need help getting over a breakup

[Meantime1]

i just woke up and havent slept much at all. its hitting me harder today. she never called me last night, which is good, but hurtfull, cuz this means she is over me already. its day 3, and i feel like its just getting worse. who the fuck said its better after the first two days? i had nightmares the whole time i was sleeping.


i know she is only 21, but we were together for almost 2 years, and she was so sure about me pretty much the whole time. i just thought that we could help each other on this path of life and go together, thats what love is after all. i have to keep saying to myself, that she never loved me, and doesnt want to be with me. i strongly believe that when you love someone, you dotn jut walk away to find yourself, especialy when you;ve been telling this person the whole time that they are your soul mate and want to be with you forever. then again, i dont know what the fuck love is. i thought this was it, and now i have no clue. i know she is hurt, and i feel like i still need to be there for her. but who is gonna be there for me? no one. this is her choice and i just have to swallow the fact that the last 2 years meant nothing to her and she wants to be without me. im scared for her, because the world is a harsh place and she is so naive sometimes. she is gonna get hurt and i cant be there to protect her. sorry guys, i know i sound like a broken record, but this is fucking hard for me.

Ok you have answered your own thoughts and questions, you know she's 21 and can be naive sometimes, and that is why she needs to do this for herself, the only way she can really know who she is, is by making mistakes and learning from them, you have to remember our mistakes makes us what we are and only from them do we know how to do things right. Don't hate her for wanting to grow and be the person that she is trying to be, Love is unconditional, and i know u love her, as much as she loves you, but sometimes when u really love someone who have to let them live their own life's, set them free, remember what is truly meant for you will not pass you by,

I know you hurt, and you have every right to, after all you shared a part of your life with her and gave her a part of you, But please don't let it make u bitter or I'm sure that is not what she would want u to become, you have to make her see why she fell in love with in the first place, be the man that you would be proud of, CRY if u want to, eat, drink if u want to, but whatever u do, don't bottle it up inside, feel your pain and acknowledge what you are feeling, WRITE it down if u want to and ride it out, believe you me, Time is a great healer and sometimes we all need to be patient,

x Meamtime1

 

[danielson]

dont fucking stress about her and protecting her...she made her bed and now she can lay in it

she showed herself to only care about no.1- herself. She could have taken the easy way out and told u upfront she wanted to go back to school, but instead she made the last few months hell on you by treating you like shit and not loving u like you loved her

think about it....would you want someone like this when things got tough? one thing you have to understand about people in general and especially women (as they are the ones you tend to let in under radar) is that they act in what there self interest is, and the 'worry' of this is enough to get them to act in any way, even detach themselvesfrom feelings they have. a woman is ultimately able to justify anything to herself as the 'right thing to do' just as a guy is able to do anything and accept what it makes him.

she showed herself to be this type of girl. when u were in your 30's and she in her mid 20's imagine what would happen when u wanted kids and she was bar hopping. If she ever loved u she will understand u need time apart, dont call or email her for a while, at least a month or 2, and then see if she was worth it.

chances are she wasnt. sorry bro, the only time you can figure these things out is when that decision has to be made, and she chose what she wanted. look on it this way, you will find someone else. your age

 

[D2134]

When I was 19 I was engaged to a 20 year old, almost was suicidal after we broke up. Talked a little like you, but also decided to throw alcohol and drugs into the mix.

Now I am with an amazing girl that blows my first fiance away in every category: attraction, personality, work ethic, etc. What a shame it would have been for me to marry a girl that can't make me feel half as in love as who I am with now.

But...as mature as she is, my gf is 18...my biggest fear is going through this again. But, as it always does, I do believe the cycle would continue. There would have to be someone even more of a match out there...

 

[Forge]

Think of her as a stepping stone, a lesson learned.

You both found each other and for a time loved one another. In that time you learned more about each other and about yourself, what you want out of life, what you want out of a partner. You became stronger. But that strength isn't without cost, the price is what you are feeling now as you part ways. Her path is different than yours, and you have to let her go down it on her own while you walk your own road. But the knowledge and strength you have gained is still there. Use it, learn from it, you know better what you want out of life now than you did before.

It isn't easy, but it's life. Eventually you will meet someone who is going down the same road you are, but this 21 year old isn't the one. Don't make the mistake of looking back to see where your ex's road goes, but look forward so you don't miss the junction when Ms. Right crosses your path.

In the meantime, enjoy the scenery on YOUR road, not hers.