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HumorMe
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It has been known for many years that Sex was good exercise, but until
now nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric content of
different sexual activities. Now after "original and proprietary"
research I am proud to present the results.
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent....................... 12 Calories
Without her consent.................. 187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands........................ 8 Calories
With one hand.......................... 12 Calories
With your teeth........................ 85 Calories
PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection............................. 6 Calories
Without an erection.................... 315 Calories
PRELIMINARIES:
Trying to find the clitoris................ 8 Calories
Trying to find the G-Spot.............. 92 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary................................. 12 Calories
69 lying down.! ......................... 78 Calories
69 standing up......................... 112 Calories
Wheelbarrow............................ 216 Calories
Doggy Style............................. 326 Calories
Italian chandelier.................... 912 Calories
ORGASMING:
Real................................... 112 Calories
False.................................. 315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging..................... 18 Calories
Getting up immediately................. 36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed
immediately.................................816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION:
If you are: 20-29 years old........ 36 Calories
30-39 years.............................. 80 Calories
40-49 years............................ 124 Calories
50-59 years............................ 972 Calories
60-69 years......................... 2916 Calories
70 and over......................... Results are still pending
DRESSING UP AFTERWARDS:
Calmly................................. 32 Calories
In a hurry............................. 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door... 1218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door.... 3521 Calorie
now nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric content of
different sexual activities. Now after "original and proprietary"
research I am proud to present the results.
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent....................... 12 Calories
Without her consent.................. 187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands........................ 8 Calories
With one hand.......................... 12 Calories
With your teeth........................ 85 Calories
PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection............................. 6 Calories
Without an erection.................... 315 Calories
PRELIMINARIES:
Trying to find the clitoris................ 8 Calories
Trying to find the G-Spot.............. 92 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary................................. 12 Calories
69 lying down.! ......................... 78 Calories
69 standing up......................... 112 Calories
Wheelbarrow............................ 216 Calories
Doggy Style............................. 326 Calories
Italian chandelier.................... 912 Calories
ORGASMING:
Real................................... 112 Calories
False.................................. 315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging..................... 18 Calories
Getting up immediately................. 36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed
immediately.................................816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION:
If you are: 20-29 years old........ 36 Calories
30-39 years.............................. 80 Calories
40-49 years............................ 124 Calories
50-59 years............................ 972 Calories
60-69 years......................... 2916 Calories
70 and over......................... Results are still pending
DRESSING UP AFTERWARDS:
Calmly................................. 32 Calories
In a hurry............................. 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door... 1218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door.... 3521 Calorie
