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Relate your Weirdest Experience While Drunk

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Longhorn85

New member
I'll try keep this short because I know my story will pale in comparison to others here:

Shortly after joining the Army, while stationed at Fort Benning, GA I drove down to visit my cousin who was a grad student at Florida State Univ. We grew up together and hadn't really seen much of each other since we were kids. It was Halloween night. I was about to begin Ranger School and I wanted to party hard.

When I got to his apartment he wasn't home. I couldn't contact him (pre cell phone days) and didn't want to waste time so I drove to the University area and found a bar that looked like fun. It was BYOB and a costume was required to get in. I bought a bottle of Jack and a basic black mask and came back. I wasn't used to drinking hard liquor, but mixed with lots of coke I was sucking the Jack down at breakneck speed. I didn't know a soul but it didn't matter because of the costumes. I danced and drank for a few hours and then I was shit-faced.

Walked out to the parking lot and police saw me, wouldn't let me drive. I wasn't arrested, but they got me to a hospital because I was so drunk. I don't remember getting there but I woke up the next am on a medical table with nurses talking over my head. They had checked my dogtags around my neck and addressed me by name. They wanted more info so they could bill my military health plan. I was paranoid that I would get in trouble and that my young military career would be jeapordized, so I gave them my home address instead and said "bill me", then ran out of that place.

Took a taxi to my car, and drove to my cousin's apt. He was very concerned and asked where I'd been. I didn't want it getting back to my parents that I was such a drunk so I told him I had been tired and slept in the car after an exhausting drive. He looked skeptical but bought the story. I was relieved. Then I said I needed to take a shower and took off my shirt and headed to the bathroom.

My cousin's eyes popped open and he gasped. I ran to the bathroom and saw that my chest was covered with about eight adhesive nodes for the EKG machine at the hospital.

The jig was up.

PS: I met my cousin's roomate, who was overtly gay. I had always susupected that my cousin might be gay but I was never sure until then. We all just thought he was a "sissy". He died about two years later of "pneumonia". I'm quite sure it was AIDS. He never told my story to anyone in my family and I never told his.
 
That's pretty wild. While playing strip quarters with a couple of wild girls, one of them had the idea to get in the car and drive around naked. We drove through the Jack n the box drive through in the nude. The cashier at the window got all excited and wanted to know if he could come to our party. LOL
 
I pissed the bed once. LOL Thats about it. Piss drunk after a buddies mom's wedding. One of my friends got so drunk he entered someone elses apartment and fell asleep on the couch. A dude woke him up with a mild tap on the head with a louisville slugger. They argued for a minute but eventually the guy ended up taking him home about 3 blocks away. the funny part is he was naked on someones couch. he found his clothes in a trail up the stairs and on the side walk outside.

BOOGS
 
Staying in a hostel in Perth Australia, its $3 all the wine you can drink night and I'm first in line with my plastic cup. Next thing I know it's the next afternoon and I'm lying stark naked in the corridor, people are stepping over me to get to the kitchen. My head feels 10 sizes too small, I'm covered in grazes and bruises and I can recall absolutely nothing.

Later I find out that there was a drinking competition, a food fight and a brawling match followed by more drinking. As a grand finale apparently I'd stripped naked and run around the hostel waking everyone up before blacking out.
 
I was hooking up with this chick at the bar and had my buddy leave me there because I was going to her place and she was going to take me out for breakfast. But when we got to her place and got naked she had a very hairy asscrack. Needless to say I didn't have much of an appetite after witnessing that.
 
I honestly don't know where to start. Even worse would be the stories of things I did when the other person was drunk. (usually too them)
 
lost my shoe while walking aross a highway, bent down to pick it up and fell over. state police came by and i had to explain why i was laying face down in the middle of the highway with one shoe...thankfully, they gave me a ride back to my dorm...
 
Longhorn85 said:
I'll try keep this short because I know my story will pale in comparison to others here:

Shortly after joining the Army, while stationed at Fort Benning, GA I drove down to visit my cousin who was a grad student at Florida State Univ. We grew up together and hadn't really seen much of each other since we were kids. It was Halloween night. I was about to begin Ranger School and I wanted to party hard.

When I got to his apartment he wasn't home. I couldn't contact him (pre cell phone days) and didn't want to waste time so I drove to the University area and found a bar that looked like fun. It was BYOB and a costume was required to get in. I bought a bottle of Jack and a basic black mask and came back. I wasn't used to drinking hard liquor, but mixed with lots of coke I was sucking the Jack down at breakneck speed. I didn't know a soul but it didn't matter because of the costumes. I danced and drank for a few hours and then I was shit-faced.

Walked out to the parking lot and police saw me, wouldn't let me drive. I wasn't arrested, but they got me to a hospital because I was so drunk. I don't remember getting there but I woke up the next am on a medical table with nurses talking over my head. They had checked my dogtags around my neck and addressed me by name. They wanted more info so they could bill my military health plan. I was paranoid that I would get in trouble and that my young military career would be jeapordized, so I gave them my home address instead and said "bill me", then ran out of that place.

Took a taxi to my car, and drove to my cousin's apt. He was very concerned and asked where I'd been. I didn't want it getting back to my parents that I was such a drunk so I told him I had been tired and slept in the car after an exhausting drive. He looked skeptical but bought the story. I was relieved. Then I said I needed to take a shower and took off my shirt and headed to the bathroom.

My cousin's eyes popped open and he gasped. I ran to the bathroom and saw that my chest was covered with about eight adhesive nodes for the EKG machine at the hospital.

The jig was up.

PS: I met my cousin's roomate, who was overtly gay. I had always susupected that my cousin might be gay but I was never sure until then. We all just thought he was a "sissy". He died about two years later of "pneumonia". I'm quite sure it was AIDS. He never told my story to anyone in my family and I never told his.
Click to expand...

hahaahah you said "jig".

lolol

That's fun stuff sir but that was like a Tuesday when I visited FSU. I am trying to figure out which FSU story to post up.
 
last year I was staying at a buddies dorm room,they had a big party in the building and I took off on other floors to meet women, well I ended up getting locked in the fucking lobby drunk as fuck in a toga,my buddy passed out and wouldnt answer his phone,so I ended up sleeping in the lobby,which was cool as it had heat, however the first floor of the building also had classes in it and I was passed out on the couch with my legs wide open,junk hanging out and woke up to people looking at me laughing.

I havent saw pictures of it yet,but Im sure they exhist
 
Funny stories but I'm waiting for the one when one of you had a one-time chance with a Pamela Anderson-type and can't perform or throw up on her. Then never see her again.
 
One time when I was drunk, i had a long conversation with MTS. I was so drunk that I could have sworn we talked about his new house and he wanted my ideas for it, we talked about getting together next time we were in the same state, we talked about some jokes we've played and laughed and laughed and what a great conversation we had.

then i sobered up and found out he was only acting.

oh wait, i wasn't drunk for that. lol
 
theoak01 said:
last year I was staying at a buddies dorm room,they had a big party in the building and I took off on other floors to meet women, well I ended up getting locked in the fucking lobby drunk as fuck in a toga,my buddy passed out and wouldnt answer his phone,so I ended up sleeping in the lobby,which was cool as it had heat, however the first floor of the building also had classes in it and I was passed out on the couch with my legs wide open,junk hanging out and woke up to people looking at me laughing.

I havent saw pictures of it yet,but Im sure they exhist
Click to expand...


lol , thats funny.
 
Longhorn85 said:
Funny stories but I'm waiting for the one when one of you had a one-time chance with a Pamela Anderson-type and can't perform or throw up on her. Then never see her again.
Click to expand...


I once called this girl I was dating my ex's name,the crazy bitch kicked me in the stomach so hard I fell out the bed, was way to drunk so I passed out naked on the floor,rubber still on.

woke up and she acted like it never happened.

very crazy bitch she was
 
theoak01 said:
I was passed out on the couch with my legs wide open,junk hanging out and woke up to people looking at me laughing.
Click to expand...

Damn, I hope they weren't laughing at the size of your junk.
 
Longhorn85 said:
Damn, I hope they weren't laughing at the size of your junk.
Click to expand...

me to,I was drunk and passed out so it was likely my junk was hibernating, however I figure they didnt know about the party and were just shocked seeing some drunk dude on a couch in a toga passed out at like noon.

I cant believe nobody said anything to me and just left me there
 
more like a book

want a good one? the time i got we this kid drunk in High school for the first time ever...got him on a greyhound bus and sent his passed out ass 450 miles north

no cell

no money

hmmmm he hooo heee = fucked

me = fucked for doiung it
 
tiger88 said:
more like a book

want a good one? the time i got we this kid drunk in High school for the first time ever...got him on a greyhound bus and sent his passed out ass 450 miles north

no cell

no money

hmmmm he hooo heee = fucked

me = fucked for doiung it
Click to expand...

Not bad, what's in the next chapter of your book?
 
I was in Panama City and got drunk at the club, then got separated and had to walk home. there I am on Front Beach Rd, white shirt, jeans, Ranger haircut, walking along.

The dude comes up to me in a Camaro - fat black guy like 30ish (I was 23) and says "hey man, you need a ride". I was like "sure", and I hop in. That was probably dangerous, but I was 23, an Army Ranger and...did I mention really drunk?

I had the combination of being a real badass and the mindset of thinking I was indestructible. So I told the guy where I was staying and he heads out down the road. Two streets later he turns off and he was like "I just gotta stop by the house real quick".

I was a little scared, but drunk Rangers never show fear. So he gets out, and I decide I better get out too; if I get attacked, sitting in a car is not the place to be. I get out and follow him into his house.

He's like "you want a beer?" I said "sure as long as I open the bottle." He gives me one and it was sealed, so no biggie. Then he puts on this porn of this guy with like a 16" cock hammering these two girls. It was like he was hitting them with a baseball bat.

Then this one girl starts blowing the guy in the movie. The black guy who picked me up says "You like that?" I was like "yeah I love porn". Then he says "You have a cock like that? Are you that big"?

I was like um...my arm in that big, lol. So I said, "almost that size". LOL!

The black guy points at the blowjob on the screen and says "I could do that for you if you want".

I said "no thanks man". I stood up and must have gotten combative, so he was like "hey man, don't hurt me, i was just asking".

I said, nah, it's cool, but we probably better take off. He was only too happy to drop me off after that.

That was some weird shit.

I was debating whether or not to include the time I started drinking in ATL and woke up in Charleston. That was weird too.
 
Longhorn85 said:
Funny stories but I'm waiting for the one when one of you had a one-time chance with a Pamela Anderson-type and can't perform or throw up on her. Then never see her again.
Click to expand...


Remember plifter? He passed out while eating his dates box that night.
 
I found out the hard way that I'm extremely allergic to beer. I went from having a few (meaning 3 and not finishing the 4th) with friends before the Supercross races to 'needing to use the ladies room' to laying on the floor of the ladies room in toxic shock as the medics tried to revive me. (Yes, they had to pull my pants up for me... thank god I'd shaved and put on clean panties) I then spent the rest of the evening in the trauma unit strapped to a bed with tubes stuck in my arm.
 
Wow DD, that's a hell of a story. Anyone else do anything fun?

AAP as far as Plifter is concerned, that is only a good story if the girl is hot.
 
Last edited:
Longhorn85 said:
Wow DD, that's a hell of a story. Anything else do anything fun?

AAP as far as Plifter is concerned, that is only a good story if the girl is hot.
Click to expand...


He claimed she was. But this was a guy that couldn't get a date ever. He finally popped up one day and was talking about this hot girl he was going to hook up with IN THREE WEEKS. Yeah, fucking three weeks and he was already posting daily how hot she was and how he was going to take clomid to get a big load, impress her... then the day (or night) of the date, he was so nervous he had too much to drink and then passed out within seconds of starting to eat her box.
 
I was a transexual flasher one year for halloween, won a costume contest, $500 bucks! I wore a trenchcoat and under I wore a bra and I made a HUGE penis from a pair of panty hose and an old wig. I attached it to a thong undie.. crazy huge penis hung down to my calves and peeked out the bottom of the coat. I got all hammered and passed out in the bushes, I woke up and my penis was all twisted around my legs... I ripped it off and hung it on some random cars side mirror and walked away.
2 years later:
I was sitting on my boyfriends bed all hammered on new years eve (new boyfriend) and in his closet was this giant PENIS. No lie. I thought I was hallucinating cause I had the spinners bad. I asked him wtf it was, he pulled it out and there it was MY penis!!!! My friggin penis from halloween, with the old wig attached. He said he found it on a car, he let it hang out of his pants for the rest of halloween night and friggin kept it. we got married 6 months later.

I have had weirder experiences sober.
 
CaliGirl said:
I was a transexual flasher one year for halloween, won a costume contest, $500 bucks! I wore a trenchcoat and under I wore a bra and I made a HUGE penis from a pair of panty hose and an old wig. I attached it to a thong undie.. crazy huge penis hung down to my calves and peeked out the bottom of the coat. I got all hammered and passed out in the bushes, I woke up and my penis was all twisted around my legs... I ripped it off and hung it on some random cars side mirror and walked away.
2 years later:
I was sitting on my boyfriends bed all hammered on new years eve (new boyfriend) and in his closet was this giant PENIS. No lie. I thought I was hallucinating cause I had the spinners bad. I asked him wtf it was, he pulled it out and there it was MY penis!!!! My friggin penis from halloween, with the old wig attached. He said he found it on a car, he let it hang out of his pants for the rest of halloween night and friggin kept it. we got married 6 months later.

I have had weirder experiences sober.
Click to expand...

Nothing quite like finding your old penis in your boyfriends closet.
 
ha ha!
it was the friggin freakiest thing ever. The costume was a last minute, what do I have in the house to wear for halloween drunken stupor put together. years later after we were married, he dressed as my pimp and I of course was a ho, he wore the penis.
 
CaliGirl said:
ha ha!
it was the friggin freakiest thing ever. The costume was a last minute, what do I have in the house to wear for halloween drunken stupor put together. years later after we were married, he dressed as my pimp and I of course was a ho, he wore the penis.
Click to expand...

fantasy fest?

I used to wear a giant penis. It was cheap and oh so popular.
 
CaliGirl said:
whats fantasy fest? i want some, sounds fun.
Click to expand...

Big Haloween party down in Key West. Everyone becomes a freak for a few days.

Always some idiots show up who shouldn't. They take Haloween costumes seriously. :worried:


About 70,000 partiers. Good times. Everyone is very friendly.
 
Longhorn85 said:
I'll try keep this short because I know my story will pale in comparison to others here:

Shortly after joining the Army, while stationed at Fort Benning, GA I drove down to visit my cousin who was a grad student at Florida State Univ. We grew up together and hadn't really seen much of each other since we were kids. It was Halloween night. I was about to begin Ranger School and I wanted to party hard.

When I got to his apartment he wasn't home. I couldn't contact him (pre cell phone days) and didn't want to waste time so I drove to the University area and found a bar that looked like fun. It was BYOB and a costume was required to get in. I bought a bottle of Jack and a basic black mask and came back. I wasn't used to drinking hard liquor, but mixed with lots of coke I was sucking the Jack down at breakneck speed. I didn't know a soul but it didn't matter because of the costumes. I danced and drank for a few hours and then I was shit-faced.

Walked out to the parking lot and police saw me, wouldn't let me drive. I wasn't arrested, but they got me to a hospital because I was so drunk. I don't remember getting there but I woke up the next am on a medical table with nurses talking over my head. They had checked my dogtags around my neck and addressed me by name. They wanted more info so they could bill my military health plan. I was paranoid that I would get in trouble and that my young military career would be jeapordized, so I gave them my home address instead and said "bill me", then ran out of that place.

Took a taxi to my car, and drove to my cousin's apt. He was very concerned and asked where I'd been. I didn't want it getting back to my parents that I was such a drunk so I told him I had been tired and slept in the car after an exhausting drive. He looked skeptical but bought the story. I was relieved. Then I said I needed to take a shower and took off my shirt and headed to the bathroom.

My cousin's eyes popped open and he gasped. I ran to the bathroom and saw that my chest was covered with about eight adhesive nodes for the EKG machine at the hospital.

The jig was up.

PS: I met my cousin's roomate, who was overtly gay. I had always susupected that my cousin might be gay but I was never sure until then. We all just thought he was a "sissy". He died about two years later of "pneumonia". I'm quite sure it was AIDS. He never told my story to anyone in my family and I never told his.
Click to expand...


did they bill you? how much was it?
 
vansmack2000 said:
did they bill you? how much was it?
Click to expand...

They sure did. It was about 225 bucks. That was a lot for a Second Lieutenant back in 1987, but I was glad to close the loop on that incident.


CaliGirl said:
2 years later:
I was sitting on my boyfriends bed all hammered on new years eve (new boyfriend) and in his closet was this giant PENIS.

I have had weirder experiences sober.
Click to expand...

Great story! The sober ones must be great.
 
Testosterone boy said:
Big Haloween party down in Key West. Everyone becomes a freak for a few days.

Always some idiots show up who shouldn't. They take Haloween costumes seriously. :worried:


About 70,000 partiers. Good times. Everyone is very friendly.
Click to expand...

I've done Fantasy Fest four times. The last time I got body painted, almost got arrested and almost got pulled off one of the floats in the Sat night parade and strangled while people grabbed at all the beads I had stupidly hung around my neck so I'd have them to throw out to people. I also clocked one girl right in the face w/ a string of beads. (Sorry hun, was just trying to get the goodies to the people in the back row...) All of this happening w/ me wearing paint and a thong. And no I wasn't drunk. One of the first things you discover about Fantasy Fest is that you DO NOT want to use the portapotties and paint is not considered proper attire to enter an eating establishment to use their facilities. Therefore I do not drink at Fantasy Fest.
 
Sassy69 said:
I also clocked one girl right in the face w/ a string of beads. (Sorry hun, was just trying to get the goodies to the people in the back row...) All of this happening w/ me wearing paint and a thong.
Click to expand...

Great story Sassy, and sounds like it could have easily turned into an entertaining catfight!
 
Sassy69 said:
I've done Fantasy Fest four times. The last time I got body painted, almost got arrested and almost got pulled off one of the floats in the Sat night parade and strangled while people grabbed at all the beads I had stupidly hung around my neck so I'd have them to throw out to people. I also clocked one girl right in the face w/ a string of beads. (Sorry hun, was just trying to get the goodies to the people in the back row...) All of this happening w/ me wearing paint and a thong. And no I wasn't drunk. One of the first things you discover about Fantasy Fest is that you DO NOT want to use the portapotties and paint is not considered proper attire to enter an eating establishment to use their facilities. Therefore I do not drink at Fantasy Fest.
Click to expand...

Did I interview you with my giant penis? I interviewed dozens...maybe hundreds.
 
There are always lots of dicks, I mean penises walking around at FF. I even have a pic of a guy getting a full on blow job right in broad daylight on Duval St.
 
Hmmm.. dont think Ive ever gotten so drunk that things have gotten "weird"


What the hell is FF? sounds like something my wife and I should be attending on a regular basis.
 
I was at a house party in a less developed, unfamilliar part of town when we all decided to play "fuck the dealer." I was the dealer who got fucked and began to feel sick. I made my way to my car where i started throwing up. Some kids were staring at me from the driveway so i got in my car to drive down the road until i felt better. I made a couple of turns and had to throw up again. next thing i know it's 4:00 am and i'm waking up in my car with it on, door opened and door panel covered in puke. I cleaned up what i could and tried to make my way home but I was absolutly LOST. my friend wasn't answering his phone so I drove around for about 30 until i realized i wasn't getting out of here. I pulled over and slept in my car for the night and called my friend in the morning for directions.
_________________________________________________________________

I was at party hanging out with this kid i had met a couple of weeks before and two girls. The party wasn't really poppin so me and dude take the girls out to his truck for a more VIP kinda party. were talking and drinking for an hour or so then the girls leave. me and the kid chilled in the truck while he was waiting for a friend. in the process i pass out. it was somewhat because i was drunk but mostly cuz i was tired. the next day i see the kid at the beach and he starts going on about how i told him my life story last night and started spitting some shit back to me that was VERY personal. Turns out i didn't pass out i was actually spilling my life story to this kid i just met
 
Last night. Apparently I logged on here and on myspace and told some peeps some things......things I wouldn't normally tell.

And no you fags, I'm not :rainbow: , im str8

thing is i don't remember posting last night. lol
 
milo hobgoblin said:
Hmmm.. dont think Ive ever gotten so drunk that things have gotten "weird"


What the hell is FF? sounds like something my wife and I should be attending on a regular basis.
Click to expand...


FF = Fantasy Fest - its like a big gay & straight naked drink fest in Key West the week of Halloween.
 
JayC9 said:
Staying in a hostel in Perth Australia, its $3 all the wine you can drink night and I'm first in line with my plastic cup. Next thing I know it's the next afternoon and I'm lying stark naked in the corridor, people are stepping over me to get to the kitchen. My head feels 10 sizes too small, I'm covered in grazes and bruises and I can recall absolutely nothing.

Later I find out that there was a drinking competition, a food fight and a brawling match followed by more drinking. As a grand finale apparently I'd stripped naked and run around the hostel waking everyone up before blacking out.
Click to expand...
so taht was YOU!!!!!!!
 
A bunch of my boys took me out to a club for my 21st birthday. After consuming copious amounts of alkyhal, I decided I needed a little TLC from my lady at the time who happened to be a stripper and who also happened to live with two other strippers. That's the last thing I remember for several hours but somehow I got in my car and drove to her apartment. To this day I do not remember a single street I took in getting there. Anyway, I was awoken about 4 a.m. both by rocks hitting the window and three Costa Rican strippers yelling at me. To backtrack, I had driven my car to the club with two of my buddies with the intention being they would drive me home later. Apparently, I hadn't bothered to mention my plans to them and had slipped out of the club unnoticed. The problem was that one of my buddies had left his keys in the backseat of my car. They grabbed a cab to the apartment (which was only two floors) and proceeded to throw rocks at the window until I woke up. Now the ladies did not know who these fine gentlemen were and both were rather large young men so they were understandably upset and scared. I went downstairs and gave my man his keys and then returned to try and apologize and calm the three women down. Well, there was mucho yelling and cursing in Spanish much of which I did not understand. I was still extremely intoxicated and reciprocated in kind. Eventually, we were all screaming at each other. After a few minutes, I started to realize that I found this extremely arousing. I stopped yelling and locked lips with my girl and before I knew it, all four of us were frolicking sans garments on the bed. Most fantastic night of sex I've ever experienced.

And yes, I did grow a pornstar mustache right afterward.......
 
CaliGirl said:
I was a transexual flasher one year for halloween, won a costume contest, $500 bucks! I wore a trenchcoat and under I wore a bra and I made a HUGE penis from a pair of panty hose and an old wig. I attached it to a thong undie.. crazy huge penis hung down to my calves and peeked out the bottom of the coat. I got all hammered and passed out in the bushes, I woke up and my penis was all twisted around my legs... I ripped it off and hung it on some random cars side mirror and walked away.
2 years later:
I was sitting on my boyfriends bed all hammered on new years eve (new boyfriend) and in his closet was this giant PENIS. No lie. I thought I was hallucinating cause I had the spinners bad. I asked him wtf it was, he pulled it out and there it was MY penis!!!! My friggin penis from halloween, with the old wig attached. He said he found it on a car, he let it hang out of his pants for the rest of halloween night and friggin kept it. we got married 6 months later.

I have had weirder experiences sober.
Click to expand...
i bet u got raped like 50 times
 
Sassy69 said:
There are always lots of dicks, I mean penises walking around at FF. I even have a pic of a guy getting a full on blow job right in broad daylight on Duval St.
Click to expand...

From a guy or gal? Fantasy Fest always had plenty of shocking going on.

I don't know if it attracted freaks or normal people "let their hair down" for a few days.

Both I imagine.

You would remember being interviewed by me. My stuff weighed several pounds.

A couple gals asked me to stick it in them. They couldn't have been serious. It would ahev hurt.
 
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