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10 Things You Might Not Know About Me

Dakotah said:
1. I get insanely jealous easy. I tend to be insecure.
2. I have superlow self esteem. I pretend to be happy with myself because its been my way ever since i can remember.
3. I am super needy emotionally. I love to be loved and hugged and kissed.
4. I hate the thought of having a child myself one day - I would rather adopt a child between the ages of 4 and older than have one physically of my own.
5. I have social anxiety to where i leave a room and shake something feirce unless i have a focus point.
6. I have been taken advantage of by 3 men in my family and a few outside- I felt like it was my fault every single time so i push it out of mind until i start remembering again.
7. I love my family even the ones who hurt me.
8. I tend to be gullible and think the better of people even if the have a past of being negative. I try to see the better anyways. I always want to be liked by everyone.
9. When i get angry - i have horrible rage problems and lash out maniacly. I have even attempted to kill my exhusband too many times to even remember. i came within a inch of stabbing him with the largest knife i could find and had him cornered and turned it a little and stuck it in the wall next to him he freaked and didnt come home for a while.
10. I have broken one of my dogs legs and never took it to the vet and I have killed a puppy before because I was on drugs and thought it wasnt eating and I hurt it so bad that it was having seizures and took it to have it put down- i never told anyone.
11. I have a problem with self mutilation - I havent hurt myself in a year.
12. I always find someone else i want to be like and never like myself.
13. I am sparatically able to stick up for myself even when i am getting screwed over.
14. I tend to cling to a man super fast.
15. my first relationship was with a woman.
16. I tend to be really lazy.
17. I love attention.
18. I like pain from tattoos, peircings, and skin mutilation.
19. I have done something so horrible I will never tell anyone what I did.
20. I have the worst time making up my mind.

A great percentage of those sound like my current girlfriend. It took balls to type some of that stuff. I gotta give you credit. It seems as if you are on a better path right now. :)
 
Dakotah said:
1. I get insanely jealous easy. I tend to be insecure.
2. I have superlow self esteem. I pretend to be happy with myself because its been my way ever since i can remember.
3. I am super needy emotionally. I love to be loved and hugged and kissed.
4. I hate the thought of having a child myself one day - I would rather adopt a child between the ages of 4 and older than have one physically of my own.
5. I have social anxiety to where i leave a room and shake something feirce unless i have a focus point.
6. I have been taken advantage of by 3 men in my family and a few outside- I felt like it was my fault every single time so i push it out of mind until i start remembering again.
7. I love my family even the ones who hurt me.
8. I tend to be gullible and think the better of people even if the have a past of being negative. I try to see the better anyways. I always want to be liked by everyone.
9. When i get angry - i have horrible rage problems and lash out maniacly. I have even attempted to kill my exhusband too many times to even remember. i came within a inch of stabbing him with the largest knife i could find and had him cornered and turned it a little and stuck it in the wall next to him he freaked and didnt come home for a while.
10. I have broken one of my dogs legs and never took it to the vet and I have killed a puppy before because I was on drugs and thought it wasnt eating and I hurt it so bad that it was having seizures and took it to have it put down- i never told anyone.
11. I have a problem with self mutilation - I havent hurt myself in a year.
12. I always find someone else i want to be like and never like myself.
13. I am sparatically able to stick up for myself even when i am getting screwed over.
14. I tend to cling to a man super fast.
15. my first relationship was with a woman.
16. I tend to be really lazy.
17. I love attention.
18. I like pain from tattoos, peircings, and skin mutilation.
19. I have done something so horrible I will never tell anyone what I did.
20. I have the worst time making up my mind.


21. has a fabulous body
23. is fun to have around
24. has a bf who loves her and is the envy of all EF

just let somebody else do the cooking. :) :rose: :p
 
marshallmadman said:
A great percentage of those sound like my current girlfriend. It took balls to type some of that stuff. I gotta give you credit. It seems as if you are on a better path right now. :)
True, D. That took some guts. If I could hug you I would. If I could steal you away from DEV... :evil:
 
Griz1 said:
1. I had consenual sexual relations with someone in my immediate family.
2. I beat some guy so completely bad with my fists 20 years ago that he's a complete vegetable. (I live with that every day of my life).
3. I had sex with two of my girlfriend's mothers before I was 25
4. I did something so horrible, that if I were to ever tell, I'd likely be doing big time, real time prison.
5. I can pick damn near any lock that's not a Medico, or better in under 2 minutes.
6. I still play revenge fantasies in my head like movie reels.
7. I like anything that's essentially "forbidden knowledge"
8. I spent my youth reading encyclopedias and waltzed through university without cracking a book.
9. I saw the error of my ways 15 years ago and am now a good person and will always be (I hope). I regret so many things in my life it pains me.
10. Despite my arguments for the legalization of drugs (rec), I actually haven't done them in 20 years or more.

If numbers 1-4 are even remotley true, have a nice time burning in hell.
 
mekannik said:
10) 4 years after breaking up with my first true love - I drove 500 miles to NYC to her apartment party. Looked into her eyes and fell in love all over again. Then drove 500 miles back 4 hours later.

What happened??

curious because this sounds like something i would do
 
hairlossguru said:
If numbers 1-4 are even remotley true, have a nice time burning in hell.

Nice support group we got goin' in here... :rolleyes:
 
hairlossguru said:
If numbers 1-4 are even remotley true, have a nice time burning in hell.

Hey, none of that on this thread. There's probably other people here with the same deal, just no balls to admit it.
 
1- This is only my 2nd EF post even though I've been following this site for the last few years.
2- my best friend died in a jet skiing accident when I was 18 and I didn't know untill 10 months later because I was abroad.
3- The only people in the world I hate is anyone who would purposly hurt a child.
4- I'm in love with my wife but I keep falling in love with my first love every time I see her again.
5- Miami is my favorite city in the world (spent 7 years there up till 03)
6- I have killed 3 people, 2 were by mistake.
7- I care about animals more than I care about most people.
8- My son is the most Amazing gift god has given me.
9- I miss the 1990s like hell.
10- WTF?? Am I the only AY-raab on the EF forums? :whatever:
 
Dial_tone said:
Hey, none of that on this thread. There's probably other people here with the same deal, just no balls to admit it.


I agree





thanks by the way DT for the sweet post you made further up the page :heart: Also thank you to Ender for the sweet post following shortly after.


in another note I have to say that it takes alot of guts for anyone to post on this thread and admit some dirt or even some positive. Everyone has some ugly in their past, if they say they dont then they are not telling the whole truth; it doesnt have to be something so out there but it is still something they will never forget. I could have made that list longer than 20 believe me I could keep going and It would just get uglier but what would be the point- like a few have said I am happy and in a better place and became a much better woman on the inside thanks to myself and a special man.
 
dugie65 said:
What happened??

curious because this sounds like something i would do


Fell in love again. Started a long distance relationship for a short time. But found that we had both changed/matured/corrupted quite a bit. The expression "you can never go home again" was very apropos.


But I would gladly drive out again tomorrow to fall into those eyes one more time...
 
Griz1 said:
Thanks for the support guys/gals. But he is right, likely I will burn in hell. I just hope I can do enough to trade my ticket in for purgatory or something.

Life is about growing, learing, and moving on. Pay no attention to the bible beaters....


There are so many things I would take back if I could, and the mere thought of them prevents me from repeating the same mistakes.



Dial Tone You da' Man!
 
1. I cheated my way through high school and skipped about half my classes, but everyone thought I was a great student.

2. I was extremely shy until I got out of high school.

3. I only have one "real" friend.

4. I'm a completely different person around my family. I'm afraid they won't accept the real me.

5. I used to be a small-time thief. I would steal anything I could get my hands on if I knew I wouldn't get caught.

6. I'm obsessed with money and being successful.

7. I used to be into gymnastics...I even took ballet classes. I can still do side and front splits.

8. I don't respect women, not even my wife. I'm working on this.

9. I tried out for the Arizona Rattlers (AFL) last year.

10. I can't stand the heat. If it's over 65 degrees I'm miserable.
 
Griz1 said:
Thanks for the support guys/gals. But he is right, likely I will burn in hell. I just hope I can do enough to trade my ticket in for purgatory or something.


In regards to your #1...which member was it?
 
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1. I weighed 135 @ 5'-8" in highschool.

2. I grew up in the country with noone to play with.

3. I use to draw naked cartoon girls to masturbate to (pre-porn).

4. I fall in love easily if the girl is compatible.

5. I broke 5 teeth out, a thumb and nose all in one fight.

6. I have stripped all the way down for a girl and her 55 yr old mom once.

7. I have tried several different drugs only once.

8. I have been to jail before (DUI).

9. I have never had a one night stand.

10. I have cried over breakups before.
 
Us humans sure are a fucked up lot LOL.

Just think .. every single person in the world has a list like this.. and yet we still judge.. knowing we all do very immoral things.
 
11. I was conceived before my parents were married
12. They are still married to this day
13. I still want my Aston Martin Lagonda
14. I am weird when it comes to money
 
11. Sledded across the freeway during snow storms in dallas.
12. 40 of my friends fought in a gang fight over me because some out of town dudes kicked my butt
13. in the 8th grade we use to shoot arrows(real arrows) at each other and try to evade them
14. I had sex in the 5th grade(never believed in cooties)
15. I fondled my dad's secretary when I was 14 and she was 28. She pretended she was asleep.
16. Been to jail 5 or 6 times(lost count)
17. Been chased by a helicopter when i was riding my RM125 in a field.
18. Shot a 6 mm rifle off in my house when I was cleaning it(it woke everybody up)
19. Almost shot my grandfather with a 22 when I was 9.
20. My folks are divorced.
 
12. From the neck down my girlfriends body looks identicle to Mr Blacks avatar (with a few added tattoos and nipples peirced of course)

okay she is a little more muscular.. ahs to add that after looking more closely at her arms and abs..
 
1. I tend to be conservative.

2. I got my first tattoo at 15 yrs old

3. I was raped by two guys when I was 14

4. I have a degree in counseling

5. I was a tomboy in jr high and beat up the captian of the high school football team when we were in 6th grade.

6. I am a certified personal trainer but to shy to use it to the full potential

7. I am a "real" blonde

8. I have a very wild dirty kinky side to me sexually.

9. I have been married for almost 14 yrs

10. Have 3 beautiful daughters
 
Wow reading all these lists and having posted my own makes me realize how little most people even those whom I consider close friends know about me.

Cheers,
Scotsman
 
1) I am 1/8 French.

2) Although I am in my mid-20's, the youngest woman I have ever been with is 37.

3) I am the youngest of 8 children, which may explain #1.

4) Somebody once tried to frame me for attempted murder.

5) I have been told by every woman I've been with and virtually any that I meet that I have one of the sexiest voices they have ever heard. I am also routinely told by women that I have a very sexy smile. I think these women need hearing aids and glasses.

6) I have been helping disabled and elderly individuals for many years now because I enjoy doing something meaningful and fighting for the little guys, rejected and loners.

7) I have no post-secondary school degrees.

8) I speak three languages.

9) I once fell asleep at the wheel while driving to the US on the highway. Long story short, I ended up detained at US customs and they barred me from entering the US for 5 years. I went through hell to clear things up, though I am still on the "system".

10) Family means everything to me, and I am truly blessed to have an amazing one. I have very few close friends because I am horrible at keeping in contact with others.
 
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Dakotah said:
I agree





thanks by the way DT for the sweet post you made further up the page :heart: Also thank you to Ender for the sweet post following shortly after.


in another note I have to say that it takes alot of guts for anyone to post on this thread and admit some dirt or even some positive. Everyone has some ugly in their past, if they say they dont then they are not telling the whole truth; it doesnt have to be something so out there but it is still something they will never forget. I could have made that list longer than 20 believe me I could keep going and It would just get uglier but what would be the point- like a few have said I am happy and in a better place and became a much better woman on the inside thanks to myself and a special man.

Red Karma hey.....It's funny that you and FROM Zero were the ONLY ones to give me red karma, however I recieved 5 green karma hits and 2 PM's telling me it was a great post.

However that is beside the point. He mentioned that he beat a guy into a vegitative state for life, AND THEN, commented that he'd done MUCH WORSE!

That leads me to believe that he either raped a girl, killed somebody, or tortures puppy dogs. What could possibly be worse than beating somebody into a bed-ridden vegtable?? Please answer me this and I'll never come to the Chat board again!! Oh ya..........and forgot to mention that GRIZ agreed with me!!!!!!!!!!!

On a more posative note, Pitbull has the most intelligent post here yet. Life is about learning from your mistakes and growing from them. Not about fearing the bible thumping preachers. God knows I have made many mistakes. But I've never permanentley disabled someone, and then came onto an internet chat board to seek sanctuary.

That speeks volumes about your character. The post I made was not meant as a flame, however just a gut reaction that I realize that I should have kept to myself.
 
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From a Christians point of view(even though I am not that good of one) . Nobody should ever judge another person's soul as far as them going to hell or not. That is totally up to God. I was guilty of this because I wanted Hitler to go to Hell when I was growing up. I didn't think he should ever be saved due to his horenous crimes against the Jews. I know that was wrong of me to thing that now. The hell that poster is going through now is his memories.
 
hairlossguru said:
Red Karma hey.....It's funny that you and FROM Zero were the ONLY ones to give me red karma, however I recieved 5 green karma hits and 2 PM's telling me it was a great post.

What about those of us who gave you green but included disapproving karma messages?
 
this thread is full of shit from people that they probably don't really type or say too often.. brining negativity into it sucks and just reduces the chances of these people ever being open again.
 
Lestat said:
this thread is full of shit from people that they probably don't really type or say too often.. brining negativity into it sucks and just reduces the chances of these people ever being open again.

Amen. That is exactly the kind of b.s. that turns a lot of good threads bad.
 
hairlossguru said:
Red Karma hey.....It's funny that you and FROM Zero were the ONLY ones to give me red karma, however I recieved 5 green karma hits and 2 PM's telling me it was a great post.

However that is beside the point. He mentioned that he beat a guy into a vegitative state for life, AND THEN, commented that he'd done MUCH WORSE!

That leads me to believe that he either raped a girl, killed somebody, or tortures puppy dogs. What could possibly be worse than beating somebody into a bed-ridden vegtable?? Please answer me this and I'll never come to the Chat board again!! Oh ya..........and forgot to mention that GRIZ agreed with me!!!!!!!!!!!

On a more posative note, Pitbull has the most intelligent post here yet. Life is about learning from your mistakes and growing from them. Not about fearing the bible thumping preachers. God knows I have made many mistakes. But I've never permanentley disabled someone, and then came onto an internet chat board to seek sanctuary.

That speeks volumes about your character. The post I made was not meant as a flame, however just a gut reaction that I realize that I should have kept to myself.


call it what you want buddy but im sure others had gut reactions to other posts before GRIZ's, and they didnt post their negative - so hows about this dont leave chat because some woman told you off, and just keep your negative outbursts to yourself !!!!!!
As far as him hurting someone so bad they are vegatative -- guess what! I never saw him posting that he was happy he did it or that he doesnt live with it everyday!!!!!! Also guess what! he and every other person in the world who has done something that bad or even similiar in relation has to live what they did.
All I am saying is there were plenty of posts on this thread and no one else posted negative about somebody elses post that i can think of off hand. I like seeing people post and being honest - they arent creating this madeup person just to talk and have friends - it is them.
But I will say that I do like seeing others posts where they admit they arent perfect also, it lets you see who you are talking to in a way. No one is perfect!!!!
Enough said I will leave it at that. Dont bother replying to my post cause im so not interested in what you have to say!!!!!!!! :heart:
 
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Lestat said:
this thread is full of shit from people that they probably don't really type or say too often.. brining negativity into it sucks and just reduces the chances of these people ever being open again.

No shit. This thread has probably been very theraputic for so many people. I know it was for me. If you're feeling shitty about something or someone, bring it up in a non-confrotational or judging way and it may help you feel better.
 
strangebrew said:
2. I was extremely shy until I got out of high school.

...

6. I'm obsessed with money and being successful.

...

10. I can't stand the heat. If it's over 65 degrees I'm miserable.


Add those to my list...
 
1: Growing up I always wanted to be a test pilot, then an astronaut.
2: I was captain and all-state in football, baseball and wrestling in my Military H.S.
3: I got kicked off the football my senior year as captain for going off on the coach for nearly a full quarter.
4: I talk to my Mother, Father and brother more than anyone else in my life. i am terrible about keeping in touch.
5: I went from being a total extrovert to be fairly shy now and quiet until I get to know you.
6: I spend more time with my co-workers than I do with anything else in my life.
7: I have an extremely bad temper when provoked but it takes a LOT to set me off now.
8: I played hockey for 15 years up to Junior b's.
9: I am one of the most competetive people in the world and hate to lose at anything. Losing affects me for weeks, I am very hard on myself.
10: Apparently, I am also one of the moodiest people in the world or so I am told. Usually it is because of me, people rarely get me mad anymore.

11: Damn at 10 already.
 
10. Real antisocial and when i am talking to most people all i am thinking about is how to end the conversation so i can space out again. if someone touches me or compliments me in a nice way, im not really rude about it but i dont like it and am unlikely to return it

9. I'm still a virgin (obviously)

8. lifting and wrestling is the only thing i ever/have ever given maximum effort to, and even then i have my moments of extreme lazyness

7. I hate school so much that after holidays (periods of time off from school fo ra week or more) i tear (no sobbing just tears that tricle) myself to sleep the night before.- and after each summer break i enter a period of intense depression for at least a month

6. (kinda taken from superrices nightmare thing) - i have a nightmare at least once a week about me being chased- and each time its bys omething different and i run through a different piece of my life and see people from different situations. for example on monday night i was being chased by a huge dog that kept turning into a person through my old house when i used to live in Tx. its a really stressfull dream eachtime

5. I probably masturbate too much

4. i love comedies and action movies where cool stuff happens and ends with bondin gand understanding- makes me feel peaceful- (ex: harold and kumar go to white castle, and fight club)

3. iv played computer games since early middle school and spend way too much time online- probably ruined my chance for a personality since iv spent all of my developmental stages playing games

2. i like and trust alot more people iv "met" online than people i see every day in person

1. even tho they annoy me sometimes i love my family and few friends more than anything, and would do whatever they needed from me, probably if it ruinned my life in the process
 
At about 14 years old I was walking towards my friends house on a quiet street. He was waiting for me just up the hill, I could see him while walking. I was in the street next to the parked cars minding my own business and closing in... A car was coming down the street with about 4 or 5 kids in there. They looked about Seniors in HS age. I noticed one of them looked familiar from school but did'nt know him.

This one kid was out the car window waist high and SPIT right in my face as the car passed me. They (or HE) started laughing very hard as they kept going. I had no idea what happend or why. Maybe because I was a loser... who knows? I Definately did'nt bother anyone. I was 130 pounds and over 6ft tall. lol I had to fight to stop from tearing. When I got to the top of the block where my friend was, all he said was "fuck them... they're assholes." That surprisingly was all I needed to hear, to reassure me that I was'nt the one with the problem.

I'm 6ft 3 and 250 pounds now at my heaviest and I remember the guy who did it. He's a small dude, small meaning very short and if I ever do see him I won't do anything to him but think of how easily I could break him in two.


I still see the guy's face so cleary. 22 years later.
 
gonelifting said:
At about 14 years old I was walking towards my friends house on a quiet street. He was waiting for me just up the hill, I could see him while walking. I was in the street next to the parked cars minding my own business and closing in... A car was coming down the street with about 4 or 5 kids in there. They looked about Seniors in HS age. I noticed one of them looked familiar from school but did'nt know him.

This one kid was out the car window waist high and SPIT right in my face as the car passed me. They (or HE) started laughing very hard as they kept going. I had no idea what happend or why. Maybe because I was a loser... who knows? I Definately did'nt bother anyone. I was 130 pounds and over 6ft tall. lol I had to fight to stop from tearing. When I got to the top of the block where my friend was, all he said was "fuck them... they're assholes." That surprisingly was all I needed to hear, to reassure me that I was'nt the one with the problem.

I'm 6ft 3 and 250 pounds now at my heaviest and I remember the guy who did it. He's a small dude, small meaning very short and if I ever do see him I won't do anything to him but think of how easily I could break him in two.


I still see the guy's face so cleary. 22 years later.







Damn


I was 12 and got jumped by these high school kids (they were pissed cause my dad had broke one of their cousins noses..well most of his face really...for throwing a snowball and hitting my mom in the head when she was pregnant)

They beat the crap out of me. But I rembered this one fat fuck wasnt satisfied, pissed on me afterwards. I couldnt even move. Felt it, but didnt even put together what it was till later, couldnt focus.


So flash forward 16 years and Im getting a demolition estimate for a factory building I want to knock down for the land. And Im taking this guy around the site and he keeps looking at me weird, and finally says you don't remember me do you. And I'm trying to figure out how I know him, but I get it a lot so more out of I hoep this sint someone Im supposed to know blah blah.

Then he tells me his name. And I remember who he is, still a fat fuck. I don't know how long after I left it took him to wake up and crawl away, but it wasnt anytime soon.


And I returned the favor
,
 
11. When I was in grade school, I switched school in grade 4 and knew no one at the new school. One day, I beat up the most popular kid in the class because he was making fun of me. That caused the whole school (or so it seemed) to avoid me for the entire year. I almost failed the grade because of it.

Imagine it, a new kid in school and the ONLY people who would talk to him or give him the time of day were the teachers. I eventually stopped going outside for recess because no one would play with me and avoided me.

From time to time, when I'm by myself in a crowd or a party, I still remember what it felt like to be alone for the year.

On the good side, that time was spent spending more time with my brother. On the bad side, it was the beginning of the "life is cheap" belief and that "everyone is expendable".

In grade 5, a similiar thing happened. Except for two changes. One, I played alot of D&D with the 'less then popular' crowd, so this time I had (at least) some allies. Two, when the popular guy started making fun of me again, I beat him again, except this time, I used a metal swing against his head. He went down like a ton of bricks and the teacher on duty had to break it up. I almost went to juvi because of it.

Flash forward to grade 12. One of the kids in the grade 4 class was in my grade 12 class. Her brother died from cancer in the year.

I can still remember her first day back after the funeral.
I can still remember laughing at her because her brother died.
I can still remember sneaking in the graveyard and smashing her brother's tombstone twice (once they repaired it).
I can still remember her crying that year, because I would do my best to make fun of her dead brother every chance I saw her. I wasn't the small kid anymore and was bigger and stronger then any of her friends.

Today, normally, I'll think about it now and realize how terrible that was and now she must of felt. I'll think that I'd never want that on anyone no matter what they did and feel ashamed for doing what I did to her.

However, sometimes, not often, but sometimes, I think about it and smile.
 
11 - I have had someone kill themselves over me.

12 - I have had more sex than you can possibly imagine, but never had have a three way.

13 - I pay for my neighbors son to attend a private school.

14 - When I was into hunting, my best friend and I would steal every single deer stand we came across. Spotting deer was secondary to spotting an empty deer stand. And if we couldn't steal it (permanent built), we tore it up.

15 - Going through college classmates and professors called me a gigilo. Because I was attending the best parties around town, dining out every single night and keeping upscale company that gave me ridiculously expensive gifts. I was the only person they knew of living in a $800 a month apartment (cheap) with two paintings on the walls that were worth over 350K each.

16 - An acquaintance and I unsuspectingly came into a very large sum of cash money two years ago. Since the owner was not going to be coming back around ever again, we kept it. A person here on EF actually gave me detailed instructions on how to get it taken care of and leave no paper trail behind.

17 - I have had a crush/lust/longing for/on someone for the past 6 years. We exchange 4-20 emails per day. We have never missed a day in 6 years. I know every single thing about this person. Everything. You name it, I know it. And he knows everything about me. He knows more about me than my own partner does. Yet, I have never met this man in real life. We have had about 4 phone calls in the entire 6 years of knowing each other. In the beginning when I was single, he would invite me to visit and I never seemed to have the time, which makes me wonder to this day "what if...." He has even invited me to visit (non-sexual) ever since I met my current partner. But I had to say no, because I knew if I did go visit then chances are I would never leave. Because he is one of "those types" of people who come into your life and you simply never let go of.

I have made arrangements to meet this man for the first time this September.

18 - Other than my mother and father, I have never associated with any of my other relatives. Uncles, aunts, cousins, etc... I have no use or words for them. If they all dropped dead all at once, I would not even blink an eye. I would secretly be happy. There is a legitimate reason for this as well.

19 - I went swimming in a clay hole with some other guys from school once and one of them drowned. When the crews arrived and decided to drag the lake to retrieve the body, the hook that was dragging along the bottom actually went through his mouth and came out the bottom of his jaw/neck. His body was winched out of the lake like that while his mother was looking. I was watching the preacher who walked over and patted her head while she was kneeling over the body and then he looked at someone else and just casually shrugged his shoulders. This was the first impression of the entire Religion Career. Then later, I had dated and fucked so many preachers/priests/pastors of all religions but three (Islam, Buddha, Amish) and I can tell you the same attitude is prevelant in every single one of them.

20 - I got dibs on freeballin's silverware when he gets killed by his inmate penpal's outside-bitch.
 
1. the longest time i've had between a relationship since i was 14 is 2 weeks (even after my wife left me)
2. i've had terrible headaches since i was aboot 3 yrs old
3. i lost my dad over $100,000 in the stock market in september of 2000
4. i half attempted suicide from #3 by swallowing over 30 "t-3" (codeines)
5. i have only really cheated on one significant other (my ex-wife) and regret it almost every day
6. i hold grudges against no one and can only stay mad at someone for a couple of hours tops
7. i rarely studied the 6 yrs i went to college and maintained a 3.5 gpa
8. material items have no real meaning to me ( i do appreciate photos and the home i live in though)
9. i am chairman for my state of a certain powerlifting federation
10. my dick hangs to the left :worried:
 
EnderJE said:
I can still remember her crying that year, because I would do my best to make fun of her dead brother every chance I saw her. /QUOTE]

Dude. No offense -- but that's pretty fucked up.
 
Devastation said:
1. the longest time i've had between a relationship since i was 14 is 2 weeks (even after my wife left me)
2. i've had terrible headaches since i was aboot 3 yrs old
3. i lost my dad over $100,000 in the stock market in september of 2000
4. i half attempted suicide from #3 by swallowing over 30 "t-3" (codeines)
5. i have only really cheated on one significant other (my ex-wife) and regret it almost every day
6. i hold grudges against no one and can only stay mad at someone for a couple of hours tops
7. i rarely studied the 6 yrs i went to college and maintained a 3.5 gpa
8. material items have no real meaning to me ( i do appreciate photos and the home i live in though)
9. i am chairman for my state of a certain powerlifting federation
10. my dick hangs to the left :worried:


10: Does Dakotah sleep on the left side of you?
Just curious. ;)
 
EnderJE said:
11. When I was in grade school, I switched school in grade 4 and knew no one at the new school. One day, I beat up the most popular kid in the class because he was making fun of me. That caused the whole school (or so it seemed) to avoid me for the entire year. I almost failed the grade because of it.

Imagine it, a new kid in school and the ONLY people who would talk to him or give him the time of day were the teachers. I eventually stopped going outside for recess because no one would play with me and avoided me.

From time to time, when I'm by myself in a crowd or a party, I still remember what it felt like to be alone for the year.

On the good side, that time was spent spending more time with my brother. On the bad side, it was the beginning of the "life is cheap" belief and that "everyone is expendable".

In grade 5, a similiar thing happened. Except for two changes. One, I played alot of D&D with the 'less then popular' crowd, so this time I had (at least) some allies. Two, when the popular guy started making fun of me again, I beat him again, except this time, I used a metal swing against his head. He went down like a ton of bricks and the teacher on duty had to break it up. I almost went to juvi because of it.

Flash forward to grade 12. One of the kids in the grade 4 class was in my grade 12 class. Her brother died from cancer in the year.

I can still remember her first day back after the funeral.
I can still remember laughing at her because her brother died.
I can still remember sneaking in the graveyard and smashing her brother's tombstone twice (once they repaired it).
I can still remember her crying that year, because I would do my best to make fun of her dead brother every chance I saw her. I wasn't the small kid anymore and was bigger and stronger then any of her friends.

Today, normally, I'll think about it now and realize how terrible that was and now she must of felt. I'll think that I'd never want that on anyone no matter what they did and feel ashamed for doing what I did to her.

However, sometimes, not often, but sometimes, I think about it and smile.

So, one second you realize how terrible it was, and then you smile about it? WTF
 
Razorguns said:
EnderJE said:
I can still remember her crying that year, because I would do my best to make fun of her dead brother every chance I saw her. /QUOTE]

Dude. No offense -- but that's pretty fucked up.

I agree. It's people like him who give me the impression that everyone on the internet is fucking crazy.
 
Gymgurl said:
1. I tend to be conservative.

2. I got my first tattoo at 15 yrs old

3. I was raped by two guys when I was 14

4. I have a degree in counseling

5. I was a tomboy in jr high and beat up the captian of the high school football team when we were in 6th grade.

6. I am a certified personal trainer but to shy to use it to the full potential

7. I am a "real" blonde

8. I have a very wild dirty kinky side to me sexually.

9. I have been married for almost 14 yrs

10. Have 3 beautiful daughters
I love you gymgurl
this almost made me cry
 
Ahhh thanks Soklue...it all makes us who we are today and things that don't kill us makes us stronger!
 
Gymgurl said:
Ahhh thanks Soklue...it all makes us who we are today and things that don't kill us makes us stronger!
yup, similar things have happened to me but you are way stronger than me to talk about them:) I admire u for it and you wlll recover nicely
 
AAP said:
16 - An acquaintance and I unsuspectingly came into a very large sum of cash money two years ago. Since the owner was not going to be coming back around ever again, we kept it. A person here on EF actually gave me detailed instructions on how to get it taken care of and leave no paper trail behind..


Just how much $$$ you talkin about? ;)
 
Dont bother replying to my post cause im so not interested in what you have to say!!!!!!!!

Well then consider this a reply to all of you who responded with red karma. :rolleyes:
I was gonna leave this alone, but its just waaaay too sensative of a topic....

About 6 years ago a friend of mine was partying after a day of skiing. He stayed late at the bar by himself, got way too drunk, and passed out in the bar with his head on the bar top. The bouncer decided that he was too drunk to stay, and drug him too the door to throw him out. (Many witnesses at the court trial testified that my friend was non-violent, passed out, and completley helpless.)

The bouncer then grabbed my friend by the jacket and opened the door with his head, before throwing him into the street. Instead of hitting the sidewalk, he flew head-first into a light pole just outside the bar, and is now paralyzed for life.

He is now a quadraplegic in a wheelchair for life, because the bouncer wanted to look tough in front of a group of girls.

At the trial, the defense lawyer's main argument was " He now has to live with this everday of his life. That should be punishment enough."
The judge only gave him 2 years in jail, for taking someone elses life away. Worst day of my life!

I sincerley appologize if I offended anyone, but when I hear someone like Dakotah respond with " he has to live with it." , I feel compelled to be a voice against brutal violence.

I hope all of you can see why this is such a sensative issue for me. Many of you from western Canada, will recognize this story, as it was on the news regularily for about a year.
 
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hairlossguru said:
Well then consider this a reply to all of you who responded with red karma. :rolleyes:
I was gonna leave this alone, but its just waaaay too sensative of a topic....

About 6 years ago a freind of mine was partying after a day of skiing. He stayed late at the bar by himself, got way too drunk, and passed out in the bar with his head on the bar top. The bouncer decided that he was too drunk too stay, and drug him too the door to throw him out. (Many witnesses at the court trial testified that my friend was non-violent, passed out and completley helpless.)

The bouncer then grabbed my friend by the jacket and opened the door with his head, before throwing him into the street. Instead of hitting the sidewalk, he flew head-first into a light pole just outside the bar, and paralyzed him for life.

He is now a quadraplegic in a wheelchair for life, because the bouncer wanted to look tough in front of a group of girls.

At the trial, the defense lawyer's main argument was " He now has to live with everday of his life. That should be punishment enough."
The judge only gave him 2 years in jail, for taking someone elses life away. Worst day of my life!

I sinceley appologize if I offended anyone, but when I hear someone like Dakotah respond with " he has to live with it." , I feel compelled to be a voice against brutal violence.

I hope all of you can see why this is such a sensative issue for me. Many of you from western Canada, will recognize this story, as it was on the news regularily for about a year.

I remember that! I remember the news cameras showing the mother of that boy, sobbing outside the courthouse. A very sad story indeed.
 
JerseyArt said:

JA, can you elaborate on how you "returned the favor"?

I never got into fights at school, but I was definately not the most popular guy around. I didn't relate well with anybody when I was a kid/adolescent. Because of that, I still have social issues. I can talk to people fine now (just ask Lumberg or Wodin) but deep down, I still hold back and keep to myself. I still say stupid stuff to people (while thinking I am saying it with good intentions, or worse yet, when I do it in a joking manner).
 
-Never had a relationship last longer than a month

-Modeled for Target

-Dressed up and pretended I was Wonderwoman as a child

-Can read people's auras and have healing powers

-Hate loud noises

-Have a Tourette's like condition where I MUST squish/squash fresh-baked goods

-Very dismissive towards my mother even though I love her more than anyone in the world

-Stuck the forked end of a hammer into my skull

-Very close to being legally blind without corrective lenses

-Used to be able to autofellate
 
FreeballinDC said:
JA, can you elaborate on how you "returned the favor"?

I never got into fights at school, but I was definately not the most popular guy around. I didn't relate well with anybody when I was a kid/adolescent. Because of that, I still have social issues. I can talk to people fine now (just ask Lumberg or Wodin) but deep down, I still hold back and keep to myself. I still say stupid stuff to people (while thinking I am saying it with good intentions, or worse yet, when I do it in a joking manner).






He pissed on me as a kid, so I...... He had already been 17 when he did it, wasnt a child. There was only so much I could tell my dad at the time, cause every time I did, he would retaliate, and then it got worst. Then once they cornered me and shoved a gun in my mouth, and told me they wanted me to tell my dad ( I was 12 at the time) so they'd kill him. I knew my dad would have left one second after I told him to go find them, so from that point onward I never told my dad what was happening, unless he figured it out himself.

Once they jumped me and I didnt realize how bad I was hurt. I thought I could fake it, make it to the bathroom, clean up without him knowing. I stepped in theysaw me and my mom started screaming, I was trying to play it off like what, nothing happened. I didnt realize I had blood pouring out of both my ears. My dad and my unlce went out looking for them, so I chased after,a fraid he would get shot. I remmeber my dad catching the one kid, big fuck who was like 6'8ft 300 lbs, and taking his head and banging it over and over against a telephone pole. I have no idea how the kid lived, cause he wasnt holding anything back.


Socially it didnt effect me, at least ie: making me introverted. By the time I was 14 I had hit 6ft tall, prolly 190lbs and even the seniors knew better than to start up with me.


I get along easily with just about everyone, and Im very empathetic towards people, but I only ever really trust my blood. Maybe that has to do with the past. I also despise weakness and cowards. Not in a mean overt way, but they disgust me. I never asked anyone to carry my water, and I won't let anyone take it from me. And I've never been adept at the whole "Ill kick your ass, no Ill kick yours, but nothing happens" thing. When someone threatens me (in a serious way, not a friend joking) I cant even think enough to talk, and tend to lash out and talk after
.





[/QUOTE]
 
ok, here's more:
11. like aap, i've had someone kill themselves over me too- in high school, after a break up. he hung himself and i didn't know till the end of the summer when i came home from california.
12. I threatened the life of a jahovah witness.
13. my mother left my stepfather for a man 5 years older than me.
14. she had an affair with him for years. some of my friends went to school with him and i didn't know it.
15. my biological father was a nudist
16. the day i brought my newborn son home from the hospital was one of the hardest days of my life. i was 24 and didnt' know how to take care of a baby. he was born early and i was in a lot of pain- and my husband went out with his friends that night till 3am. I never wanted to stab someone in the heart as much as i did the minute he walked in that door.
17. I don't talk to my grandmother.
 
Ok now for the dark side.

-I have sent 10+ people to the hospital.
-I meditate/think daily about my own death
-I meditate/think daily about killing another person though haven't done it
-I have violent fits of rage. They are very infrequent(last was 6yrs ago) though luckily have never harmed anyone else during one.
-I feel almost no remorse and have almost no conscience(sp?) though I try to live my life by a code to prevent me from doing horrible things.
-Everytime I have been in a fight I have actually enjoyed it a lot

These are the types of things I really keep to myself as typically people get really bothered by it. These are also the reasons I try to be nice to people as much as possible so they are less likely to set me off.

Cheers,
Scotsman
 
HS Lifter said:
I agree. It's people like him who give me the impression that everyone on the internet is fucking crazy.
probably, but these kids obviously made his life hell if it was enough for him to be so evil and crazy back.

put it into perspective, sure its not right, or maybe not even justified, but there is a reason
 
1. My best and most favorite subject was always english related (lit., creative writing, vocab., speech, esp. creative writing).
2. I have a broad variety of friends, and can get along with most everyone from any walk of life.
3. Most of my friends are female, and I am very protective of them, and would do most anything for them as I would for any friends.
4. I have only one "best" friend, whom I have known for over 15 years and we can count on each other for absolutely anything.
5. I speak 4 languages.
6. I talk to my mom every week (dad is very hard of hearing so he can't hear on the phone).
7. I love my parents more than anything or anyone (they're still married after 52 years).
8. I used to break into pharmacies and steal drugs to sell them in strip clubs.
9. I was making $75,000 a year by the time I was 23 working full time, and finishing my degree.
10. I have worked in sales, sales management, as a financial consultant, owned 2 businesses (one was actually 3 restaurants), and have made over $100,000 a year working part time, I am now in the medical field.
 
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velvett said:
So far no one "gets" it.

And that's too bad.
:rose:


How do you understand life so well?

I am constantly amazed at your understanding of people and situations, and your acceptance there of.

Cheers,
Scotsman
 
Razorguns said:
EnderJE said:
I can still remember her crying that year, because I would do my best to make fun of her dead brother every chance I saw her. /QUOTE]

Dude. No offense -- but that's pretty fucked up.
What can I say? People do crazy things in HS.
 
HS Lifter said:
So, one second you realize how terrible it was, and then you smile about it? WTF
No, you misunderstand. Sometimes I realize how terrible I acted and feel sorry for her.

Other times (rarely), I smile about his death and am happy for what I did and happy about the pain I caused her because of the pain she caused me.

I liken it to a friend of mine who lost her husband in the Iraq war and how happy she was to see those pictures of the US torturing the Iraqis. Except she has a more legitamite <sp> reason then I.
 
HS Lifter said:
I agree. It's people like him who give me the impression that everyone on the internet is fucking crazy.
Not sure about that. I've always believed that people are just three steps away from becoming a monster. Given the right situation, everyone can go on a spree (of some kind).
 
velvett said:
So far no one "gets" it.

And that's too bad.
:rose:
And they shouldn't.

Forgiveness is always better then hate. For any crime. Otherwise, it just eats you up eventually. Its just a matter of time.

But thanks for the rose and the thought. I appreciate it from you.

:rose:
 
EnderJE said:
And they shouldn't.

Forgiveness is always better then hate. For any crime. Otherwise, it just eats you up eventually. Its just a matter of time.

But thanks for the rose and the thought. I appreciate it from you.

:rose:

Maybe they shouldn't understand but they definitely shouldn't judge.

Don't judge anyone until you have walked a few miles in there shoes, and even then be careful what you judge as you will be judged at one time or another.

Cheers,
Scotsman
 
I was hoping this thread would get to 100 posts.
 
Dial_tone said:
I was hoping this thread would get to 100 posts.

Another one to 400.

I "flunked" out of Drill Sergeant school while in the Reserves. I still have no clue as to why I thought I could be a DS.

When I was in the DC Guard, a select few of my platoon knew I was gay, but didn't rat me out. There are times when I am amazed at the human capacity to accept another that is different.

I am still not out at work, but puhleeez, they gotta know. Never been married, in my 40's, and live in the city. HELLO! Again, they don't ask me any personal questions, but treat me like I am one of their own.

I am now out of group therapy. Between that and my meds, I haven't felt this good in years!! I am going to take what I learned in therapy and continue to become a better man and human. Nobody deserves depression.
 
FreeballinDC said:
Never been married, in my 40's, and live in the city. HELLO!
Doesn't mean you're giegh...
I have aunts and uncles in their 30's to late 50's, that have always been single, they aren't gay...they're just really frigid like me. :whatever: :sulk:
 
Scotsman said:
Ok now for the dark side.

-I have sent 10+ people to the hospital.
-I meditate/think daily about my own death
-I meditate/think daily about killing another person though haven't done it
-I have violent fits of rage. They are very infrequent(last was 6yrs ago) though luckily have never harmed anyone else during one.
-I feel almost no remorse and have almost no conscience(sp?) though I try to live my life by a code to prevent me from doing horrible things.
-Everytime I have been in a fight I have actually enjoyed it a lot

These are the types of things I really keep to myself as typically people get really bothered by it. These are also the reasons I try to be nice to people as much as possible so they are less likely to set me off.

Cheers,
Scotsman

Damn Scots maybe we shouldn't go out and have some frosties...

LOL, I understand most of that except the thinking about death part.
10 peeps is a lot, you got me beat by 7 but those are the things I have tried to put in my past.

Screw it, next time I am in town we are going out, in spite of all the puffed up, wanna be, jackasses that frequent the bars.

Maybe Seashell will lend us her fish for the night...
 
FreeballinDC said:
I am still not out at work, but puhleeez, they gotta know. Never been married, in my 40's, and live in the city. HELLO! Again, they don't ask me any personal questions, but treat me like I am one of their own.
Why should that matter? Who cares if your gay or not?
 
Scotsman said:
How do you understand life so well?

I am constantly amazed at your understanding of people and situations, and your acceptance there of.

Cheers,
Scotsman


I couldn't give you karma but I wanted to tell you're just too kind :heart:

Thanks.
;)
 
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mountain muscle said:
Damn Scots maybe we shouldn't go out and have some frosties...

LOL, I understand most of that except the thinking about death part.
10 peeps is a lot, you got me beat by 7 but those are the things I have tried to put in my past.

Screw it, next time I am in town we are going out, in spite of all the puffed up, wanna be, jackasses that frequent the bars.

Maybe Seashell will lend us her fish for the night...
10 is a lot.

I sent one to the orthodontist...thats it.

A year later he apologized and shook my hand admitting it was entirely his fault.

Just don't understand the male fascination with fighting. Quit thinking about that in the 7th grade.
 
mountain muscle said:
Damn Scots maybe we shouldn't go out and have some frosties...

LOL, I understand most of that except the thinking about death part.
10 peeps is a lot, you got me beat by 7 but those are the things I have tried to put in my past.

Screw it, next time I am in town we are going out, in spite of all the puffed up, wanna be, jackasses that frequent the bars.

Maybe Seashell will lend us her fish for the night...

I sort of fancy myself as a modern samurai. Meditation on death prepares you to live life to the fullest making each moment of each day special. We are all going to die someday in one way or another, and to live in fear or denial of this is to cheapen life.

As for the 10 people about half of that was in football, what can I say I just hit really really hard. The others all deserved what they got as I have never started a fight in my life but will finish one if it happens.

Now as for Seashell's fish, I could say something really dirty now, but I think I will keep it to myself. :p

Velvett- it is just an observation from my vantage point, and I like to spread the truth as much as possible.

Cheers,
Scotsman
 
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