Something awful happened - advice please.

[vinylgroover]

Ask your boyfriend.

HAHAHAHA

 

[Fonz]

The problem is, this isn't the first time I've done something like this to him. When we were allowing eachother to hook up with other people, I overstepped an agreed boundary - twice. This was basically my last chance.

I'm also in a long distance relationship. But I do see my GF for longer than you see your BF.

"This is basically my last chance"

Hmmm........thats you doing the talking there.

Tell him what happenned, and let him decide.

Don't make it an utimatum kind of thing. Just tell him.

And, you seriously need to have few words with that "A" person

He knew of your situation and took advantage.

You were lonely and he used it to his advantage.

Not exactly what real friends do.

Fonz

 

[Fonz]

And I find it funny how people on this thread are dissing her when THEY HAVE NEVER BEEN IN A LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP.

EVER.

The rules are different than in a normal one.

You get lonely sometimes. And the younger you are the more diffcult it is to control those impulses to be with someone.

Did she do something wrong?

Yes. But not INCREDIBLY wrong. Just wrong.

Everyhting is not black and white(Well, except if you had sex with him and then...its over), its more like different shades of grey.

I'm with MP5 on this(Changed my mind)

Don't tell him. Period.
Secondly, DO NOT MOVE IN WITH this "A" person.
If your BF matters anyhting to you, you will not. If he's tried it once with you, he'll definately try again.

Furthermore, you have to learn to control yourself. Yes, being lonely sucks sometimes, but its definately better than feeling guilty(Like you are now).

Fonz

 

[jesus 2]

solution: eat meat.



j2da2

 

[louden_swain]

what the FUCK were u doing with your guy friend "A" anyway? There's no such thing as just friends u STUPID girl.

and yeah, your boyfriend deserves better than a slut like u.

fuck it, I'm telling it like it is.

 

[Frackal]

And I find it funny how people on this thread are dissing her when THEY HAVE NEVER BEEN IN A LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP.

EVER.

The rules are different than in a normal one.

You get lonely sometimes. And the younger you are the more diffcult it is to control those impulses to be with someone.

Did she do something wrong?

Yes. But not INCREDIBLY wrong. Just wrong.

Everyhting is not black and white(Well, except if you had sex with him and then...its over), its more like different shades of grey.

I'm with MP5 on this(Changed my mind)

Don't tell him. Period.
Secondly, DO NOT MOVE IN WITH this "A" person.
If your BF matters anyhting to you, you will not. If he's tried it once with you, he'll definately try again.

Furthermore, you have to learn to control yourself. Yes, being lonely sucks sometimes, but its definately better than feeling guilty(Like you are now).

Fonz

I have fonz under trying circumstances and did not cheat. (yes I could have)

 

[Bikini Mod]

Define "cheating". As far as I am concerned unless there is a spoken verbal commitment (like engagement) it AIN'T cheating.

Sorry, but that is my opinion.

If you find some one else that is closer and you really end up wanting to be with that person or vice versa then you should end the long distance relationship.

Why ON EARTH should she tell her bf? She didn't have sex with the guy. And if she did - yea, so? - what the bf don't know won't hurt. She is only trying to make herself feel better by trying to alleviate a guilty conscience.

I have had TWO long distance relationships and THEY CAN SUCK LIKE A MOTHER, but it is something that the two that enter into it know from the getco.

I have heard of not one but two trans-continental relationships that worked ie ended up in a very happy marriage.

But that is EXTREMELY RARE.

The way I look at it. While you are apart, what the other don't know won't hurt. But if for some reason you keep returning to the person that is far away and you both decide that you truly want to make it work, then someone will eventually have to move. Until then - it is different than a relationship where two people can see each other often.

I was talking to a good friend about this and he told me something that made A LOT OF SENSE. He said that from now on he is not going to worry too much about what a woman "promises" or "tells" him. His attitude is... Damn, now I forgot his exact words. It was something like, "Bring it and I will believe it." In other words - don't just bump your gums - PROVE IT TO ME.

Until then I will no longer stress over a man lying to me. I'll just sit back and enjoy the ride and see if he truly can put his money where his mouth is. Until then it will all be good.

So VLChick - JUST FREAKING CHILL.

 

[Frackal]

Great fucking morals there Em, you lost some of my respect... what the hell happened to you

 

[vinylgroover]

Define "cheating". As far as I am concerned unless there is a spoken verbal commitment (like engagement) it AIN'T cheating.

Sorry, but that is my opinion.

If you find some one else that is closer and you really end up wanting to be with that person or vice versa then you should end the long distance relationship.

Why ON EARTH should she tell her bf? She didn't have sex with the guy. And if she did - yea, so? - what the bf don't know won't hurt. She is only trying to make herself feel better by trying to alleviate a guilty conscience.

I have had TWO long distance relationships and THEY CAN SUCK LIKE A MOTHER, but it is something that the two that enter into it know from the getco.

I have heard of not one but two trans-continental relationships that worked ie ended up in a very happy marriage.

But that is EXTREMELY RARE.

The way I look at it. While you are apart, what the other don't know won't hurt. But if for some reason you keep returning to the person that is far away and you both decide that you truly want to make it work, then someone will eventually have to move. Until then - it is different than a relationship where two people can see each other often.

I was talking to a good friend about this and he told me something that made A LOT OF SENSE. He said that from now on he is not going to worry too much about what a woman "promises" or "tells" him. His attitude is... Damn, now I forgot his exact words. It was something like, "Bring it and I will believe it." In other words - don't just bump your gums - PROVE IT TO ME.

Until then I will no longer stress over a man lying to me. I'll just sit back and enjoy the ride and see if he truly can put his money where his mouth is. Until then it will all be good.

So VLChick - JUST FREAKING CHILL.

E, I'm not sure if you've read her other threads a few weeks back, but she's actually 'cheated' on him before by fucking another guy, so it's an ongoing thing with her.

I think she just needs time to enjoy the single life and sew her wild oats so to speak for a few years. No point hurting others.

 

[Bikini Mod]

You have no idea what I am saying. It seems one way, but it isn't.

You can only be fed a line of BS by just so many men before you start to realize that you are being played for a chump.

I am not advocating "cheating". I have no trouble or issue with being FAITHFUL. I am only saying that as adult relationships go, until I am actually ENGAGED I will talk to who I want, WHEN I WANT. He should also do the same.

I never ever want a man to be with me out of obligation. I want him to be with me because no matter who he is with or what he is doing I AM THE ONLY ONE ON HIS MIND.

I can't tell you how many times I was in the company of a man who was attractive, succesfull, witty and a nice man but the whole time I was with him someone else was on my mind.

I made the mistake of marrying much too young and settling for so much less than what I or my children deserve. I will never EVER make that mistake again.