled up and they all had a look at me. They never actually illicted a bribe, and never even hinted at me paying a fine right there, which they had done years when a cop claimed I had run a red light.
Finally they got tired of fucking around and getting nowhere, so they did another body search and this time came up with a foil ball containing powder. I nearly shit my pants. I never imagined they would steep so low as to actually plant drugs on me. Visions of Turkish prisons flashed before my eyes, and for the first time in my life, I actually felt my legs shaking.
Finally I remembered that I had already spent most of my money (duh!), so I opened my wallet and offered up all of about $50. They started screaming $50 is nothing! so I pointed out that's all I had. They took the money and told me to get my ass back across the border ASAP or they'd arrest me again. And they let me keep my bag of goodies.
I needed to calm down, so I walked back to the granero and told them what had happened. They went fucking apeshit, saying this shit was ruining their business and the owner was friends with the police commisioner. Anyway, I chilled out by spending the next 20 minutes in their bathroom popping all those pills out of their packages, then hid them with the var. This was about noon on Thanksgiving, so I was able to walk through the border without any wait.
First lesson, don't walk around TJ with a heaping bag from a farmacia. Might as well have painted a target on my back. Hide everything on your person before leaving the store. Many farmacias will let you use their restroom for this.
Find a better place than your socks or shorts to hide you money and gear. These assholes did a fairly thorough search and if I'd hidden anything in either place they would have found it.
I love visiting Mexico and will surely do it again soon. But next time I'm not gonna be so cocky about it.
Thanks for letting me get this off my chest.
Bear in mind, I'm a middle-aged guy and look like it, and this usually confers some degree of respectibility. Customs never gives me a second look.
I was going to spend Thanksgiving with friends in San Diego, so I decided to take the opportunity to make a quick run for the border first thing in the morning, be in and out and avoid the crowds. I figured 90minutes tops. Including clearing customs.
I didn't have time to shop for prices, so I purchased three bottles of Denkal var at the granero closest to the border. Popped all the little peach pills in zip lock and hid it on my body. I then walked up the street to my favorite farmacia and found that the had 2% Nizoral (lemyken brand) for less then $5. so I stocked up and bought 6. I also bought six boxes each of clomid and tamoxifin. (BTW was disappointed to see that the nolvadex brand of tam was going for nearly $1/tab. I asked if the had anything cheaper and they came up with a brand in a red/white box where the 20mb tabs were about .40/tab.)
That's an awful lot of tabs to pop, so I decided to hold off and do it at the bus station. As I was approaching Revolucion, a young fed stopped me and demanded to look in my bag, then got irate because I don't speak english. An english speaking fed arrived soon and I explained that the bag contained nothing but shampoo and drugs to help my non-existant wife get pregnant. The bag was admittedly pretty full of stuff, which prompted them to keep shouting "too many, too many!"
When I go to TJ, I always carry cash in my sock, but by this time I had already spent nearly $300 on var and $120 on farmacia goodies, so I didn't bother sticking what little money I had left in my sock.
I was extremely polite, but stood firm that the drugs they had found in the bag were not narcotics or otherwise illegal to possess. (I was confident they couldn't find the var. ) Anyway, when it became obvious I wan't going to be shaken down, they put me in their car and drove around for about 30 minutes, (seemed like hours), then pulled into an alley and did a thorough body search. They even made me drop trow, (no cavity search)but I figured they were just trying to intimidate me. They kept saying they were going to take me to see a judge, and I kept say, fine, let's go, I've done nothing illegal here. Then two, count 'em, two, more police cars pulled up and they all had a look at me. They never actually illicted a bribe, and never even hinted at me paying a fine right there, which they had done years when a cop claimed I had run a red light.
Finally they got tired of fucking around and getting nowhere, so they did another body search and this time came up with a foil ball containing powder. I nearly shit my pants. I never imagined they would steep so low as to actually plant drugs on me. Visions of Turkish prisons flashed before my eyes, and for the first time in my life, I actually felt my legs shaking.
Finally I remembered that I had already spent most of my money (duh!), so I opened my wallet and offered up all of about $50. They started screaming $50 is nothing! so I pointed out that's all I had. They took the money and told me to get my ass back across the border ASAP or they'd arrest me again. And they let me keep my bag of goodies.
I needed to calm down, so I walked back to the granero and told them what had happened. They went fucking apeshit, saying this shit was ruining their business and the owner was friends with the police commisioner. Anyway, I chilled out by spending the next 20 minutes in their bathroom popping all those pills out of their packages, then hid them with the var. This was about noon on Thanksgiving, so I was able to walk through the border without any wait.
First lesson, don't walk around TJ with a heaping bag from a farmacia. Might as well have painted a target on my back. Hide everything on your person before leaving the store. Many farmacias will let you use their restroom for this.
Find a better place than your socks or shorts to hide you money and gear. These assholes did a fairly thorough search and if I'd hidden anything in either place they would have found it.
I love visiting Mexico and will surely do it again soon. But next time I'm not gonna be so cocky about it.
Thanks for letting me get this off my chest.
...
