Speaking of the January crowd....

[jenscats5]

oh, you guys not going to believe it.. 5pm... packed jim.. we are trying to get our arms workout done and get out.. This little prick is sitting at the preacher curl bech and talking on the cell phone!!!! we are like - dude, do you have any more sets left?? "yeah, but i need to finish my phone call" Had to pull my gf aside before she smashed his head - damn..

I would have had to have been restrained too.....what an ass

 

[majutsu]

My wife told me about this thread, after I told her this story:

I am in the gym last night doing shoulder and arms. This new 30-something black man has been there at night for the last 4-5 days. He is not obese, but definitely at the beginning stage of bodybuilding, where he could benefit from basic squatting and benching, push-ups and pullups. Anyway this tool starts trying to move the decline bench, which is quite heavy, and is only lifted solo by the heaviest guys for 10 ft to drag it over to the smith machine. I'm doing concentration curls, and this idiot puts the decline bench upside down on its roller pad, and he is just pushing away at this heavy thing balanced upside down on a 4 inch metal roller. Of course the thing is not budging, and each push topples the thing to crashing, and he wrenches his back, screams, and catches the bench, putting it back into precarious position to start all over again! Keep in mind he is doing this all about four feet from my head while I'm doing curls. So I start thinking, "Jesus Christ! Either I'm going to get seriously injured, he is, or both." Putting out my hand and standing up I say, "Whoa! Whoa! Most guys take this in pairs, don't be afraid to ask for help. It's real heavy!" He answers sheepishly, "Oh I was just going to roll it?!?" He then shoves it a few more times and bits of the rubber rolling pad shred off and go flicking around the gym! This leaves the rolling pad in tatters. Believe it or not, I'm still not angry, despite over a gram of anabolics in my system and a hellacious pump. I figure he is new, a little scared and unsure, afraid to ask for help, and, well, we all looked a little foolish at one time starting. So I grab the bench, lay it flat pick it up, as I can carry it myself short distances. But to save face, I tell the guy to grab the head and we'll team carry. He does so. I say, "Where we going?" but start backing toward the smith machine. He says, "Oh no! I'm going to the machine cables?!?" The cables out of the free weight room, almost to the nautilus, 200ft away! (and right by the hammer strength decline bench if you like chest machines . . . ) I'm still not mad, ... yet ... I figure, what the hell, it's a free country, and a little deadlift never hurt anyone. So we move it over there, with him dropping his non-assistance for the last 50-70ft Feel the burn! Anyway I put it down and he says, "Thanks." I start to walk away . . . and now the good part ...

All the sudden he grabs the shredded foot roller (the one he just ripped that is) and says, "Jesus fuckin' christ! Huh man? (Pointing at the roller) I've been here a week and they never fix shit like this!" You mean the roller you just broke!?! I look at him in stunned disbelief. He continues, "If they don't start fixing shit like this I'm going to find me somewhere else to go!" My blood starts to boil now. I can only respond with utter confusion, "You expect them to follow you around with a shovel fixing things as you break them? I sure hope to god you find somewhere else to go, and fast!" As I walk away, I notice he gets on the decline bench, grabs for cables, does two reps, makes a funny face like the angle or feel is wrong, then he gets up and leaves it there! Walking away he waves his hands dismissively at the decline bench as if to say, "Broken shit doesn't work right anyway." He then wanders off to further his path of destruction, and probably bitch somemore about how equipment is left all over in the weirdest places, broken and fucked-up! Yeah BY HIM! lol He wins the award for the dumbest ass I've ever met at the gym in January.

 

[wend]

(I just about died laughing listening to this last night, and Majutsu was laughing so hard he gave himself a headache and had to change the subject!) Funny thing was, I saw all this happen but had my headphones on so didn't hear the exchange...unbelievable!

 

[wend]

You know, no offense to any man reading, but this story totally epitomizes everything that's stereotypically wrong with the male psyche: the inability to ask for help, and the inability to own up to their mistakes. Egads!

 

[wend]

And last night there was another new guy, also in his thirties or so, in there with a buddy...he had bright blue brand-spanking-new spandex shorts and shirt on (you know color coordination is so important in the gym)...and he and his buddy were using the leg press. Well, I guess they had too much weight on it...so a bit into his set, he lets out a scream like someone dropped a 45# plate on his nads. EVERYONE turns to see what happened...and it was nothing. The guy's just sitting there, uninjured, barely sweating. Goodness! I seriously thought we needed to call an ambulance or something.

What's that about? Has he heard it's a sign of a serious lifter to make noise? Cuz I thought the sign of a serious lifter was muscle size...and this guy had a gut that looked like the only exercise he's been getting was the sixteen-ounce curl.

 

[jenscats5]

We have another guy at my gym that wears a sweater on the elliptical -- not a sweatshirt or track suit, etc but a ski sweater -- the nordic kind with all the pattern on it.

Did I mention (I can't remember if I did) the guy who pedals on the stationary bike for an hour or so with a laptop?? He's dripping sweat all over the floor & on his laptop -- but never seems to be pedaling hard. Oh, then when he's losing battery power he drags the bike over to the power outlet to plug the laptop in. Crazy!

 

[smb_69]

wend - hm.. any funny stories about girls making mistakes at the gym? or all about guys?

 

[Daisy_Girl]

There's a girl at my gym who wears sunglasses while she is doing cardio...the J.Lo kind where they aren't very dark, but still they are sunglasses. She never takes them off. This annoys me.

This and the girls that use 5lb weights for chest press. I mean, c'mon. I *know* not everyone is strong, but SURELY they can do more than 5lbs?

 

[wend]

SMB, there are more guys there, so I have more guy stories. BUT, if we can go back before the January crowd showed up, I'll tell you one about two women that still gets us giggling.

Majutsu had told me about a woman who'd been in there training some young woman the night before. He described the trainer as someone who was a pro bodybuilder (she'd won some local titles, I believe) who'd gone too far and regrettably messed with her gender-appearance. So when I saw her in there with a trainee, I checked her out (I usually employ tunnel vision to the best of my ability). She was small in height but seriously well developed, and very lean; she wore typicall, tight, revealing clothes that showed her incredible physique: lycra biker-style shorts, a sports bra covered with a tight-fitting tank silkscreened with the logo of some past competition. She had a few sailor-style tattoos littering her arms and back. Her hair was bleached, with dark roots showing, and sprayed into a short, side-parted helmet. She wore glasses with large, squarish lenses and metal rims. Despite her femaleness and attire, she reminded me for all the world of a science teacher I once had (a male one). Not a stitch of makeup or jewelry to be seen.

Her trainee, on the other hand, had a skinny fat body and looked to be in her late twenties or perhaps early thirties. She seemed to have been the victim of a fashion attack. She wore dark, polyester gympants, a sports bra, and a tightly-cinched weight belt (with fatty skin hanging over it on the sides while she pedaled, warming up on a stationary bike). She had plenty of makeup on. The worst (or best) of it was her hair, long and dark with some very blond streaks, and bunched up into two configurations, high on the sides of her head, like it had been looped a few times and then wrapped with a ponytail holder, the ends left sticking out at odd angles.

After the warmup, I saw them again on the Smith Machine and using dumbells cables. I saw them later on the Nautilus.

O MY GOD.

I had a lot of trouble not laughing, but kept a poker face out of respect for their feelings. Others were not so kind. I saw people pointing and staring and giggling behind their hands. It was awful. I've never seen them there again.

I went home and told my husband that it was not the AAS. The woman has no desire to be feminine. If she hadn't been bodybuilding, she would have simply been an out-of-shape masculine woman.

Majutsu liked the science-teacher comparison. He said it was apt, though for him it's an old math teacher. To facilitate conversation, I've nicknamed her Butch. I call the trainee Cassidy.

To this day, I'm not sure who everyone was laughing at. It was quite a tossup. (Though myself, I was much more amused by Cassidy. Egads. The most severe fashion victim I've ever witnessed, in a gym or anywhere.)

 

[smb_69]

Wend - LMOF - man, oh, man - some people do not just belong to the gym, do they??? but hey - perfect entertainment for those of us that do -