Homer Speaks

[Freak Show]

"I know you're mad at me right now, and I'm kinda mad too...I mean, we could sit here and try to figure out 'who forgot to pick up who' till the cows come hom. But lets just say we're both wrong and that'll be that."

 

[J-Ro]

Homer: I remember my first day of school.

*flashback*

Grandpa: Homer, you're dumb as mule and twice as ugly. If a stranger offers you a ride, I say take it.

Homer: Lousy traumatic childhood!

 

[J-Ro]

*Homer wandering onto a construction site*

Homer: "Must hurt self, must hurt self, must hurt self."

*Wrench falls and he runs under it, but misses it.*

*Bucket of concrete falls and he runs under it, but misses it.*

Homer: "D'oh!"

*Wheelbarrow of cinder blocks falls onto worker and crushes him*

Homer: "Hmm, Probably better that didn't hit me."

 

[J-Ro]

Clerk: Lucky for you, this stuff doesn't work.

 

[Drew Carey]

my fave


"It sucks when hindsight is 20/20"

 

[downsent]

Marge do you have other men in the house, Atomic men?

 

[bgdaddysmooth]

This thread rules!! I can throw out Homer quotes until I'm blue in the face.

1. "I like my beer cold, my TV loud, and my homosexuals FLAMING."

2. Bart: Bye Homer, I'm off to the father son picnic.

Homer: Hmph...you don't even have a son

3. Homer portraying King Solomon in a dream. Lenny and Carl are arguing over who is the owner of a pie: "I will take this sword and cut it in half. You both will get..........death, I'll eat the pie"

I'll be back with more.........

 

[bgdaddysmooth]

This thread rules!! I can throw out Homer quotes until I'm blue in the face.

1. "I like my beer cold, my TV loud, and my homosexuals FLAMING."

2. Bart: Bye Homer, I'm off to the father son picnic.

Homer: Hmph...you don't even have a son

3. Homer portraying King Solomon in a dream. Lenny and Carl are arguing over who is the owner of a pie: "I will take this sword and cut it in half. You both will get..........death, I'll eat the pie"

I'll be back with more.........

 

[Hannibal]

"Oh, everything's too damned expensive these days. This Bible cost 15 bucks! And talk about a preachy book! Everybody's a sinner! Except this guy."

 

[WODIN]

"Marge...I said Wooo Hooo!"