Well even though my name doesn't appear in the list I'll volunteer to go first.
Whem my mom was really pregnant she was in Lima Peru working for the Voice of America when a coup happened. She went to a Reuters office to file a story and as she was in there some soldiers came in and put everyone under arrest. Everyone was deported. But there was one problem. My mom was so pregnant no airline would give her a ticket. So my parents were put under house arrest. A few weeks later my mom's uterus starts twitching at like 5:50. Curfew is at 6. So my dad leads a wild race down the Lima streets to get to the hospital before the soldiers started capping people.
I'm born, and as soon as I am old enough to travel we are outta there. Never been back and don't have plans to.
We do the obligatory tour of the country, showing me off to the relatives, than it's off to Japan.
Now a lot of fucked up shit happened in Japan. They are the most Xenophobic country and I got pissed on by the Japanese kids, literally. For some reason my parents decided to send me to Japanese schools. Imagine being the only black kid in kindergarten in Montgomery, AL, in like 1950. Then multiply it by 10. Only at the time I had no idea that was wrong. Suffice it to say I grew up with a serious inferiority complex I am still getting over. I still resent my parents for doing that to me.
Anyways it was Kyoto for 2 years, Yokohama for a year, and Tokyo for 2 years, for those keeping count.
Then it's back to Reston, VA (outside DC) for grades 1-5. I was culturally behind when I got here but I caught up pretty quick. Not much happened here except that me and this girl used to hide in the forest and look at each others' private parts. Then her dad got wind of that and I hardly ever saw her again.
Then I went to Venezuela for three years. My parents convinced me to skip 7th grade (again a horrible decision I resent quite a bit--I mean, of all grades?!?!?) so I was there for grades 6-9. I was in the Junior Honor Society and a serious nerd.
Then it was off to Costa Rica. Things got a little better. I had a couple of cool teachers and did AP classes, editor of the newspaper, all that nerdy stuff. I graduated second out of like 22. While my mom was up moving me into school my dad absconded with a bunch of their stuff. So they got divorced...more on this later. He stayed in C.R. and she moved back to Reston.
At the time I thought I was all unconventional and shit so I went to this college called New College in Sarasota, Florida. No grades, just pass/fail with lots of hippiness going around. Lost my virginity at age 17 to the bass player in my band. It turned out she had had sex with the lead singer only hours before.

It sucked as I took a semester off after a year and lived at home. Then I went back, did another semester, then dropped out. I ended up with 4 semesters worth of work.
So I move back home (Reston) and work as a bell man at the local hotel for like a year. Then she got her orders to go back to Japan so I moved in with an old New College roommate in College Park and got a job as a mechanic. Did this for a couple of years until I decided I wanted to go back to school. I picked Catholic because they had D3 sports and it had always been my dream to play organized football.
So I go back to school and join the football team my senior year (coach wanted me to do offseason lifting since I had never played before). Played like 5 plays and graduated with a BS in Comp Sci. with like a 3.9. We won the ODAC and got a playoff beth but lost in the first round. Stayed for grad school, played my 5th year of eligibility (like 3 plays), then finished grad school (Master of Finance).
Oh yeah around this time I find out that my mom never actually divorced my dad but had told everybody (including her dad, sister, etc.) that she had. She said it was because if she had divorced him he wouldn't have had health insurance. I'm sure generations of Catholic guilt also factored into this.
My last semester of school my dad got real sick. I flew down to C.R. and he died 2 weeks later. We buried his ashes in July.
Now I work in IT at a well-known quasi governmental body and am buying a house tomorrow. I have an awesome girlfriend and while my job is pretty boring I would say my life is pretty much on track.
I think that covers most of the interesting/important stuff.
JC