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sermon_of_mockery
Snurd Nurdler
oh yeah classic,thanxHappyScrappy said:
Wayne's World
i want to hear some biographies
- Thread starter Lao Tzu
- Start date
24 yr old male
used to be fat
now im semi-ripped
used to take bus everwhere
now i drive a nice bmw
used to depend on people for money
now they depend on me
i never thought id love someone
i found out the hard way that i do
used to be insecure
now im brimming with confidence
used to be fat
now im semi-ripped
used to take bus everwhere
now i drive a nice bmw
used to depend on people for money
now they depend on me
i never thought id love someone
i found out the hard way that i do
used to be insecure
now im brimming with confidence
sermon_of_mockery
Snurd Nurdler
georgie24 said:
dude you just cut and pasted my profile,get your own.Congrats on not being a fatty too!!!
I think he basically means sum up your life. Its gonna have to fit in a post, but posts can be pretty long.
Talk about your childhood briefly (or at length, if it was a really important part of your life or events which occured during it that really shaped your life). Then talk about your adulthood to the current time.
Things you could talk about:
Family
Schooling
Jobs
Prominent Events (especially life-altering ones)
Religion
Talk about your childhood briefly (or at length, if it was a really important part of your life or events which occured during it that really shaped your life). Then talk about your adulthood to the current time.
Things you could talk about:
Family
Schooling
Jobs
Prominent Events (especially life-altering ones)
Religion
sermon_of_mockery
Snurd Nurdler
child of divorced parents,1 brother(asshole)
highschool grad, now in college getting my edumacatioms
low end jobs only
athiest
oh yeah and I'm horny
highschool grad, now in college getting my edumacatioms
low end jobs only
athiest
oh yeah and I'm horny
Last edited:
GinNJuice
New member
My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a 15 year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims, like he invented the question mark. Sometimes, he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy - the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical: summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring, we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Pretty standard, really.
sermon_of_mockery
Snurd Nurdler
you guys are all over mike myers sack today
Lumberg
New member
Well even though my name doesn't appear in the list I'll volunteer to go first.
Whem my mom was really pregnant she was in Lima Peru working for the Voice of America when a coup happened. She went to a Reuters office to file a story and as she was in there some soldiers came in and put everyone under arrest. Everyone was deported. But there was one problem. My mom was so pregnant no airline would give her a ticket. So my parents were put under house arrest. A few weeks later my mom's uterus starts twitching at like 5:50. Curfew is at 6. So my dad leads a wild race down the Lima streets to get to the hospital before the soldiers started capping people.
I'm born, and as soon as I am old enough to travel we are outta there. Never been back and don't have plans to.
We do the obligatory tour of the country, showing me off to the relatives, than it's off to Japan.
Now a lot of fucked up shit happened in Japan. They are the most Xenophobic country and I got pissed on by the Japanese kids, literally. For some reason my parents decided to send me to Japanese schools. Imagine being the only black kid in kindergarten in Montgomery, AL, in like 1950. Then multiply it by 10. Only at the time I had no idea that was wrong. Suffice it to say I grew up with a serious inferiority complex I am still getting over. I still resent my parents for doing that to me.
Anyways it was Kyoto for 2 years, Yokohama for a year, and Tokyo for 2 years, for those keeping count.
Then it's back to Reston, VA (outside DC) for grades 1-5. I was culturally behind when I got here but I caught up pretty quick. Not much happened here except that me and this girl used to hide in the forest and look at each others' private parts. Then her dad got wind of that and I hardly ever saw her again.
Then I went to Venezuela for three years. My parents convinced me to skip 7th grade (again a horrible decision I resent quite a bit--I mean, of all grades?!?!?) so I was there for grades 6-9. I was in the Junior Honor Society and a serious nerd.
Then it was off to Costa Rica. Things got a little better. I had a couple of cool teachers and did AP classes, editor of the newspaper, all that nerdy stuff. I graduated second out of like 22. While my mom was up moving me into school my dad absconded with a bunch of their stuff. So they got divorced...more on this later. He stayed in C.R. and she moved back to Reston.
At the time I thought I was all unconventional and shit so I went to this college called New College in Sarasota, Florida. No grades, just pass/fail with lots of hippiness going around. Lost my virginity at age 17 to the bass player in my band. It turned out she had had sex with the lead singer only hours before.
It sucked as I took a semester off after a year and lived at home. Then I went back, did another semester, then dropped out. I ended up with 4 semesters worth of work.
So I move back home (Reston) and work as a bell man at the local hotel for like a year. Then she got her orders to go back to Japan so I moved in with an old New College roommate in College Park and got a job as a mechanic. Did this for a couple of years until I decided I wanted to go back to school. I picked Catholic because they had D3 sports and it had always been my dream to play organized football.
So I go back to school and join the football team my senior year (coach wanted me to do offseason lifting since I had never played before). Played like 5 plays and graduated with a BS in Comp Sci. with like a 3.9. We won the ODAC and got a playoff beth but lost in the first round. Stayed for grad school, played my 5th year of eligibility (like 3 plays), then finished grad school (Master of Finance).
Oh yeah around this time I find out that my mom never actually divorced my dad but had told everybody (including her dad, sister, etc.) that she had. She said it was because if she had divorced him he wouldn't have had health insurance. I'm sure generations of Catholic guilt also factored into this.
My last semester of school my dad got real sick. I flew down to C.R. and he died 2 weeks later. We buried his ashes in July.
Now I work in IT at a well-known quasi governmental body and am buying a house tomorrow. I have an awesome girlfriend and while my job is pretty boring I would say my life is pretty much on track.
I think that covers most of the interesting/important stuff.
JC
Whem my mom was really pregnant she was in Lima Peru working for the Voice of America when a coup happened. She went to a Reuters office to file a story and as she was in there some soldiers came in and put everyone under arrest. Everyone was deported. But there was one problem. My mom was so pregnant no airline would give her a ticket. So my parents were put under house arrest. A few weeks later my mom's uterus starts twitching at like 5:50. Curfew is at 6. So my dad leads a wild race down the Lima streets to get to the hospital before the soldiers started capping people.
I'm born, and as soon as I am old enough to travel we are outta there. Never been back and don't have plans to.
We do the obligatory tour of the country, showing me off to the relatives, than it's off to Japan.
Now a lot of fucked up shit happened in Japan. They are the most Xenophobic country and I got pissed on by the Japanese kids, literally. For some reason my parents decided to send me to Japanese schools. Imagine being the only black kid in kindergarten in Montgomery, AL, in like 1950. Then multiply it by 10. Only at the time I had no idea that was wrong. Suffice it to say I grew up with a serious inferiority complex I am still getting over. I still resent my parents for doing that to me.
Anyways it was Kyoto for 2 years, Yokohama for a year, and Tokyo for 2 years, for those keeping count.
Then it's back to Reston, VA (outside DC) for grades 1-5. I was culturally behind when I got here but I caught up pretty quick. Not much happened here except that me and this girl used to hide in the forest and look at each others' private parts. Then her dad got wind of that and I hardly ever saw her again.
Then I went to Venezuela for three years. My parents convinced me to skip 7th grade (again a horrible decision I resent quite a bit--I mean, of all grades?!?!?) so I was there for grades 6-9. I was in the Junior Honor Society and a serious nerd.
Then it was off to Costa Rica. Things got a little better. I had a couple of cool teachers and did AP classes, editor of the newspaper, all that nerdy stuff. I graduated second out of like 22. While my mom was up moving me into school my dad absconded with a bunch of their stuff. So they got divorced...more on this later. He stayed in C.R. and she moved back to Reston.
At the time I thought I was all unconventional and shit so I went to this college called New College in Sarasota, Florida. No grades, just pass/fail with lots of hippiness going around. Lost my virginity at age 17 to the bass player in my band. It turned out she had had sex with the lead singer only hours before.
It sucked as I took a semester off after a year and lived at home. Then I went back, did another semester, then dropped out. I ended up with 4 semesters worth of work.So I move back home (Reston) and work as a bell man at the local hotel for like a year. Then she got her orders to go back to Japan so I moved in with an old New College roommate in College Park and got a job as a mechanic. Did this for a couple of years until I decided I wanted to go back to school. I picked Catholic because they had D3 sports and it had always been my dream to play organized football.
So I go back to school and join the football team my senior year (coach wanted me to do offseason lifting since I had never played before). Played like 5 plays and graduated with a BS in Comp Sci. with like a 3.9. We won the ODAC and got a playoff beth but lost in the first round. Stayed for grad school, played my 5th year of eligibility (like 3 plays), then finished grad school (Master of Finance).
Oh yeah around this time I find out that my mom never actually divorced my dad but had told everybody (including her dad, sister, etc.) that she had. She said it was because if she had divorced him he wouldn't have had health insurance. I'm sure generations of Catholic guilt also factored into this.
My last semester of school my dad got real sick. I flew down to C.R. and he died 2 weeks later. We buried his ashes in July.
Now I work in IT at a well-known quasi governmental body and am buying a house tomorrow. I have an awesome girlfriend and while my job is pretty boring I would say my life is pretty much on track.
I think that covers most of the interesting/important stuff.
JC
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